Heart of the Pack

by Kristen Banet

  “I would say you’re a little secretive,” Chris laughed. “I can smell a female all over this, a doe. No rumors or anything about it though.”

  “Stop changing the fucking topic,” James snapped. It made both Alphas look over to him. “She’s none of your fucking business.”

  “Someone grew a fucking backbone.” Chris growled. “Little brother, you need to put him in his place.”

  “He’s right. She’s not your business,” Thomas said before taking a swig of his beer. “Why are you here?”

  “I need a place to hang out for a few weeks, maybe longer,” Chris answered. “No big deal. I just need a bed.”

  “Are you bringing trouble into this town?” Thomas asked, this time sounding angry. James felt his own anger build. They could lose all of this if Chris brought in some drama. The Pride wouldn’t tolerate it, and neither would the Colorado Pack.

  “No,” Chris laughed. “No trouble. Just tired. Been traveling a lot. Figuring my shit out. Trying to find what I can do, talking to old allies. Just need a break.”

  James reminded himself that he didn’t trust Chris at all, but he couldn’t smell a lie in the statement. He was also feeling bitter about this Alpha for more shit than anyone in the room would want to talk about.

  “We’ll set you up in a hotel,” Thomas sighed. “Come on. I know a good place.”

  “A hotel?” Chris looked insulted. “Why can’t I stay here?”

  “We’re crowded as is,” James called out. “Three wolves call this place home.”

  “There’s four bedrooms,” Chris huffed, glaring at him. He looked back at Thomas and James already knew what he was about to do. Play the damn older brother card. “I’m your older brother, Thomas. You can’t just shove me into a hotel.”

  Thomas took a deep breath and James groaned, rubbing his face again. He was going to fall for it. Like he always fell for it. Thomas looked over to James and James just shrugged. James was a wolf and he would do as his Alpha wanted.

  “What’s on your mind, James?” his Alpha asked softly, ignoring Chris for a moment.

  “Abigail,” James answered back, just as quietly.

  “Chris, you’re staying in a hotel,” Thomas said decisively, and James felt a swell of pride and respect for him at that moment.

  “Come on!” Chris groaned.

  “End of story,” Thomas said with finality. “Sorry, this house is full.”

  “Full of three wolves and a woman named Abigail?” Chris growled. “When did some bitch become more important than brotherhood?”

  James snarled, and Thomas grabbed Chris’ shirt and swung him into the wall. James stayed seated, barely, when he realized Thomas was going to handle it.

  “You’ve been here less than an hour and you can’t keep your damn shit to yourself. You don’t talk about Abigail that fucking way, you hear me?” Thomas snarled. “You’ll take the fucking hotel. I’m fucking paying for it. You’ll only come to this house with my fucking permission.”

  James grinned and noticed Chris glaring at him for it. Damn right, Abigail was more important than this son of a bitch.

  “Got something to fucking say, James?” Chris growled, still held to the wall by Thomas.

  “Nah, Chris, I don’t,” James chuckled.

  “Don’t pick fights, you two,” Thomas snapped. “Come on, Chris.”

  James watched Thomas take his brother out of the house and stayed where he was. He hated that motherfucker with every bone in his body. Chris just walked in here and pretended like none of it ever happened. Like everything would be fine between them all. He’d always been a shit Alpha for South Dakota, with the rest of them cleaning up after him. It had been his idea to go and raid the hunters’ little place and take a bunch of them out.

  James slid off the counter and went out to his truck again. He drove it to the small section of the property where five small headstones were lined up. Names of the fallen. Pelts in the ground.

  Chris hadn’t even asked if they ever got their brothers back. He had no idea half of his old inner circle was buried out here, only minutes away. James knelt in front of them and lowered his head.

  They were good at pretending it never happened. That these brothers fell to real fights, honored. James was willing to ignore that four of them had been on Chris’ side about the hunters. In the end, they were all wolves and a wolf either followed the Alpha or fought him.

  In the end, they had all followed and they had paid for it.

