“Admire me?” Brianna’s face radiated a mix of emotions, disbelief coupled with revulsion. “You admire me for this?” She swept her hands out to encompass the walls.
Before anyone could stop her, she began to tear at the pictures, pulling them off the wall and ripping them in half. Stunned, nobody moved to stop her as she worked more and more frantically, destroying the pictures as tears coursed down her cheeks.
“This is just Saturday night in Hollywood. Don’t admire me for this,” she cried. “This isn’t who I am or what I do.”
It was finally Troy who grabbed her in his arms and held her. She fought him, struggling to get out of his embrace, but he held tight, refusing to let her go.
She looked up at him, frustration shining from her tear-filled eyes. “It’s just Saturday night, not the rest of the days of the week,” she said as she stopped struggling.
“I know,” he replied. Aware that the fight had left her, he dropped his arms from around her.
Brianna pushed past Troy and walked to Sandy. “It’s all right. I understand.”
“I didn’t mean any harm. I promise I wouldn’t ever do anything to hurt you,” Sandy exclaimed.
“Sandy, if you’re going to admire me, do it because I’m nice to people or because I’m passionate about animals. But don’t admire me because I get dressed up and somebody takes pictures of me,” Brianna said.
She looked at Troy. “Let’s go home. I don’t think they’ll find anything here.” She didn’t wait for his response but turned and left the room, her shoulders slumped in utter defeat.
Troy followed behind her, a simmering anger building up inside him. He had no idea what had provoked it, wasn’t sure where it was directed, but it remained thick in his chest as he and Brianna got back into her vehicle.
They didn’t speak for the first five minutes of the drive back to the safe house. Troy tightly gripped the steering wheel as a building pressure grew inside him.
He tried to seek the source, wondered if it was a residual sentiment from the unexpected surge of jealousy he’d experienced earlier concerning Kent.
Or maybe it was seeing all those photographs of Brianna plastered all over Sandy’s walls. In all probability Sandy’s obsession with the famous Bree Waverly was probably benign, but he couldn’t help but wonder how many other creeps might have developed similar, less innocent kinds of obsessions with her.
“That was more than a little creepy,” Troy said.
“She wouldn’t hurt anybody. I always knew she kind of had a girl crush on me. Poor Sandy,” she said. “I hope she doesn’t quit over all this. She’s great with the animals and the bookkeeping, and she’s such a sweet girl.”
“That’s all you’re worried about? That she might quit?” he asked. He was feeling dangerously on edge, teetering on a precipice of sheer emotion.
“Well, of course that’s not all I’m worried about,” she exclaimed.
“What you should be worried about is how many other creeps have your pictures up on their walls. You put yourself out there, dressed in skimpy outfits and dripping sex appeal, then throw up your hands in surprise when you become the victim of a stalker or a nut.”
“It’s not like I’m the only woman in Hollywood making the tabloids,” she said.
“No, but you’re the only one I’ve made love with. You’re the only one I care about.” He tightened his lips together and clutched the steering wheel.
Dammit, he hadn’t meant to say that. He felt her staring at him as he pulled up and parked in front of the safe house. “It’s my job to keep you safe,” he said as if she’d asked for an explanation. “But your lifestyle and past actions are making this more difficult.”
“Don’t you dare try to make this my fault, Troy,” she said as she got out of the car. She slammed the car door with more force than necessary.
Troy followed her up to the porch, knowing he’d made her angry and welcoming this new tension between them. He needed some distance, from her and from the situation.
Things were spiraling out of control and he hated the feeling of helplessness that filled him. She was making him crazy; he wanted her and he hated it because he was afraid for her and for her father.
As he unlocked the door, she swept in before him and went right to her bedroom where she slammed the door shut with enough force to shake the windows in their frames.
He threw himself on the sofa and hoped she’d stay in her bedroom for the next ten years. He didn’t know why she was so deep under his skin at the moment, but she was and he just needed her to stay away from him for a little while.
She exited the bedroom only to stomp into the bathroom, and a moment later he heard the sound of the water running in the shower.
He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. Instantly his mind created a vision of her standing naked beneath a steamy spray with her hair slicked back to display her high cheekbones, that perfect nose and those lush lips.
It was at that moment he recognized the source of his anger. It was born of desire. He wanted her again, and he hated himself for it. He’d lost all his objectivity where she was concerned. It was messing with his mind on a personal level, and it was screwing him up on a professional level.
He no longer knew if the threat to her came from the way she’d lived her life in California or the way her father had conducted business. He didn’t know if it was an old boyfriend or a community activist. She’d scrambled his mind to a point that he didn’t know which end was up anymore.
He tensed as the sound of the shower water went off. Maybe she’d go back in the bedroom, he thought. Of course, she didn’t do what he wanted, but instead marched back into the living room and faced him.
Clad only in her pale pink robe and a self-righteous anger, she looked glorious. “You’re a fine one to talk about personal choices and lifestyles, Troy Sinclair,” she exclaimed.
