“Lie!” said the doll. A peal of shrieking, mechanical laughter.
I hated this little wooden bastard. “It’s what he said. You asked what he said, and I told you.”
“But you know Nyxobas doesn’t lie,” said the doll. More earsplitting laughter.
Dread fluttered in my skull. Whatever else happened, I didn’t want to live in a world that Ruadan wasn’t in.
I smacked the glass. “I answered your question. Let us through.”
The doll went still, jerking to a halt.
I glanced at the door, and the lock slid open. The little man shifted out of the way.
Ruadan’s eyes had darkened, like they did whenever he sensed a threat, whenever his life was at risk. Despite my assurances about Nyxobas’s prophecy being bollocks, Ruadan believed it. “Why did you lie to me again?”
“Because I don’t want it to be true!” I hissed. “I don’t want to live in a world that you’re not in. You and I belong together. I am Death, but you give me life. Your loss would stop time and blacken the skies. Your death would be my apocalypse.”
The mechanical doll groaned, emitting another cackle.
I pointed at it. “If you died, my soul would die, too, and I’d turn into that fucking thing. A creaking, empty, dead-eyed husk devoid of real life. Do you understand? So it won’t happen, because it can’t. I’m Death, and I say when the apocalypse happens. Fuck your grandpa. That’s it. End of story. Now let’s move on from that wooden weirdo, and have a normal, focused mission procuring a satyr cock, shall we?”
Ruadan was staring at me, so intently and deeply that I felt as if he were seeing into my very soul. His magic skimmed and snaked over my skin like a caress, and he reached up to cup my cheek.
His touch was painfully light. The gentleness of it was like a knife to my heart, because it felt like a goodbye. I didn’t want this now. This felt like the end. This was why I hadn’t told him.
Before I could say another word, the door groaned open. I pulled away from Ruadan, not accepting his goodbye, and I took a step into the doorway. Flashing, colored lights pulsed over a tent crowded with people and swaths of bright silks in scarlet and cobalt.
Truthfully, the biggest draw to my eye were all the breasts. In the crowded tent, the women were hardly dressed. Many of them were in sequined corsets that exposed them from the nipples up. Others wore thigh-high stockings and the tiniest of knickers. Many of the men were shirtless, their muscled bodies oiled, mustaches waxed into curls.
Brightly colored lanterns hung from the top of a peaked circus tent, casting lurid lights over half-naked acrobats above us, and a tightrope walker who wore only a bowtie, high heels, and a feathered bustier. A luxurious white lion prowled around the edge of the circus, and a naked woman with long blond hair rode a horse like Lady Godiva.
I tried to keep my eyes off all the writhing bodies around us—the thrusting and groping and gyrating hips. It was less of a circus and more of an orgy designed by a Victorian pervert.
I narrowed my eyes. “What did you say you used to come here for?”
I already knew how he was going to respond—with something vague and evasive like. “I didn’t say, actually.” To my surprise, he met my gaze evenly and said, “I’m an incubus. I came here to feed off lust, so I could gain strength.”
“Oh. Right.” He made it all sound so reasonable when he put it that way.
His gaze slowly made its way down my body. As it did, I looked down at myself, shocked to see that my own clothing had transformed. My leather trousers had changed into a tiny skirt, short enough that I was pretty sure my bum was peeking out the back. Thigh-high fishnet stockings covered my legs, and a tiny striped top stretched over my breasts—enough, at least, to cover the nipples. My bra had disappeared entirely. I yanked the tube top up higher, readjusting it.
Most annoyingly, my sword had vanished. “What the hells?”
“The circus master is the satyr. This is his magic.”
I looked up at Ruadan, whose clothing had changed into a cloak that covered his entire body. Only his pale violet eyes shone out from beneath his cowl. That gaze now swept over my body, lingering over my curves, my breasts, my hips, and I could feel his magic licking at my body.
He gripped me by the waist, his touch again agonizingly light.
“Not now,” I whispered into his neck. “Save that for later. After we save the world.”
