A furious roar from Ruadan shook the stones beneath my feet. My spirit leapt as Ruadan ripped himself free from his iron pinions, tearing at his wings. The pain must have been unbearable, shredding his leathery wings. Ruadan caught Baleros’s hand before the knife could plunge into his chest. Then, Ruadan twisted his arm, breaking it.
I was almost at him now, my sword ready. Baleros’s dark eyes shifted to me. For the first time, I knew he was afraid of me.
I drove the blade into his neck, severing his spine and throat in an instant. His body burst into flames, knocking me back with the heat. I coughed as the scent of charred flesh filled the air.
A temporary victory—nothing more. The fire goddess had claimed his body. Ash wafted into the air around us. He could come back at any moment, revived by the goddess he served. And worse, the demons were still surrounding us, intent on our deaths.
Ruadan wrapped his arms around my waist. His leather wings were forming a barrier once more, but they wouldn’t last forever. The rips in his wings made my chest tight.
“They’re after me,” he whispered into my ear. He lifted one of his arms over my shoulders and carefully cupped my head in the cocoon of his wings. “They’re after the World Key, not you. I can cover you while you get out of here.”
“I’m not leaving you here, you moron,” I whispered back. “Make a portal.”
“I can’t. There’s too much iron in my blood.” He loosened his hold on me. “When I open my wings—”
I locked my arms tightly around him. I wasn’t letting him go. I wasn’t letting Baleros get his hands on the Prince of Emain again.
“Fine,” I said. “Open your wings.”
Light poured in as Ruadan’s wings parted, but I kept my grip tight on his waist, squeezing him to my body.
I am the alpha and the omega.
With an iron will, my broken wings lifted us into the air with all the strength I had left. “Hold on to me,” I said as we rose above Smithfield.
He weighed roughly as much as a truck, and pain screamed through my shoulder blades. He gripped onto me, too, holding me tightly around the waist with his powerful arms. His wings were beating the air slowly, but they’d been damaged more than mine. I didn’t think he could fly on his own.
“What the hells are you doing?” he said. “I told you to run.”
“Was that an order?”
“Yes. I’m the Grand Master. Have you forgotten?”
“Almost there.” I grunted with the effort. My grip on him was ferocious. Only a few feet to the churchyard.
My father was supposed to be in that church. Would we find him there?
I was barely holding on, unable to think clearly.
Two arrows thunked off Ruadan’s wings. He snarled, tightening his grip on me.
We finally reached the gated churchyard, and I tried to move slower for a gentle landing, but my strength was giving out.
Good enough.
I let go of Ruadan, and he jumped to the ground, landing hard on a raised patch of grass between tombstones. I landed just after him, the impact shooting up my calves and thighs.
I searched the church for signs of my dad, but I didn’t see him. I could smell him, the dark scent of myrrh. A sheen of shadow magic glimmered over the church, protecting it like a shield.
A loud thud from behind me turned my head. Already, a demon with an axe was trying to hack through the wooden door at the gate.
I ran for the ancient church doors, but as I touched the metal doorknob, a blast of electric shadow magic knocked me back. I just barely managed to stop myself from falling back flat onto my broken wings.
“Dad?” I shouted at the church, like an idiot.
The church did not respond.
To our left, a demon with an arrow was aiming it over the iron gate. There really wasn’t much cover here, and we needed a portal immediately. In the church’s ancient, arched doorway, Ruadan began shielding me again with his wings. His powerful body pressed against mine, wings splayed open to keep me safe.
I turned to him. “You need to heal,” I said, hoping the ferocity in my voice would convey my meaning.
If he wanted to gain strength, all he needed to do was tell me he didn’t love me. He just had to say he never wanted to see me again. The power of that heartbreak would feed him with the strength of a thousand armies.
You’re a monster, Liora, and you never should have been let out of your cage. That’s what he needed to say to me—the truth that I carried with me at all times. That was all. The pain of a perfect betrayal would feed his broken body, and he could open a portal.