He narrowed his eyes and stood. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the fact that you’re thirty-five years old and not married because you have some fantasy woman in your mind. Maybe the real reason you’re still alone is because you’re afraid of having a real relationship with a real woman.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” he scoffed. “Besides, you’re almost thirty and I don’t see a significant other in your life.”
She flushed but raised her chin even higher. “At least I don’t have some crazy fantasy in my head that will be impossible to find. All I want is a man who will love the fact that I like animals and designer high heels, who will accept that I sometimes made mistakes in my past. I want a man who will love me despite the fact that I’m complex and can be difficult.”
She stopped and drew in a deep breath, her forehead wrinkling with perplexity. “Why are we fighting?”
Troy sat back on the sofa, some of the tension ebbing out of him. “I’m not sure. Maybe as a stress reliever.”
“There’s got to be a better way to release stress,” she replied and sat next to him.
Troy could definitely think of a better way, but making love with her again would only complicate things further.
“This can’t go on,” she said softly. She leaned her head against the back of the sofa cushion. “You need to get back to your real life, and I need to get out of your hair. My suggestion is first thing tomorrow morning you take me home. I’ll be safe there.” She reached over and covered Troy’s hand with hers. “You’ve done your job, Troy. It wasn’t supposed to be a lifetime assignment. It was just supposed to be a couple of days.”
He’d just been thinking he needed to distance himself from her and she was giving him the perfect opening. He could walk away from her and this assignment with no harm, no foul. So why did the very idea make his heart feel heavy?
BRIANNA STARED AT TROY’S elegant features, the blond buzz-cut hair that looked stiff yet was soft beneath her touch, the slate gray eyes that could be warm and welcoming or icy with contempt.
Why burden him with her feelings when she knew, had always known, that she wasn’t the woman he wanted to spend his life with, wasn’t even close to the fantasy woman he held in his mind?
“Why would you want to go back home?” he asked. “Wouldn’t it bother you to be there with Heather? She hasn’t been ruled out as a suspect.”
“The more I think about it, the less I think Heather had anything to do with Dad’s disappearance. For one thing, I’m not sure she’s smart enough to pull off something like this.” Besides, being with Heather would certainly be easier than being here with Troy, she thought.
“Look, today has been an emotional roller coaster,” he said. “The high of the adoption celebration, the drama of thinking you might find your dad—maybe we should wait until morning before we make any decisions about where we go from here.”
She knew he was probably right, that her emotions were crazy right now, because all she really wanted was for him to sweep her up in his arms and carry her into his bedroom and make love to her until dawn.
“I’m sure your family misses you,” she replied.
He smiled, a tired gesture that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “My family is used to me disappearing for days at a time.”
She curled her legs up beneath her. “I used to call my dad every Sunday from California.”
“It must have been hard on you, when your father married Heather.”
Brianna frowned thoughtfully. “Yes and no. It had been just Dad and me for a long time, but as I got older, I knew Dad was lonely. I was actually happy when he married Heather. I liked the idea of him having somebody to share his life with, somebody who would be with him as he grew old.”
The tension that had been in the air between them since they’d returned to the house was gone, and instead she felt just a quiet weariness, a knowledge that it was time for the two of them to part ways, before her heart got any more tangled on a path that could only lead to heartache. And she was afraid that there was already a wealth of heartache for her to face.
The hope she’d been able to maintain about her father still being alive could no longer find purchase inside her. But she didn’t want to think about that now, couldn’t stand facing what might be ahead.
“Talk to me about your life, Troy. Tell me what movies you like, what you enjoy doing on Saturday nights.” She heard the quiet desperation in her voice.
He must have heard it too, and understood her need to be taken away from the drama, from the horror of what had become her life.
He spent the next hour telling her stories about his childhood and his three sisters. He made her laugh and in those moments she fell in love with him just a little bit more.
“What about you?” he asked. “What was your life like in California? When you were ripping those pictures off Sandy’s walls, you said that they just depicted one night of the week, not the rest of the days and nights.”
She smiled. “You’d be surprised by how normal it was. I spent a lot of my days contacting people about Precious Pets, getting promises for donations and such. On Tuesday and Thursday nights, I went to a Pilates class. I watched a lot of television, did a lot of reading. I love to read. I met friends for coffee, got groceries, ate out. It was a normal life for the most part. That’s what people who read the tabloids and gossip magazines don’t realize, that those pictures are just one night in the lives of those people.”
She frowned thoughtfully. “Sure, there are some Hollywood types who are more than a little crazy themselves, who definitely don’t live normal lives, but I wasn’t one of them.”
“I’ve noticed that you don’t get many calls on your cell phone.”
“I keep that particular number private. The only people who have it are a few friends and Dad and Heather.”
“So you haven’t heard from your friends back in Hollywood?”
