All I see in them is pain.
It knocks me for six and has me hesitating and shifting my weight.
“Do it,” he tells me.
“What?” I choke out, so shocked that he isn’t how I remembered him at all. All I see before me is weakness, pain and regret. Not the dominant, sadistic, nightmarish figure that’s been haunting me all these years.
“Shut the hell up,” my dad chides him.
Andrew shakes his head, his eyes not leaving mine. “It’s done, Sam.”
“You weak bastard. Get a grip. We’ve always survived and we’re damn well going to here as well.”
“The price was always too high,” Andrew tells him.
“We did what we had to do.”
“You did. I lost my family, because of you.”
“Because of Cartwright!”
“Because you wouldn’t risk yourself to help me—or your own daughter.”
That has me stepping back.
“What?”
“Keep your mouth shut!” my dad yells.
A shot fires, shocking me.
My dad screams and curses. Blood spurts from his left thigh.
I turn to see Dean with his gun trained on him. He nods at me. “Go on, gorgeous.”
Now my dad’s too preoccupied with the pain of that gunshot wound to interrupt.
“Tell me!” I demand of Andrew.
He looks down as he mumbles, “I didn’t want to hurt you. It made me sick. Disgusted with myself. I’m still disgusted by what he made me do to you.”
“He?” I ask. “Who?”
“Cartwright.”
Dean and I exchange a look of disbelief.
“No. You were working with him. He didn’t…force you.”
He shakes his head. “He forced me to…do what I did. He had my wife. He threatened to do all of that to her. He thought it would draw Sam out, that he’d come for you. I figured he would, too, and that it wouldn’t have to go too far. But—”
“He didn’t,” I finish for him.
“I’m so sorry, Alana. I never wanted—”
“Shut up!” I yell, my gun wavering wildly in my grasp, because I’m so distressed by what I’m hearing. “No! You’re lying! You’re a monster! A monster!” I scream rabidly. “There’s no gray here! Don’t…there’s no doubt. I’m gonna kill you! You deserve to die! All these years I’ve been looking for this opportunity…this moment to kill you. And I’m going to!”
“You should.”
“I will!”
“Good. I am a monster, Alana. The truth…the reasons behind what I did to you…it doesn’t take it away. I deserve to die for it. And you should be the one to do it. You need that closure.”
No! Why is he showing remorse? Why is he demonstrating humanity here? A soul?
This isn’t how it was supposed to be. It wasn’t supposed to go down like this. It was supposed to be black and white. He was supposed to be the monster I remember hurting me. There wasn’t supposed to be another level to it. It was meant to be straight down the line. Him being the monster and me pulling the trigger. Simple.
And then it would be over. It would all go away, once and for all.
“Alana,” Dean presses me.
He wants me to kill him.
That’s why he’s here. He and Damon are here to kill them both. And then to take Cartwright out as well.
Wait…Damon? Oh my God. With all this back and forth and the weight of the situation before me, I’ve failed to realize something major.
“Where’s Damon?”
“Dealing with the welcoming party outside,” Dean tells me.
“Maybe you should worry more about the man you love, rather than some crap that should all be ancient history, Alana,” my dad cuts in.
I glare at him. “Ancient history?” I fume.
“I thought you were better than this. Or, at least you should be after having the infamous Slasher as your teacher. A stone-cold killer. But you’re not. It’s highly disappointing, because your reputation is much better than the reality here. You’re overly emotional. You’re letting it control you, rather than focusing on the mission.” He scoffs and says with obvious disdain, “You’re behaving just a like a typical woman.”
Dean makes a move towards him, but I throw out my arm, holding him back.
I step up to my dad and crouch down in front of him.
“You know nothing about me. You never did. You never stuck around long enough to find out. And what’s more is you never wanted to.”
“Spare me this weakness, Alana.”
I shoot out my hand and dig my nails into the wound in his thigh.
He curses and grunts in pain.
“Mom died, because of you. Because of what you chose to get mixed up in. You let your best friend torture me for days. Rape me repeatedly. I was a teenager, just starting out my life then and instead of living it, I was begging him to kill me, to let me die. So, if you think something like that will ever be ancient history, you’re more of a fool than I took you for. No one can compartmentalize all of that, you asshole. And it twisted me. Dean helped me. It was exactly what I needed. But now…years later I’m finally at a point where I’m almost normal again. Almost healed after everything that’s happened to me, because of you. I can finally feel again, because of Damon and what we have to together.” I dig my fingers deeper and he throws his head back, roaring in agony. “And you have the nerve to criticize that? You have no fucking idea what it took for me to get here!”
I pull my hand away and get to my feet.
“None of what you just said changes anything. Is that what you expected, Alana? For me to admit that I was wrong? That I should have come for you and stopped Andrew? One lesson you seem to have failed to learn is that it’s always about protecting number one. Yourself. That’s exactly what I did. I protected myself. I learned that very early on in my line of work, in the world I live in. If I hadn’t, I would’ve ended up dead a long fucking time ago. It was all about survival. Plain and simple.”
