Conklin's Corruption
Page 19
She hovered over me, and I grabbed her hips, wanting to completely fill her, drown in her until my heart felt normal again. When she finally did, it was frantic and frenzied. She moved too fast, pulling to a sitting position while resting her hands on my chest. The speed was overwhelming, fast like my racing mind. I moved my hands from her hips to grasp the sheets, my nails biting into my palms through the sheets instead of her precious skin.
Her eyes were screwed shut as she bit her bottom lip, her hips grinding up and down. My eyes were transfixed on her features, her breasts bouncing as she moved. The sight of her beautiful body moving against me helped me to focus on the now. I licked my lips, feeling the urge to taste her everywhere.
I leaned up on my elbows, my mouth finding her skin. She let out a loud moan, leaning forward more so I could fit more of her in my mouth. She was unraveling fast, and I was more than able to keep up with her speed. One hand cautiously found the curve of her spine, holding her down as she ground her hips into me, keeping the depth deep inside of her.
“Becca, when you move your hips like that,” I groaned. She did it faster, her breath hitching along with mine. I was about to explode, secretly begging her to come so I could give in to the temporary pleasure of losing myself.
I could tell she was close by her movements finding a more steady rhythm. I moved my hands back to the sheets, knowing once we both let go my fists would ball into vices.
I pushed my hips along with her. She rammed her hips down hard, clenching her insides as whimpers left her lips.
“Yes…,” I hissed, finally giving in and letting go, all tension leaving every strained muscle in my body. My elbows gave way and my back slammed against the mattress. Becca quickly followed but with her head on my chest, her breath slowing.
My hands were still at my sides, still gripping the sheet as I took deep, calming breaths.
Becca’s hand found my chest, her fingers flexing gently as she spoke. “Ty, please, put your arms around me.”
I tentatively smiled with my eyes closed. “Okay.”
***
I wish I could say I slept peacefully all night, but that would be a complete lie. I jolted whenever I heard a sound. The air conditioner, leaves of the trees swaying in the breeze, the waves crashing against the beach. All sounds that used to calm me now made me paranoid that a drug addict my brother sold to was going to finagle his way into my home and try to hurt the woman I loved.
I wrapped my arms around her, holding on to her as my mind consumed any rationality I had. For whatever reason, I knew Chino wasn’t lying when he said he had people on the inside of our company, my idiot brother being one of them. How could he betray us like that? Unless he was on RJ’s side… but RJ wasn’t on Chino’s side, was he? I still didn’t know what or who to believe.
Thinking about the mess of not knowing who my father and grandfather actually were was an anxiety attack creeping into my lungs, feathering throughout my body. Tingles of fear and uncertainty spread like wildfire, and I didn’t know how to stop them. So I lay staring at the ceiling, my arms clinging to the only person who offered me any solace.
My eyes were heavy when Becca stirred awake. It was nearly 7:00 a.m., and she stretched on top of my body, wiggling her hips against my groin as she gave my chest butterfly kisses.
“Did you sleep okay?” she asked, nuzzling her cheek into my chest.
“Yeah,” I said more gruffly than I meant to. She slowly lifted her head to meet my eyes, and worry spread over her face.
“Are you okay?” she asked with concern. “Your eyes are red and kind of puffy. Did you sleep at all last night?”
I blinked my eyes for a long second then looked out towards the porch. “Yeah, I slept fine. Well, except for your snoring,” I teased.
She frowned, ignoring my sarcasm. “Why don’t you go back to sleep while I make us breakfast,” she said lovingly as she stroked my unshaven face. “This is so hot,” she whispered, biting her lip in that seductive way.
My lip quirked. “Okay, I won’t shave it off. Go ahead and make breakfast while I shower.”
She frowned at me again. “Don’t you want to shower together?”
I blinked. Of course I wanted to shower with her, that body wet and stretched for my eyes to watch. My dick twitched underneath her, causing a devious grin to spread across her face.
