by Alla Kar
Cade: Ah, shit.
I drop my phone and immediately get dressed while I call a taxi. The house is trashed. A couple of people are passed out in the living room. Will can handle it.
Will. I try to think of something, anything that happened last night, but everything is fuzzy. I stand on the corner as the taxi pulls up. Once I’m in, we ride in silence while something dances on the edge of my thoughts. Something I’m missing. Something isn’t right.
I pay the driver when we pull into the jail’s parking lot. I hurry inside and check with the lady at the front desk. My knees bounce against the floor of the waiting room. I tug at my lip and try to remember what happened. When the woman at the desk calls me over, I bound up and pay the bond for Cade to leave.
Ten minutes later, Cade walks through the double doors, and I bound out of my seat. He looks like hell. His shirt is bloody, there’s a scrape above his eyebrow, and he looks pissed as hell. “Cade,” I say, sinking into his arms.
He kisses the top of my head, lowers his hands to my shoulders, and pushes me back. “Where have you been? I called you a thousand times.”
“I-I didn’t hear my phone ring. Will gave me something to drink and I got really dizzy…There is…something is off today. It’s not sexual—I don’t think.”Cade furrows his brow.
“Hold on. Let me get my keys.” He walks to the front desk for his items. Once we’re outside he calls us a taxi.
“Okay, so what’s going on?”
I bite my lip. “You first. You were the one in jail, Cade.”
He rolls his eyes. “Someone called the cops on me for fighting. And once we got it figured out, they wouldn’t release me until someone came and bailed me out. You were the only person I could think of.”
“Why were you fighting?”
He sighs and waves me off. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
“Okay,” I whisper. “I went to the party last night. I drank a little. Will asked me to dance.” I try to avoid Cade’s death glare. “And…”
He reaches out and tilts my chin upward. “What happened?”
I shrug and let out a small sob. “I woke up naked this morning. I don’t feel like I had sex or anything but…I feel weird.”
Cade’s face is stone. I can’t make out what he’s thinking or if he’s mad at me. “Where were you naked?” he asks, his voice grave.
“My bed. I only had two drinks, I think. I’m so confused,” I say, trying to keep my voice to a whisper.
“Shh…” Cade drags me closer to him. “Calm down. Maybe you undressed yourself,” he says. His voice sounds gentle, but the way his hands tightly hold me, I can tell he’s trying to keep his cool.
We get back into the taxi and ride the rest of the way toward Dan’s to pick up Cade’s truck. He holds my hand until he can’t anymore and picks it back up once we’re in the truck.
I’m almost afraid to go home. Will, and maybe even my brother, will be there.
But the house is empty when we get there. Still trashed though. All the people who were sleeping when I left have gone, leaving behind empty Solo cups and trash.
I take a shaky breath and follow Cade into my room where he examines everything. He takes a slow breath and turns to face me. And in his hard appearance I see something I have yet to see in him—fear. “You okay to go to class?” he asks.
I press my lips together. “Are you mad at me?”
He closes his eyes, runs his hand down his face, and slowly shakes his head. “No, baby. I’m not mad at you. I just wish I could have been here with you. You shouldn’t have woken up alone.”
“It’s not your fault.”
He exhales and points toward my alarm clock. “You better get ready. I’ll drive you.”
***
Cade drops me off in front of my first class five minutes before it starts. I push my legs faster up the steps and down the long hallway. My books almost slip from my arms, so I use my knee to push them back up.
The classroom door is still open when I round the corner, and I let out a small sigh. I run inside, and that’s when I see it. It’s on the overhead projector, casting across the entire whiteboard.
Me. Naked. In my bed. Snickers echo over the room, but I’m still looking at the board. My heart isn’t beating. I’m not breathing. Everything pulls apart inside of me at once. Terror clogs my throat. Someone walks past me, holding a flier.
Tears brew in my eyes, and I can’t stop them. A hand thrusts the flier in my face, but I can’t focus to see who is holding it. It’s the same picture on the overhead.
