Plenty, he told himself a few minutes later when Brian began whimpering again. Maybe the thing to do was to tell him what had happened and why he should be happy for Allie. It would be a heck of a lot better than going on saying it to himself. He went across the street and into the town square, found a bench in a sun-dappled spot beneath some trees, sat down and pulled the stroller close to him.
“Here’s the deal, Brian. You love Allie and she loves you.” She loves me, too. She told me she loves me. She wouldn’t have made love with me if she didn’t, and heaven help me, I love her more than my own life, I want her, I need her.
Brian’s eyes had opened wide at the sound of Allie’s name. “But she needs more out of life than being a nanny. She’s smart, Brian, really smart. She needs a career. She needs the self-satisfaction of knowing she’s helping more people than just us. Unhappy people who will feel better after they talk to her.”
Just the way I do. And I need to talk to her now, need her with me when I read that letter.
Brian’s face screwed up. “I know, I know,” Mike said quickly. “You’re unhappy, too, and I admit it, kiddo, I’m not happy myself, but we can’t ask Allie to come back and save us. She has her own work to do.”
Brian frowned deeply, and Mike began to feel desperate. “We have to let her do it,” he insisted. “Maybe someday she can come back, when she’s a full-fledged psychologist. Maybe she’ll decide to set up an office in town and live with us. Who knows? Whaddaya think about that, huh?”
Nothing good, it was clear. He leaned closer to the boy, who instantly grabbed the points of his collar with both hands and tugged, putting all his strength into it, and glared ferociously at Mike.
“You think I should have tried harder? You think I should have figured out a way for her to stay with us and still have a professional life? You think I should have told her we’d wait for her, we’d be grateful for any time she could give us?”
Still glaring, still keeping a stranglehold grip on Mike’s collar, Brian yelled, “Da.”
Mike felt stunned. “Did you just say Da?” Did he dare to hope? “You said Dad?”
Without thinking, he reached into his pocket for his cell and punched in Allie’s number. She answered, her voice as beautiful, as musical, as appealing as ever.
“Brian just said Da,” he blurted out. Realizing what he’d done, he pushed the End button with his thumb, then turned the phone off.
His first thought had been to call Allie. Of course. She was the first person he wanted to know that this stupendous thing had happened. Even before he told Daniel or Ian.
Brian was trying to take the phone away from him, protesting, babbling and still glaring at Mike. Mike gazed at him, feeling something warm and bubbly rise up inside, stirring his heart, tightening his throat, making his eyes feel hot.
All at once, he knew what it was. He was consumed with love for this determined child, the love he hadn’t wanted to admit to himself until now. He no longer cared why his father had left Brian to him, he cared only that Evan had done it, and for that, Mike was grateful. Loving Brian had dimmed his resentment toward his father. He could read that letter, and whatever it said, he could survive it. He could leave that dark side of himself behind, forever.
“That’s right, Brian. I’m your dad.” He picked up his baby and hugged him close. One day he’d have to explain to Brian that they were brothers, but for now, he was his son. Mike loved him and wanted Brian to love him in return. He wanted Brian to have the best life any boy could have. He didn’t even care if Brian learned to cook. He just wanted him to be happy.
And he loved Allie. God, how he loved Allie. And she loved him, and Brian…What had he been thinking?
“You’re right,” he said to Brian, putting him back into the stroller. “I’ve been a complete idiot.”
Brian, having no idea what he was talking about, looked up at him and smiled. Mike grabbed the handles of the stroller and ran to the Hendricks’s house, with Brian shrieking, this time in delight.
Elaine Hendricks wasn’t at home, or if she was, she wasn’t letting him in. Disappointed, he said to Brian, “At least we tried.”
Now he didn’t feel like running. His feet felt like lead as he went back to the diner. “We’ll find Allie eventually,” he assured Brian. “It won’t be long before I run into Elaine on the street, or maybe she’ll come to lunch.”
Back in the diner, he went directly to his office, where the fax from Ritter caught his eye. He put the cover sheet behind the note—the original had been handwritten—and began to read.
Dear Mike:
I write this letter knowing you may tear it up without reading it, and I wouldn’t blame you. When Brian was born, when I saw how much Celine loved him, how much time she spent with him, how she thought of our nanny as a babysitter for when she had to go out, not as a replacement mother, I realized how empty of affection your childhood was, and I felt ashamed.
Mike’s eyes widened. What was this?
I hired a private investigator, found out where you were and learned what you’d accomplished in spite of the lonely childhood your mother and I gave you. I learned that you created your own family with two fine men, Daniel and Ian, a family who love and care about each other. I felt such pride in the man who’d always been inside you, a strong man with a good heart, and again I felt that shame, shame that I hadn’t worked hard to bring that out in you when you were just a boy. Your life would have been so different.
It is for all these reasons that I’m appointing you guardian of Brian in the unlikely event of Celine’s and my death. Somehow, in spite of your experience with neglectful parents, you’ve learned to love and care, and if I can’t love and care for Brian, I trust you to do for him what I should have done for you.
Please forgive me.
