‘I can see that,’ he said faintly. Bereft? She looked anything but bereft. ‘That’s a great outfit!’
She looked down and grinned. She was wearing a soft white frock, but had covered it with a green theatre gown from the hospital linen supply.
On someone else it might have looked ridiculous. It didn’t look the least bit ridiculous on Tess.
‘You don’t have an apron,’ she said accusingly. She looked around the flat. ‘In fact, you don’t seem to have a lot, Dr Llewellyn. Do you believe in a nice, spartan existence?’
‘It’s what I like.’ Holy heck, he was out of his depth here.
‘But you like your dog?’ Someone-it must have been Tess-must have fed Strop, or maybe he’d eaten one pie too many to appreciate the smells Tess was conjuring up. He was lying full length under the table, gently snoring. Now Tess motioned out the window, towards one truly magnificent, hand-built doghouse. It was about four feet in length, painted in gold and red, with magnificent Greek lettering across the front.
“‘Stropacropolis”.’
‘You built that?’ Tess asked, awed.
‘He had a broken hip when I got him,’ Mike said weakly. ‘It was the least I could do.’
‘And, like Jacob, you always do the least you can do. I can see that about you.’ Tessa’s eyes were warm. ‘You know, Dr Llewellyn, I think I’m beginning to like you. Very, very much.’
‘Good. I mean…great.’ Mike clipped his words, desperately precluding further discussion. Domesticity was threatening to swamp him here. The feeling that this was right. That this was how it could be. That he was beginning to like this woman right back…
He walked over and scooped up a finger-load of fried onions, trying to shake off the feeling of unreality. Tess hauled the pan away with the firmness of a matriarch.
‘No, you don’t. Go and wash while I cook the steak. I’ll bet you’re all covered with patient or antiseptic or something disgusting and I won’t have my steak compromised. Do you like it medium or rare? I don’t do well done. It’s a crime to burn meat like this.’ She motioned to Mike’s steaks-two enormous T-bones. ‘We believe in steak in the US but I haven’t seen steak like this for years.’
‘Welcome to Australia, then, Dr Westcott.’ Mike smiled faintly and went obediently towards the bathroom. As ordered. He walked slowly, though, and looked back over his shoulder at the slim girl presiding over his stove in her theatre gown and vivid curls. Good grief!
Mike did more than just wash. He changed from his tailored work trousers to casual jeans and open-necked shirt, taking the time to try and calm his thoughts. He emerged to his kitchenette to find Tess, minus her theatre gown now, attractively demure in her lovely white dress. She looked every inch the hostess as she served up two laden plates, with Mike her invited guest.
And Mike’s pleasant, calm thoughts, which he’d taken such pains to achieve, got all stirred up again. He didn’t speak. Even if he could have thought of something to say, he wasn’t given the chance.
‘Sit down,’ his own personal matriarch ordered. ‘I hope you don’t mind me opening your wine. Hannah gave me the key to your apartment from the nurses’ station. She looked at me every which way when I said we were eating together. Sort of with a “you too” look in her eye. And she wasn’t very nice. Have you two had a relationship?’
Mike’s eyebrows hit his hairline.
‘No! I mean, I don’t see what business it is-’
‘So there’s never been anything between you? Don’t let your steak get cold,’ Tess added kindly, as Mike sank down at the table. ‘It’s fabulous.’
‘No.’ Mike chopped into his steak and took a large mouthful of meat. His eyebrows rose even further. The wine marinade Tess had used on the steak was magnificent. ‘Tessa, this is great.’
‘It is, isn’t it?’ she said warmly. ‘We do steak in the States, but you Aussies do steak!’
‘Not like this we don’t,’ Mike said warmly. The sensation of coming home to this was almost taking his breath away.
‘So tell me why Hannah Hester looked at me like she’d enjoy taking me out at dawn with a pistol apiece-with hers loaded and mine jinxed so it’d blow up in my hand.’
‘I have no idea.’
‘You haven’t gone out with her?’
‘Tessa, I don’t know what business of yours my relationships are. What have you put on this steak? It’s marvellous.’
