by Vivian Ward
“The doctor said that he will need to see her. He scheduled her an appointment for December 23rd and 11 AM. I hope that’s okay.”
Crap, that’s right in the middle of my work shift! I have to take her to that appointment. Kevin’s going to see red if I miss more work. Maybe I’ll see if Rachel will trade with me again so I don’t accrue any more points. I’ll have to ask her tomorrow.
On my way home, I called Lorraine to get the scoop on exactly what the doctor said.
“He said that he definitely wants to see her, especially when he learned how severe her pain, swelling, and stiffness was.”
“I figured he would,” I sighed.
“There’s more. He said that he wants to do more testing.”
“What kind of testing?” I interrupted her.
“Another MRI and more X-rays, as well as labs.”
“Good God, I can’t keep affording this. If they want a damn co-pay every time, there’s no way I can swing that.”
“Well, how are you on her other bills? It might not be so bad if you budget it in.” Lorraine suggested.
“Right. Let’s see. How am I on her other bills? Um, well, I owe the hospital around nineteen hundred dollars for her last MRI and set of X-rays and I still owe the lab for her original set of blood tests from when her pediatrician saw her. There’s also the two specialist visits that I owe for. That was only four hundred and fifty bucks, but thanks to my nifty insurance, I only have to pay three hundred.”
Lorraine could hear the frustration in Kimberly’s voice. She wished her and her husband could help her financially, but they couldn’t since Lorraine had bills of her own.
“I’m sorry Kimberly,” I wish there was more that I could do.
Tears began welling up in my eyes, “You already do so much for me! You babysit for free, you come to my house at the drop of a dime anytime I ask you to and you help me out in so many ways. Don’t ever think that you should or could do more. I don’t know where we’d be without you.”
“I know, but I love you guys so much. We’ve been like sisters since the day we became friends. Do you remember that? Back in middle school when I was the new kid and you saved me from that fat pimply dork on the bus who always tried to hit on me?” Lorraine said.
We both had a good laugh. “I remember. You told me to sit with you,” I said.
“Yeah, I told you that you could come sit with me. I’ll never forget. Every day after school, he’d pat his seat and say that you could come sit with him. You rolled your eyes every time,” Lorraine laughed.
“Yep, I sure did. You saved me big time,” I agreed.
“You came and sat with me that day when I asked you to,” Lorraine said.
“I know! I remembered that you were the cool kid, and you were asking me to come sit with you. I was so shocked.” I said.
“But he tried to hit on all the girls. He was such a dork. Nobody ever wanted to sit with him. And ever since that day, we’d go riding bikes together or walk to 7-11 for a snack or go roller skating,” she said, reminiscing down memory lane. “What happened to those days? What happened to us being young and carefree? When did life get so complicated?”
“I don’t know. Somewhere along the lines of when I had a kid.” I said.
“Yeah, I’d say that’s about right.”
“No shit. I’m almost home so I’ll be there in a few minutes,” I told her.
After Nevaeh was neatly tucked into bed and fast asleep, I called Dale to fill him in on what was going on. During our conversation, he—once again—offered to help pay for Nevaeh’s medical bills.
“Dale, I can’t take your money. You understand that right?” I said, too proud to take his money.
“I know, I know. You’ve given me the speech before. Let me see, how does it go? Something like you’ve always worked for everything you’ve ever had and you’re not about to take handouts? Is that how it goes?” he half-heartedly teased me.
“Right, that’s exactly how it goes. Dale, you’ve got to realize something. I’m very proud of everything I’ve accomplished. I’m a hard-working mom who does things on her own. I’ve never relied on someone before so I don’t want to do it now. My mom always taught me that if you want things in life, you’ll work for them.”
After hanging up with him, I began to think that maybe I should take him up on his offer. I really could use the help, and it’s not like he couldn’t afford it. He’s a billionaire! But still, it wouldn’t be right to take his money. I’d hate to feel indebted to him. What if we didn’t work out? Would he expect me to pay him back? With my credit card maxed and single digits in my bank account, I counted the meager amount of cash from today’s shift, knowing it wasn’t nearly enough to cover the large stack of bills on my kitchen table. Geez, when will things get better?
Chapter Ten
“Rachel, I was wondering if you could trade shifts with me next week. Nevaeh’s symptoms have flared up again and I have to take her to see the specialist two days before Christmas, but I can’t miss any more work.”
“I’ll have to check, but if I can, I will.”
This is going to drive me crazy. I can’t keep asking everyone to trade with me, come to my house and bend over backward. Things have to get better, right? Oh, please, Nevaeh get better.