After we save the world—and you are still alive because I won’t let you die.
His quiet growl trembled over my exposed skin.
“Now, where do we find this satyr?” I asked.
Ruadan tore his eyes away from me and looked around the circus tent.
A woman in a sheer bra and knickers walked up behind him and stroked his back, brushing a kiss over his neck. She was gripping a bottle of whiskey. “Been a long time since I’ve seen you, fae prince,” she giggled.
I arched an eyebrow at her. With her attention focused on Ruadan, I reached for the whiskey bottle in her hand. I might be needing this at some point. “Do you mind if I just…?”
She didn’t notice as I pulled it from her grip.
Ruadan quirked a smile. “Celeste. Do you know where I can find Andre?”
“No time for me tonight?” She pouted.
“Not tonight, love,” I said. “We need Andre. We need his penis, more precisely.”
She let out a long sigh. “Don’t we all?”
“Not like that— Never mind. Where is he?”
She pointed across the tent. “You’ll find him there, watching the glitter wrestling.”
We started weaving through all the lovers, the contortionists, and the wandering bears who were wearing more clothing than most of the women.
At last, we reached a particular ring. There, we found a golden satyr, standing proud. For a man with goat legs, he really wasn’t bad-looking, his face model-perfect, hair golden and wavy. Curled horns swooped back from his head, and the fur on his legs was the same beautiful amber as his hair. I tried not to look at his enormous erection, though I was fully aware it would be coming into play later this evening.
Ruadan sped up his gait, and I tried to keep up with him.
As we approached, the satyr turned to us, arching his eyebrows in surprise. “Ruadan! It’s been yonks!” Then, his expression darkened. “Wait a moment. I forgot you were with the Institute. You are, aren’t you? Bloody fascists. Assassinating everyone. I was doing wonderful business in London before you forced us all into this closed world. I need fresh blood in here, you know?” He licked his lips, and he swept his gaze down my body. “Like this pretty little thing. Saucy minx you got here. Can I have her?”
I resisted the urge to tell him this saucy minx was death personified, though the idea of wilting his raging boner was appealing. Instead, I smiled, playing nice. We needed his help.
“I’m taking you back to London, Andre,” said Ruadan. “You can recruit for fresh blood there until it’s time to return to your world.”
His eyes widened. “Why would you do me this favor?”
“We’re going to need your penis,” I said.
He smirked, purring, “Don’t they all?”
“No, I mean we need it to save the world,” I added.
“Of course you do.” He put his hands on his hips, beaming. “I’ve been waiting for this moment all my life.”
Chapter 25
The grim look on Aenor’s face when we returned to her shop immediately told me something was wrong. As Ruadan helped Andre out of the portal, Aenor pulled me behind the counter, her nails digging into my skin.
“What’s happening?” I hissed.
“I am here to save the world!” Andre proclaimed.
Aenor’s dark eyes were on me alone. “Okay, good job on … that, but I have bad news.”
“What?”
“One of my little sparrow spies was watching the Institute. And it seems that while you were fetching the satyr, Baleros came for your mist army
. He destroyed them.”
My stomach fell. “How is that possible?”
Ruadan cursed in Fae. “They’re unprotected now.”
Aenor shook her head, frowning. “He used powerful fire magic. He dissolved the mist army with flames. They’re gone. Evaporated.”
“This fucker has two gods working for him!” I shouted.
“This won’t end well for him,” Ruadan said again. But since I had no idea of the specifics on how that would backfire, it wasn’t terribly comforting. “And we can get the mist army back, I think. Just not right now.”
Cora stepped forward and tugged on my arm. “Let’s get the spell done, at least. Once your father cures the knights, the Institute won’t be quite as vulnerable.”
I followed Cora, and we all crammed into Aenor’s tiny, bone-decorated bedroom. Aenor stood against the wall, shielding her eyes as Ruadan directed Andre to the sea-green potion on the ground.