Your father,
Evan Howard
Stunned, Mike read the letter again. “A person he trusted,” Lilah had said, and he’d laughed at her. Hot, burning tears blurred the words he stared at.
Hearing a commotion in the kitchen, he wiped his eyes, put down the fax and picked up Brian, who’d begun to fuss again, from his playpen. Together, they went out to see what was going on.
What was going on was Barney, smiling sheepishly, with Elaine Hendricks, who was holding her left hand to Colleen and Becky while they shrieked with delight.
“Look at her ring,” Becky crowed. “She and Barney are getting married.”
Mike glanced at the ring. “Very nice. Congratulations, Barney. Elaine, where’s Allie?”
The kitchen fell into silence. Elaine took back her hand and stared at him. “She’s…she’s in Burlington,” she said at last.
“Where in Burlington?”
“She didn’t want anybody to know where she was until she got things settled.” Elaine looked longingly at Brian, who reached out for her.
“I can’t wait until she gets things settled,” he said, “I have to talk to her now. In person.”
“I promised her,” Elaine said, pleading with him to understand. “She has to have time alone to work things out.”
“Elaine,” Mike said, calming down enough to look her straight in the eyes, “do you want me to find Allie?”
Her gaze dropped to the kitchen floor. Then she looked back at Mike and put her finger to her lips. Reaching for one of his order pads, she scribbled on it and handed it to him.
On it was an address.
Mike gazed at her. “I get it,” he said softly. “You didn’t tell me.” He threw his arms around her and hugged her, because, after all, she was going to be his mother-in-law, sooner, he hoped, rather than later.
“I have to leave,” he told his surprised staff. “We may be serving scrambled eggs at the benefit tomorrow night, but I have to leave.”
A few minutes later, he and Brian were in the car heading for the freeway, where he drove as fast as he thought fathers were allowed to—slightly under the speed limit.
ALLIE STARED at her p
hone. Mike had called her. But he’d hung up after telling her what Brian had done.
Hoping he’d just lost service, she called him back, but got his voice mail. He didn’t want to talk to her. He might have called her by accident—had her number programmed and pushed the wrong button, that it was Daniel, not she, with whom he wanted to share the big news.
She missed them so much she hurt. Could she stand to see them tomorrow night at the benefit?
For the past several hours, she’d been alternating among crying, filling out endless application forms and blotting the tears off the application forms. She stood to pour another cup of tea and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror over the sink. She was a wreck, her hair hanging lank and uncombed, no makeup and wearing the gray sweatsuit from her high-school days, her comfort symbol. I’ve turned into a slob.
But who did she have to dress up for?
Was she doing the right thing in going back to school? Mike had left her no other choice, had he? With each bit of information she’d gathered, she’d been more sure of her career choice, and less sure she could stand being away from Mike for even another hour, much less the time her coursework and training would take. But it would be worth it, she told herself stubbornly. And then immediately she thought, “Worth leaving Mike and Brian?”
And she went back to crying.
The banging on the door startled her. Swiping madly at her eyes, she opened it. On the stoop stood Mike, Brian squirming on his hip, smiling, burbling and trying to reach out for her.
She wouldn’t let herself reach for him. “Mike? What are you doing here?”
“We’re here to stay,” Mike said, barging through the door, “if you can love a man as stupid as I am.” He faced her. His eyes were wild, and she wondered if he realized he was still wearing his white chef’s jacket.
She was too shocked to speak. She could only stare at him.
“I was an idiot to let you walk out on me,” he said. “I sat there and let you do it because I was afraid to be any closer to you, afraid my wall would fall down—”
“Your wall? Mike, what are you talking about?” Had she hurt him so much he’d lost his mind?
“I’ve lied to you, to everybody in the valley. Brian isn’t the child of an old friend. He’s my father’s child. I haven’t told you who I really am.”
She could only listen silently as the story spilled out of him, his childhood, his time in juvenile detention, his bond with Daniel and Ian. “They’re the only people I trust, the only people I haven’t built walls against. But the wall I’d built between you and me, well, I felt it starting to crumble—until you said you didn’t want to be with me anymore. My pride took over. I refused to beg you for love.”
“Oh, Mike—” Tears overflowed her eyes. She had made the wrong decision. She knew that now, from her own misery and his. “You have my love. More love than you’ve ever had in your life. But I didn’t know how we could work this out. It wouldn’t be good for Brian to have me popping in and out of his life. Not good for us, either, so I—” She couldn’t hold back any longer, and threw her arms around him and Brian, who still clung, wide-eyed, to Mike.
“I have it all figured out,” he said, not returning her hug, just barreling on, not giving her chance to say no. “I’ll franchise the diner, so money won’t be a problem. Maury and Barney will keep the restaurant going in the right direction under new management. Brian and I will move here—” he glanced around Suzy’s tiny apartment “—and start looking for a larger place, maybe a house with a yard. You’ll go to school, I’ll take care of Brian and cook spectacular dinners for you. Every night you’ll come home to us. That’s all we want, whatever time you can give us.”
