by Di Jones
“Why didn’t you tell me Carmen was your manager? I assume that’s the same Carmen you dated for a while?”
Annoyance prickled his skin and he rubbed the back of his neck. Why was he being ambushed in this way? He hadn’t done anything wrong, so why was Harmony interrogating him?
His band mates looked as if they wished they were anywhere but here and after a few minutes Steve leaned his guitar against an amplifier and left the stage with the other band members, leaving Emery and Harmony alone.
“Yes. That is the same Carmen. I didn’t think it was important that you knew she was my manager.” He folded his arms across his chest.
So did Harmony. “But she was important enough for you to tell me you used to go out with her, so why not tell me the full story?”
Emery couldn’t answer her, and he didn’t really want to. He wasn’t used to people questioning him like this. In Los Angeles everyone did what he said without asking any questions or making any excuses.
“I don’t understand what’s going on here.” Harmony’s voice rose in a most unattractive way and he winced. “But I’m feeling really uncomfortable. You are actually thinking of going back to LA for this private party, aren’t you?”
He hadn’t been, but he didn’t like her tone. “It would definitely boost my career. Anyway, the local businesses have already benefitted hugely from me being here.”
“So you are thinking of going?”
“Not exactly.” He couldn’t stand the look on her face, so he turned his back so he couldn’t see her downturned mouth and flinty eyes.
“Emery. You’re either going or you’re not. Don’t play semantics with me please. And turn around and look at me.”
He could feel a vein pulsing under his eye. Slowly, he turned around to face her. “And you stop ordering me around.”
“I’m not doing anything of the sort. I’m trying to find out what’s going on. This Carmen turns up and all of a sudden you’re talking about going back to LA to do something on the same night you’ve committed yourself here.
“Is it so wrong to consider this offer?” he asked, although he knew it was. Anyway, he wasn’t going to take the offer, of course he wasn’t. He was just feeling so…pressured.
And if there was one thing he couldn’t handle, it was being pressured.
Thirteen
Harmony
Harmony blinked rapidly, her gaze unfocused. She brought her hand to her forehead, wondering if Emery just said what she thought he had. It was an unpleasant flashback, because he’d sounded remarkably like the man who had left her for Los Angeles years back to chase his dreams.
She shook her head, feeling as if minutes had gone by. This wasn’t the same man who’d come back to help his town get back on its feet. What on the earth had happened to him? Was he having a relationship with Carmen and he’d been caught out? Maybe Carmen was demanding he go back and he couldn’t say no because she was still his girlfriend. Endless possibilities ran through her mind, but one conclusion rose to the top of the mush that was in her brain.
Emery was still the same selfish person he’d always been. Maybe that was a required skill set for being a celebrity, and if that was the case, no wonder he’d hit the big time.
In her own version of a waking nightmare, she turned and walked away. But she had more pride than that. She turned back.
“The Emery I knew wouldn’t leave his family and friends high and dry to chase a gig. I’m really disappointed in you but at the end of the day we’ll do this concert with or without you.”
His eyes darkened and a flush suffused his face. “Who do you think you are to tell me what to do?”
She wanted to reach out and touch him, to placate him but her pride wouldn’t let her. “I’m not telling you what to do. It’s obvious you wouldn’t listen anyway. You’re doing what’s right for you and that’s what you’ve always done, isn’t it?” She narrowed her eyes, trying not to cry.
“Don’t preach to me.” He shook his head and when he looked back up his eyes were hard and unflinching. “You’ve never done anything except stay here in Lewiston, Harmony. You have no idea what it’s like in the real world.”
A lump formed in her throat, and her head banged with the effort of keeping her emotions together. What on the earth had happened to the kind, loving man she’d been spending time with?
“Don’t put me down because I’ve stayed here. I love this place. And you said you did too. Moving to California has changed you, Emery. I thought you were the same guy that I used to know but you’re not. You’re selfish. You’ll be nice to people and you’ll go along with things as long as it suits you. But as soon as there is some conflict you’re going to put yourself first, each and every time.