  Now that motherfucker was back, and James was concerned with the implications that had for the Pack. He wouldn’t sit by if Chris tried to take over. He had some hope for Thomas, who was willing to throw Chris out of the house over calling Abigail ‘some bitch.’ That meant Thomas, knowingly or unknowingly, found something he cared for more than his last family member. Thank God for that.

  James pulled out his phone to let Antonio know what happened.

  James: Chris is back. Was here at the house. Thomas is putting him in a hotel.

  Tony: What the fuck?! This is a fucking joke, right?

  James: Sadly, no. He was standing on the front porch when I got here. Wanted to stay at the house. Thomas. Hotel. Thank god.

  Tony: What the hell does he want?

  James: Not really sure. Just said something about wanting to relax for a little while?

  Tony: Jesus fucking Christ, James. He’s a whole bag of fucking problems we don’t need.

  James: I know. I’m already thinking about how to make sure Thomas doesn’t fall for his shit. It’s his brother, though.

  Tony: I’m not fucking serving Chris again. If Thomas bends, I’m fucking outta here.

  Tony: Where you at, man?

  James: With our brothers. Just needed to remind myself why Chris is bad news. He didn’t even fucking ask about them, ya know? Pretended like everything was normal and it was just on with business and shit.

  Tony: Come to the bar and hang out. Play some guitar. I’ll even sing. We’ll have a good time, call Abby over or something when she’s done with Finn at the Pride’s place. No reason to worry about Chris until he actually does something wrong, I guess.

  James liked that idea. The band wouldn’t mind him taking the stage for a moment and just playing for the crowd a little. He shoved his phone back into his pocket and went back to the house. He needed to clean up and change if he was going out into public.

  6

  Abigail

  Abigail walked into the bar later than she thought she would. It was past dinnertime and people were already starting to fill the place, off work and ready to relax. It was quieter than it had been over the winter, but Rocker’s had this energy to it that none of the other bars in town did, which brought in the rowdier locals.

  She looked over the bar and chuckled. They had the new motto up over it now: howl at the moon. The locals didn’t know wolves ran their favorite bar, but it was a quiet homage to the Pack. It had been her idea and worked for a rock bar like this one at the same time as it gave her wolves something of their own, a real claim on the place.

  “Looking over your handiwork?” Thomas asked from the behind the bar.

  “I am,” Abigail laughed. “You didn’t have to use it.”

  “It would have been up sooner, but custom signage like that takes time,” Thomas chuckled. “What can I get you?”

  “Playing bartender today, I see,” Abigail ran a hand over the bar. Thomas gave her a small smile and waited. “Going to get me drunk and talk all about my problems?”

  “I like getting you tipsy and talking about nothing at all much more,” Thomas teased.

  “Just a water would be nice for now,” Abigail answered finally, smiling back at him. “Why are you behind the bar?”

  “I need to do something, anything,” Thomas sighed. “Get away from the paperwork. Plus, I don’t take any of the tips, so Johnny has no problem with it.”

  “Where’s James and Antonio?” She tilted her head and looked around as Thomas slid t
he water towards her. She picked it up and sipped on it as she searched for her other wolves.

  “They’re getting ready to go up and perform,” Thomas informed her. She raised her eyebrows at him, her heart going faster.

  “James is going to play?”

  “Antonio will be singing as well,” Thomas finished, nodding.

  She looked back to the stage, two stools on it, ready for James and Antonio. This was going to be a great day, then. She loved listening to them. It reminded her of campfires and dancing with Thomas and dark, starry nights. They didn’t play often, and she wanted them to play more. Having them play here? In public like this?

  This was a dream of hers for them. Something that had nothing to do with hunters or their lost friends. They never talked about it, but she saw it in their eyes sometimes. The very few nights one would wake up shaking, panting in fear, sweating with eyes full of nightmares. The way they would all cuddle to get back to sleep. Twice for Antonio. Once for Thomas. Four times for James.

