“Wait until we’ve been married for twenty years, and then I expect none of them will revolve around me.”
“They will,” he said, catching hold of her hand and kissing it. “They always will.”
“We’ll see.” But she looked pleased at his words.
They rode the elevator down to Reception and then exited out into the late afternoon to find a dull and miserable day. The weather had closed in, and the streets looked gray and uninviting. His mind wandered back to Bear Bluff; it was the one place where he never minded the low clouds that came with the rain. It hung over the mountains, giving it a mystical feel.
In his youth, he and his friends would have played up on the higher slopes in this weather. Tag was particularly cool to play when the mist hid them from each other, and they could burst out of nowhere to make someone else “it.”
“Who’s driving?” she asked, taking the keys out of her purse.
“You can,” he said. “I’m beginning to miss the quiet back roads of Bear Bluff.”
“When you were in the Army, you must have visited some remote areas.” Skyla opened the car and helped him in before stowing the wheelchair; they knew the routine so well, the transition was smooth, and took little time.
Skyla slipped into the driver’s seat and started the engine, pulling out of the parking lot and heading for the hospital while he reminisced over the places he had been. “Very remote. On the whole. If the helicopter couldn’t land, we would be dropped in and left to fend for ourselves with what little supplies we could dump out without getting smashed up. I also worked in towns that had been flattened by war and earthquakes. Always our first priority was the people, clean water, shelter. These are the basic requirements wherever you are.”
“And when you walk again, would you go back to the Army?” she asked.
“I don’t think ahead like that. Not after the first couple of weeks. But no, I don’t think so. I made a difference, my crew made a difference, but now it’s time to move on.” He looked at the colorful stores as they drove into the center of the large sprawling town. “I like Dylan’s idea of helping young offenders. I like that a lot.”
“You would still have a purpose,” she said. “That is what a man like you needs.”
“A man like me.” He looked across to her and said, “A man like me has many needs.”
“I know.” She blushed and he guessed which need it was she was thinking of.
If only he could function properly, he was sure that same need would be top of the list of things to be thankful for.
Chapter Nineteen – Skyla
“Hey, Dad,” Skyla said, sitting in the seat next to her dad’s bed.
“Hi, Sky. Dorothy said you were here, that you’d been to see me earlier, but I was too out of it to remember.” He looked pale, and his voice was hoarse, but he sounded like his old self.
“She called me. I had to come.” Skyla held his hand, feeling the warmth and finding it comforting just as she had growing up, when his were the arms she ran to, and his was the voice that soothed. “She loves you so much.”
She frowned, her eyes stinging with tears she wanted to shed, but she didn’t want her dad to see her crying.
“I love her too.” Her dad patted her hand, then wiped the first tear that escaped her closed eyes. “And she says you found someone.”
“Yes. I have. Jordan, he’s one of my patients—well, used to be.”
“And it’s real?”
“Yes. It is. I think it’s given me an insight into what it’s like for you and Dorothy, and I want you to be happy. I really do.”
“I know you do.” He smiled, and brushed her hair back from her face. “My Sky, I will always love you with the fiercest love a man can have.”
More tears slipped down her face. “I know. I’ve learned that there are different kinds of love. Ours is one kind, and then there is the kind that makes your heart beat faster and your breath catch in your throat.”
“And there’s room in our hearts for both.” He smiled, looking relieved she finally got it, that she understood there was no competition, that she was never really excluded, but that her dad and Dorothy had their own relationship to nurture, and the nurturing was what took the time. They didn’t have the luxury of shifter bonds to tell them fate had stepped in and said this was how things were going to be.
“There is room for both. I hope that one day I’ll find room for a third kind of love, and know what it’s like to have a child.”
“Are you pregnant?” he asked hopefully. “Only I am more than ready to become a grandpa.”
“Not yet. But soon, I hope.”
The door opened and a doctor came in, “Mr. Martin, good news, everything looks normal, the oxygen in your blood is normal. Tomorrow we’ll do the checks again, and then you can go home.”
“Hear that, Dad?” Skyla asked, happy they were letting him go so soon.
“Yes. We’ll do a scan in the morning and if that looks good, then the best place to recuperate is home.”
“Thank you, Doctor,” her dad said brightly but as the doctor left, his face clouded with sadness.
“What’s wrong, Dad?” Skyla asked.
“Nothing. You’ll be able to return to your new life.”
“Ahh. I see what this is. Listen, Jordan has already said you can come and stay with us, and we will make regular trips to see you and Dorothy. I’m all grown up; it won’t be like before.”
“So when can I meet this man of yours?” Her dad looked happier. “Is it to be wedding bells?”
“One day, I’m in no rush.” She thought of Jordan’s proposal but decided to keep it to herself until it was more official. “He’s taken Dorothy home. He said he’d wait with her while she showers and changes and has a rest. They’ll be back in the next hour or so. It was all we could do to persuade Dorothy to leave.”
“I can’t wait to be home. She makes the best chicken soup,” her dad confided.