“Christ, Sam,” I hear Andrew mutter at my dad’s cold-hearted speech.
“I didn’t expect anything from you, Dad. I just wanted you to know the real me, before the end.”
His brow furrows with confusion. “The end?”
I pull the trigger.
A bullet rips through his skull.
Instant kill.
Andrew’s eyes are wide with shock.
I feel Dean’s hand on my shoulder, squeezing gently, in a gesture of support.
The door flies open then and we both turn, our guns aimed that way.
It’s Damon.
His eyes are instantly drawn to my dead dad in the chair beside Andrew.
“Tell me you didn’t,” he says sadly. “Tell me it wasn’t you, Alana.”
Chapter 12
~Damon~
“Alana, tell me you didn’t kill.”
Even as I say the words, I know it was her. I can tell by that look in her eyes. Pained regret. The look that normal people have in their eyes after they’ve had to take a life to protect themselves, or something. Anyone who isn’t a cold-blooded killer has that same look in their eyes after taking a life.
These days, Alana’s one of those normal people. She isn’t the killer she used to be.
Pretty soon it won’t just be regret in her eyes. It’ll be guilt. A tidal wave of guilt will come crashing over her. And it’ll cripple her.
Aside from my concerns for her safety, that’s the main reason I didn’t want her on this fucking mission. I didn’t want her in a position where she’d even consider killing again, because I know what it’ll do to her now.
Fuck.
“He deserved to die, Damon,” she tells me, her voice desperate. Desperate for me to believe her reasoning. Desperate for her to believe it.
“Alana,” I say, shaking my head sadly.
“He was behind all of this! It’s his fault! Forest was just a puppet.”
I eye Andrew beh
ind her. “You told her?”
“You knew?” Alana snaps at me.
Dean scrubs his hand over his face. “Fuck. You and your secrets, Damon.”
“Yeah, I knew, Alana. I only just found out recently. And before you ask why I didn’t bring it up to you, I’ll remind you that we’re supposed to be walking away from all of this. We’re supposed to be putting it behind us.”
I watch her actually take my words in.
She blows out a breath and then she nods. “I…it was closure,” she tells me, gesturing to Sam.
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
“What about him?” I challenge, pointing to Andrew.
I see hesitation in her eyes and that’s when I know. She’s still out. The killer hasn’t been resurrected. She doesn’t want it. Sam was just closure to her.
“All right,” I say, reaching for her hand. “We’ll talk about it more later.” This is really not the time or place for us to get into any of this. But seeing her there with a gun in her hand…it’d thrown me through a loop and put me off mission for a minute or two.
She takes my hand and I pull her behind me. I discreetly nod to Dean over the top of her head.
Kill him.
He lifts his chin at me, letting me know he understands.
As I turn to leave with Alana, I stop in my tracks at the sound of Andrew’s voice.
“Make sure you stay out this time, Damon. Hold onto your humanity. And hers. Don’t end up twisted like us.”
“That’s the plan,” I say, over my shoulder.
I pull Alana through the door with me. Dean shuts it behind us.
I start towards the security door exit, the way we came in.
Alana pulls back on my hand. “Where are we going?”
“I’m getting you the hell out of here.”
Her eyes widen as she takes in the sight of all the dead or unconscious thugs sprawled out down the corridor. “Cartwright’s still alive. The mission isn’t complete.”
“It is for you.”
“Damon.”
“I can’t believe you fucking came here, Alana. After you swore to me you wouldn’t.”
“Did you really think I’d stay out of this? It’s dangerous. I wasn’t gonna leave you to—”
“You came here for vengeance. On Sam. On Andrew.”
“And to help all of you. You need me.”
“You’re pregnant. You’re done. I’m gonna get you up to Mark. He’s across the street on the roof of that abandoned apartment building. Stay with him while Dean and I get this done.”
She pulls her hand out of my grip.
“We do this together.”
Fuck. I don’t have time to argue this out with her.
She’s not showing any sign of backing down at all.
I look her over. She’s decked out in heavy-duty tactical gear. I peer closer at her vest. “Are you wearing two?”
She smiles. “Yep.”
“You aren’t usually—”
“What? This cautious? I didn’t want to take any chances with this little guy,” she says, rubbing her belly. “He’s well protected.”
That has me grinning. “He?”
“I’m hoping.”
Jesus. The look in her eyes has me softening. Dammit. She has such power over me.
I blow out a breath. “Fine, but you’re gonna have to follow my orders on this one. Can you do that?”
She nods. “Yes. Let’s end this.”
We turn back around and head to the other end of the corridor.
My hand is on the doorknob when I hear a shot fire. Dean.
I glance at Alana and see her grimace, realizing what I am.
Andrew Forest is dead.
A second later, Dean steps out of the room.
“Get things ready. We’re going after Cartwright. Meet us there,” I tell him.
“Got it.”
“Things? What things?” Alana asks as I pull her through the door with me.
I ignore her question, needing to concentrate on the immediate situation.
It’s dark where we are and it takes my eyes a moment to adjust to it.