“Okay, class. Take a seat. Why are we blocking the door—oh, God,” the teacher says from behind me.
But I’m choking. I can’t turn to explain. I can’t breathe. I turn on my heel and break through the people behind me. Fliers scatter the hallways. Hundreds. Thousands. All of me. I hear someone calling my name, but I break into a run. A few late students stare blankly at me as I race down the hallway toward the double doors.
I don’t know where I’ll go once I’m outside, but I have to get far away from here. The sunlight heats my already burning skin. I frantically dig my phone from my pocket and dial Cade’s number.
When he answers, I start to hyperventilate.
“Jaden? Calm down, baby. What’s wrong? Breathe.”
“Come,” I whisper. “Come get me.” I hear his breathing on the other end and I pray he doesn’t ask why.
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
I press my back against the brick building and bring my knees to my chin. The tears haven’t stopped, and my nose is running all over my face.
I don’t know how long I sit there. But I feel Cade’s approach before I hear or see him. His arms wrap around me, lifting me to my feet.
“What’s the matter?” he asks.
I sniffle, holding my arm around my waist to keep myself together. “There were naked pictures of me. Everywhere.”
I keep my eyes closed and head down, hoping no one passing by will recognize me. Please, God. This can’t be happening.
Cade’s silence startles me, so I glance up at him through watery eyes. His face is calm, but his eyes look angry, feral. I watch his Adam’s apple bob in his throat as he swallows. “Let’s go.”
He grabs my arm, hauling me to his side and takes long strides toward his pickup. Once I’m inside, he starts the engine and spins his tires out of the parking lot.
***
My mind is reeling, but my mouth won’t open. Cade’s going way over the speed limit, hauling ass around each curb until we pull into our apartment complex. I spot Will’s SUV, and my heart starts to jackhammer in my chest.
“Cade,” I warn when he jumps out of the driver’s side and heads toward the apartment. “Cade!” I yell this time, desperately trying to keep up with his long strides, but by the time I catch up he’s already standing in the middle of the living room floor, searching through a phone. I stop, eyes wide, and try to catch my breath. Will is pale, his hands clenched beside him. A wild look is in his eyes, and it doesn’t set right with me.
“You told him I raped you?” he asks me.
“What? I didn’t say that.”
Cade holds his hand outward. “I didn’t say rape, jackass. I said took pictures.” He continues to fumble through his phone and then stills. He must have found something because he isn’t moving. I can’t even tell if he’s breathing.
Will’s gaze snaps to mine, and I see him slowly swallow. The silence is so loud in my ears I can’t hear myself breathe. Cade throws Will’s phone to me. I barely catch it before he’s on top of Will.
His fists hit his face over and over. The bone breaks beneath the blows. Will doesn’t even look like he’s moving, and I’m trying my best to keep my head. Everything is hazy.
The tears blurring my vision aren’t letting up. My shaking fingers are curled around my phone, but I have no one to call for help. My dad doesn’t care. And my brother is pissed.
The sound of Cade’s fists hitting
bone sends chills down my spine. He’d just been in jail for the night for fighting his mother’s battles, and now he’s fighting mine.
At first I try calling out to him, but Cade isn’t listening. The hazy look in his eyes is trancelike. He’s a man on a mission that isn’t letting anything stop him. But I have to. He’s going to kill him. “Cade!” I scream, my voice unrecognizable.
Cade’s fists stops mid-swing and his green eyes meet mine. “That’s enough,” I say. “You’re already in trouble for fighting.”
Cade’s jaw is tight, fist still raised when the door swings open.
Adam steps inside, looking like he hasn’t slept or eaten in two days. “What the…” He trails off before running toward Cade and pulling him off Will.
Will lays there lifeless, head to the side, blood smearing his face.
“What is going on?” Adam yells as Cade pushes against him.
“Let me go. I’m finished,” Cade says, but Adam holds him tighter.
“What happened?” he yells again.