The next morning when I returned to work, Rachel agreed to switch shifts with me on the twenty-third. Nevaeh’s condition hadn’t improved a bit, despite the NSAIDS and methotrexate. I hopelessly scanned information on the internet to see what the next steps were. Dr. Herber said that these medications were only the beginning and had hoped to keep her symptoms at bay for quite a while. Overwhelmed by the wealth of information provided by my searches, I developed a pounding headache.
On the eve of the appointment, Dale offered to go with us.
“No, you have to work,” I reasoned with him.
“I own my company, I can take off whenever I want,” he explained.
“It’s just that I don’t want our problem to become your problem. Know what I’m saying?”
“Kimberly, don’t ever think like that. You and Nevaeh are my world. I want to be there for you guys. I’m coming whether you like it or not, and that’s final.”
I sighed. “Okay, if you want to. Do you want to come pick us up or meet us there?”
“I’ll come pick you up. If she missed most of school last week, I think it would be hard trying to lift her into and out of your car. I’ll bring my SUV and carry her myself.”
“Thanks,” I said relieved that he was going to do that for us.
The next morning, Dale showed up right on time and helped get Nevaeh ready before carrying her to the vehicle. Along the way to the doctor appointment, he tried to make small talk to ease my mind.
“It's a shame Nevaeh doesn’t feel well. I would’ve suggested we hit the mall and do a little Christmas shopping,” he smiled in the rear view mirror at the small girl before glancing over to her mom.
“Yeah, that would’ve been nice,” I agreed. All I could think of was how few gifts Nevaeh would get this year due to my financial situation. And Dale, I hadn’t even bought him a gift. What do you buy a billionaire who already has everything? A tree for the island he owns off the Florida coast?
This was the first year in a long time that I was dreading the holiday. Normally, Christmas was my favorite holiday. I’d deck the house out in tiny snowmen with a nativity scene planted on top of the table near the front door and colored lights inside and out. This year, I barely managed to get a plainly decorated tree up in the living room and wrapped a few strands of garland along the door frame going into the kitchen. The tree had hardly any presents under it, but that was okay. That was normal, especially since Santa brought most of everything anyway. Boy, Santa sure is going to look pathetic this year.
Pulling up at the doctor’s office, Dale parked at the front door and turned on his hazard lights as he climbed out of the SUV to carry Nevaeh inside for me. Once we were inside the w
arm building, he headed back out in the cold and parked the car. Dusting the cold winter chill off of himself as he re-entered the building, the medical assistant was calling Nevaeh back for her appointment. He headed back to the private room with us. Surprisingly, Dr. Newton didn’t keep us waiting this time.
“So I hear Nevaeh’s symptoms have gotten much worse than they initially were. What has changed?”
“She’s still experiencing the severe pain and stiffening even with the medications she’s on. It’s almost as if her body does not recognize the medicine.”
“Mmhmm, I see,” he mumbled, glancing through her chart at the last set of tests. “I think we’ll need to do another MRI and maybe a few more X-rays before we decide on the next step.”
“More testing?” I could feel my heart drop. This wasn’t something I was going to be able to afford.
“Yes, I can get them scheduled right after Christmas and I’ll have you come back in right after the first of the year. With the holidays, I can only work so much magic in rushing the tests.”
“Dale, can you go ahead and start taking Nevaeh back out to the car for me?” I wanted to speak to the doctor alone.
After he and Nevaeh had left, I turned my attention to the doctor. “Look, Dr. Newton, I really like you. You’re a great physician, but I can’t afford to keep doing all of this testing. I’m a single mom who lives on an extremely meager income.”
“Miss Harris, I do understand your concern. These tests are necessary. I would never order additional testing if it weren’t required to determine exactly what we’re dealing with.”
“So you’re saying that these tests are absolutely necessary? You can’t just look at the ones she did a few months ago?”
“I’m afraid not. As the condition progresses, it takes its toll on the body. We need to see how much it has affected her bones and joints. If we don’t do that and don’t treat her condition correctly, it could leave her crippled in a wheelchair with severe pain—more pain that she’s in right now.”
Frustrated, I agreed, “I’ll make sure we have it done.”
Out in the warm car, Dale and Nevaeh waited for me. When he saw me walking out of the building, he circled around to pick me up at the front door. The car ride home was silent as I thought about how much everything was really adding up. It also didn’t help the fact that I barely had Nevaeh’s presents bought for Christmas. When we arrived at my house, he carried Nevaeh inside and sat her on the couch.
“Nevaeh, would you like some hot chocolate?”
“Yes, momma, I would! Can I have marshmallows in it?”
I nodded my head indicating that she could as I made my way into the kitchen. As I filled the cup with water, tears began to blur my vision. Dale walked in and noticed my shoulders heaving as I cried silently by the sink.
He walked behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, “Hey, it’s going to be okay. We won’t let anything happen.”
At my melting point, I broke down. “Let’s go into my bedroom for a minute,” I sat the cup of water on the counter.
