by T. K. Rapp
“Hello,” I answered, winded.
“Why didn’t you call me back yesterday?” Millie demanded, and I winced at her tone.
“I’m sorry.”
“I heard about what happened,” she said, softening her voice. “Are you okay?”
“I guess everyone knows.”
“And not one of them is buying that story,” she consoled. “It’s a load of shit.”
“Thanks, Mill,” I groaned, throwing myself onto the couch. “I’m just so pissed. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I mean, I could sit here and wait it out, but what does that get me? And what about River’s Kids? Who’s going to run that?”
“Your best friend who loves you and believes in your vision,” she said timidly.
“Millie?” I asked, choking on her name.
“Don’t hate me.”
“Hate you? Why would I hate you? Are you serious? You’re going to take over for me?” I asked.
“Yes. I’m serious. When I saw you running out the building, I went to Lopez to see what happened, and the first thing I asked was about River’s Kids. He said that the program would be put on hold if we didn’t find someone to step in…so…I did.”
“I love you, do you know that?” I asked as my eyes teared up. “You’re the only one I’d trust to run it.”
“Thanks,” she said.
It was quiet, neither of us knowing what to say. My friends were always there when I needed them most, and I felt incredibly lucky to have them. But this was beyond anything I expected. The time commitment for someone, let alone a new mom, was significant. So I knew that she’d stepped in because she loved me.
“What did Tabor say?” When I didn’t answer, her tone turned scolding. “Dani. You did tell him. Didn’t you?”
“Not really?” I cringed at my own words.
“Not really?” she repeated. “Dani. You either did or didn’t tell him.”
“Yeah. One of those,” I said noncommittally.
“You’re ridiculous. Tell. Him,” she demanded. “He’s going to figure it out anyway. And he needs to know what people are saying.”
“Does he? What good is that going to do?”
“I hate to remind you, but you’re in a relationship now, which means you work it out. To-ge-ther,” she lectured.
“Fine,” I grumbled.
“You know I’m right.”
“I know,” I muttered. “I know, I know, I know. I’m just not sure how to tell him without sounding like the bitter woman I am.”
“That man loves you…and I’m sure he still will when he sees the crazy bitch you’ve been hiding all this time,” she teased. “Time to take off the mask, Dani.”
“Gee, thanks,” I laughed, my mood slightly better.
“So what’s the plan while you’re on vacation?” she asked.
“I have no idea. Maybe some cleaning? Get around to organizing my closet? Funny thing is, when I’m working I look forward to my time off, but this feels like a punishment for something I didn’t do.”
“So do something about it. Don’t roll over and accept the hand you’ve been dealt. Call Lopez. Call the school board. Email Fangurl. Set the record straight.”
“That’s only going to make it worse. Then I go from being the jealous girlfriend to the prima donna who cries when her name is mentioned in an unflattering light.”
“Then talk to Tabor and tell him. Maybe he’s got a better solution.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re right. Thanks, Millie, for everything,” I said, genuinely feeling blessed to have my best friend stand by me.
“Anytime.”
***
By the end of the day, my condo was spotless. I’d cooked dinner, and even managed a shower. I felt like crap, but I didn’t have to look it, so I made the most of my time. At Millie’s prodding, I decided that I would tell Tabor what was going on and hoped that he would have a way of handling things.
“How was your day?” Tabor asked as he walked into the living room.
“Uneventful,” I answered.
“Are you finished setting everything up for school?”
“Not exactly.”
I walked into the kitchen and grabbed two water bottles from the fridge, handing him one and chugging mine in an attempt to brace myself. I had dreaded the conversation all day, and no matter how I’d told myself it would go, I knew my emotions would get me. And in my case, things never went as planned.
A V formed between his brows as he studied me carefully. “Did I do something wrong?”
I scoffed and my lips curved into a sad smile. “I guess you haven’t seen the latest from Fangurl, have you?”
He was still watching me with curiosity, his head turned to the side. “What’s going on?”
Without another word, I brought my laptop over to him and found the offending site to show him the story. He took the device from my hands and set it on his lap, looking from me and back to the computer, utterly confused. It was hard to look at him, so I took a seat on the opposite side of the couch and played with the label on my water bottle.
Tabor’s eyes were scanning the screen, his face impassive. At one point he inhaled sharply and shook his head. From the corner of my eye I saw him glance at me, but I didn’t meet his gaze. And when he finished, he looked angry or disappointed—I couldn’t tell which. He gently set the laptop on the coffee table and moved closer to my end of the couch.
“Damnit, Dani,” he grumbled. “I’m sorry, babe.”
His outstretched arm offered me consolation that I wasn’t sure I wanted or needed at that moment. I felt like the worst person, because I saw the hurt flash across his face when I flinched from his touch. I wanted to take it back, but I was so deep in my own misery that it was hard for me to crawl out of it.
“This isn’t my fault,” he reminded me. Despite my knowledge of that information, I was still upset. “And Fangurl is nothing more than a bitter, angry, lonely person who has nothing better to do.”