‘Red wine, garlic, lemon juice and a few herbs. Nothing special.’ Tessa’s face was serious as she spoke and he could see her mind wasn’t on the meat. ‘Mike, Hannah says I should make arrangements for Grandpa to move into the nursing home. She says its impossible for him to stay on the farm and she says I’ll go around the twist here in a matter of months. She thinks I won’t stay.’
‘Yeah?’ Mike sliced another piece of steak and it followed its predecessor. His smile faded to match Tessa’s look of seriousness. Hannah Hester was an interfering busybody whose chief skill was upsetting relatives. If it wasn’t so hard to find good nurses he’d sack her on the spot. And she’d upset Tessa…
The silence continued, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. He watched Tessa’s face as they ate, and finally he probed. ‘Hannah’s really upset you?’
‘Worse than that,’ Tess said. She finished the last of her steak and pushed her plate away. ‘She upset Grandpa by talking right in front of him. She treated him as if he wasn’t there, and any nurse worth her salt knows better than to think stroke victims can’t hear. No matter how paralysed they are.’
He frowned. ‘Tess, Hannah’s a fine nurse.’
‘She might be fine with her clinical skills, but she’s not good with people. In fact, she’s awful.’
Mike sighed. He could only agree. ‘Tess, this place, well, it’s a closed community. I know Hannah’s not great. It’s as if she has a permanent chip on her shoulder and, try as I may, I can never seem to get her onside. I’ll speak to her, but I can’t afford to sack her and she knows it. Well-trained nurses are like hen’s teeth around here. They’re so scarce they hardly exist.’
‘I know that,’ Tess said tightly. ‘That’s the reason-the only reason-I didn’t slug her.’ She cheered up then, and smiled. Heavens, the girl was a real chameleon, changing in front of his eyes. ‘That and the fact that she’s bigger than me.’
‘I see.’ He grinned. ‘I can just see the pair of you, slugging it out in the hospital corridor. Very professional.’ His smile faded again. ‘Seriously, Tess, you need to get along with the only professional staff the valley has. You value their skills, and in time you learn to undo the damage an uncaring person can do.’
‘Yeah.’ Her smile was back again now in force. ‘I know. And I think I did. I told Grandpa he had to get better now, just to prove Hannah wrong. It’s given him another motivation-as if he didn’t have enough already.’
‘See? You’re learning.’
‘Yeah, well, as long as she’s just not being hurtful to Grandpa to get at me. Because she’s jealous.’
‘Well, that’s just plain ridiculous,’ he said firmly attacking his steak again.
‘Why is it?’ she asked slowly. ‘Why is it ridiculous for Hannah to be jealous?’
‘She has a boyfriend.’
‘Did she have one when you first came back here?’
‘No, but-’
‘Then maybe she fell for you.’
‘Women don’t fall for me.’
Tess raised her eyebrows and said nothing. She finished her steak, carried her plate and wineglass to the sink, set her plate down and then stood and eyed Mike thoughtfully as he finished.
He could sense there was something coming here. Something really important. She had that ‘major impertinence’ look in her eye he was beginning to know. This woman didn’t understand the meaning of the word personal.
And finally she said it.
‘You’re sure you’re not gay, Dr Llewellyn?’ She frowned into her wineglass and then fixed him with a speculative lo
ok. ‘I know. You’ve told me you’re not gay, but you’re kind and you’re sensitive and you’re good-looking. You make good money and you drive a smashing car. So how that combination hasn’t been grabbed and held onto…’ She brought her eyebrows together and her eyes probed his-as though sticking an insect on a pin for examination. ‘Are you sure?’
He might have known. He grinned. ‘No, Dr Westcott, I am not gay,’ he said firmly. He rose and carried his plate towards her.
Instinctively Tess took a step back, putting distance between herself and Mike until she had the information she wanted.
‘Are you married, then? Divorced? Widowed? Separated?’
‘Who wants to know?’
‘Me,’ she shot back at him.
‘And what business is it of yours?’