“That’s what I thought,” she flirted.
I shook my head. “No time, baby. I have to make it to a meeting by 9:00 a.m. for Nathan in Grand Rapids. I messaged him last night about needing to switch places for today.”
Her face fell. “Oh. I have to go give another statement today at the police station. I wasn’t planning on either of us working. I was hoping you could come with me after last night… Wait… did you say for today? As though you are going to leave for Chicago later in the week?”
My eyes darted away from hers. “I have meetings I can’t miss.”
I could feel her eyes on me, and I didn’t want to look at her. I knew what they held— disappointment and fear. “Tyler, can’t Nathan work in Chicago while you stay here? I think we need to spend some time together after everything that’s happened,” she said quietly.
Gently pulling her off of me so I could stand from the bed, I said, “Becca, I’ve told you over and over again. We have a lot to figure out with RJ being gone. I can’t just fall off the grid with you right now, and neither can you. I know you care about your work.”
Becca sat up, holding a pillow to her chest. “I know, but we can work anywhere. I just thought…” She swallowed hard as she looked to the ground. “With last night, I thought…” She stopped mid sentence.
Finally, I turned to look at her. “You thought what?”
Her voice was stronger when she looked up to me. “I thought last night was a turnaround. I thought maybe you could start healing.”
I threw my hand towards her as I walked to the bathroom. “I don’t need to heal. All last night proved was I need to spend more time at work to take care of the damage my father… or grandfather… put this company in. I won’t have drug addicts breaking into my house, let alone our unpurchased/empty/vacant properties.”
Becca rolled her eyes. “It’s more than just work. You’re different Tyler. You need to talk to someone,” she pleaded while following me into the bathroom.
“Forgive me for being edgy after some creep broke into my house and tried to come onto my fiancé!”
I turned on the shower then walked to the sink to let the water warm while I brushed my teeth. I was furious and testy now, annoyed that Becca was trying to penetrate my unnecessary emotions.
Still holding the pillow to her chest, Becca nudged her way between the counter and myself. “Isn’t that more reason for us to not be apart?”
“Whenever I’m in Chicago or Cleveland, you need to stay with your parents or sister. We should put this house on the market,” I grumbled, pushing her to the side and wetting my toothbrush.
“No!” she whined. “I don’t want to sell the house. Why don’t you talk to Mitch about it?”
“We can build another one. One that doesn’t attract junkies! Mitch is lucky I haven’t killed him yet.”
“I doubt we’ll have any more trouble,” she whispered.
I turned to her. “Yes, because YOU will remember to turn on the God damn alarm!” I scolded while pointing my toothbrush at her.
She flinched at my outburst. I was a bit harsh, but it was true. If she would have turned the alarm on, the guy would have been scared off or caught. He never would have laid a greasy finger on my Becs. I shoved the toothbrush in my mouth before I could say anything more, becoming angrier thinking about the previous night.
Just as I was about to spit toothpaste, Becca dropped her pillow and stared at me through the mirror her head cocked to the side.
My eyes traveled from her seductive stare down to her beautiful breasts, perfect stomach, gently curved hips, and well toned legs. Jesus, even her feet were sexy
with bright pink nail polish. As my eyes traveled back up her body, they fixated on the bite mark on her shoulder. I closed my eyes. I was too upset for her to come on to me right now. Who knows what else I would be capable of, and we were lucky I didn’t hurt her last night. It took all of my control to grasp the sheets and not bruise her body.
When I went back to brushing my teeth and looking down towards the sink, I heard her sigh then grab her robe and leave the bathroom.
I could feel the disappointment and rejection in the air. The awful feeling in my gut sat there throughout my shower, and I’m sure it would until I could see her smile again.
Chapter 15
Becca
Last night my emotions were like whiplash. I was scared out of my mind from the crack head intruder, but Tyler’s sporadic mood has been just as chilling. Last night he wouldn’t let go of me, his arms were delicate and loving, yet strong and comforting at the same time. His voice was soothing, and he actually opened up to me.