Instead, he was cupping my face.
“Do it,” I whispered.
I couldn’t entirely spell it out. If I said, “Tell me you don’t love me,” and he repeated it like a puppet, I wouldn’t believe his words. My heart wouldn’t break enough. He had to crush my spirit in his own words. Why did he not get this?
“I love you,” I prompted him. Don’t you get it? Feed, fomoire.
He pulled me against his powerful chest, kissing my neck. “I love you, too,” he murmured. “That’s why we will keep each other safe.”
Warmth spread through my belly. “You idiot. If you broke my heart, we could be getting out of here right now.”
His dark, fierce gaze bored into me, then stroked down my body. He slid his hands down to my waist, gripping me possessively. “That’s not the only way I grow strong.” Dark seduction laced his voice.
Could I really give him the strength he needed right here, with the demons closing in on us?
I supposed lust wasn’t the worst idea.
I pressed myself against him, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him. From my waist, his hands slid lower, cupping my bum under my barely existent skirt. He was teasing me just enough to make my blood roar.
For a fraction of a moment, I prayed to the gods that my dad wasn’t in the church right now. Then, I forgot about him entirely, my attention completely focused on Ruadan’s hands on my body and the silky feel of his tongue against mine. I hoisted myself up, wrapping my legs around his waist.
Ruadan pulled away from the kiss, then whispered in my ear, “Get ready for this.”
That was all the warning I had before the ground opened up in the stone beneath us and I plunged into the cold waters. As the portal churned around me, I thought my wings would rip right off my back.
Chapter 29
Gasping for breath, I lay flat on my stomach on a bed of the softest moss I’d ever felt. The air smelled heavy and damp with honeysuckle and ferns. A river burbled nearby. Morning sunlight streamed through towering oaks, flecking the emerald earth with chinks of amber.
I inhaled again, catching the faint scent of apples on the breeze. So Ruadan had taken me back to his childhood home once more—back to Emain. This was home to him, the first place in his mind he’d imagine when he thought of safety.
Gods, I wanted to stay here with him forever, just living in the forest. Clean water, meals of mushrooms and honey, fish from the river. Just basically eating and sleeping and kissing Ruadan whenever I wanted.
Except that would mean leaving the Institute and possibly most of London to die a horrible death.
I felt as if every bone in my wings had been broken and poorly sealed back together again with duct tape. Turned out that wings were fabulous, and they could make you feel euphoric. They made you feel like a god. But the flip side was that they made you vulnerable and could leave you a crumpled and broken heap on a forest floor.
“Wings are like love,” I muttered into the moss.
“What?” Ruadan asked.
“Nothing.”
I turned my head to look at him. Shirtless, he was crouching, pulling up clumps of moss from the earth. What was he doing? And more importantly, how was he moving? I supposed he’d probably been managing the pain of wing injuries for centuries, while this was a whole new world to me.
“What are you doing with the moss?” I asked.
“I need to fix your wings,” he said. “You won’t be able to transform to your normal form while they’re broken like that.”
“What about yours?” I asked.
“We’ll heal my wings after.”
My cheeks heated as I thought of what sort of healing that would entail.
He shifted closer to me. “This might hurt a bit at first,” he said.
I held my breath, and I winced at the feeling of pressure on my right wing, but the moss was cool against it.
“This isn’t ordinary moss,” Ruadan murmured. “It’s enchanted, from the Emain forest. With this and my magic, you’ll heal fast.”
Along with the moss, his magic slid over my wings, soothing all the pain. I breathed in and out deeply, taking in the rich forest air. Already, I could feel my wings growing stronger. Healing magic spiraled over my feathers, stroking each one, straightening their quills and down.
It occurred to me that Ruadan was perfectly savage and perfectly serene at the same time. He was a beast, comfortable with himself. And when I was with him, my mind felt tranquil. He excited my body with a wild intensity, and yet he was the only one who could calm the raging waters of my mind. He was the only one who could subdue Baleros’s voice. My old master lived in the darkest hollows of my skull, whispering monster, and Ruadan was there to silence him.
