Biologically and spiritually, she was his. She’d never be able to form a mate bond with another shifter. Nor did she want to. Part of her wanted to turn around and run back into his arms, begging him to lick the wound, even if it meant facing humiliation again.
I’m the biggest damn fool alive.
The safety of her home came into view, thankfully pulling her out of her thoughts. She couldn’t make sense of them. Or what Ethan had done to her. His emotions flowed through her, a rush of contradicting feelings she couldn’t separate. Added to hers, she was doubly confused.
A glance at her familial home showed it empty, no lights on or cars parked in the driveway. She breathed a sigh of relief. She’d taken the long way back to her property, slinking along the main highway cutting through their territory to avoid her pack mates, but she hadn’t escaped their protectors’ notice.
Chris had made his presence known. A growl from her had stopped him from coming near her. She didn’t want anyone to see the bloody wound on her shoulder or know the shame she’d experienced at the hands of her true mate—the male who claimed to love her.
No. He loves me. I saw the truth in his eyes. I feel it in my soul.
Of course, she also felt his regret. The guilt countered the devotion and left her teetering on the edge of a mental breakdown.
She slowed her steps and finally came to a stop in the backyard, feet away from her back door. His words and actions had hurt. There was no denying it. Had he meant them to? Or was there another explanation, one she couldn’t see from behind the veil of despair that gripped her?
“I’m going to catch you near the border and make sure you’re safe from Michael until I can kill him.” Ethan’s words skipped through her mind. Realization struck. He had made sure she was safe. He’d kept Greg away from her and turned Michael’s game against him. Michael would’ve used her bond to Ethan as a means to keep him in line, much as Michael did to many of his pack mates. And now Michael thinks I’m nothing to Ethan when in fact, I’m his life.
Ethan had made good on his promise. He’d said he never wanted to face another day without her. With the piece of her soul he’d claimed, he wouldn’t.
“Shift for me, Hannah. I need to hold you in my arms.”
She glanced in the direction of Noah’s voice. He stood near the tree line. Every fiber of her being reached out to him. He was ruggedly beautiful, strong, and confident, and he drew her as completely as Ethan did.
A single thought brought about her shift. She turned to face Noah but didn’t go to him. She pressed her hand over her shoulder. A thump had developed where Ethan had bitten her. She knew what it was—the physical response mated females felt in the presence of their mates. Hers was nowhere close, though.
“He mated me. Soul-bonded to me.”
“I told him to.”
“Why? He could’ve waited until next month.”
Noah closed the distance between them but didn’t pull her into his arms, even though he’d said he wanted to hold her.
“He could’ve, but”—he tipped up her chin with a single finger and stared deeply into her eyes—“only a fool would let the woman he loves walk away without her understanding she’s the reason he breathes.”
His face blurred. She blinked her tears away. “I love him.”
“So do I.”
She lifted her hand and stared at the blood on her palm. “Will he come back to us tonight? Finish it, so everyone knows I’m his mate?”
He cradled her hand and brought it to his lips. He licked away her blood. Each swipe of his tongue over her flesh intensified the thudding in the wound Ethan had left on her. “No. He can’t. You know that. It’s too dangerous.”
She did, but the idea of his mark healing felt wrong. She’d lose everything if it did.
“I need him.” She voiced the conviction that had settled in her heart. “And you. I need to belong to both of you, not just symbolically or through marriage. Do you understand?”
Because she wasn’t sure she did. She only knew she couldn’t let the night pass without tying Noah to her as irrevocably as Ethan had joined her to him. She just didn’t know how.
The corner of his mouth lifted on a half smile, but he didn’t speak. He held his hand out to her. She slid her palm against his. He curled his fingers around hers and drew her into his embrace. His warmth beckoned her closer. She didn’t fight the urge. She locked her arms around his chest and squeezed him tight.
Peace settled over, despite the emptiness Ethan’s absence brought. Eyes closed, she let the comfort Noah offered soothe her. Tension drained from her muscles, but the sense of calm didn’t last. The first stirrings of desire snaked through her. Her breathing deepened, and the thud in her shoulder reverberated in her veins.
She squirmed in his hold, and he groaned as her restless movements stimulated him as much as her. His penis thickened and lengthened. The sensation of his hard cock poking at her flipped a switch inside her. Her core quivered, and lust seized her. The quick change in her mood left her unsteady. She clutched at him, pulling him impossibly closer.
