by Lynn Wolfe
“I really like the wedding dress you have in the window, yet, I just don’t know. I was wondering if you might have any others to show me before I make my final decision. I want to be sure I have looked at everything possible.” Anna stated.
“Susannah, you know I want something that would dazzle Thomas, something perfect! I do like the gown in the display window, better than all the others so far.”
“I’m very sorry, but I don’t believe there are any other dresses available other than the ones you’ve seen.”
Mary opened the door a little wider and saw the girl’s disappointment. After looking closely, to the girl named Anna, she wondered if maybe they weren’t about the same size. As much as Mary wanted to hate both of these women, it wasn’t either of their faults what had happened between her and James. Or the confrontation she had with Thomas.
Besides, Anna was to be her sister-in-law, whether she liked it or not. But what she really wanted more than anything was to see these women up close. She wanted to look over the woman who had won James’s heart. She knew jealousy was not something she was proud to say she had, but the truth was evident, Mary knew she was very, very jealous.
Mary took a long and deep breath and stepped out of the back room. “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation regarding finding a special wedding dress. There is one dress that became available just recently from a client of mine. I think you would look lovely wearing it,” Mary said as she studied both women.
Being close to them Mary found herself amazed at their striking beauty. They had flawless skin and the bluest eyes. Mary could see why any man would take notice of either of these gorgeous women. She tried to avoid looking at Susannah as much as possible. She feared her emotions might give her away. Her biggest fear was being caught staring at the rings that were supposed to have been on her hand–—the rings that had once been full of promises and eternal love.
“How sad, are you sure the bride is willing to part with her dress?” Anna asked, surprised any bride would give up a wedding dress. “I hope the cancellation wasn’t due to some harm happening to either one of the parties.”
Mary sucked in a quick breath. No physical harm, she thought, just a broken heart, a bruised ego and no future happiness to look forward to, while it was evident James was apparently very happy and very much in love. She hadn’t thought about having to explain the circumstances of why the dress was available.
Quick thinking saved her. “It’s due to some unfortunate circumstances that must remain private. I’m not completely sure of the details. If you’d like, you could come with me to look at the dress. I think you’ll find it to your liking.” In fact, Mary knew the sisters would love the dress. This gown was the loveliest dress in all of London, as far as Mary was concerned.
The women followed Mary and waited while she pulled the dress from the closet. With her hands trembling, Mary held the dress for them to judge whether they had any further interest in her gown. She bit her lip and tried to stay focused.
But she wanted to see their faces. Mary glanced briefly at Anna and then landed her stare on Susannah. She then looked down at the beautiful and stunning emerald rings. Mary almost fell apart, for they were far prettier than she had ever pictured.
She knew by their expressions they were both taken back by the sheer beauty of her dress, as she was sure James would have been if she had been given the chance to have worn it.
“This is the loveliest wedding gown I’ve ever seen! In fact, it’s exquisite! May I try it on, please?” Anna asked excitedly.
“Of course, let me help you.” Mary responded with her hands still trembling as she helped Thomas’s betrothed out of her clothing.
“My name’s Anna Webb and this is my sister, Susanna Parker, and you are?”
Again, Mary thought quickly for a reply, “My name is Hope. Here, let me help you with the gown.” Mary prayed her brother had never mentioned her middle name or where she worked.
“Did you make this gown, Hope?”
“Yes,” Mary replied. She didn’t realize Americans were so inquisitive about everything. Most English women would not linger in such conversation, especially with a seamstress.
Susannah stepped up beside Mary to help pull the gown over Anna’s head and to straighten out the skirt. Mary could smell their lovely and expensive perfume. She could never afford such a luxury.
Susannah was much shorter than Mary but showed a confidence that made Mary think she was a strong and knowledgeable person. Mary tried not to feel jealous, but she did. For the emerald rings glittered and Mary noticed they were absolutely flawless. She bit her lip hard and was relieved Susannah was now addressing her sister.
“Anna, the gown is perfect. Look at the back of the dress in the mirror as you turn. I think you have found exactly what you’ve been looking for. This is the perfect gown for you. In fact, it’s by far the loveliest wedding dress I’ve ever seen, anywhere,” Susannah said in awe.
“Hope, I think the dress might need to be taken in at the bust. What do you think?” Anna suggested as she tried to tighten the top of the dress closer to her bosom.
Mary had fought hard not to allow any of her tears to escape, yet a couple had. She could feel her face becoming flushed. She noticed both women were now staring at her with concern and waiting for her to respond.
“Forgive me, I’m so sorry. I always get a little weepy looking at the beautiful brides.” Mary said and hoped she’d covered herself. Mary was pleased how the dress looked on Anna. In fact, it was amazing. Mary knew any other time she would have been bursting with pleasure to be given such wonderful compliments.
For a brief moment, Mary pictured herself wearing the dress. That had been her downfall and she became very weepy. Yet, after a moment, she again found herself composed. She knew she had to get these women out of the shop.
“Yes, I think a little tuck here would fix the problem. The dress is perfect for you.”
