by Robin Roseau
"You hold a place in my heart, too."
"Yes, but her place is more special, and so there shouldn't be a rush to introduce her, then me. Introduce me first, and then if your mother wishes a little more time with Violet, it appears natural."
"Oh. I understand."
"You will then do the same thing with your sister. You should warn them that you will introduce them individually."
"I understand," I said.
"This may not be the human way, but it is the Catseye way."
"You may want to prepare your sister before you arrive," Azalea added. "If she wishes a hug."
"Right," I said. I smiled. "Unless she has grown substantially, she can fit into my clothing. I'm going to give her one of my blouses. Is there somewhere she can change while maintaining her modesty?"
"We'll show you tomorrow," Azalea said. "So we are agreed?"
"We're agreed." Inside, I felt all gooey. "I keep thanking all of you, but I'm going to do it again. Thank you."
"You are welcome, but why are you thanking us?"
"This time, for taking such care of my family."
"As far as we are concerned," said Azalea, "they are our family, too."
And tears began leaking from my eyes at that. "Thank you," I whispered.
Violet leaned over and set her head on my shoulder, and we were quiet while I let my emotions settle down.
"I'm sorry I do that," I said quietly.
"Do not be. We do not have the same reaction, but we know it is an outpouring of emotions," said Bluebell. "It is very touching. You feel grateful to us, but we are so far from our home world, surrounded by humans, many of whom fear us. If Catseye reacted the same way when we were emotional, there would be more tears here tonight, and even more tomorrow."
"Maybe you didn't see," said Posey. "We have the same reaction, but it is with our tentacles."
"We don't leak," said Azalea. "But we quiver."
"I'm learning the different quivers," I said. "I have a lot more to learn."
"You do," agreed Bluebell. "There is time."
"There is time," I agreed.
* * * *
Later, in my bedroom, dressed for bed, I said to Posey and Violet, "Please tickle me."
I didn't have to ask twice.
* * * *
It would take days to write about the visit to the United Nations. I will be brief.
The E.T.s had two entire floors in one of the buildings. Azalea was not the leading diplomat for the E.T.s, but judging by her office, she was exceedingly important.
Posey was a member of her staff, although she didn't work directly with her mother. It was Azalea's department that handled the coordination between humans and the E.T.s. Azalea explained it like this.
"When the president is going to visit another country, there are months of negotiations that happen first. Every detail is agreed upon ahead of time. The logistics are enormous. Well, Catseye are very, very good at handling logistics. So that's what we do."
Violet and I spent the day shadowing Azalea, with Posey explaining quietly to me when I had questions. We got a tour of the facilities, a more detailed tour of the two floors occupied by the E.T.s, and an introduction to some of the aliens.
I met Amaryllis, the BP who had first addressed the United Nations. I was actually a little rude. I stared up at her. Up, and up, and up. She was very tall. But I was speechless, as of all the ETs, she was the most famous, almost mythical.
She was kind. "Does my height shock you?" she asked, speaking perfect English.
"I'm sorry," I said. "Do you know the English term star struck?"
She offered a sound, and Posey whispered to me, "Mirth."
"Yes, I know this term," said Amaryllis. "And there is no fear?"
"Fear I'm making a fool of myself," I said. "Fear of you? No. Gratitude, though. But mostly just star struck."
She offered the sound again. "Humans always have questions. What is your biggest question?"
"How can I help?"
"Help?"
"You're here for a reason. Perhaps more than one."
"And you wish to help."
"If I can."
She switched to Catseye and spoke to Azalea. She actually spoke somewhat slowly and very distinctly. "Tell me about this human."
Azalea glanced at me, then responded, also clearly. "She is young and attending university. Bluebell and I have adopted her into the family."
"What is she studying?"
"She is new at school and has not decided."
"Has she been Tested?"
"She and my daughter have declared love," Azalea said.
"Which daughter?"
"Violet." Of course, she used Violet's Catseye name, which I couldn't come close to pronouncing, but I knew all their Catseye names by now.
"Pity. Posey would have worked better for us." Amaryllis looked at me again but continued to speak careful Catseye. "Can her studies be steered?"
"In what direction?" I asked, speaking my horrible Catseye.
The BP actually reared backwards away from me. "That was Catseye!"
"Do you understand through my accent?"
She shifted her posture then looked back at Azalea. She switched back to English. "Did you understand every word we said?"
"I believe so. In what direction would you steer my studies?"
"Political science."
"My wife hopes for her to study business," said Azalea.
"Of course she does," said Amaryllis. She turned back to me. "I wish you to study political science. I also wish you to take an internship here during your breaks from school."
"We will need to find work for which we can pay her," Azalea said. "She has financial needs. And I am unsure my wife will release her. She has first claim."
"Yes, yes," said Amaryllis. She leaned closer to me. "Azalea Beamer has not answered my question. Perhaps you will. Can your studies be steered?"
"I am young," I said. "I do not know what I will be good at. I do not know what I will like. Jasmine Brighteyes told me the most important thing is to study what interests me, to study areas in which I can find passion. Do you disagree with her advice?"
"You know Jasmine Brighteyes sufficiently well that she offers her advice."