‘None at all,’ she said calmly. ‘But you’re intending to be a working partner of mine and at least one nurse has now insinuated I’m setting my cap at you. I just want to know whether to tell her such a thing is ridiculous. And I’d really like to know that it’s not.’
That was pretty blatant.
He blinked. What was happening here? Mike stared down at Tess and she stared straight back up at him-and he could read her mind like a book. It was almost as if she was propositioning him. If she’d been a man, she’d be buying roses and chocolates and laying siege…
Grabbing!
Whoa…
‘It is ridiculous,’ he said curtly. He gave her a strained look and put his plate on the sink. How the hell was he expected to handle this?
Tessa looked just lovely. Her soft, white dress was low-cut and clinging. Her eyes were huge in her elfin face and the few freckles scattered across the bridge of her nose were immensely-incredibly-appealing. They needed to be kissed.
Whoa!
‘No, Dr Westcott,’ he managed weakly, ‘I’m not married, engaged, widowed, involved or even gay. But neither do I intend to be.’
‘Why ever not?’
‘I’m married to my work,’ he said shortly.
‘I’ve just taken a heap of your work off you. Does that mean I’ll be hauled up before the divorce courts as co-respondent?’
Her voice was gently teasing, but he hardly heard. He stood by the sink and stared at her, fighting for control.
‘There’s more than enough work to keep us both frantic,’ he told her heavily.
‘But I don’t intend to be frantic.’ She lifted her chin. ‘My medicine’s important to me, but it’s not everything. I still intend to look after my grandfather. I still intend to have a life.’
‘My life is my medicine.’
‘I can see that.’ She moistened her lips. She felt strange. As if someone else was inside her body and that someone was a woman she hardly knew. That someone was so strongly drawn to Mike that she had hardly any control at all.
‘It seems such a waste,’ she murmured.
‘A waste?’ He looked sardonically at her. ‘Waste for who?’
‘A waste for me.’
Silence. The words echoed round and round the room, astounding in their simplicity.
‘What on earth do you mean by that?’ he said at last-and then his face closed as if he regretted the question.
Tess also should have regretted her statement. His question was a question Tess shouldn’t be able to answer. She should just mumble an apology-give a silly giggle and get the hell out of here before she made a real fool of herself.
Instead, she took a long, deep breath and met his eyes with a look of pure defiance.
The woman’s role was to stay demure and shy, Mike thought wildly. That was how he could cope. But how could he cope with a woman who was coming on like Tessa was coming on? Like she found him wildly attractive and didn’t care who knew it. Especially she didn’t mind if Mike knew it. She wanted him to know exactly how she felt, and how she felt was written right across her face.
‘I mean that you’re the most attractive male I’ve ever met,’ she said softly. ‘I mean that you’re gentle and kind and caring and I just have to look at you and my knees sort of wobble underneath me. I mean that Hannah got it right when she said that one of the reasons I want to stay here is that I’d like to get to know you better.’
‘She said that?’
‘She said that. And it’s true. Oh, it’s not the only reason,’ she added hastily as his face closed. ‘Of course, I’m staying for my grandfather.’ She took a deep breath, fighting for words. ‘But if you want a partner with knees that don’t wobble, you’d better tell me now that you find red hair a real turn-off. Or that you’re into stamp collecting instead of women.’ She gave a twisted smile. ‘And I don’t believe I’m saying this.’
‘I don’t believe you are either,’ Mike said faintly. ‘Women don’t say these sort of things.’
‘I just did.’
‘Well, no one has before,’ he said bluntly. ‘Tess…’
‘Don’t tell me women don’t find you attractive,’ she shot at him. She took a deep breath and managed a smile. Damn, there was a glimmer behind her eyes that told Mike that a part of Tess was enjoying herself here. She was enjoying knocking his socks off.
And the rest!
Tess put her hands on the kitchen bench behind her and hitched herself up so she was sitting, her lovely stockinged legs swinging free as she watched the man before her. And he stared back at her as if she’d just crawled out of a spaceship!
‘Maybe women have,’ he admitted finally. ‘But no one’s told me.’
‘Aw, gee… Poor little you. Hasn’t anyone told you they find you very sexy?’