“Thank you, you’re very kind. I’m thrilled with this dress. If you could send the bill to the Fairchild Hotel, addressed to Mr. Thomas Ball, he’ll make the payment arrangements. Is it possible for the dress to be sent to the hotel once the account is paid in full and the alterations completed? I believe there might be other purchases made. Isn’t that right, Susannah?”
“Oh my, yes. I’ve found some lovely ball gowns I’d like to try. I fear I didn’t get the long legs my sister was blessed with, but my mother will be able to make the alterations once I have our baby. I’m so glad we came to this shop and thank you for showing us this dress. I think Thomas will be speechless when he sees you wearing it, Anna.”
“I hope not, I want him to be able to say his vows!” Anna said laughing and relieved she had found the perfect gown. “You see, Hope, we’re being wed on my brother-in-laws ship, The Emerald, before we set sail to America, on Friday.”
Mary knew she had to make a reply. What could she possibly say? Her heart was breaking. Why did they have to talk so much? Why did the wedding have to be on The Emerald, where she would have been married on Friday?
With a quivering voice she finally got out, “How lovely, now I must attend to some other work that is pressing, Miss Minnie or Alice can make the necessary alterations for your other dress choices and they can tally your total purchases and send the bills according to your wishes. I hope you enjoy your stay while in London. I’m sure your wedding will be lovely.” Mary turned and opened the door for them to leave and said a quick prayer they would say nothing further to her, ever again. She closed the door as the tears ran down her cheeks.
She knew in her heart she’d done the right thing. She knew she was never going to wear the dress. But that didn’t ease her pain, she hurt deeply. Her hours of hard and dedicated work were going to be worn on another. They were staying at the Fairchild Hotel which was one of the finest hotels in London, and she had never even been inside such a magnificent place, for it was far too costly. Mary would never know the life of luxu
ry she could have had if only James had trusted her.
Mary was envious, and she knew it. Even Thomas was staying in a place that at one time would have been nothing but wishful thinking for either of them. She wondered what he thought of his new found wealth and if he would feel sorry for her, knowing she would never know what it would be like to have such wealth.
Mary knew she had lost the man of her dreams and the chance at a life filled with opportunities far beyond what she had ever imagined. Now she would remain a seamstress struggling to make ends meet.
But Mary decided the only right thing to do was to allow her dress to be a wedding gift to Thomas and Anna. How could she come up with a price to cover the cost of the hours and dreams she had put into her gown.
She would write a note on the bill explaining her gift. Thomas would know she would try to forgive him, someday. But at the moment, Mary knew she would have hate in her heart for many months, if not years, to come, for her father and that bastard James.
Even though she hated Thomas at this moment, giving Anna the gown only made sense. Mary knew her heart would soften someday and she would forgive Thomas, someday in the far and distant future.
Now, she needed to make the alterations for Anna. How cruel was this knowledge that she would be linked to James forever through the fiancé Thomas chose. Mary knew Minnie and Alice would see to the other alterations needed. There was a small alcove they used when the back room was busy. Mary was grateful she would not be disturbed until Susannah Parker and Anna Webb left the shop, for Minnie would never allow them to return to the back room. Minnie would protect her from any further pain if she could.
Chapter Sixteen
“Mary, what were you thinking? Why rush giving away your beautiful dress?”
“I have no need for the dress, and she was simply beautiful in it. Thomas will be pleased.” Mary was hoping Minnie wouldn’t press her on her decision, but it wasn’t to be.
“No one would have looked better than you, Mary. Don’t you think you made a rash decision? Someday, down the road, you’ll find someone else and you may wish you hadn’t sold your gown on impulse.”
“I told you yesterday, I’ll never marry! Besides, even if what you say is true, I would never marry someone in that dress, not the dress I’d made to be married to James. I just couldn’t wear the dress for anyone else.
Mary began to cry. She hadn’t wanted to. But talking about the dress brought back the hurt and pain that again seemed unbearable. She sobbed uncontrollably while Minnie held her close and tried in vain to comfort her.
“I’ve lost everything, Minnie.” Mary said barely audible.
After several minutes passed, Minnie softly spoke, “I’m sorry, Mary. I guess you’re doing the right thing by allowing Anna to wear the gown, it’ll mean a lot to Thomas once he finds out.”
Mary shrugged her shoulders. “I’ll send him a note to offer my congratulations. She’s very lovely. I think I’d like her if I’d have had the chance to get to know her. I wish I could say I hated her sister, but she, too, seemed nice. I could see how James could have fallen in love with her. She’s probably a far better match for James than I could have been anyway, since she’s from America and would know all about life there. She’s everything I’m not. She’s short, petite, and has beautiful blue eyes and that gorgeous blond hair. She’s absolutely stunning. I could tell they came from a family who had money just by the way they handled themselves. And they both seem very happy with their lives.
“I’m so envious of Susannah Parker and everything she has, all the things I ever wanted. I know that it’s wrong to be spiteful, but I wish now I’d never met James Parker. The thought of her having him, his children, and cherishing his love makes me feel a jealousy that I never thought I was capable of.
“When father returns, he’ll get my full wrath. He’ll be sorry for the day he interfered with my life. I hate him, Minnie. I do. May God forgive me? It’s entirely his fault my dreams have been shattered. Well, I suppose not entirely his fault; James and Thomas must take some blame. Men, how quick they judge others before finding out where the truth lies.
