by Janie Crouch
“Looks like it’s going to take twenty-four to thirty-six hours for anyone to be able to get out here to us. The storm moved in so fast there’s a lot of people trapped. Emergency vehicles are trying to work the most critical cases first.”
“I have some food and water,” Keira said. “Although I hate not to be at Fresh Starts with the girls.”
“I got the generator to them, so they should be fine even if they lose power. And Heather has her formula.”
“And I guess between the fire, junk food and water I have, we should be okay here.” She snuggled in a little closer.
“I have some protein bars, too.”
Once Keira knew the necessities of their own survival and those of the women back at the shelter were taken care of, she promptly fell asleep. Roman felt it as her entire weight slumped against him.
Honestly, he was amazed she’d stayed awake this long. Her body had burned more calories in the last hour trying to keep her alive than most people did in a full day.
He kept her pressed fully against him the entire time she slept. His arms wouldn’t seem to let her go even if he’d wanted to.
And he didn’t want to.
Maybe he dozed, maybe he didn’t, but she was still in his arms when he realized she was waking up.
“Did I fall asleep in the middle of a sentence?” she asked.
Roman chuckled. “Almost, but it’s understandable, given what you’ve been through.” They both lay there in silence for a few minutes.
“Maybe that pregnancy test was wrong.”
Roman froze, surprised at how disappointed he would be if that was true.
“Is that what you hope? That the pregnancy test is wrong?”
Roman realized that form of questioning was straight out of the Grace Parker playbook. Sadness hit him once again at her death.
Keira shrugged. “Honestly, I haven’t even allowed myself to think about it. I mean, I love kids. I’ve always wanted kids, but I just didn’t think it was in the cards for me.”
Relief hit Roman again. He hadn’t even considered that she might not want to keep a baby. Andrea and Brandon had alluded to some trauma in Keira’s past, but Roman didn’t know what that was.
“Why wouldn’t it be in the cards for you? You’re certainly still young enough to have kids.”
“I guess I just always equated kids with being married, and that’s not for me. Not ever again.”
“You were married before?”
He felt her nod against his chest. “Yes. A long time ago. Not something I care to repeat.”
“It ended badly?”
“If by ended badly you mean I had to leave the hospital with a dislocated shoulder, a broken wrist and two cracked ribs and just the money I had in my pocket, drive to another state, not use my identification in case my husband or his family came searching for me, and start my entire life over with nothing to my name?” She pulled slightly away from him. “Then, yeah. It ended badly.”
Chapter Thirteen
Roman fought to control the rage coursing through him. Keira was so tiny, probably only five foot three, and couldn’t weigh much more than a hundred and ten pounds. The thought of someone deliberately hurting her, breaking her bones, created a seething fury inside him.
And more so because he knew that the incident she mentioned probably hadn’t been the first time she’d been abused.
“You’re going to need to tell me this entire story,” he said slowly. “Hopefully, starting from the end, where you tell me this guy is rotting in prison right now.”
Keira gave a bitter laugh. “Unfortunately not. But he’s completely out of my life and that’s really all I care about.”
Roman cared for a hell of a lot more than that, but he wasn’t going to push it right now. “How long ago did this happen?”
“It actually started when I was seventeen. My parents died in a car accident. The only way I can live with myself, live with what I allowed to happen to me, is by accepting that I was reeling from their death.”
Roman wanted to argue that none of this could possibly be Keira’s fault. It didn’t matter what she had said or done. This husband of hers should never have laid his hands on her in anger. No man should ever lay his hands on a woman in anger.
But now wasn’t the time to get into that. And him simply saying the words were not going to change how she viewed the situation.
“You were a child,” he said. “Losing your parents had to completely shake your world. That’s understandable.”
“That’s what I tell myself. And I know it’s true.”
She paused for so long Roman wasn’t sure if she was going to continue, but she finally did.
“Jonathan was older than me by a couple years. He pursued me. That’s really the only word for it. I was so lost and so wanting to be loved that I totally bought into it.
“After I graduated high school, I was going to go off to college. I wasn’t going to stay in Colorado. I wanted to go to California or Florida or even Texas. Someplace where there was a beach.” Her laugh was derisive. “Jonathan told me that we would get married and go to different beaches together. All over the world.”
Roman struggled for an even tone. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”
“No, it sounded wonderful. I knew his family had money, and honestly, I didn’t think that they were going to let Jonathan get married, at least not at the ripe old age of twenty-one, when I was fresh out of high school. But he talked me into eloping.”
Keira sat up and moved away from Roman. He wanted to pull her back close to him but knew she needed space.
“I was stupid. Or Jonathan was very good at hiding what he was. Or maybe both.” She shook her head slowly. “My story isn’t much different than a lot of other women’s. I wanted the relationship to work. I didn’t have anywhere else to go.