And Mike couldn’t help himself. He burst out laughing.
‘Tessa Westcott, you are incorrigible. I thought lady doctors-especially lady doctors trained in emergency medicine and who’ve seen everything the seamier side of life can throw at them-are supposed to be as sensible and hard-headed and as romantic as a brick.’
‘They are,’ she told him, and she grinned right back. She was crazy, but there was a very strong part of her that was enjoying being crazy. She’d just burned her bridges back to the States. In fact, she’d just abandoned a very sensible career plan and a very sensible boyfriend, albeit a very lukewarm one. If she wasn’t a little crazy tonight, then she never would be.
‘They say the only thing a sensible, committed female doctor with career ambition should love is a goldfish,’ she said blithely. ‘But I’ve thought it through, and I think you’re much better than a goldfish.’
‘Gee, thanks.’ Mike looked at her for a long moment, and then walked two steps forward and took her hands in his. He had to make her see. ‘Tess, this is crazy.’
It wasn’t crazy at all. Taking her hands was a mistake. A huge mistake! The craziness disappeared right then and there as their hands touched.
‘Crazy or not, it’s the way I feel,’ she said. Heaven knew how she kept her voice light, but somehow Tess managed it.
‘Well, stop feeling like it.’ He released her, but he didn’t move. They were only inches apart, but Tessa’s eyes were just above his from her perch on the bench. Hell, how to make her see that this link-what she said she could feel and what he could definitely feel-was totally, absolutely out of the question.
‘Tessa, what I’m saying about work is true,’ he managed. ‘That’s all I want. I have room for nothing else.’
‘I’m very small,’ Tess murmured. ‘Couldn’t you squash me in around the edges?’
‘No.’ He stopped smiling completely and took a step back. His face said the joke had gone far enough.
‘You’re not a priest,’ Tess said gently. ‘I’d love to know why you have room in your life for nothing but medicine.’
‘I’ve seen what can happen when people forget their responsibilities.’
‘I’m not asking you to forget your responsibilities.’ Tess, too, had stopped smiling now. She jumped down from her bench and stepped forward-stepped forward so she was almost touching him. Her face said she had gone this far so she
might as well try the whole bit.
‘Mike, I’m not asking you to marry me,’ she said, and somehow she forced her voice to stay light. ‘What I’m saying is that there’s something between us. Something…’ She shrugged. ‘I don’t know what. It’s a feeling I can’t define. It’s a feeling I’ve never felt in my life before and I want, more than anything, to explore it. That sounds wanton, doesn’t it? As if I’m a loose woman. I’m not, Mike. I’m just… I just feel…’
And then her voice firmed, as if she was suddenly sure of her ground.
‘I feel as if you’re a part of me. That’s crazy, isn’t it? But that’s the way it is. So, tell me, Mike,’ she demanded. ‘Tell me that I’m a fool. Tell me that you feel nothing.’
‘I don’t want-’
‘I’m not asking what you want. I’m asking what you feel.’
And then, before he could answer, she took one more step forward, put her arms up around his neck, stood on tiptoe-and she kissed him for all she was worth. And it was done so suddenly that there was nothing he could do to stop it.
It was some kiss.
It was a kiss of pure bravado, but it was more than that. It was a kiss that was full of questions, and it was a kiss full of wonder.
Tess had never done such a thing in her life before. Her act might have seemed wanton-forward-but there was nothing of that in her kiss. Her lips were gentle, sweet and unsure, as if she really wanted to touch him. It was as if her body was drawn to him like a bee to honey, and she was half expecting to be drawn so far into the sweetness that she’d drown.
And he…
The last thing he wanted to do was to kiss this woman. He didn’t. And yet her lips were touching his and her body was soft and yielding and…and so lovely!
When her mouth touched his, the kiss slammed home the knowledge that this was something outside his ken. She was so desirable…
Sure, he’d kissed other women. Hell, he’d made a vow, but that vow hadn’t been one of chastity. His vow had been one of emotional detachment. He’d made love to women before, but they’d always known the rules. No involvement. There had never been any promises of tomorrow. There was only passion on his terms.
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