  “How was Finn today?”

  Abigail jumped and looked behind her again. Thomas was no longer behind the bar. He was sitting down on a barstool next to her and guiding her to sit down as well. She sighed and shook her head. “Angry,” she groaned. “He was mad we dragged him out. Gabe and Troy ended up with us on the run as well, to keep an eye on Riley. She, in turn, decided that Finn was beautiful, grabbed her camera and now he’ll be a member of the gallery opening. Rather, a subject.”

  “Riley can’t stop herself from painting,” Thomas chuckled then sobered. “Finn…angry is better than depressed?”

  “It can be,” Abigail agreed softly. “It’s something. Anger can drive someone to be productive. It’s also a natural stage of grief. He’s moving forward, slowly. He’ll backslide a few times, but I think forcing him to interact with the world is a good way to move him forward a little. He can’t keep hiding.”

  “We’ll make sure he doesn’t,” Thomas told her, leaning her into him. “Abigail…I have some news that might change things.”

  “Let’s hear it,” Abigail sighed. She didn’t like the sound of that at all.

  “Chris is back in town,” Thomas whispered. “I don’t know why. He says he just wants a break from shit but…” Thomas trailed off, and she heard the implication. He didn’t trust him.

  “Well.” She took a deep breath before continuing. “That’s not what I was expecting.”

  Chris Marek was in town? She wondered how this was going to mess with everything. Their peaceful paradise was already drawing to a close with Brenton’s decision, and now Chris? The world was creeping in and reminding her every second that there were other things to deal with.

  “James found him at the house. I put him up in a hotel. Not the same one as you. I don’t want you and him mixing. I hope you understand,” Thomas said, running his fingers through the ends of her hair.

  “I do.” Abigail understood well enough. This was his family and while she was technically a Pack member, she wasn’t family. There was a boundary there. She was temporary, and it was what she wanted. She said she would try. Privately. Thomas was just trying to maintain that distance, of course.

  She ignored the pain that came from the thought.

  “He knows of you, but not really much of anything,” Thomas continued. “He could smell you in the house. I didn’t give him any more information about our…thing.”

  “It’s your decision,” she mumbled, nodding slowly. She didn’t look at him. She could smell the concern and worry coming off him. She could hear his heart racing and ignored it. “I mean…I’m looking at a job hunt soon. I’ll be gone by summer. You don’t need to get Chris all worked up over me or vice versa.”

  “Abigail…” Thomas growled softly. “We’ll always be Pack.”

  “You and Chris? Of course. He’s your brother,” Abigail laughed weakly. She didn’t need Thomas to remind her of that.

  “No,” he bit out. “Me and you. You, James, and Antonio. We’ll always be Pack. Just because you’re going to leave doesn’t mean that changes.”

  It would change everything. Abigail knew it. She would leave, and they would meet someone else, maybe even each get a woman of their own. She would go career chasing and when she returned, everything would be different.

  She was just putting off the inevitable - and she would keep putting it off. She liked what she had in the moment. His words felt good, though. Like this was more than a temporary fling for them.

  “I’m sorry,” Thomas groaned. “This is a complicated conversation to have in the middle of the bar.”

  “We’ll talk about it when it’s quieter,” Abigail agreed softly. She felt the need to clarify something, though, before they dropped it. “Thomas, I don’t want to intrude on your personal life. What’s going on with you, the guys, and Chris…if you don’t want me to be a part of it, I won’t be. We’re not even in a real relationship.”

  “Real…” Thomas closed his mouth suddenly and then looked away. When he looked back, he was frustrated and hurt. Abigail didn’t understand what she’d said wrong. “What’s not real about this?”

  “I mean,” Abigail groaned, shaking her head. “We’re not dating. We’re hanging out.” She dropped her voice, to keep their privacy. “We’re sleeping together. We’re friends, certainly. But it’s not like you’re my boyfriend, Thomas. Or James or Antonio. You don’t owe me anything.”

  “Ah,” Thomas nodded once and stood up. “I understand now.”