But all I can do is cry. Cade breaks from his grasp and turns on him. I watch in horror as they square off at each other.
No. No. No. Not my brother. “Your best fucking friend over here drugged your sister’s drink and took naked pictures of her. And then posted fliers at school!”
Adam’s face falls, and he looks over at me. “Jaden?”
But I turn my head and screw my eyes shut. No more pity. No more of this pain. I hear Adam growl, and he kicks the side of the living room table so hard the glass in the middle breaks. “Fuck!” he screams, grabbing his hair. “I’m so sorry Jade. I should have been here.”
More tears suffocate me. I can hear Adam and Cade talking, but I can’t make out the words. Everything is hazy, I feel high and light.
Cade carries me down the stairs and toward his truck. “Where are we going?”
“I’m taking you to my house.”
“What about Adam. He—”
“He’s fine with it. And even if he wasn’t it doesn’t matter. I want you far away from this place.”
I furrow my brow and ignore the throbbing pain in my skull. “What about the cops? You know he’ll call the cops when he wakes up. And school? I don’t—”
“Jaden,” he warns. “I’ll take care of everything. Relax and get some sleep.”
As badly as I want to stay up and figure everything out, my tiredness wins, dragging me down into a much-needed sleep.
Chapter Twenty
Jaden
“Can you believe she slept with him? I mean they’ve only been talking for about two weeks. What a slut,” someone whispered.
Warmth swarmed my cheeks, and I hid in the protection of my hood. The whispers had started that morning. Everyone already knew I’d slept with Justin, probably before I knew I was going to sleep with Justin.
Pressing my books to my chest, I walked down the hallway toward Jennifer’s locker. She stood shoving books away at a record pace.
“Wow, you’re in a hurry,” I said, sliding in next to her to open my locker door.
She didn’t answer, and I looked her over. She faced forward, trying her best to hurry and grab her books. “Hello, Jennifer?” I said, waving my hand in front of her face.
She shrugged me off, shut her locker and left.
My heart fell through my stomach as I watched my only friend walk away. That was the last time I ever talked to her.
I shoved my books into my locker and headed to the cafeteria.
Most of the lunchroom was filled by the time I walked in with my plate. Our normal table was in the corner close to the EXIT, but Jennifer wasn’t sitting there. Not that I expected her to. She had just tossed out six years of friendship like a molded loaf of bread.
I took the seat closest to the door so I could watch people walk in. The sound of my heart was heavy in my eardrums as I quickly tried to eat. The pizza was gross, and I only eat the toppings anyway, so I slid them to the side and picked out the pepperonis.
“She doesn’t know yet?” some girl at the next table whispered. “I swear she doesn’t. You should so go and tell her.” They giggled. “Yeah, I’ll go with you.”
I heard their chairs scrape against the tile and then the clacking of their shoes on the floor. I followed them with my eyes as they walked to Selena.
Trying to shrug it off, I pretended to be interested in my plate which the smell was making my stomach queasy.
“What?” Selena screeched. Her fists slam the table, rattling the surface. “She did not!”
My gaze—hell, everyone’s gaze—was on Selena. But someone else caught my attention first. Jennifer sat across from Selena, watching me. Then she dropped her head and started eating.
My heart broke in two. She had tossed me aside for the people who had tormented me? What the hell was going on here?
“Oh, shit!” someone yelled.
I looked up to find Selena standing over me, one perfectly plucked eyebrow lifted, and a sneer riding her jaw. “You’re going down, bitch,” she said.
And she kept her promise.
***
My scream rattles my ears when I sit up in bed. I’m suddenly aware that I’m not in my room anymore but at Cade’s, but that doesn’t make me relax.
Tears pull at the corner of my eyes. A small Post-It note flutters off my stomach.
Went to take care of things. Be back soon.
Cade
The letter falls from my hand as I try to stop the tears from forming. Slowly, I make my way to the kitchen where I get a glass of water. It doesn’t help the ache in my chest, but it does relieve my scratchy throat.