We had made love for the first time in a few weeks, and even though I could tell he wasn’t as connected and his mind was still in other places, he was trying to comfort me. I really thought we were turning around. Until he woke up and said he was leaving again, being agitated and cranky when I tried to get him to talk.
I pulled my robe tighter, fighting off the feeling of the rejected look from Tyler’s eyes as I dropped my pillow this morning, baring myself to him, saying, please, open up to me, touch me again, take me, I need you. But his eyes only perused my body then continued to look at the faucet. My annoying insecurities popped up, saying he didn’t like how I looked, but I knew it was more. After all he confessed last night, I knew he was carrying more than just guilt of RJ’s passing.
Tears stung my eyes. One step forward and two steps back seemed to be our relationship lately. How many more times until we hit a wall?
I methodically moved around the kitchen, pushing back all of my self doubt and insecurities while making breakfast. I put together an omelet for myself then one for Tyler, praying he would eat it. I never knew what it was like to worry about someone who didn’t eat. I understood now why he always kept a close eye on me. I always ate though. He was skipping meals and snacks all together because his mind was completely out of it.
I was gazing out the window at the lake when Tyler came into the kitchen, dressed handsome as always in his charcoal suit and matching tie. It hurt to see him purposely avoid looking at me.
“I made you an omelet,” I murmured, continuing to look out the window.
“Thanks,” he said in a low tone, standing in front of the coffee maker we rarely used. That was a sure tell he really didn’t sleep last night. After he fussed with it for a few minutes, he leaned against the fridge with his eyes closed. I wanted to hug him. I needed to hug him, but I was so terrified of his rejection.
“What time are you meeting with the detective?” Tyler asked while keeping his eyes closed.
Startled he spoke to me, I replied, “I’m not sure. He said to stop in after 10:00 a.m. I’ll probably go to the store when you leave then head over there.”
He opened one eye then looked down at his watch, chewing on his lip as though he were thinking.
More silence passed between us.
Finally, I stood from the breakfast table and walked to the sink, disposing of my dish. “Don’t let your omelet get cold,” I said quietly.
I felt his gaze on my profile as I fiddled with the dishwasher then felt his hand finally touch my back. “Becca, I meant what I said about staying with your parents or sister.”
I closed the dishwasher, leaning into his touch that I longed for. “Okay,” I whispered, then reached for the lapels of his jacket, curling myself into his chest. “Please figure out your business soon.”
***
Six weeks of bouncing from house to house and I was exhausted. I was ready to be back in my own home. I wasn’t scared anymore, but Tyler wouldn’t have it. He said if he weren’t there, I wasn’t allowed to stay.
My emotions were high, and I was losing faith in our relationship. We had only spent a handful of nights together, each of them brisk and painfully quiet. Every time my mother pulled out the wedding book I had to put on a face, trying to look excited when really I was a complete wreck.
Heather knew something was wrong, but I wouldn’t talk to her. Same with Jamie. Even with Jamie being so far away in Florida she could tell I was upset over the phone and continued to tell me to give Tyler the ultimatum.
“Becca, you don’t have to marry him yet. Just because you’ve said yes and have been making plans doesn’t mean you have to go through with it.” Jamie had said this numerous times. I knew I had this option, but I loved him so much, all I wanted was to help him through his storm. I wasn’t about to give up on him. I knew in my heart he would feel the same way if the roles were reversed.
“Chicago’s traffic is worse than Miami’s!” Jamie grumbled as she weaved her way through the cars. Heather laughed in the backseat along with Josie.
“I know, right? Becca, hopefully Tyler won’t want to move here permanently,” Heather said.
“He practically does live here already,” I whispered.
Jamie’s eyes darted to mine, and I quickly changed the subject. “Mom and Mary are meeting us at Bella Vie. Then we’ll get dinner. Tyler and the men are getting their tuxes fitted today too.”