I did my best to not to watch Andre thrusting himself into the bubbling potion, and I was definitely pretending not to hear the unsettling sighing noises he was making. The news about the mist army had already nauseated me enough.
“Okay!” I shouted. “I think that’s quite enough stirring, Andre. Am I right, Aenor?”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” she called out from under her hands.
“All right, Andre,” said Ruadan in a weary tone that suggested he’d had to stage this kind of intervention before. “You have done the world an immeasurable service.”
Andre rose, grinning from ear to ear. “My glorious priapism will be praised in hymns and ballads from now until the end of time.”
I nodded. “That’s right. Lots of ballads. Now move along. Go around the portal to get to the door, and say hi to Karen on your way out.”
The floor creaked as he crossed out of the room.
Aenor’s features brightened as soon as he was gone. “Okay. Good. Let’s find your dad, shall we?” She crossed to the bubbling potion on the ground. “Cora, I’ll need your help.” Green magic sparked along her arm and charged down the end of her fingertips.
Cora stepped out of the corner of the room and summoned her own magic—a beautiful gray-blue that flickered around her hand. A phantom wind billowed through the room, lifting our hair, whipping at our skin. I had the strangest sensation of flying, that a salty tempest was buffeting us in this cramped room.
Their colored magic mingled above the potion, a stunning turquoise. My heart slammed hard against my ribs like a battle drum. At last, I’d find out where my parents were. I’d wrap my arms around my mum for the first time since I was a little girl.
The cloud of shimmering blue-green magic bloomed and pulsed above us. Then, an image began to take shape within the swirls of magic—stone arches, wood pews, stained glass windows—an ancient-looking church with a vaulted ceiling.
The vampire had said something about an old church. Baleros was in one, wasn’t he?
“St. Bartholomew’s,” said Ruadan. “It’s not far from here.”
I stared at it, starting to believe it at last. I was about to find my parents.
Aenor dropped my mother’s cherry-red hair into the cauldron next. The cloud of magic swirled a bit, then reformed to look like the same church. They were both there.
“They’re together,” I breathed.
But what the hells were they doing in that church?
They were in trouble, somehow. Baleros had trapped them. There was simply no other explanation.
I snatched my bag off the floor, now with a fresh stock of whiskey. “Let’s go get my parents.”
The sun was starting to rise by the time we neared Smithfield, tingeing the city with coral. Even after I’d left the circus world, I’d remained in this stupid tiny outfit, and I tugged up my little striped tube top to cover my nipples. We’d borrowed swords from Aenor, but her clothes were too small for me.
Ruadan’s gaze slid to me. “What do you expect to see when we find your father?”
“I have no idea. But I imagine we’re….” I was about to say rescuing him, but then I felt stupid. He was the bloody Horseman of Death. He didn’t need saving. “I don’t know.”
If he was okay, why hadn’t he come to find me once Nyxobas had let him out Eden? Finding his daughter should have been the first thing on his agenda. Adonis. Thanatos. Death himself. What in the heavens and hells would stop him from hunting his only child down at his first chance?
“Aenor said his curse had never taken hold,” Ruadan added. “What if Baleros figured out how to reverse that?”
“You’re being kind of a downer right now, Ruadan.” I refused to give credence to this theory. “Let’s cross that bridge when we come to it.”
We moved swiftly along the narrow alleyways. No portals for us this time, since ripping a watery hole in the earth tended to attract a fair bit of attention.
Despite what Ruadan had said, I couldn’t entertain the idea that my father’s seal had been opened, unleashing his curse.
I breathed in Ruadan’s smell: the apple and pine scent that had started to seem like home to me. As I did, I felt a fierce desire to protect him. And that meant acknowledging when threats might be real. My soul felt like it was ripped open as I imagined a deadly showdown between my father and my favorite demigod.
“I can’t die from his death powers,” I said quietly. “You can, if they’re powerful enough.”
My throat went dry at the thought of Ruadan growing sick with the Plague. Somewhere inside me, I had the power to stop this death magic, except that I had no idea how to control it.