Ruadan—god of sleep—had the power to make me feel normal and whole. And that was amazing magic indeed.
His fingertips brushed down my wings, stroking my delicate feathers, and I shivered at his touch. The tips of my feathers were immensely sensitive, and at that moment, I knew I never wanted anyone but Ruadan to touch them. I trusted no one like I trusted him.
His magic whispered over them, a healing balm that felt like it was made for me. I breathed in the charged, enchanted air of the Emain forest.
At last, when my wings felt completely strong once more, they retracted into my shoulder blades. I sighed and rolled over onto my back.
My little top had slid down somewhat, and bits of moss and soil stuck to the top of my breasts. I brushed them off, wondering precisely how many demons I’d exposed myself to when I’d been fighting in the ridiculous satyr-inspired outfit. Then, I pushed myself up to my feet.
Despite the gentleness of Ruadan’s healing, I still had a monster before me. This was Ruadan the Incubus, not Ruadan the sophisticated Grand Master.
His dark gaze was as bestial and ferocious as ever. He looked hungry for me, his intensity charging the air around us. In the underground river, when I’d taken off my clothes in front of him, I’d been unable to meet his gaze—certain that if I had, the world would combust around us. Now, I could feel his eyes on me, and I wanted to burn in that inferno.
“Now you,” I said.
With a sly smile, I tugged down my tube top until my breasts popped out, and I slid the top all the way down over my belly and hips, the curve of my arse, until I stepped out of it completely.
When I stood up again, Ruadan stared as my nipples hardened in the forest air. Goosebumps rose on my skin with the anticipation of his touch, and a pale flush spread over my chest.
Arching an eyebrow, I backed up against the rough bark of an oak. The feel of his silky magic on me was a sexual promise that made my toes curl, and I tugged up the hem of my short skirt.
His body had gone completely rigid, and a feral growl rumbled out of his chest. His wild magic skittered along my breasts and belly, and it stroked my thighs. We hadn’t even touched yet, but he was looking at me like he wanted to devour me, and already, a molten hot ache was building between my legs. I wanted to feel his hands there, his tongue thrusting.
He made a low and bestial sound, and he started to move for me. I held up one finger, signaling for him to stop right where he was. Violet magic flared out from his body. He looked as if he were ready to rip this forest apart to get to me.
He’d get to me soon enough, but stoking desire was all about just the right amount of denial.
And right now, Ruadan’s body was already responding to my desire. His muscles beamed with violet light as he fed off my lust, and his body was taut with anticipation. By the tightly coiled look of his muscles, he was using every inch of his restraint not to attack me right now. He took a step closer even though I’d told him not to, eyes coal-black. A muscle twitched in his jaw.
With his gaze penetrating me, I reached under my skirt, hooking my thumbs into the hem of my tiny knickers, and I pulled those off, too, down to my ankles. The breeze—along with Ruadan’s magic—kissed my bare thighs. Despite its coolness, my skin was hot. A strand of my lavender hair stuck to my cheek.
I left the tiny skirt on, but nothing else. Already, I was so turned on I couldn’t think straight. I beckoned Ruadan closer, wildly aching for him. My thighs clenched as he took a step closer, and liquid heat arced through me.
Snarling, he moved for me like a beast let out of his cage. He gripped my wrists, pinning them over my head. My pulse pounded hard and fast, and my breathing sped up. My nipples brushed against his chest painfully lightly. His other hand was on my hip, his grip fierce.
I’d made him wait, and now he was in complete control. He kissed me slowly, savoring it.
I groaned, trying to move against him. Gods, I needed him now. I pulled away from the kiss for a moment, catching my breath, and I pulled my wrists from his grasp. I unbuttoned his trousers, staring into his dark eyes as I did. He gasped as my fingertips brushed against him.
“Tell me how you feel about me.” The ultimate aphrodisiac.
