"Which is why I call you 'catling'—" Talia interrupted with a grin, "—since you're fully as curious as any cat."
"Too true. Curiosity sometimes pays, though; I started going through the things she left, and doing a bit of discreet correspondence with my paternal relatives."
"Does your mother know this?" Talia was a bit surprised.
"It's with her blessing. By the way, I get the feeling that Uncle-King Faramentha likes me as much as he disliked my father. We've gotten into quite a cozy little exchange of letters and family anecdotes. I like him, too— and it's rather too bad we're so closely related; he's got a whole tribe of sons, and I think anybody with a sense of humor like his would be 38
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rather nice to get to know..." Elspeth's voice trailed off wistfully, then she got back to the subject at hand with a little shake of her head. "Anyway, now we're not altogether certain that the Hulda who left Rethwellan is the same Hulda who arrived here."
" What? "
"Oh, it's so much fun to shock you. You look like somebody just hit you in the face with a board!"
"Elspeth, I may kill you myself if you don't get to the point!"
"All right, I'll be good! It's rather late in the day to be checking on these things now, but there was a span of about a month after Hulda left the Royal Nursery in Rethwellan to come here where she just seems to have vanished. She wasn't passed across the Border, and no one remembers her in the inns along the way. Then— poof!— she's here, bag and baggage.
Father wasn't among the living anymore through his own stupid fault, and she had all the right papers and letters; nobody thought to doubt that she was the 'Hulda' he'd sent for. Until now, that is."
"Bright Lady!" Talia grew as cold as her breakfast, thinking about the multitude of possibilities this opened up. Had the unknown "my lord" she and Skif had seen her conspiring with brought her here? They had no way of knowing if that one had been among those traitors uncovered and executed after Ylsa's murder, for neither of them had ever seen his face.
They thought he had been, for there were no other stirrings of trouble after that, but he might only have gone to ground for an interval. Had even "my lord" guessed that she was not what she seemed? And where had she vanished to after she was unmasked? No one had seen her leave; she had not passed the Border, at least by the roads (and that was an echo of what Elspeth had just detailed), yet she was most assuredly gone before anyone had a chance to detain her. And who— or what— had given her warning that she had been uncovered? A danger that Talia had long thought safely laid to rest had suddenly resurrected itself, the cockatrice new-hatched from the dunghill.
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"Mero is going to have my hide," Elspeth warned, and Talia started guiltily and finished her meal. But she really couldn't have told what she was eating.
* * *
"— and that was the last incident," Kris finished. "The last couple of weeks were nothing but routine; we finished up, Griffon relieved us, and we headed home." He met the measuring gazes of first Elcarth, then Kyril. Both of them were shocked cold sober by his revelation of the way Talia's Gift had gone rogue— and why. They had evidently assumed this interview was going to be a mere formality. Kris' tale had come as an unpleasant surprise.
"Why," Kyril asked, after a pause that was much too long for Kris'
comfort, "didn't you look for help when this first happened?"
"Largely because by the time I knew something was really wrong, we were snowed into that Waystation, Senior."
"He's got you there, brother." Elcarth favored the silver-haired Seneschal's Herald with a wry smile.
"By the time we got out, she was well on the way to having her problems solved," Kris continued doggedly. "She had the basics, had them down firmly. And once we got in with people again, we found that those rumors had preceded us. At that point, I reckoned we'd do irreparable harm by leaving the circuit to look for other help. We'd only have confirmed the rumor that there was something wrong by doing so."
"Hm. A point," Kyril acknowledged.
"And at that point, I wasn't entirely certain that there was anyone capable of training her."
"Healers—" Elcarth began.
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"Don't have Empathy alone, nor do they use it exactly the way she does—the way she must. She's actually used it offensively, as I told you. They rarely invoke the use of it outside of Healing sessions; she is going to have to use it so constantly it will be as much a part of her as her eyes and ears.
At least," Kris concluded with an embarrassed smile, "that's the way I had it figured."
"I think that in this case you were right, young brother," Kyril replied after long thought, during which time Kris had plenty of leisure to think about all he'd said, and wonder if he'd managed to convince these two, the most senior Heralds in the Circle.
Kris let out a breath he didn't even realize he'd been holding.
"There was this, too," he added. "At that point, letting out word that we, and the Collegium, had failed to properly train the new Queen's Own would have been devastating to everyone's morale."
"Bright Goddess— you're right!" Elcarth exclaimed with consternation, his eyebrows rising to meet his gray cap of hair. "For that to become well known would be as damaging to the faith of Heralds as it would to that of nonHeralds. I think, given the circumstances, you both deserve high marks. You, for your good sense and discretion, and your internee for meeting and overcoming trials she should never have had to face."
"I agree," Kyril seconded. "Now, if you'll excuse us, Elcarth and I will endeavor to set such safeguards as to ensure this never happens again."
With a polite farewell, Kris thankfully fled their presence.