I touched his arm. “Look, I have no idea what will happen. But you have your own way of gaining strength if you need it.” I flashed him a sad smile. “All you have to do is tell me you don’t ever want to see me again.” All he had to do was break my heart.
The look he gave me pierced me to the core. He opened his mouth to reply, but before he could get a word out, a shadow crossed over us. Something above had blotted out the sun for just a moment.
My blood roared as I glanced up at the heavens.
My stomach clenched at the sight of two winged creatures swooping above us—dark angels, wings outstretched, one much larger than the other. No—demons, probably. Silhouetted against the rising sun, their features were obscure. My heart slammed like a war drum. They both had bows and quivers slung over their backs, and their aerial position was a huge advantage.
Here, in the sunlight, Ruadan and I wouldn’t be able to move through the shadows the way we could at night.
I sucked in a sharp breath. “Can you see who that is?”
“Maddan.” Ruadan squinted into the sunlight as they swooped overhead. “The smaller one is Maddan. The other … I don’t know yet.”
I didn’t like the way they were swooping above the alley, like vultures eying up their prey.
Then, Maddan nocked an arrow, aiming it directly at us.
Bollocks.
I readied my sword, but when Maddan unleashed his arrow, Ruadan reached up, deflecting it with his sword.
“We’re going to need to run, but they can hit us easily from their vantage point. We’ll just have to go fast.” The air frosted as Ruadan summoned a blast of shadow magic to hurl at our celestial attackers. Then he shouted something in Ancient Fae that I was pretty sure was a vile swear. “They’re absorbing the shadow magic. Are you ready?”
“Wait.” Running through an alley left us vulnerable, and we’d just get hammered from above. Tingles raced down my spine, and I could feel the death angel ready to erupt out of my body. Good. We actually needed her, now, to slaughter the demons above us. “Not yet, Ruadan,” I said. “Cover me for a second. I have another idea.”
Just had to make sure I didn’t lose control completely.
Ruadan yanked me by the waist, pushing me against the wall just under a gutter overhang in the alley that shielded us a bit. I reached into my bug-out bag and yanked out the whiskey I’d taken from Celeste. I took a lon
g, glorious sip. Then another.
Above, the larger demon started screeching in a high-pitched voice. I couldn’t quite hear what he was saying, but there was something oddly familiar about it. How did I know that voice?
Ruadan pulled me tight against him, the arrows coming faster now. I could feel the air start to cool with his dark magic.
As I drank deeply from my bottle, Ruadan gaped at me. “We’re waiting here just so you can drink whiskey?” he asked incredulously.
I drained the last drop. At last, I felt the comfortable buzz that I needed not to slaughter the whole world. “I need to drink whiskey so I can fly.”
“What?” he barked. “You have to drink whiskey to fly? That’s a shit superpower.”
I’d had no idea that Ruadan used words like superpower. There were a lot of things I still had to learn about him, which meant we had to get out of here alive.
“I’ll distract them from above, and you run away.”
“I’m not taking part in a plan that involves the phrase ‘you run away.’”
“Look, there are literally no good options here, so don’t act like there’s a better plan.” I glanced at the mouth of the alley, and my pulse raced as I saw a flicker of movement. Demons were waiting for us to come out. When Ruadan got to the end, they’d trap him and cut the World Key right off his chest.
“Let’s go,” said Ruadan.
“Wait!” I grabbed his arm. “They’re waiting for us at the other end. It’s an ambush.”
Chapter 26
The thought that there was still so much I didn’t know about Ruadan occurred to me a second time. We had to get out of here so I could learn every single thing about him, about every moment of his long life.
Arrows were slamming into the wall next to us.
But right now, I had one crucial question. “Ruadan, can you fly?” I shouted. “Winged creatures can fly.” Thunk. “Except chickens, penguins. Ostrich.” Shit, shit. Focus, Liora. “My point is, now would be a good time to fly.”
Court of Dreams (Institute of the Shadow Fae Book 4) Page 14