  “Thomas,” Abigail sighed.

  “I’m not mad, Abigail. You’re right. We never really made any decisions like that.” Thomas swooped down and kissed her cheek before walking away. She watched him go to the back, confused and hurting. She’d only stated the truth.

  Why did it hurt so bad?

  She sipped on her water for what felt like a long time, finally ordering a Cosmo from Johnny when the water wasn’t cutting it. Forty years old and she still didn’t know her way around relationships. Lying was bad, but telling the truth hurt. She figured she was just never going to work out these things.

  She just finished her drink and ordered another one, sitting at the bar alone. She pulled out her phone and texted Riley, finally deciding to lean on another girl for this.

  Abigail: I think I messed it all up.

  Riley: Let’s hear it.

  Abigail: I told Thomas that we weren’t a real relationship. We’re not exactly going on dates or anything, ya know? We just have sex and hang out. He’s dealing with Chris coming back into town and I wanted him to know it was okay that I wasn’t involved or a part of his family issues since we’re not beholden to each other.

  Riley: Oh, for fuck’s sake, Abigail.

  Abigail: What did I do? I’m not their girlfriend, Riley.

  Riley: That doesn’t make it not real. I spent over six months with my guys before we ever decided to put a name to it. Being undefined doesn’t make it less real.

  Abigail read that nearly a dozen times, realizing Riley was so right. She was completely right. How did this young cheetah, not even twenty-five, have this so easily figured out?

  Riley: Here’s something to think about. Would you be okay with them meeting other women right now? Or would they be okay with you meeting other guys?

  Abigail: No…

  Riley: Then it’s fucking real. Get your damn head outta your ass. You might not have words to it, Abigail, but it’s committed, whether you meant for it to be that way or not.

  Abigail: I’m about to go job hunting. I could be leaving soon. My job takes me everywhere.

  Riley: Long distance is a thing, dummy. Or you can use Wild Junction as home when you aren’t traveling, instead of that LA condo of yours. You know, the one you haven’t been to in months and ignore now since we both know you don’t want to go back to the smog of LA.

  Abigail: I sometimes hate how much you notice.

  Riley: I’m pretty good at it. The boys hate it, too. I tend to notice whenever they are
feeling down and shit.

  Abigail: What do I do?

  Riley: Put a name on it, Abigail. I think it’s time you put a name to this. You don’t need to tell me anymore. You don’t need to make it public. I just think you and those wolves need to put a name on it for you. You’re the therapist here. Figure it out.

  Abigail laughed, taking a sip of her drink. Everyone said that. She shouldn’t have problems because she was a doctor for these types of things. She actually wasn’t, though. She had never been good at this sort of issue for her patients. She would always refer them to a different specialist. Her specialty wasn’t the heart.

  Abigail: Ha. Ha. It’s easier with patients, ya know? I’m not a part of the situation. And I do trauma counseling mostly, along with mental illness in association, not…couple’s therapy. Poly therapy? Relationship counseling? One of those.

  Riley: Cute. Look, I’m here for you, whatever you decide. My advice is: If you want to keep this, you need to realize it’s real and not just some extended one-night stand with a fuck-buddy…or three. (I won’t judge, I have five). If you don’t, you need to make that clear to them or they might expect more from you than you’re willing to give.

  Abigail: Thanks. That makes this seem much easier. Seriously.

  Riley: I know there’s a lot going on for you, but those things…they are just things. The wolves? They aren’t just things and you need to remember that. They need a higher priority from you than the things.

  Abigail: You make a good best friend, you know that?

  Riley: Damn right, I do. Plus, I’ve done what you’ve done already. At least you aren’t freaking out that there’s more than one of them.

  Abigail: I’ve never really thought of them as anything other than the unit. They are all different and unique but they…seemed packaged. Like one for all and all for one. Plus, seeing you and your guys? That makes it easier. I’m not alone in having multiple men to deal with. Seems like less of a social issue here. How did you get started?