Once we were inside the bedroom, I shut the door to prevent Nevaeh from overhearing what I was about to say. Dale looked at me with concern in his eyes; this was going to be bad.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“I don’t know how to say this to you. I—I’m almost ashamed to admit this to you,” I paused, looking away. The tears began to flow. “I’m just so stressed out. I know that she’s sick and needs medical help, but I can’t afford it. I’ve maxed out my credit card, I have almost no cash, business has picked up some, but it’s not been great and I hardly have any of Nevaeh’s presents bought. She was actually hoping for a tablet this year. Before she came out of remission with her symptoms, I told her to pray to God and ask Santa to bring it and maybe she’d get it. I don’t even have fifty bucks to go buy one of those small, cheap tablets! And the doctor keeps ordering all this testing….” My voice broke as sobs washed over me.
“Kimberly, it’s not the end of the world. She needs this medical testing and she needs you. She needs you to be strong for her and show her that everything’s going to be all right. I know that I offered to pay for everything before, and you shot me down, but would you consider it now? Please?”
“I’m sure you mean well, but I can’t just let you pay for everything,” I said, wiping my nose with the sleeve of my sweatshirt.
“Listen, Kimberly, you’re my girlfriend, not some charity case. You and that little girl on the couch out there mean the world to me. I had an idea; don’t interrupt, just hear me out,” he asserted.
I nodded my head, still sniffling with my tears as I wiped my cheeks dry.
“I’ve actually put quite a bit of thought into this; it’s something that’s been on my mind for a while now. I realize that you won’t take my money, you’re not that type of person, but what if I was able to get the money to you in a different way?”
Now he had my attention; I was listening.
“What if I didn’t give you the money?” he asked, putting the word give into air quotes as he said it. “I’d like to hold a fundraiser, and call it the “Nevaeh Fund.” I will personally finance all of her medical bills and procedures. All money raised from the fund will directly go to help benefit other children with her condition.”
He looked into my eyes, trying to gauge my reaction, but my face was blank as I tried to process his words.
“Can I be honest with you?” I asked. “No man has ever been this good or kind to us, why are you? Why do you care so much? I mean, I appreciate what you’re proposing, but what’s your motivation to do it?” I asked out of curiosity.
“I’ve never seen someone as pure as you, so genuine. Kimberly, you may not realize this, but you’ve shown me that people with good hearts really do exist. Your love for Nevaeh is something that I wish I would’ve had with my own mother; I want you to have the best in life. Please, let me help you.”
“Let me think about it. I need time.”
Dale’s words replayed through my mind. How can I not take his help? This could make a huge difference in my baby’s life; how can I deny her of that? I knew there was no way that I could pay for all of this, it would take years based on my salary. The jig was up. I struggled with the fact that I might have to swallow my pride and accept his help. Does that make me a bad mother for taking his money? And how dare he publicize my need? On the same token, I was so touched that he would go through all of the trouble to organize an event on our behalf. It could also help other families that are in the same financial struggle that I am. I had no choice but to resign myself to the fact that I had no choice but to agree to the fundraiser and accept Dale’s help.
I hated the fact that I needed to accept his offer and how ashamed it made me feel. With all of these emotions coursing through me, I wore myself down as I pondered how accepting his generous offer may affect our relationship as I drifted off to sleep that night. I knew it would make a difference in Nevaeh’s life, and it could make a difference in the lives of other children. But would he still love me, or would I now become a mission to him—someone to fix instead of someone to love? I wanted more than ever to believe nothing would change, or more truthfully that money wouldn’t change our relationship. My heart wants to believe it; now if I can just get my head on board. I held onto that as I finally fell asleep.
After a good night’s rest, I mulled it over some more in the morning; it was Christmas Eve. Staring at the bare tree made me feel even worse, but at least Santa would be coming that night. He would deliver several more presents for my baby girl, though, none of them would contain the tablet that she so desperately wanted. The one she’d been hoping and praying for.
“Dale,” I said when he answered the phone, “I was wondering if you were coming over tonight for dinner?”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Is there any particular time I should be there?”
“Oh, I thought maybe we’d eat around six o’clock, and
maybe we could have some eggnog after dinner.”
“Sounds good to me. Do you need me to bring a dish or pick anything up on my way over?” He knew that I couldn’t leave my little girl to run to the store.
“Actually, yes, if you could pick up an apple pie and some whipped cream, that would be great. I forgot to get dessert when I went shopping for dinner.”
“I’ll be there in just a bit; I’m wrapping some presents right now and then I’ll head over.”
“You didn’t have to get us anything for Christmas,” I said, feeling guilty for not having a present for him to open.
“I know I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. It’s nothing significant.”
Honesty got the best of me. “Dale, I have to admit something to you. I didn’t have money to get you anything,” I explained as shame swept over me.