Cade’s mother isn’t here, so I’m assuming she’s still in rehab. Slowly, I walk down the hallway and strip out of my clothes. I fold them in a nice pile and place them on the back of the toilet before I step into the shower.
My tears mix with the water, and I can’t tell if I’m even crying anymore. All I can feel is the hurt eating away at me, slowly. The image on the overhead is still flickering through my mind. All my memories from high school are there to remind me that I’m never that far away from my past.
The hot water numbs my skin, and I carefully lay down in the tub and let the water wash down on me. I try not to think, but it’s impossible not to relive what happened only hours ago. I watch the steam rise off of my body as I lay helplessly. Cade’s disposable razor is sitting on the side of the tub; my fingers run over it and then back again.
Just one time won’t hurt. It’ll take the pain away long enough for me to breathe. For my heart to try and heal.
“It’s not worth it, Jade.”
I screw my eyes shut. “How do you know it’s not? I could take the pain away, just for a second—”
The shower curtain flies open, and I’m jerked out of the tub. Water rolls down my body, and my hair sticks to my neck. Cade’s jaw is locked and a plea hangs over his face. “I’m not willing to let you go. But I can’t fight for you if you don’t fight for yourself, Jaden.”
Five rough fingers palm the nape of my neck. “I know you’re hurting. Hell, I don’t know half of what you went through last year, but I promise I’ll be here no matter the damage. No matter the fucked up past you have. No matter the heartache to come.” He closes his eyes for a brief moment. “Look at me. I’ve put myself through hell for my mother, but it’s paying off now. She’s trying. And even though I got tossed in jail defending her, I don’t regret it. It’s made me stronger, Jaden.”
Cade sits us down on the closed toilet seat. “And I can help you get stronger. All you need is love, and I’ve got that for you. More than I even realized.”
I gaze up at him through hooded, tear-coated eyes as my bottom lip trembles. His big green eyes are intense, both brows pulled down in the middle. He presses a kiss to the top of my forehead, the scruff of his jaw scraping my skin.
“What about Adam?” I whisper though a clogged throat
Cade growls and presses his forehead to mine. “
You let me take care of Adam, Princess. He’ll come around. And between your brother and me, you’ve got all the family you need.”
I sob into his chest as he rocks me like a baby. I don’t care that I’m naked or that I’m soaking his clothes. I don’t care about anything but him. His touch. His lips. His words. Everything about him helps heal that hollow ache deep in my chest.
And even though I’m once again teetering on the brink of insanity, this time, one ray of sunshine pokes through that dark hole of despair.
Chapter Twenty-One
Cade
“Adam called me today.”
I glance over my beer bottle and look at Jaden. She’s wearing those damn yoga pants again, with her hair in a long braid. Her tank top is tight to her flat stomach, and don’t get me started on her ass.
“Are you listening to me?” she asks, sitting the bowl of mashed potatoes down on the dining room table.
I grin over at her. “Adam called you today. Did you answer?”
She slowly shakes her head. The sides of her mouth pull down in the corners, and she pretends to busy herself with the already perfect table setting.
I stand up, dropping my beer on the living room table. “And why haven’t you called him?” I ask, picking at the fried chicken she’s now holding.
She pops my hand, and I lift an eyebrow. “Because I don’t know what to say, Cade.”
I grab her waist, take the chicken, and place it back on the counter before pulling her back to me. “What are you confused about?”
She looks flustered as hell about it. Resting my hands on her hips, I bend down to nip at her jaw. “Spill it, Jaden.”
She huffs and grabs a tight hold onto my work shirt. “I don’t know what to tell him about us.”
Oh, she wants to define our relationship and doesn’t have the guts to say it. This will be fun. I grin and run my thumb across her bottom lip. “What about us, Princess? Are you speaking English right now?”
Another sigh and she tugs on my shirt. “I mean…do I tell him we’re…dating? Or just fucking around?”