“And why shouldn’t I? I’ve worked hard for my success. I don’t owe anyone anything. I don’t owe you anything, and I don’t owe this town anything either.”
There was a thundering in Harmony’s ears, and a bitter taste rose up her esophagus, but she bit it back, instead turning the sensation into an angry growl. She couldn’t bear to be around him, so she turned on her heel, her back straight, and walked away. Tears streamed down her face, but she knew one thing for sure, Emery Dante wasn’t worth any effort. She opened the door and as she was just about to step through she heard him calling her.
His voice was contrite…sort of. “Harmony? I’m sorry… come back. Let’s talk about this.”
But she was beyond talking. She’d been let down badly by Emery Dante once before and she’d survived that. She could do it again. She carried on out the door, her fists and her heart clenched, and didn’t look back.
“What’s going on?” her mother asked. Her father had gone to his study as soon as the meal had finished, leaving, he said, to let his best girls have some time alone. Her father hadn’t noticed something was wrong, but Harmony’s mom never missed a trick. “I thought you’d be spending the evening with Emery rather than coming home for dinner. You haven’t had a fight, have you?”
Should she tell her mother? She didn’t usually tell her mom the ins and outs of her love life, but Gladys clearly knew something was seriously wrong. Her mom moved around the table and sat next to her, taking her hand and squeezing it. That one small gesture was enough to open old wounds and new ones.
Her eyes stung with the pain of holding back tears and a lump formed in her throat. “Sort of—”
“A production like this is very stressful. It’ll be fine in the morning, whatever it is. You’ll see, darling.”
Her mother’s sympathetic tone opened the floodgates and between strangled sobs Harmony tried to tell her what was going on. Relaying her and Emery’s argument made it more real, and the expressions on her mother’s face—of disbelief, disappointment and protectiveness of her only child—told her that she wasn’t judging him too harshly.
“It’s hard to believe he’d do that. I know he’s done this to you before, but since coming back he’s seemed like a changed person. Are you sure you understood him properly, Harmony?”
“Yes. He said he didn’t owe me anything, or the town—”
“He said what?”
Arnold stood in the doorway of the kitchen, his usually benign expression twisted with fury.
“How long have you been standing there, dear?” her mother asked him.
“Long enough. Has he left town?”
Harmony brought her hand to her chest, as if the ache deep inside her were a physical ailment she could ease by rubbing it. “I don’t know,” she told her parents. “He’s been phoning me, but I haven’t answered. Surely he wouldn’t go, would he? No, I don’t believe for a second that he’d really leave.”
Her parents exchanged a look, and she could see they thought she was deluding herself.
“It might be better if he did leave,” Arnold growled. “Because if he’s still here and I see him, I’ll run him out of town myself. I’m not having him hurt you for a second time.”
Fourteen
&n
bsp; Emery
Emery gasped as Harmony left the auditorium, his stomach tight and hard. Had she just walked out on him after he’d called her back? No one had done that to him in a long time…if ever. He stood on the spot for a moment, expecting her to come back, but she didn’t. Finally he left too, wondering if she was still outside.
He tried to appear nonchalant as he left, but he glanced around surreptitiously. Harmony was nowhere to be seen. She’d actually gone, as had Carmen. The boys were still there though, talking amongst themselves.
He strolled over to them casually, not wanting them to see he was upset.
“Emery, what’s happening? Are you okay?” Steve asked, giving him a quizzical look.
“Yes. I’m fine.” He scratched his head; still puzzled that Harmony had left. “No. I’m not sure. Harmony just walked out on me.”
“Yeah, we saw her leave. She didn’t look too happy,” Jack said.
“We’re trying to decide what to do.” Rob rubbed his nose, signaling he was uncomfortable with the impasse. “We don’t know whether to head back to the airport and fly home, or if we should stay here. It’s up to you, man. Whatever you decide, we’re here to support you.”