"Jasmine Brighteyes has a claim that predates my wife's," said Azalea. "But she has kindly accepted an equal co-claim."
"Well, well," said Amaryllis. "No, as inconvenient as it is, I cannot fault Jasmine's advice. But you asked how you could help, and I believe I have answered you. I may offer a different answer if you ask again in the future."
She turned to Azalea. "I require status reports on this human."
"Of course," agreed Azalea. "If my wife allows it, I will arrange a position here."
Amaryllis turned back to me. "In my office. Pay her whatever she needs. Tell me, Ms. Andrews. If I offer to pay you twice whatever Bluebell Beamer offers you, will you come to work for me?"
I smiled. "I will do what Bluebell and Azalea tell me to do."
"And if they both offer you positions?"
"I will ask that you not bribe me."
"Why is that?"
"Because if I accept your offer, I will always wonder if I accepted it for the money, and I will never be sure I didn't. And I will not have kind views of myself if I decided it was the money that made my decision, and not the position itself."
"My wife holds the claim," Azalea said.
"Of course," said Amaryllis. "Please tell your lovely wife I wish this human to work in my office, but I will accept her decision. Perhaps we can share." She turned to me. "Perhaps if we share, it will help you decide your studies. Perhaps you could study both business and political science."
"Perhaps I might enjoy biology more than either."
"Is that so?"
"I don't know if it's so," I said. "I'm young. What do I know?"
She offered her sound of mirth again. She leaned closer. "I can be very, very convincing."
I s
miled.
"Azalea Beamer, I wish this human Tested."
"You should know," I said, "that this human knows what Testing is for."
"And you should know, young human, that Testing is about more than what you believe. I want you Tested."
"I believe," said Azalea, "that you should work with Jasmine Brighteyes, not against her."
Amaryllis straightened. "Of course. I wish to spend more time with you, Ms. Andrews, but my aides are turning apoplectic with the damage to my schedule. Azalea Beamer, please arrange it."
"Of course."
She offered her hand, and we clasped, my hand buried inside hers. I looked way up at her. "Amaryllis, I hope the next time we meet, you will teach me how to greet you properly." I looked at her hand. "I believe this is a human greeting."
"Then I shall," she said.
* * * *
Later, once we were in the jumper and well away from D.C., I said, "Azalea, did I make a fool of myself today?"
"Not that I saw," she said. "Did you trip over your shoes when I wasn't looking?"
"I meant with Amaryllis."
"Ah. You couldn't tell she was impressed?"
"I don't understand that, either. I'm nothing special."
"That isn't true."
"I'm cute, but I'm not gorgeous. I'm sort of smart, but not brilliant. The most obvious thing about me is that I'm bubbly and friendly. A lot of people think I'm a bubblehead when they first meet me. I'm not sure they're wrong."
"What is bubblehead?"
"A dumb blonde. A bimbo. Vacuous."
"And you wonder if they're right?"
I shrugged. "Sometimes."
"Well, aside from the stereotype about blondes, you are not a bimbo. Or a bubblehead."
"Compared to all of you I'm practically an idiot," I said. "You're all brilliant with your Ph.D.s and your seventy four languages and your phone calls when you're not holding a phone."
"There are different kinds of intelligence, Skye. Can you arrange a vase of flowers?"
"You put the flowers in and move them around until you're happy. I'm not an artist, though."
"Well, I can't arrange a vase of flowers, but I am now giving you another household responsibility. Do you think you can add artwork, and for special occasion, flowers?"
"Violet and Posey said you can appreciate art."
"A great deal," she said. "But we can't envision it."
"I'd love to help," I said. "But you could hire someone who would do a lot better job than I would."
"We did hire someone," she said. "But that person cannot choose art that has special meaning to us. And that person isn't offering to arrange flowers for us."
"All right," I said. "I can do that. But I still don't understand why everyone is making such a big deal of me. I'm nothing special."
"You're very special to this family."
"When I first spoke with Jasmine, she didn't want me. She said my tests were at best, borderline. I don't understand what changed her mind, but I think I was really just a warm body."
"You are far more to her than that," Azalea said.
"Why? Why did Amaryllis want me to work for her?"
"You impressed her. She makes that offer to every human she meets, to answer a question. Most ask, in one fashion or another, how they can get more from us, or why we don't do more."
"I might have, but you have already explained. You want us self-sufficient and more mature."
"Fine, but you could have asked any of the questions other humans asked. Instead you asked how you can help."
"I bet I'm not the first."
"No. We get frequent offers. But you asked while in my company, and the affection we share for you is obvious in our stance towards you."
"So she was interested because of you."
"Partly. Being able to speak Catseye almost as good as she can didn't hurt your cause, either."
I snorted. "Her accent is better."
"Still... Skye, you are right in much of your analysis, but you are skipping something. You said you are bubbly and friendly. You are also a natural diplomat."
"I hate lying. Isn't diplomacy just the art of lying with a smile?"
"That can be one aspect. Being able to speak difficult truths is another aspect of diplomacy. Making someone feel comfortable in a strange setting is a very important aspect of diplomacy."