“I believe a woman would have wanted to hear all the details before they decided what was true. Don’t you think so, Minnie? At least I would have.”
Mary continued before Minnie could reply. “I, too, shall leave for America the first chance I get. I realize that may take a couple of years. I think it will take at least that long for me to save enough money for my passage and to have enough left over to get a loan to open a dress shop of my own. I know it won’t be anything like your shop, Minnie, but I could survive with at least half the number of your clients.
“Until then, I want to make the most of each day. I realize I need to focus on the present. I shall have a difficult time leaving you and England, Minnie. Maybe you might consider coming to America?”
“Nay, Mary. I don’t think I could ever leave London. But it would do you good to start a new life in a new place. As much as I hate the thought of you leaving, I understand your need to start over. There would be no place in England for you to live without your father finding you. Let’s enjoy each day as it comes and not dwell on the past. It’ll be much better that way.
“Your mother would be proud of you, Mary, and she would understand your need to start a life in America. I shall be glad to help you out with your expenses when the time comes. I’m sure we can find another ship besides those owned by Parker Shipping, for you to make your voyage. Tomorrow will begin your new journey in life.”
Mary nodded. She was lost in her thoughts of starting her shop and life in America. She knew she would remain single for the remainder of her life, as Minnie had when she found herself in a similar situation. She also knew the cost of love and betrayal.
Minnie had shared with Mary that she had once planned to marry. Sadly, he had hidden the fact he was already married. Minnie had given him everything and he had ruined her. Once the truth had unfolded, he wanted to keep her for his mistress, but Minnie would have nothing to do with him after his lies and manipulations. Mary knew Minnie had a difficult time getting over her hurt and humiliation and that had happened almost thirty years ago.
Mary was saddened to think she would never bear children or experience the love of a man. She had wanted to become a wife and mother so badly. Once again, her mind drifted back to James and what she had lost. She felt the tears sliding down her cheeks. When would she ever stop crying each and every time she thought of James? How many tears did she have left to shed for that bastard?”
Chapter Seventeen
Before Minnie arrived to work the next day, she visited the cemetery where Jane Ball lay. On different occasions she visited Jane’s grave to tell her the wonderful things happening in the lives of Thomas and Mary. This morning, however, was more difficult. This time she had to share both Thomas and Mary were in a terrible mess. Thomas happy, but guilt-ridden, as he should be, and Mary, devastated with a broken heart.
Minnie was seated on the worn stone bench at the foot of Jane’s grave. “Jane, sometimes it seems like yesterday when we would laugh and talk about things we were dreaming about in the early portion of our lives. We had so many plans. You had your dreams of living in America and seeing Thomas and Mary grown and married. You had spoke often of getting old and spoiling your grandchildren.
“I’d hoped to be wed to Emil with similar dreams. Neither of us got our wish. Fair or not, life had other plans for us. I don’t want Mary to end up like me, a woman past her prime who has no one to share her life with, all because she fell in love with a rake.
Minnie then related in great detail what had happened in the last few days with Mary, James and Thomas.
“I can hardly bear the thought of her leaving England. She is like my own and she reminds me of you at that age, it will be hard for me to let her go, very hard. I’ve done my best to guide her. I hope you hear her prayers and can somehow comfort her. She’s all alone except for you and me. I don’t
know how I’ll manage once she leaves. I, too, will be left alone. Yet, I don’t dare let Mary know how much her leaving will grieve me. With her soft heart she might stay in England only because she would feel guilty for my circumstances. She needs to start over. I think only then will she begin to heal.
“I wish I knew more about your relationship with Henry. He’s an evil man, Jane. I’ve never understood how you ended up with the likes of him.”
Minnie looked around to see if anyone was visiting the cemetery. To her relief, she saw no one. She would have been very embarrassed if she’d been caught talking to Jane’s stone. When she left the cemetery, she felt no better than when she arrived.
Minnie was glad Jane never lived long enough to see the heartbreak Mary was enduring or the sadness Thomas brought upon Mary and himself. It was the only bright spot in this entire situation.
Chapter Eighteen
London
When Thomas went down to the lobby Thursday morning, he noticed the clerk was waving him to his desk.
“You’ve some messages from the shops your betrothed visited. I believe your fiancé has made exceptional use of her time,” the clerk said mischievously with a smile.
Almost everyone at the hotel knew of the Americans and the wedding taking place on Friday aboard The Emerald. Anna and Susannah talked openly about the upcoming event to everyone on staff they encountered and to some of the other patrons of the hotel.
Thomas nodded at the clerk grinning, “I believe I now need to pay the piper. Thank goodness I’ve already taken care of the hotel bill and our passage back to America. Otherwise, I might be toiling in the ship’s galley working off my debt!”
The clerk laughed and went about his business.
*****
Thomas walked over to the window to open his bills in private. The first one he opened was for a ball gown from the Curtis Dress Shop. Why did Anna need so many gowns? Once they were married he would have to curb her appetite for having so many different outfits. After all, he thought, they lived on a horse farm.