“Thanks, that means a lot.” Emery slung an arm over Rob’s shoulder. “Come and stay the night at my place. It’s too late to go to the airport now. I’ll decide tomorrow morning what we should do.”
“That sounds good. I’m definitely too tired to drive anywhere.” Steve threw the keys at Jack. “Did you walk or drive here, Emery?”
“My car’s over there. I don’t live far from here. Follow me.”
Back at his place, he fired up the grill, and threw on some burgers while the boys settled in. When they joined him in the kitchen, he nodded towards the fridge. “Beer’s in there, and the ginger ale. Help yourself. Rob, the bourbon’s over there and you’ll find glasses in that cupboard above the countertop. Make me one too, buddy. And make it a very large double.”
He flipped the burgers, slapped them on buns along with cheese, fried eggs and ketchup, and joined the boys in front of the large flat screen TV. Rob handed him the bourbon and as the effervescent beverage slid down Emery’s throat, he closed his eyes for a second. Then he took a deep, contented sigh, and leaned back, feeling more in control as the alcohol entered his bloodstream.
After eating, and another drink or two, Emery pulled out his acoustic guitar. He put the strap over his shoulder, rapped the fingerboard and picked out the melody line of one of his songs. Jack pulled a harmonica out of his pocket, and Rob and Steve sang.
At the end of the song Emery passed the guitar to Steve. Leaning back, he listened to his friend’s technique, Steve’s skill as good as his own. He’d missed this…being with other musicians who had the same passion and drive he did. His mind drifted with the music and for a few moments he forgot everything.
When Steve finished, Emery remembered his conversation with Harmony, and a sick feeling rose in his gut. He excused himself and went to the kitchen for another drink. Tonight, he told himself as he poured another bourbon, he’d put all thoughts of his predicament out of his mind. He and the boys sang and drank into the small hours, pausing to reminisce about fun times they’d had on tour. At three, they finally went to bed, and Emery fell into a ragged sleep, anesthetized by the huge volume of booze he’d drunk.
The next morning he woke at eight, listening to the silence of the house then remembering he had a decision to make. He squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to sleep a while longer but his hangover was too severe for that. Rolling out of bed he walked into his bathroom and groaned when he caught sight of his bloodshot eyes and dull skin in the mirrored cabinet. You’re a star, he told his reflection, but look at the state of you. You look like a total loser. He opened the cabinet, pulled out some Advil and chased a couple tablets down with water. Then he got back into bed, but he was too awake and keyed up to go back to sleep.
How was Harmony feeling this morning? Was she as miserable as he was? He needed to speak to her before giving his decision to the guys, and he couldn’t expect them to wait around all day. Leaning over, he picked up his phone from the bedside table and called her. Her cellphone rang and rang, and as it did, his gut roiled with nausea. He hung up as her message kicked in then rang straight back. Come on, Harmony. Pick up. She didn’t, so this time he left a message. I’m sorry about yesterday. Look, please give me a call and we can sort this out.
As he lay in bed waiting for her to return his call, he thought long and hard about the events of the last twenty-four hours. As much as he hated to admit it, Harmony was right about him. Since moving to California he’d changed, and it was only when he saw the hurt in her eyes he knew just how much he’d altered. But he shouldn’t need to defend that, should he? He’d dreamed of being a rock star since he was a young child and that desire had been such an integral part of him that he knew he couldn’t ignore his dreams. That’s why he’d moved to Los Angeles in the first place, so he could be true to himself and do whatever he needed to do in order to make it. Sure, that success might have changed him, but he wouldn’t give it up for the world.
After a while he decided she wasn’t going to ring him back so he got up. He was the first into the kitchen and put on the strong pot of coffee that they’d all need after the heavy drinking the night before. He was sitting at the table nursing his second cup—and his head—when Steve joined him. “How did you sleep?” he asked his friend.
Steve helped himself to a cup of coffee before answering. “Better than you from the looks of it. You look terrible.”