“Trust me, I know. But that story is out there. A completely fabricated, malicious lie that has big implications.”
“I wish I could fix it, but this is a side effect of being with me,” he reminded me, as if I didn’t know firsthand.
“This is what I was afraid of all along! The whole reason I wanted to keep us a secret…and now everything is ruined,” I spat, before I was able to take the words back.
“It’s a stupid story, Dani. Stop making a bigger deal about it than it is,” he argued, standing up to move away from me. “It’s like you’re looking for a fight. They’re words. I get you’re upset, but this is ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous?” I questioned, my voice rising as I stood up. “Maybe you’re used to people being in your business and making up stories about you, but I’m not. And these lies can ruin people’s lives.”
“It’s a stupid gossip rag. No one believes that shit!”
“Yeah, well, tell that to my boss, who put me on temporary leave of absence.”
“What?” He took a step back. “When did this happen?”
“Yesterday.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I didn’t want to talk about it. I was sent home before lunch and that’s it.”
“But you still have your job, right?”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t allowed to finish setting up my room, and the school’s been hounded with inquiries for interviews. I guess I was just one hassle they don’t want right now. And I get it. This is a damn circus.”
“Don’t you think you’re being a bit dramatic?”
“No, actually, I don’t. I’m the exact modicum of drama I should be, considering that I might not have a job to go back to.”
“So you can get another job somewhere else,” he suggested. Funny, it was as if he thought jobs just fell from the sky.
“That’s not the point, Tabor. I’m good at what I do. And what about my kids? What about the after-school program that I’ve busted my ass to keep
going? This isn’t just some hobby of mine to pass the time.”
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he said apologetically. “I’m just trying to point out it’s not the end of the world.”
“No, it’s not. But this condo, groceries, and bills don’t pay for themselves,” I argued. “If by some chance they don’t let me come back, I have about three months of savings that I can live off of before I’m up shit creek.”
“Don’t you realize I wouldn’t let that happen? Jeez, Dani…I love you and I want to be there for you. Hell, you don’t have to work. And if you can’t pay for this place, you can just move in with me.”
“Are you kidding me?” I laughed humorlessly. “Just stop.”
“All I’m saying is that there are options.”
“Moving in with you isn’t one of them. I’ve been on my own since I was eighteen—I can take care of myself. And the reason I move in with my boyfriend isn’t going to be because I lost my job. Don’t you get it, Tabor? I love what I do and I don’t want to lose it. And yet here I am, giving it all up for a guy. A guy who gets the shit beat out of him on a weekly basis.”
“You’re back on that again?” he asked, running his hand through his hair. “There’s more to this. What are you trying to say?”
“Just…I don’t know, maybe we need some time apart.”
“Are you breaking up with me?”
I shook my head, my eyes filling with tears at the mere suggestion. I’d never even considered breaking up, because he was a part of me. But so were my students.
“Just a break,” I answered, dropping my gaze to the floor.
“Jeez, Dani, this isn’t some sitcom where time stops while you figure your shit out. A break?”
“Just until the season is over and the attention dies down.” It sounded like a reasonable request. Nothing permanent, but a solution to a temporary issue.
“This isn’t what you want. And I know it’s not what I want,” Tabor argued.
“Please, just give me a little time,” I pleaded as my eyes stung with unshed tears.
“What do you want? Do you want to end this?”
“Of course not.”
“Then drop this break idea of yours. Let’s deal with this like any other couple would.”
“But we’re not any other couple. You’re JT Hunter and I’m just a schoolteacher who fell in love with you.”
I walked to where he stood and noticed his hands were balled into fists, his breathing heavy. He looked completely destroyed, and I realized I’d done that to him. When I reached for his face, he flinched as though my touch alone burned him, and my heart broke.
“I don’t know what the answer is here, but we both have a job to do…and right now I need to focus on trying to get mine back and proving that what we have isn’t going to get in the way of my commitments.”
“And breaking up will prove this how?”
A glimmer of hope sprang up as an idea came to mind. “Maybe we don’t have to break up,” I said with a smile. “We can just ‘pretend.’ Let people believe we’re over and still be together in secret.”
Tabor pried my hands away from him and kissed my knuckles before releasing me, my smile slowly fading. He took a step back and shook his head, and I knew what he was going to say before the words came out.
“I can’t do that, Dani.”
“It wouldn’t be forever,” I said. “Just until all of this blows over.”
“But that’s just it,” he said, leaning down to look into my eyes. “I’d never ask you to hide who we are, and the fact that you even consider this to be a good idea kills me.”
“Tabor, I’m just trying to come up with a solution to get my job back and keep you.”
“And who said you have to choose?” His voice sounded so pained. I did that to him. “Why is it so easy to walk away from us? It’s almost like you’re looking for an out.”
“That’s not true. You’re putting words in my mouth,” I said weakly.