"She wants me because I'm friendly."
"She wants you for a lot of small reasons, not for any single big reason."
"All right. What if I want to work with Violet instead?" I turned to her. "You'd like being my boss, wouldn't you?"
She laughed. "Yes, but I think it would be a very bad idea."
I was hurt. "Why?" I demanded.
"Because we wouldn't get any work done, Skye."
"Oh. All right then. That might be true."
Ahead of us, Posey snorted.
* * * *
Later, over tea, Azalea said, almost casually, "We had an interesting day today."
Bluebell set down her mug and looked at her wife carefully. "You said that very casually, which means it wasn't casual at all."
"Our human met Amaryllis." Bluebell's tentacles began twitching. "She wants Skye to study political science."
"You just had to introduce them," Bluebell said, and I thought it was said sharply.
"It wasn't my fault. One of her spies told her I had a human today, and she set herself in our path. If that hadn't worked, she might even have deigned to step into my offices."
The words were in Catseye, and I had to puzzle through them for a minute, but everyone watched me while I figured it out.
"She offered me a job," I said in a small voice.
Bluebell actually slammed a tentacle on the table. "Of course she did. It wasn't enough she stole daughter number two from me. Now she wants daughter number three."
"Daughter number two?"
"She means me," Posey said. "I was all set to study business."
"I'm daughter number three?"
"Yes," said Bluebell. "I presume you accepted."
Azalea relayed the rest of the conversation, and Bluebell calmed down marginally, calming even more when Azalea told her that I'd said I'd do what the two of them told me to do.
"I got her back for you, Bluebell," Azalea said.
"Oh?" The tentacles waved. "Do tell."
"Well, Skye helped," Azalea added. "She tried to talk to me about her so the human wouldn't understand."
Bluebell laughed, her tentacles all waving. "She spoke Catseye." She laughed again. "And her Catseye is..."
"Very careful and precise," I offered.
"Ah, the diplomat speaks again," Azalea said, translating the word for me.
"Yes," agreed Bluebell. "Did you understand her?"
"Every word."
Bluebell grinned and thumped the table again. "Excellent."
I switched to English. "If you two don't get along, I don't want to work for her. Please don't make me."
Both Bluebell and Azalea turned to me, their gestures softening. "It's a friendly competition," Bluebell said. "I am frustrated because she likes to meddle, and she is better at it than I am."
"Then I should help you win."
"No. We will make the best choices for you. Do you understand me?"
"Yes, Bluebell," I said submissively.
"This is a friendly competition, not that different than when Posey attempts to steal you during Boardwalk."
"You're sure?"
"I'm sure." She turned back to Azalea, who relayed the rest of the conversation. Bluebell appeared to think for a minute, then nodded. "We will not resolve this now." She turned to me. "What do you want, ignoring the competition?"
"I need a job," I said. "I thought I'd have to go home and be a waitress."
"Clearly you have other choices."
"All of which sound better than the money I make waiting tables."
"So this is about money for you?"
"No. I like waitre
ssing. I meet people. That's how I met Sapphire Fletcher and Dr. Moirai. If I hadn't, I don't think I'd be here now. But I thought that was about as good a job as I'd ever have. Sure, maybe I'd become a shift lead or something. But all that changed, and it keeps changing."
"So, what do you want?"
"I don't know. I want help figuring out what I should do with my life. I think you've been offering that."
"Yes, we have," she said. She paused. "You have very good reasons for not wanting to work in the Testing Center. Unless that changes, then working at the United Nations is the best choice for you. How do you feel about that?"
"I'd work at the Testing Center if you wanted me to," I said, but I was sure I wasn't convincing.
"There will be more summers. We'll see. How do you feel about working at the United Nations?"
"I don't know how to do anything. I bet all I end up doing is running errands or something. Don't you have robots that do a better job than I would?"
"So you're worried you'll be bored."
"I don't know why she wants me, but I don't know what I can do. I don't know anything."
"Can you do whatever she asks and appear cheerful, even if it's dull?"
"Yes."
"Then I hope she gives you dreadfully dull work," said Bluebell. "And we can put that little distraction to bed." She snorted. "Political science." Tentacles waved.
Azalea snorted her own laugh.
Exam
It was two hours later that Violet told me, "They're fifteen minutes out." She and Posey had been distracting me by teaching me Catstone. I'd been absorbed in the game, which had served to calm my nerves.
Soothing Catseye tentacles hadn't hurt, either.
We stood. Posey offered to put the game away, but she asked, "Did you like it?"
"I think so. I won't be very good."
"But you'll play anyway?"
"Yes. Can we bring it with us?"
"Yes." She smiled broadly and stroked me with a tentacle tip. "How do I look?"
"You look nervous. Why?"
"If you think I look nervous, take a good look at your girlfriend."
I turned to Violet, and her tentacles, the ones that weren't around me, were waving wildly. "What's going on?"
"We're meeting your family," Posey said. "I'm nervous, but Violet is terrified."
"Oh, honey," I said. I pulled her into a hug, and she wrapped around me tightly. But she didn't taste. I didn't worry about that. "I hope they love you, but if they don't, I still will."