“I didn’t know Tyler and the guys were coming! Maybe we could all go out tonight?” Jamie said excitedly.
“That would be so much fun!” Heather squealed. “And you could stay with Grandma, little missy!” Josie giggled in her car seat and threw her hands in the air with excitement.
I sat quietly in the front seat, biting my nail. With how Tyler had been acting, I doubted he would want to go out in the Chicago nightlife.
Jamie sensed my apprehension. “Maybe it will help them unwind with everything that’s been going on at work.”
I gave her a soft smile. I confessed to Jamie everything that Tyler had told me, but only because she already knew. Nathan had filled her in, wanting her to keep an eye on Mitch since he had been traveling to Miami more frequently.
“I’m still amazed they all took a Friday off. You know how those men work!” Heather huffed.
It was shocking that Tyler, Nathan, Mitch, Ray, my brother Michael, and my father all weren’t working. I felt like the world might stop. Guilt spread through me for having doubt that Tyler might not want this. Our entire families were putting their lives on hold for this shower and fittings, and our families never took time outs for anything.
Mary had been hanging onto this wedding tightly ever since RJ’s death. It was the only thing that seemed to keep her together. She had called me every other day, asking what she could do and what my thoughts were on all the details, flowers, cake, centerpieces, favors, any small detail that involved a wedding.
Everyone seemed to take this wedding seriously, except for Tyler. Whenever I’d bring up the wedding, Tyler would just say, “Okay,” or, “Whatever you want.” He didn’t care at all.
Jamie pulled into the parking ramp for Belle Vie, and we were greeted with warm smiles from the receptionist. Both my mother and Mary were already there. Mary was practically jumping with excitement, hugging me tightly.
“Becca, I’ve been looking forward to today!” She let go of me then turned me in the direction of who I assumed was the designer.
She had a big smile, but her eyes wandered over my body, making me shrivel as I shook her hand. My self image was better than it used to be but would always be damaged. Tyler being so distant didn’t help either.
“Hi Becca, I’m Acra. It’s so nice to finally meet you. Mary has been talking up how you are going to make a beautiful bride. Now that we’ve met, I completely agree!” She smiled while shaking my hand.
I smiled back, wondering if that was her traditional line for a new client.
“Well, let’s get started! I pulled some dresses from wh
at Mary said the two of you talked about, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to pull some more once I get a full look at your figure.” I nodded then put my head to the ground. Worry struck my nerves believing this might be more challenging than I pictured in my head.
Heather and Jamie both looped an arm through each of mine and gave me encouraging smiles as we followed Mary, my mother, and Acra to the fitting rooms.
The surroundings were so white and pure. Large mirrors and chaise loungers were placed throughout the space while soft music played in the background.
“Becca, stand on this pedestal. This is your day after all,” Acra said kindly.
I slowly stepped on the pedestal, feeling awkward as I looked down at my family and future mother-in-law staring at me with doting smiles.
I tried not to fidget as Acra circled me, her mouth pierced and her expression of deep thought as she studied me. “Hmm… I think I have a few that will be perfect,” she said then took off on a mission.
“Do you girls have your dresses yet?” Mary asked both Heather and Jamie.
“Yes, they came in a few weeks ago. I love the plum. It looks really good on Jamie,” Heather said.
“Oh, please! You only saw a picture from your camera!” Jamie said.
Heather laughed. “At least it matches your complexion!” Heather whined. “But I’m not going to complain because I made Becca wear yellow.”
My mother laughed. “Yes, that wasn’t the best color for Becca at the time.”
I shriveled on the pedestal. Tyler loved me in yellow. Maybe it was because I was pale and overweight for Heather’s wedding and that was why I didn’t look good.
“Becca,” Jamie said sternly, causing me to lift my head in her direction. Her smile was strong, telling me to stop listening to my head. I gave her a gracious look. It’s amazing how a best friend can read your mind and with one look tell you they understand and to stop listening to the monster inside your head.