“When he hit me the first time, we were at his parents’ house,” she continued, still staring at the fire. “It wasn’t right in front of them, but they had to have heard it. His mom pulled me aside a little later and encouraged me not to do anything that would make Jonathan angry.”
Roman sat up also, but was careful not to touch Keira. He wasn’t sure if she would want to be touched now at all.
“I was mad when she said that. Shocked, because my husband of six months had just backhanded me across the face, and mad that she didn’t start yelling at him.”
Roman nodded. “She absolutely should’ve started yelling at him. More than that.”
“What I didn’t understand was that I was the outsider. That their family name was to be protected and sheltered no matter what.” Her voice grew very soft. “What I didn’t know was that they already knew their son was a sociopath with violent tendencies. What his mother said to me that night wasn’t marital advice, it was her trying to help me. In some really sick way.”
“What?” Roman asked.
“I don’t know if her husband beat her also. Or if Jonathan had hit his mother at times. But she knew. She knew what he would do to me. And knew the family would protect him no matter what.
“When he beat me badly enough to put me in the hospital the first time, I thought that would be it.”
Roman couldn’t help it; his breath sucked in at her words. First time. Hospital. His rage grew.
“Jonathan’s father came to see me and seemed very concerned. I was nineteen years old and didn’t have any family. Over the year and a half that we’d been married, Jonathan had slowly cut me off from every friend I had.” She shook her head. “So very similar to so many other women’s stories.
“I left the hospital with no intention of going home. But they had a driver pick me up and take me there, anyway. His parents were at our house and listened while Jonathan begged me for another chance.”
Keira glanced over at Roman and shrugged. “Who know
s, I was so stupid I might’ve given him another chance, anyway. But when Jonathan and his mom left the room, his dad came to me and made sure I understood that if I left Jonathan and tried to tell anybody about what had really happened, all the doctors and other medical records would show no sign of Jonathan’s abuse. All they would point to were my alcoholic tendencies.” She shook her head. “Never mind that I wasn’t old enough to buy alcohol and had never had a drink in my life.”
Roman closed his eyes. Took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“Keira...” He wanted to say something, anything, to make this better. But he knew there was nothing that could be said. He got up and added more wood to the fire, needing to do something with his hands.
Besides find this Jonathan guy and give him a taste of what broken bones felt like.
“Things were better for a while after that. As always.” Keira’s voice became much more matter-of-fact. “Abuse tends to run in cycles. Honeymoon period. Escalation period. Violence.
“Finally, the last time Jonathan put me in the hospital, I was more prepared. I had purchased a car, a junker I bought for five hundred bucks by selling some earrings he’d given me—ironically, after another time he’d put me in the hospital. I kept it parked at a grocery store lot near our house.”
Roman lay back down where he’d been before, trying to give her space. She brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. She stared out at the fire in the stove.
“When I got to the hospital, the same doctors saw me. The ones I knew Jonathan’s family had paid off. But this time as soon as the doctors left, and before Jonathan’s family could arrive, I walked—staggered is really more the word—out to the nurses’ station.
“Stephanie Scott.” Keira whispered the name with reverence. “That was the nurse I found. One I’d never seen before. She helped me, believed me, when I told her what had been happening.”
Keira’s voice grew stronger. “She helped me get documentation. Pictures of what Jonathan had done to me. Statements from several other doctors—not the ones on Jonathan’s family’s payroll—and everything I would need to file a police report if I wanted to.
“I don’t know what would’ve happened if it hadn’t been for Stephanie. She saved my life.”
Keira straightened slightly and continued. “When Jonathan’s father came to see me a couple days later to give me the normal ‘we’ll keep this between us’ talk, I just nodded. Because I knew I had just mailed them the copies of the documents I now had, to buy my freedom.
“As soon as Jonathan’s dad left, I checked myself out of the hospital and got into my little car and drove. I drove until I ran out of money and couldn’t get any farther. That ended up being Buckeye, Arizona. Somebody gave me a job and paid me under the table, since I didn’t want to use my regular ID.”
Because her husband would’ve used his family’s money to track her down and drag her back. She didn’t say it, but Roman knew it was true.
“It bought me the time I needed to get a lawyer. Lo and behold, nobody fought me when I got my divorce from Jonathan.”
Roman could only imagine how damning the evidence had to have been for her to get the divorce without a fight.
“Have you had any problems with him since?”
She finally looked over at Roman. “No. Nothing. My lawyer made sure his family understood that I would press charges if he came anywhere near me or tried to talk to me at all. I was twenty years old when all that happened. And thankfully, haven’t had to deal with Jonathan or his family for six years.”
“And that’s why you opened Fresh Starts.” It wasn’t a question, after what he had just heard. “To help women who are in a similar situation as you were.”
Keira shrugged. “My parents, rest their souls, left me some money when they died. But trying to be wise, they left it in a trust fund that I couldn’t access until I was twenty-five.”