He gazed at her pleadingly. Relief that the saddest time of her life was coming to an end, plus a fierce and passionate love for both of them welled up in her heart. “I don’t know,” she said.
“Don’t know what?” Now he looked desperate, but she hadn’t fooled Brian. He was chortling and doing his best to clap his hands.
“Don’t know if I like your plan.”
His face fell. “No?”
“No. In the first place, you can’t move in here. It’s not my apartment. In the second place, you’re not certain you want to franchise the diner. So what I was thinking…”
The way he was looking at her made her so sorry she’d hurt him that she hugged him tighter. Now that she was close enough, Brian took the opportunity to grab her hair and hang on to it as if it was a tree limb at the edge of Quechee Gorge.
They needed her, both of them, and depended on her. It was an effort not to burst into tears and throw herself at Mike’s feet, begging for forgiveness. Instead, she forced herself to sound casual, as if the conversation hardly mattered to her at all.
“We’d stay in LaRocque, and you could stay with the diner whether you franchised it or not.”
She felt the jolt that ran through him. “I found out I could arrange my classes so I’d only have to be here three days a week, and I’m sure Mom would take care of Brian while I’m gone. In fact, I think you’d have to hang her on a tree like a sap bucket to keep her from taking care of Brian.” She guessed it was her turn to talk nonstop. “When you think the diner’s under control enough for you to leave town, the two of you could be here with me, in a fairy-tale cottage with a picket fence or in an igloo. I don’t care.”
His face was so full of tentative hope that she felt that surge of love again. “Allie, are you saying…”
“Yes,” she said crossly while snuggling her head into his shoulder, “I’m saying I was wrong. I’m saying that after I’m certified, I can’t think of a place I’d rather set up a practice than in the valley. I’m saying—”
He cut her off with his kiss. With Brian’s burbling sounds in their ears, they kissed as if they’d been apart for years and had just now discovered each other again.
Mike put Brian down on the floor and surrounded her with his strength and goodness and his love for her. If anybody could make it work, they could, because they couldn’t make anything work without each other.
MIKE HAD a couple of questions on his mind, and as soon as he was able to let go of Allie, and as soon as they got Brian snuggled up for a nap, he decided he’d better address them before they went home to the furor of getting ready for the benefit the next night.
“Do you want another child?” he asked her, his mouth drifting over her ear.
He felt her delicious shiver. “As soon as I’m out of school, I’d love to have a baby with you.”
“What about a linebacker-sized child, right now.” He kissed her forehead and nuzzled her hair, and was startled when she leaped out of his arms.
“You want to adopt Maury,” she said breathlessly. Her eyes were shining. “Oh, Mike, I was so hoping you would. He loves you so much. He already loves Brian, and Brian worships him. Oh, yes, yes, I would love to be Maury’s mother. And Brian’s. I’ll adopt them both.”
He pulled her back to him. “I’m Brian’s brother and his father,” he whispered into her ear. “It will be complicated.”
“We’ll work it out. Right now, you’re a daddy.”
“And about to be a husband, I hope,” he said, the idea setting off a wave of desire he’d act on as soon as he could. “One more thing,” he said. “What shall we do about franchising the diner?”
She leaned back to look into his face. Those luscious brown eyes glowed at him, and a smile turned up the corners of her mouth. “Let’s not,” she said.
“Just what I wanted to hear,” he said, and kissed her.
THE RECREATION room at the center glowed with candlelight and fall color. Dressed in their best, residents of the valley filled the tables to capacity. The sounds of their conversations and laughter filled the space with warmth and friendship.
Elaine was there, with her left hand extended. Allie smiled. Her mother had paid her back big-time. Her engagement to Barney, even the fact that they’d been seeing each other, had
come as a total surprise.
“Planning to run away to Vegas?” Allie had asked, teasing her.
“Not this time, sweetheart. I’ve been thinking about Barney for three years.”
Between dinner and dessert Daniel gave a short speech, thanking everyone for his or her support. Lilah spoke next, thanking the volunteers for their work. One by one, her committee heads came to the podium to thank their own volunteers.
It was Allie’s turn. Glowing inside with happiness, she took the stage, thanking her people for flowers, plants and setting the tables. While she spoke, she scanned the room. It looked beautiful. The string quartet had only missed a few notes and broken one string. The meal had been—
Now was the glorious moment she would get to thank the most important people in her life. “Lilah, would you bring out the chefs?”
Lilah was already tugging Mike and Maury, both of them protesting, out of the kitchen. Allie observed that it was Maury who held Brian—exactly as Mike did, on his left hip.
They stood together on the dais, the four of them, while the audience gave them a standing ovation. Allie glanced at their faces. They knew. They knew they were looking at a family, and it hadn’t even been a family until yesterday.
She shook her head. Ay-uh, as Barney would say, in a small town, news traveled fast.
ISBN: 978-1-4268-5040-0
SURPRISE DAD
Copyright © 2010 by Barbara Daly / Mary E. Lounsbury.
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, Harlequin Enterprises Limited, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario M3B 3K9, Canada.
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