After a few seconds, I’m able to make out what looks like a mess hall. Benches cover the room and there’s a kitchen at the far back.
“It’s empty,” she says.
“Let’s keep going,” I tell her, heading for another door over on the other side of the room.
“I hate going in blind,” she comments, because we have no fucking clue where Cartwright is within the compound right now.
“Me too. At least we know the layout, thanks to you and your contacts. Something, at least.”
We reach the door. It’s open. We both flatten our backs against the wall, either side of it. I peer inside first. I can’t see a fucking thing. It’s pitch black.
“Zero visibility,” Alana confirms as she has a look.
“It’s too risky,” I tell her.
“It’s the only way through to the rest of the compound. If we want to take Cartwright out, this is the way forward,” she points out.
Before I can respond, she bolts forward and walks through the doorway.
Fuck.
It forces me to rush in after her.
We’re a few feet in, trying to navigate our way in the dark, when I hear the door we just came through slam behind us.
The room floods with light.
We both bring our hands to our eyes as the sudden influx of brightness temporarily blinds us.
“Weapons down!”
I bring my hands down and blink hard. Cartwright is standing there in the mammoth lobby area, flanked by ten gun-toting guys. I glance over my shoulder to see another five behind us, blocking any chance of a retreat.
We’re trapped.
He makes a gesture and all his muscle cock their guns.
He commands again, “Weapons down. Now.”
Alana and I both slowly crouch down and place our weapons on the ground.
As we stand back up, Cartwright approaches us.
“So predictable, Damon.”
“What?”
“I knew you’d come to kill them. It’s why I kept them alive as long as I did, instead of killing them on site at that parking lot, like I’d wanted.” He smirks. “To draw you out.”
So, he did know we were coming then. This is a goddamn set up.
He eyes Alana. “And you, sweet thing,” he says, stepping closer to her.
I make a move to block his path to her, but all his guys take aim at me.
“Make another move and they’ll gun you down,” he tells me.
He steps up to Alana and grabs her chin hard, making her grunt.
My fists clench at my sides at him touching her. “Rob,” I growl.
He ignores me and he says to her, “I promised your boyfriend a great deal of pain for trying to double cross me. That fate would be a waste for such a beauty. What’s say you and I have a little fun together instead, after I’m finished with him?”
“Go to hell,” she spits at him.
“Mmm…the greater the defiance, the sweeter the submission, my sweet.” He eyes me. “Isn’t that right, Damon? I know all about your predilections.”
“It’s always consensual for both parties,” I hiss at him.
“Well, that’s where you and I differ then.”
“You aren’t fucking touching her!”
He slides his hand into her hair and fists it, jerking her head up to look at him. “You didn’t know? I’ve already had a bit of a taste.”
Alana’s eyes widen with disbelief. I see her dig her nails into her thighs to keep from reacting.
“When Forest was worn out doing what I’d ordered him to do with you,” he tells her, licking his lips at her and eyeing her with fierce hunger in his eyes.
She snaps then and goes to strike him. But he reacts quicker, catching her wrist. He holds it steady between them.
“Lower your hand, or I’ll snap your wris
t.”
She hesitates and he starts to push her hand back.
She relaxes her grip and he releases it.
“That’s better.” He eyes me. “I’d have thought you would’ve taught her better than this, Damon.”
He clearly thinks she’s my submissive, in the truest sense of the word, like a lot of the women I’ve had before her.
When I don’t say anything, he grabs her belt and tells me as he gazes at her, “No worries. I like a challenge.” He leans in and licks her neck like a fucking animal. I see her shudder and it rips right through me, knowing that I can’t do a fucking thing to stop him. If I make a move he’ll have his guys kill both of us in a split second. It’s making me sick to my stomach.
“I’ll rip your fucking dick off,” she growls at him.
Shit.
He snarls at her, incensed at her threat and her brazen disrespect to him in front of his guys.
His hand leaves her belt and wraps around her throat.
She gags as he chokes her.
“Stop! Stop, Rob!” I roar at him.
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
“Call me master,” he commands her.
Her eyes dart to mine and I see an apology there. I know why. Because there’s no fucking way she’s gonna do what he wants. She won’t give him her submission. She won’t give that to any man, except me; the only man she trusts completely. She’s going to let him choke her instead.
I won’t let this happen.
I start to move my hand really fucking slowly, so it’s not detectable to the assholes training their guns on us. I’m reaching for the grenade strapped to my tactical vest.
Detonating in such a small space, so fucking close-range is really dangerous. The result is going to be catastrophic. But as soon as I pull the pin and throw it, it’ll create enough of a distraction for me to cover Alana and get her the hell out of here. Not both of us, because I’ll have to hold the guys by the door off, so she can escape. But her and our baby are all I care about.
At least it’ll save her from having to be subjected to something so similar to the horrors she went through with Forest. I can’t let her go through anything like that ever again.
I’ll give my life to stop that from happening.
Whatever it takes to protect the woman I love.
“Say it, bitch!” he yells at her, shaking her as he continues to choke her.
Dark Hearts (Part 4) (The Bleeding Love Series) Page 7