Roman shook his head. “That money would’ve made a huge difference to you when all the stuff was going down with your ex-husband.”
“I know.” She nodded. “But in a lot of ways I’m thankful that I couldn’t touch it until last year. That money allowed me to buy the salon and the building free and clear. So now all the money the salon makes can just be used to help in whatever way is needed most. No red tape. No applying for grants or stuff.”
And no one could ever take it away from her. Keira had had so much taken away from her, and she had ensured that would not happen again.
And damn if that wasn’t the gutsiest thing he’d ever heard in his entire life.
“I definitely could’ve used someplace like Fresh Starts when I first left Jonathan. Someplace where I could just get back on my feet and also learn a trade.” She looked over at him and wagged her eyebrows. “Not that stripping wasn’t a trade, also.”
“Keira, when I let my mom throw me for a loop a couple of months ago... I’m sorry. I really don’t have any problem with your former line of work. If you liked to do it, and it worked for you, then who am I to judge?”
“It did work for me. But there were some women there, Andrea included, who it didn’t work for. But they didn’t have any other choice. They didn’t have any other options. That’s what I want to do with Fresh Starts. Just give women options.”
“I was coming back for you, you know,” he said, his voice getting huskier.
She spun around toward him. “What?”
“This thing with Damien Freihof gave me the excuse to come talk to you. But I would’ve been coming, anyway. I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind for the last two months.”
She stared at him for a long moment before turning away. “Me, either.”
“I handled it badly.”
She shrugged. “We both did. Both got a little scared at how intense things became.”
Roman was suddenly very aware that they were both still nearly naked in this small room.
It didn’t help when Keira scooted back and lay down next to him again.
“And it was definitely intense,” she whispered, her palm finding his chest and her thigh draping over his legs.
His hand fell to her hip, his fingers clutching at the skin there, almost of their own volition.
This. This was what he hadn’t been able to get out of his mind for the last two months. The feel of her skin, the curve of her waist, the brown of her eyes.
Right now, those eyes burned with the same passion he felt. Neither of them cared that there was a storm raging outside. Especially when Keira used her weight to push him onto his back and rolled on top of him, straddling his hips.
“I’m not cold anymore,” she said, her voice husky. “The opposite, in fact.”
“Let me help you with that then.” He reached up and slid her shirt, which he’d unbuttoned earlier, completely off her shoulders and dropped it to the side.
“Twenty-four to thirty-six hours, huh?” she asked, as she trailed her fingers up his arms, over his shoulders and down his chest. “It seems to me the last time we had that much time together, we found some pretty interesting ways to keep ourselves occupied.”
For the rest of his natural born life, Roman would never forget the ways they’d kept themselves occupied at the hotel after the wedding.
Hell, they’d made a baby during it. Neither of them were ever going to be able to forget it.
He reached up and gently grabbed a fistful of her gorgeous black hair, gently pulling her down to his lips.
“We’ve still got more to talk about. The baby. What we’re going to do,” he said against her mouth.
“Later,” she replied. “Right now, we’ve got much more important things to do. Like celebrate that we’re both alive.”
Roman couldn’t argue with that logic, so he pulled her closer for another kiss. Shifting so their hips fell together, they both gasped.
She was right. Words could wait. Their bodies definitely couldn’t.
Chapter Fourteen
The floor was definitely not as comfortable as the hotel bed had been two months ago, and the food and amenities were decidedly more lacking.
But the lovemaking was equally as mind-blowing. Keira sort of wished it hadn’t been. Had convinced herself that their time together had just been a fluke. That she’d imagined they’d fitted together so perfectly.
She’d been wrong. They were still perfect.
And now Keira was about to have a full-on panic attack. Maybe it was dragging up the old Jonathan mud, or maybe it was just her coming to grips with the reality that she was going to have a baby.
Not just have a baby, but have one with a man who was from a wealthy and well-connected family like Jonathan’s.
Logically, she knew there were vast differences between Roman and Jonathan. The things Jonathan had done to her Roman had dedicated his life to preventing.
But that young woman deep inside Keira, the one who had lost so much at the hands of a sociopath who was called her husband, was much harder to convince.
So by the time they got the texts the next day that emergency services were on their way to the church, Keira had completely withdrawn from Roman.
She could tell he knew. Could tell he was frustrated. But she didn’t know what to do to make him feel any better and still keep herself from falling apart.
He reached out to rub her arm, and before she could stop herself, she flinched. His hand fell back to his side.
“You have to know I would never hurt you,” he murmured, so softly she almost couldn’t hear him.
She sighed. “Of course I do. Especially after last night. But it’s not always that easy. And...”
“And what?”
She could tell he was trying very hard not to let any frustration leak into his tone.
“I just don’t know what we’re going to do. Your family, Roman. I know you love them, but I’m not sure I can ever trust them.”