“I don’t think I’ve ever felt as shitty as I do right now.”
He started to walk away, so I grabbed his hand and moved in front of him. “Wait. Just stop, please. Listen to me…I love you.”
I leaned down and he wrapped his arms around me, hugging me against his body. My hands gripped his shirt tightly like he was my lifeline. I lifted my chin and looked at his face, his eyes reflecting his pain. He placed a chaste kiss to my lips before pulling my hands off his body.
“I love you, too, Dani. But I can’t do what you’re asking.”
He walked toward the front door and looked back at me over his shoulder, and my heart sank.
“Tabor,” I called out.
“Good luck with your job.”
With that, he opened the door, and when I heard it shut behind him I collapsed to the floor and sobbed. The pain in his eyes had crushed my soul, and I prayed that I’d be able to make it right, because he didn’t deserve my words. I didn’t want to lose him, and yet he’d walked out the door—and it was all my fault.
C h a p t e r 24
D A N I
Tabor left and all the joy was sucked from my day.
He didn’t call.
He didn’t text.
But neither did I.
It was radio silence and I was miserable without the contact. I kept watching the sports edition of the news, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. The Quakes didn’t do well in their fourth preseason game and the commentators were critical of all the players’ performances—even Tabor’s.
School started and I was still at home, on my couch, biding my time until I could return. I received a glimmer of hope when the latest post from Fangurl Sports was posted.
Hunter’s Back in the Game
You heard us right. And we’re not talking football. A source close to JT Hunter revealed last night that the football star and girlfriend Danielle Miner have called it quits. (Insert BOO-HOO here) But Fangurl is pretty excited by the news, considering we always imagined JT Hunter with someone like Candayce, or maybe even his ex, Natasha. Time will tell.
As for Miner, she’s been in hiding since the breakup and has been a no-show for work. Unverified stories claim that she took a leave of absence, while others claim she was fired. Still, it seems as though the teacher-turned-football-star-girlfriend may have been the one to break up with Hunter. He’s been seen around town sporting facial scruff, sunglasses, and a ball cap. Local reporter Carl Jenkins claims that he and others have been unable to interview the football player and he’s only honored his commitments to the kids that he supports through various hospital charities. Maybe there’s a doctor on-call to mend his broken heart.
This Fangurl person hid behind a persona that was mean-spirited, and yet had tons of followers. I knew, because I was stalking her feed. But I refused to read the comments people left. I’d made that mistake one time, and when I read people bashing me and calling me horrible names, I vowed to never do it again. With one post, she wielded the power to ruin relationships, end careers, and spread lies. And that’s just what she was able to do to Tabor and me.
A week without Tabor was torture, and the only way I could see him was by watching his football games on television. His first regular season game was coming up in a few days, and I was surprised when I got a call from Marta.
“Did I catch you at a bad time?” she asked sweetly.
“No, ma’am. How are you?”
“I’d be a lot better if I knew that you and my son made up,” she said with a laugh. “How are you doing, honey?”
“Honestly? I’ve been better,” I answered. “How is he?”
“Miserable. Dani, I don’t want to pry, and you can tell me to mind my own business, but what happened with you two? He won’t talk about it and I’m worried about him. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tabor more happy than he was with you.”
My heart filled with so much love and hope with her simple words. I couldn’t recall a happier time for myself, and being without Tabor was lik
e a piece of me was missing.
“I said the wrong thing,” I admitted sadly. “I’d just been put on leave of absence at work because of our relationship, and I hurt him so bad. I didn’t mean it.”
“Do you want to be with him?”
“More than anything,” I sighed. “I miss him so much and I don’t know what to do about it.”
“You tell him. Tabor is stubborn and sometimes he forgets that things like relationships can get crushed under the public eye. He doesn’t realize that it’s not the easiest life. But he’s worth the effort.”
“Yes. He is.”
“I’m glad you see it that way,” she said. “Because I have a big favor to ask.”
“Okay,” I said, suspicious of the question.
“I planned on going to the opening game, but Abbi has a meeting with a wedding planner and this is the only weekend she has available for a while. So would you go to the game in my place? I know it’s hard for you to watch him—”
“I’ll be there,” I interrupted, putting her concerns at ease. “I hate watching him get hit, but I love him and I need to show him that.”
“Thank you, Dani. I appreciate it.” It sounded as though our conversation was coming to an end and I realized I needed something else.
“Marta?” She didn’t say anything, so I continued. “Don’t tell him.”
Her sweet chuckle made a genuine smile appear on my face. “It’s our secret.”
“Thank you,” I said before we hung up.
I had a renewed sense of hope that maybe I could repair the damage done. Starting with my job. I put on a bit of makeup and got dressed quickly before making the short drive to River Valley Junior High School. It was only the first week, but I wasn’t going down without a fight. I deserved my job, and if they didn’t want me there, they were going to have to fire me.
Linda, the secretary, spotted me as I entered the double glass doors and gave me a knowing smile.