“It’s about time you had someone to look after you,” Skyla said. “All the years you were the only one in the house to do everything.” She leaned forward and hugged her dad. “I don’t think I ever said thank you enough.”
He placed his hand on her head. “Just seeing your happy face every day was the best reward, Sky. I mean that. It means the world to me that we’ll see more of you.”
“Sorry, Dad,” she said, her throat constricting as tears threatened again.
“You don’t have to be. We handle things our own ways, and you needed to go off and spread your wings and learn about the world and how you fit into it.”
“I got lucky to have such a wise dad,” Skyla said.
“And that man of yours got lucky to have my daughter in his life.”
“I’ll make sure to tell him that,” she said. Sitting up, she took in the handful of other patients on the ward. The nurses were always checking instruments and charts; she wanted to thank each and every one of them for doing their job, but most of all she wanted her dad out of there, and home again with his beloved Dorothy.
***
“Thank you for taking Dorothy home.” They were in the elevator, heading back to their room, and she was exhausted. It was past midnight and she wanted to fall into bed.
“It’s OK, she needed the ride, must have been scary for her traveling in the back of the ambulance while they tried to stabilize your dad.”
“She’s a strong woman, though, isn’t she?” Skyla had got to know her stepmom more in the last twenty-four hours than she had in the all the rest of the time she’d known her.
“What did you expect?” Jordan asked, taking her hand. “Look how your dad has raised you. Did you think that he would go for a woman completely different than you?”
“I never thought about it. I just saw the woman who was taking my dad away.” She wanted to flop down on the floor and sleep. She didn’t care if she made it to her bed or not. “I was childish and unfair.”
“Well, when they come to visit
, you can make it up to her.”
“I hope so. I hope we can be a close family again.”
“Is that a hint?”
“About what?” she asked, confused.
“About me and my family.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I am much too tired to think in any kind of subtle-hint way.”
He pulled her to him and sat her on his lap. “There, it’s the closest to a knight in shining armor on a white horse I’m ever going to get.”
“I’ll take it,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re OK about us going home tomorrow?” he asked.
“Yes, I said we’d pop in to see Dad in the morning, and then we’ll go home. Your new motorized wheelchair is arriving and so is the gym equipment. Anyway, now the emergency is over, and Dad is feeling back to his normal self, he’ll be fine, with Dorothy there for him.”
“And you can come back and visit in a couple of days. I think you can trust me home alone.”
“Oh, I’m not sure about that, who knows what mischief you’ll get up to?”
“Dylan or Ben will keep an eye on me.”
“And am I supposed to trust them?”
“Yes. We’re all old mated men. Soon to be all married men. I feel the need to ask your dad for your hand in marriage.”
She burst out laughing. “It’s not his to give. Anyway, you already asked. No returns.”
“I’d never return you.”
The elevator opened and he wheeled them both along the corridor, and to their room. She should have offered to walk, but she was too tired to move. Once inside, they both quickly changed and she dragged herself into bed. As she fell into a deep exhausted sleep, she heard him say he loved her. She hoped he heard when she murmured it back to him, but by then it might have been a dream.
Chapter Twenty – Jordan
“I thought you wanted to get home quickly,” Skyla asked him as they entered Bear Bluff and he steered the car up along the northern ridge instead of driving towards their home.
“I wanted to get back to Bear Bluff.” He was being cryptic, he knew that, but he didn’t want to get her hopes up too high. He didn’t want to get his own hopes too high either, but he guessed it was too late for that.
“Care to tell me where we are going?” she asked.
“Dylan’s place.”
“Any particular reason. Is it about the job?” she asked.
Jordan had called ahead to check Dylan was in. He was. It had taken all his restraint to drive home slowly, when he wanted to get here faster than the speed limit would allow. Now they were so close, he almost felt like turning the car around and going back to his house, and leaving himself with the glimmer of hope his idea had spawned.
If this didn’t work, he would be back to square one. Back to nowhere, with no bear.
“It’s not about the job,” he admitted as he turned into the drive he had cycled up many times as a kid when he sometimes hung out with Dylan. That was before they grew up and Dylan ended up in juvie.
Jordan was surprised the place looked the same, or at least Dylan’s grandpa’s place looked the same. As they wound their way up the road, a larger house came into view, from where it snuggled in amongst the trees.
“Oh my,” Skyla said. “That is a beautiful house.”
“It gives me some ideas,” Jordan said.
“I bet it does.” He stopped the car and Skyla got out, going to fetch the wheelchair while Jordan waited impatiently. He knew she was going as fast as she could, but she didn’t know the urgency that was filling him now, the sense that this was right, that he had discovered a way to find his bear.
“I thought I heard the car,” Dylan called as he came out of his house. “What can I do for you? Is your father all right, Skyla?”
“Yes, thanks,” Skyla answered. “As for what you can do for us, I have no idea.”
“I wanted your help, with something. A kind of experiment.” Now he was here, with Skyla and Dylan, his plan seemed so ridiculous. What if he was wrong, what if he messed up and something terrible happened. What if he never really moved his ankle, as he thought he had?
“Jordan,” Skyla said, “whatever it is, please tell us.”