“Yeah. Got a bit on my mind. So you slept okay?”
“Deeply. It’s quiet out here, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it’s different than LA.”
“It sure is.” Jack and Rob joined them, both rubbing their eyes and looking as bad as Emery felt.
After filling their cups, Emery put another pot on the stove. This was going to be a five-coffee morning. He hadn’t felt this rough for a long time. “Anyone want breakfast?” He pulled out two fry pans and the toaster and within minutes the smell of honey-cured bacon filled the kitchen, making him feel slightly more human.
Steve set the table and soon they were all tucking into the breakfast.
“What’s happening, man?” Jack asked. “Are we staying here for the Christmas concert, or going back to LA?”
Emery pulled his phone out of his pocket. Harmony still hadn’t rung, and his gut told him she wasn’t going to. He wished he could defer his decision a bit longer, but it wasn’t fair on the guys, and anyway, he wasn’t going to wait around for any woman. “I’ve decided we’re going back,” he said in a more resolute tone than he actually felt. “I’m going to ring Carmen now and tell her we’re going to do the private party.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want to do, Emery?” Steve gave him a searching look and he wished his bass guitarist didn’t know him so well. He suspected his friend could see something in his expression that he, Emery, couldn’t even acknowledge himself.
He shook his head and sighed. “I’m not entirely sure, but I don’t think I’ve got much choice. Harmony won’t speak to me and I’m letting all you guys down by not going back, aren’t I?”
“Don’t worry about me,” Steve told him, cutting up his breakfast efficiently. “I’ll be quite happy to spend Christmas Eve with my girlfriend, rather than working a private party. What about you boys?” He cut up a small piece of toast and speared that onto his fork with the bacon and egg while the others considered their positions.
Jack shook his head as if he didn’t want to commit, and Rob made an appreciative noise, which seemed to be more about the food than returning to Los Angeles.
Am I doing the right thing? Emery was conflicted, an emotion that was even harder to handle with a hangover. The problem was, he was obstinate. He didn’t want to lose face in front of the guys, or in front of Harmony. If he stayed he’d look like a loser who was being pushed around by his ex-girlf
riend. No, he wasn’t going to do that. Returning to LA was the only option now.
Five minutes later he rang Carmen and told her the news that he was heading back.
He could almost hear her approving sigh down the phone. “You’re doing the right thing, Emery. Call me when you touch down at LAX and I’ll come and collect you.” He didn’t want her to pick him up, instead preferring to go back to his place and be alone, but he didn’t object. Was it because he thought he’d need company, and someone to assuage his guilt? He wasn’t entirely sure he was doing the right thing, but he didn’t want to go down that track, did he? No, he’d made his decision, and now he’d have to live with the consequences. And the consequences, he knew, were that he’d never see Harmony again.
The cross-country flight back to LA wasn’t just physically exhausting, it was mentally draining as well. Although he was with his friends, Emery was emotionally checked out and even small talk with his buddies was more effort than he could bear. He sat reclining back in his seat for most of the flight, eyes closed, headphones on, cocooned in his own little world, trying not to think about Harmony. But she kept intruding on his thoughts. Worse, images of his own behavior kept flicking into his mind, making him sick with shame and embarrassment. He’d acted like an idiot, no worse, an arrogant, entitled moron. She was well rid of him, and she knew that, which is why she hadn’t returned his calls.
A couple of hours later the plane touched down in Los Angeles. He walked out to get his luggage, cramped from the hours on the plane, and happy to be on the ground again. Carmen had insisted on picking him up, so the first thing he did was text her. But she was already on her way, and ten minutes later she met him in the arrival’s hall, bouncing on the balls of her feet, a triumphant smile on her highly made-up face.
“Thanks for coming back, sweets.” Her wide smile was peppermint white, and her skin too healthily tanned, proving that winter in LA was nowhere near as cold as where he’d just come from. “I knew you’d come to your senses and not let me down.”