* * *
In the hour after breakfast, Talia covered a great deal of ground. She first left the Herald's Collegium and crossed to the separate building that housed Healer's Collegium and the House of Healing. The sun was up by now, though it hadn't been when she'd gone to breakfast, and from the cloudless blue of the sky it looked as if it were going to be another flawless spring day. Once within the beige-brick walls, she sought out 41
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Healer Devan, to let him know of her return, and to learn from him if there were any Herald-patients in the House of Healing that needed her own special touch.
She found him in the still-room, carefully mixing some sort of decoction.
She entered very quietly, not wanting to break his concentration, but somehow he knew she was there anyway.
"Word spreads quickly; I knew you'd gotten back last night," he said without turning around. "And most welcome you are, too, Talia!"
She chuckled a little. "I should know better than to try and sneak up on someone with the same Gift I have!"
He set his potion down on the table before him, stoppered it with care, and turned to face her. As a smile reached and warmed his hazel eyes, he held out brown-stained hands in greeting.
"Your aura, child, is unmistakable— and right glad I am to feel it again."
She took both his hands in her own, wrinkling her nose a little at the pungent odors of the still-room. "I hope you're glad to see me for my own sake, and not because you need me desperately," she replied.
Much to her relief, he assured her that there were no Heralds at all among his patients at the moment.
"Just wait until the Midsummer storms South, or the pirate-raids West, though!" he told her, his dark eyes rueful. "Rynee will have her Greens by winter; she's got every intention of going back South to be stationed near her home. You're back in good time; you'll be the only trained mind-Healer besides Patris here when she leaves, and it's possible we may need you for patients other than Heralds."
* * *
Next she returned to the Herald's Wing for an interview she had not been looking forward to.
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She knocked hesitant
ly on the door to Elcarth's office; and found that not only was Elcarth there, but that the Seneschal's Herald was with the Dean.
During the next hour she reported, as dispassionately as she could, all that had happened during her internship. She did not spare herself in the least, admitting fully that she had concealed the fact that she was losing control over her Gift; admitting that she did not confess the fact until forced to by Kris. She told them what Kris had not; that she had nearly killed both of them.
They heard her out in complete silence until she had finished, and sat with her hands clenched in her lap, waiting for their verdict on her.
"What have you concluded from all this?" Elcarth asked unexpectedly.
"That— that no one Herald can stand alone, not even the Queen's Own,"
she replied, after thought. "Perhaps especially the Queen's Own. What I do reflects on all Heralds, and more so than any other just because I'm so much in the minds of the people."
"And of the proper usage of your Gift?" Kyril asked.
"I— I don't really know, entirely," she admitted. "There are times when what I need to do is quite clear. But most of the time, it's so— so nebulous. It's going to be pretty much a matter of weighing evils and necessity, I guess."
Elcarth nodded.
"If I have time, I'll ask advice from the Circle before I do anything irrevocable. But most of the time, I'm afraid I won't have that luxury. But if I make a mistake... well, I'll accept the consequences, and try and make it right."
"Well, Herald Talia," Elcarth said, black eyes bright with what Talia finally realized was pride, "I think you're ready to get into harness."
"Then— I passed?"
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"What did I tell you?" Kyril shook his head at his colleague. "I knew she wouldn't believe it until she heard it from our lips." The iron-haired, granite-faced Herald unbent enough to smile warmly at her. "Yes, Talia, you did very well; we're quite pleased with what you and Kris have told us. You took a desperate situation that was not entirely of your own making, and turned it around, by yourselves."
" And we're satisfied with what you told us just now," Elcarth added.
"You've managed to strike a decent balance in the ethics of having a Gift like yours, I think. So now that you've had the sweet compliments, are you ready for the bitter? There's a Council meeting shortly."
"Yes, sir," she replied. "I've been... warned."
"About more than just the meeting, I'll wager."
"Senior, that would be compromising my sources—"
"Lord and Lady!" Elcarth's sharp features twitched as he controlled his urge to laugh. "She sounds like Talamir already!"
Kyril just shook his head ruefully. "That she does, brother. Well enough, Talia— we'll see you there. You'd best be off; I imagine Selenay is wanting to discuss a few things with you before the Council meeting itself."
Talia knew a dismissal when she heard one, and took her leave of both of them, with a light foot to match her lightened heart.
* * *
"Talia—" Selenay forestalled all formality by embracing her Herald warmly. "— Bright Lady, how I have missed you! Come in here where we can have a little privacy." She drew Talia into a granite-walled alcove holding a single polished wooden bench, just off the corridor leading to the Council chamber. As 44
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usual, she was dressed as any of her Heralds, with only the thin circlet of royal red-gold that rested on her own golden hair proclaiming her rank.
"Let me get a good look at you. Havens, you look wonderful! But you've gotten so thin—"
"Having to eat my own cooking," Talia replied, "that's all. I would have tried to see you last night—"
"You wouldn't have found me," Selenay said, blue eyes dark with affection. "I was closeted with the Lord Marshal, going over troop deployments on the Border. By the time we were finished, I wouldn't have been willing to see my resurrected father, I was that weary. All those damn maps! Besides, the first night back from internship is always spent with your closest friends, it's tradition! How else can you catch up on eighteen months of news?"