“I didn’t expect to,” she admitted. “Most of the people I hung out with were more acquaintances than friends. It would definitely be a case of out of sight, out of mind with them.” As it would be with Troy, she thought. In all probability when he took her back to her house tomorrow, she wouldn’t cross his mind again. His job would be done and that was that.
And it was in those moments that she recognized how difficult it would be to tell him goodbye the next morning. By nine o’clock she got up from the sofa. “I’m exhausted,” she said. “It’s been a long day.”
He stood and stretched with his arms overhead. “Yeah, it has been a long day.” She waited as he turned out the lights and checked the doors to make sure they were locked, then together they walked down the hallway.
“Good night, Brianna,” he said as they reached the doorway to the room where she’d been sleeping.
Knowing that the next day she’d tell him goodbye, knowing that she was already walking away with more than a little bit of a bruised heart, what she wanted from him at that moment wasn’t a simple good-night, but rather a final memory to carry with her when she walked away from him the next day.
“Troy.” His name fell from her lips as a plea, and as she stepped closer to him he opened his arms as if he’d expected her, welcomed her.
His mouth claimed hers with a fervent appetite and she responded with a hunger of her own. She molded against him and felt his instant response, and she knew that even though she wasn’t the woman he wanted forever, she was the woman he wanted at this very moment.
It was enough for her, because it had to be enough. She wrapped her arms more tightly around his neck, wanting to lose herself in him.
When the kiss finally ended, she took his hand and pulled him into the bedroom. “Troy, make love to me,” she whispered. “This night is all we have left and I want you. I need you.”
The wanting was naked on his handsome features. His eyes burned with it, his body tensed with it, and yet she felt his hesitation. “You’re going to take me home in the morning. Tomorrow you get your life back but tonight you’re mine.”
She wouldn’t have thought it possible for his eyes to flame hotter, but they did and without saying a word he began to unbutton his shirt.
As he undressed, she did the same and together they slid beneath the sheets and reached for one another again.
He knew where to kiss her, how to touch her to evoke the most pleasure, and she wanted to weep as her love for him buoyed up inside her, filling her to such a degree that there was no room for anything else.
It was as if they had been lovers for years and yet had maintained the excitement, the adventure of new lovers. She kissed him with desperation, with a shivering need to indelibly burn this not only into her own mind but also into his.
She wrapped her legs around his, loving the feel of his warm nakedness against her. She memorized his scent, knowing that if she ever smelled his particular brand of cologne again she would immediately be assailed by thoughts of this night in his arms.
As his mouth took hers again, she ran her fingers over his silklike short hair and down the broad width of his back. She felt so safe in his arms, as if it were where she belonged forever. But forever ended when the sun rose again and she intended to savor each and every moment of this final time with him.
His hands moved to her breasts, where he used his thumbs to caress her nipples until she thought she’d scream. Each and every touch evoked sweet sensations that kept her breathless and achingly needy.
As his hand left her breast and traveled the length of her abdomen, a new, more urgent tension filled her. She arched up to meet his touch and whispered his name in the darkness of the room.
He was a thoughtful lover, both passionate and gentle, demanding and giving. She knew instinctively that there would never come a time that his touch didn’t excite her, warm her to the core of her being.
“You need to answer. It might be something important.” His voice was low, thick with lingering desire.
He rolled away from her and she wanted to scream in frustration. He grabbed her cell from the nightstand and handed it to her.
As she flipped it open she was aware of Troy getting out of bed and reaching for his clothing. Whatever had been about to happen between them was over.
The caller ID read anonymous but she flipped it open and answered. “Hello?”
“Brianna, this is Mike.” There was an urgency in his voice that shot her to an upright position. “I’m sorry to bother you but in the craziness of the afternoon apparently I forgot to get Big Sam into his kennel. I just stopped by Precious Pets to check things out before calling it a night and he’s here, but it looks like he’s been hit by a car. It’s bad, Brianna. I think you should get right over here.”
“We’ll be right there,” she exclaimed and quickly hung up.
“What happened?” Troy asked, already dressed in his slacks and reaching for his shirt.
She flew out of bed, her heart hammering with anxiety. “It’s Big Sam. Mike thinks he’s been hit by a car.” She grabbed a pair of jogging pants from the drawer and yanked them on, then pulled on a T-shirt.
She made it to the door before the tears welled up and exploded out of her. Not Big Sam. Please, don’t take him away from her.
Suddenly she was sobbing, not just out of fear for Big Sam, but for her missing father, for the loss of the family she thought she’d known and finally because she loved a man who she knew wouldn’t, couldn’t love her back.
Chapter Twelve
Troy pulled her against his chest and held her. She leaned into him with a trust and a vulnerability that humbled him.
He should have seen this coming, her tears, her utter defeat. Up until now she’d shown amazing strength and control. She’d met each and every dead end, each and every threat with a stiff upper lip and a sense of humor, but now both seemed to have abandoned her.
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