With his free hand, he caressed my face. “You’re perfect for me, as if the gods made us for each other. Even if you’re flawed, the whole of you is perfect. If I lost you, I’d never sleep again.” Now, his hand stroked down my body, palming one of my breasts. “Enough talking.”
His mouth was hot on my neck, tongue flicking over my skin. At the apex of my thighs, a fiery, slick ache built so intensely I wanted to groan. Lust pounded through my blood, pulsing hot. One of his fingers stroked me, and I almost lost my mind. I’d made him wait before, and now I was on the verge of begging him.
“Ruadan.” His name came out like a moan, pleading. I reached up for his wing, brushing my fingertip over the top. His body stiffened, fingers tightening on my arse.
I hooked my leg around one of his, and I ran my foot up the back of his leg, my little skirt riding up even higher. His gaze swept down between my thighs.
At that, he reached down and ripped the little skirt off me. My desire was almost unbearable as he lowered me to the ground, deftly managing to cup the back of my head. He was still being too gentle, too careful with me, the ache in my core demanding that he move faster.
I let my legs fall open, and he moved between them. I gripped him hard around his back, pulling him into me.
He slid into me, and I moaned his name. Our bodies merged as he filled me deeply. Everything left my mind except the feel of his slow, powerful stroke. He claimed my mouth with his, kissing me deeply as he thrust into me. My legs wrapped around him, and I thrust my fingers into his hair, trying to pull him closer as my hips moved against him.
It was like we’d been made for each other—my lover, perfect in his flaws, the one who made me feel safe and calmed the wild waters of my mind. We melded with each other, intertwined like flower stems in a wreath—no end and no beginning between us.
“I love you,” I breathed into his neck.
As he whispered it back, ecstatic release rippled through my body, and I shuddered around him.
Chapter 30
Still naked, I curled around Ruadan’s body on the soft, mossy earth. Completely satiated, he glowed with powerful shadow magic. He’d healed completely, and his wings, no longer broken, slid back into his body.
He stroked his hand down my back slowly. We couldn’t stay here much longer. The Shadow Fae needed Adonis’s power, and we had to return to London. But I needed just another moment here with him before we took on our enemies.
<
br /> “Why this particular part of the forest?” I asked into his chest. “You were in immense pain. You nearly died. And in your panic, you took us to this particular part of Emain. Why here?”
He stroked my hair. “This is where I used to play as a very young boy. Before I joined the Shadow Fae and before Baleros trained me. Before I laid eyes on the Caoranach. I used to play here with my half-brothers.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. His brothers had died when I’d unleashed my magic. “What were their names?”
“Mochan and Nuallan. Both were older than me. They hunted boar here. They were brilliant hunters. We’d roast the meat over a fire at the end of the hunt. They let me drink their beer sometimes.”
I smiled at his memories. Then, I lifted my head from his chest. “There are boar here?”
Ruadan kissed my neck. “They only come out at night. I carved my own spear from a branch. I didn’t kill a single boar. I just liked being with Mochan and Nuallan. Before Baleros trained me, I wasn’t suited to killing. I didn’t like seeing the boars hurt. Obviously, I got better at it.”
“Let’s not talk about Baleros.”
His hand stilled on the back of my hair. “But we do have to go capture him now.”
I groaned. “I know. We need a plan,” I said, willing my mind to clear from the haze of pleasure.
“We return to London. We find your father to heal the Shadow Fae, and we imprison Baleros in the Tower.”
I cupped his face in my hands and stared directly into his eyes. “And then after we kill Baleros, you will give me a crown of wildflowers, and I will marry you.”
Silence fell. For a moment, my heart stuttered, unsure of how he would respond. Then, an expression I’d never seen on Ruadan’s face before—a completely unguarded smile. “Where I come from, females don’t propose marriages.”
“Pretty sure that’s everywhere.”
“But it’s fitting that you would ask me. And how could I refuse?”
Smiling, I shrugged. “I mean, I wasn’t even really asking, I was just telling you what’s going to happen. And I’m death incarnate. So you really can’t refuse.”
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