"Eighteen months of gossip, you mean." Talia grinned. "I understand Kris and I caused a little ourselves."
"From your offhand manner can I deduce that my thoughts of a deathless romance are in vain?" Her eyes danced with amusement and she pouted in feigned disappointment.
Talia shook her head in mock exasperation. "You, too? Bright Havens, is everyone in the Collegium determined to have us mated, whether we will or no?"
"The sole exceptions are Kyril, Elcarth, Skif, Keren, and— of all people—
Alberich. They all swore that if you ever lost your heart, it wouldn't be to Kris' pretty face."
"They... could be right."
Selenay noted her Herald's faintly troubled expression, and deemed it prudent to change the subject. "Well, I'm more than happy to have you at my side again, and I could have used you for the past two months."
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"Two months? Is it anything to do with what Elspeth sent Skif out to us for?"
"Did she? That minx! Probably— she hasn't been any more pleased over the Council's actions than I have. I've gotten an offer for Elspeth's hand, from a source that is going to be very difficult for me to refuse."
"Say on."
Selenay settled back on the bench, absently caressing the arm of it with one hand. "We received an envoy from King Alessandar two months ago, a formal request that I consider wedding Elspeth to his Ancar. There's a great deal to be said for the match; Ancar is about Kris' age, not too great a discrepancy as royal marriages go; he's said to be quite handsome. This would mean the eventual joining of our Kingdoms, and Alessandar has a strong and well-trained army, much larger than our own. I'd be able to spread the Heralds into his realm, and his army would make Karse think twice about ever invading us again. Three quarters of the Councillors are for it unconditionally, the rest favor the idea, but aren't trying to shove it down my throat like the others are."
"Well," Talia replied slowly, twisting the ring Kris had given her, "you wouldn't be hesitating over it if you didn't feel there was something wrong.
What is it?"
"Firstly, unless I absolutely have to, I don't want Elspeth sacrificed in a marriage of state. Frankly, I'd rather see her live unwedded and have the throne go to a collateral line than have her making anything but a match that is at least based on mutual respect and liking." Selenay played with a lock of hair, twisting it around one of her long, graceful fingers, thereby betraying her anxiety. "Secondly, she's very young yet; I'm going to insist she finish her training before making a decision. Thirdly, I haven't seen Ancar since he was a babe in arms; I have no idea what kind of a man he's grown into, and I want to know that before I even begin to seriously consider the match. To tell the truth, I'm hoping for her to have a love-match, and that with someone who is at least Chosen if not a Herald. I saw for myself the kind of problems that can come when the Queen's consort is not co-ruler, yet has been trained to the idea of rule. And you know very 46
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well that Elspeth's husband will not share the Throne unless he, too, is Chosen."
"Good points, all of them— but you have more than that troubling you."
Talia had fallen into reading the Queen's state of mind as easily as if she'd never been away.
"Now I know why I've missed you! You always manage to ask the question that puts everything into perspective!" Selenay smiled again, with delight. "Yes, I do, but it wasn't the kind of thing I wanted to confess to the Council, or even to Kyril, bless his heart. They'd put it down to a silly woman's maunderings and mutter about moon-days. What's bothering me is this: it's too pat, this offer; it's too perfect. Too much like the answer to everyone's prayers. I keep looking for the trap beneath the bait, and wondering why I can't see it. Perhaps I'm so in the habit of suspicion that I can't trust even what I know to
be honest."
"No, I don't think that's it." Talia pursed her lips thoughtfully. "There is something out of kilter, or you wouldn't be so uneasy. You've Mindspeech and a touch of Foreseeing, right? I suspect that you're getting foggy Foresight that something isn't quite right about the idea, and your uneasiness is being caused by having to fight the Council with no real reasons to give them."
"Bless you— that's exactly what it must be! I've been feeling for the past two months as if I were trying to bail a leaky boat with my bare hands!"
"So use Elspeth's youth and the fact that she has to finish her training as an excuse to stall for a while. I'll back you; when Kyril and Elcarth see that I'm backing you, they'll follow my lead," Talia said with more confidence than she actually felt. "Remember, I have a full vote in the Council now.
Between the two of us we have the power to veto even the vote of the full Council. All it takes is the Monarch and Queen's Own to overturn a Council vote. I'll admit it isn't politic to do so, but I'll do it if I have to."
Selenay sighed with relief. "How have I ever managed all these years without you?"
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"Very well, thank you. If I hadn't been here, I expect you'd have managed to stall them somehow— even if you had to resort to Devan physicking Elspeth into a phony fever to gain time! Now, isn't it time to make our entrance?"
"Indeed it is." Selenay smiled, with just a hint of maliciousness. "And this is a moment I have long waited for! There are going to be some cases of chagrin when certain folk realize you are Queen's Own in truth, vote and all, and that the full Council will be in session from now on!"
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