“My dreams have changed. It’s no longer me looking for my bear, I see my bear looking for me.”
“So you can at least see him?” Dylan asked, sounding excited.
“I’m not sure if I see him, or feel him. But I’m sure he’s close. It’s as if the longer I spend with Skyla, the more he comes to me.” Jordan felt like an idiot saying that, but it was true.
“The mating bond is strong; it could be enough. Like bait,” Dylan agreed thoughtfully.
“And I’m hoping it’s all tied in with me not being able to walk.” There, he’d said it, for better or worse. He was sure, no, not sure, but so incredibly hopeful that if he could find his bear, it would trigger his ability to walk again.
“Wait, are you sure?” Dylan asked. “I can’t see the connection.”
“I know.” Jordan looked at Skyla. “I didn’t tell you, but I’m sure I moved my ankle. I mean, it may have been my imagination. No, I’m sure it wasn’t.” He felt so uncertain, and for a man who had always been certain of everything, always confident in himself and his abilities, this was hard to admit.
Skyla went pale. “You moved your ankle. You felt it?”
“Yes. The night you got the call, you were so upset and I wanted to get to you, to hold you, I was certain. But I haven’t been able to repeat it, so now I don’t know.”
“I saw you move your legs,” she admitted, her face almost white in the dimming evening light.
“What! Why didn’t you say?” he growled, unable to understand why she would keep this information to herself.
“It was while you were having a nightmare, the first night. Your legs were thrashing about. It gave me hope, but I didn’t think you would believe me, and you were already caught up in the thought that the doctors thought you were lying about not being able to move.”
He let out a breath. “They might be right. It is all in my head.”
“Then let’s get it out,” Dylan said, coming to stand by Jordan. “I think I know what you need me to do.”
“What? What do you need him to do?” Skyla asked, her tone uneasy. “Can you explain it please?”
“It’s hard to explain.” Jordan nodded to Dylan. “But you think it will work, don’t you?”
“I think it might reset your link.” Dylan was thoughtful for a moment. “Did you die?”
“What?” Jordan asked.
“Did you stop breathing? It’s just a thought, that for some reason you became disconnected.”
“I don’t know. Local villagers took me in until a medevac team arrived.”
“I may be wrong; it might be that you took a hard-enough hit to your back that the link became disrupted.”
“Dylan, stop trying to piece it together, let’s just see if it works,” Jordan asked, knowing he had reached some invisible point of no return.
“How do you want to do this? I could hold you in my arms. Or are we only at a hand-holding phase?”
“Hand-holding.” Jordan looked up at Dylan. “You sure you want to risk this? What if us doing this together disrupts things?”
“You mean what happens if we both end up in my bear’s body?” Dylan shook his head. “One time I shifted while fighting with some kid from town. Tommy Keller. We never got mixed up; I don’t think it works like that. Hell of a static shock, though.”
“Just get it over with,” Skyla said, her hands to her face, as if she wanted to cover her eyes and not watch.
Dylan took another step forward, held out his hand, and asked, “Ready?”
Before Jordan had a chance to answer, he felt a sharp jolt as they touched; the air filled with static electricity, and Dylan began to shimmer. It spread outwards, consuming Jordan with a sensation he had been unable to replicate on his own, but now f
elt as natural as the breath in his body.
The world around him fell away, and for a split moment there was nothing. On the threshold where he would normally meet his bear and exchange places with him, there was nothing. Panic filled him. Would he be able to find his way back to the other world? Or would he be stuck on the wrong side of things, with no part of him in the real physical world?
Then the touch of familiar fur brushed against the inside of his mind, and his bear was there, surging forward, leaping through the air, and into the world where their mate stood waiting. Jordan relaxed, he had found his bear, and his bear could use his legs. His fear of finding his bear had often been obliterated by the fear of finding his bear was paralyzed too, that this beautiful creature would never be able to run across the mountain, or swim in the river.
“Oh shit!” Skyla’s voice called him back to the real world, only this time he was in his bear’s head, he was letting their mate run her fingers through his thick black fur, while his bear shivered in appreciation.
His bear was back. His bear was whole.
Jordan turned to see the other bear, Dylan, watching from a safe distance, and part of Jordan wanted to run at the big grizzly, and bite his legs, challenging him to a chase through the mountain paths. But this wasn’t the time. His experiment today wasn’t through.
Pulling himself away from Skyla, he moved a safe distance away, and then let the air shimmer around him. He was coming back as a man, but would he be a man who could walk?
The change was sudden, his legs buckled under him and he fell to the ground. Skyla screamed and rushed towards him. “Jordan, are you OK?” She knelt beside him, and lifted his head to rest on her lap.
“It doesn’t matter that it didn’t work, we can still keep trying to find other ways. I love you as you are. At least you have your bear.”
Tears were coming down her cheeks, and he wiped them away before lifting his head and kissing her. “I needed to hear that,” he said. “But I think I’m going to be OK. I need to build my muscle strength back up, and I feel as weak as a baby. But I can feel my legs.” He shifted his weight. “I can move my legs.”
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