“Noah, I love you too. I don’t want you to walk away without knowing how much.”
He swept her into his arms. His beautiful green eyes filled her vision. Love showed in them. “I don’t plan on it. Not tonight, tomorrow, or the next day.”
He didn’t give her the chance to respond. He skimmed his hand over her hip and thigh as he kissed her, exploring her mouth as if what they shared was their very first kiss. She gloried in his attention, and the burn in her body intensified with each slow, controlled stroke of his tongue against her. On and on, he made love to her mouth. It was wonderful. She could’ve spent all night exactly as they were, but the lusts he’d stirred with his presence grew stronger the longer he kissed her.
She writhed in his arms, needing more than the reverence he offered, then linked her legs around his waist and her hands behind his neck. On a groan, she tightened her hold on him and thrust her tongue into his mouth, demanding he meet her needs.
He growled against her lips. The sound sent a shiver down her spine. She tore her mouth from his. “Noah, make love to me. Please.”
He mapped her face with his gaze. A sharp nod answered her, but he didn’t lower her to the ground. He carried her inside her house and took her to her bedroom. The moment he kicked the door shut, his mouth found hers. He walked forward, kissing her madly the whole time.
Soft sheets met her back as he laid her down. He settled between her legs, and his hard length slipped through her wetness. On a single thrust, he filled her. She shuddered with the sensation of his body joined with hers. Every inch of his cock teased her, stimulating her in ways no other lover had. Except for Ethan, that was. Both of her lovers fit her as if made for her. And they were. They were her gifts, and she’d treasure them for every day they had together.
Noah rocked into her, loving her from the inside out. Their passion built and the sweet loving turned into a race to reach ecstasy. He slipped a hand under her body, locking her to him, and fucked her. Each stroke came quicker than the last, and her inner muscles tightened over his driving cock, trying to hold him deep. They fell into the age-old dance of lovers, moving in sync and fulfilling each other’s wants.
Except for one.
He had to claim her as his mate too.
As if he sensed her frustration, he broke their kiss and flipped her to her stomach. She scrambled to her hands and knees, exactly the position Noah needed her.
“Bite me, Noah. I want your fangs buried in my shoulder, your cock inside me, and your…” The answer to their unusual bond became clear, and the shame Ethan had caused her by not sealing the wound he’d left on her was the way she’d join Noah to them. “Your soul embracing mine.”
She looked over her shoulder. “Do you understand? Ethan left the pathway to my soul open. You can touch
it. Take a piece of my soul to fill the hole in yours. I have enough love for both of you. I can be the center of us.”
He grinned and settled behind her, positioning his erection at her opening. “You already are.”
“Then make it official, my mate.” She wiggled her bottom, enticing him to fill her. “Finish this.”
“With pleasure.”
He drove his cock deep, pushing her body forward. She grabbed the sheets and braced herself for his pounding strokes. Already highly aroused, she was ready to combust. Her core tingled. Every nerve came alive. She wanted to savor the moment. Noah’s focused loving didn’t allow for it. He built her pleasure, bringing heaven down to her a second time tonight.
She pushed up on her elbows, changing the depth of Noah’s thrusts, and countered him. They moved as one, anticipating and meeting each other’s needs, exactly as Ethan had not long ago. Both of her mates complemented her, giving her what she desired to reach the highest peak.
Noah’s breathing grew shallower, and the cock lodged deep within her thickened. He banded his arm around her stomach and yanked her against him.
He buried his face against her shoulder. “Going to make you mine.”
“Yes, do—”
He bit before she could get the words out. A sharp pain whipped through her, and the grinding of his teeth in her shoulder tore a groan from her. The pain faded with the light shining down upon her. It was Noah’s soul brightening hers, exactly as Ethan’s had, but a shadow dimmed part of it. The hole in his soul from when he’d mated Mindy and given her a piece of it cast a dark spotlight on her.
She wanted to fill it. Complete him. Complete them.
His love wrapped around her, along with his mental caress, and he eased back with a piece of her soul. For a brief moment, she could’ve sworn she felt Ethan with them, sharing in their passion. She didn’t know if it was real or not, but she opened herself to both males, exactly as she had when Ethan had walked through her soul, hoping that somehow he’d experience what Noah was doing to her.
Warmth spread through her limbs. Their love surrounded her, seeped into her and became the glue that would link them always.
Noah released her shoulder, and the first lick of his tongue to the wound sent energy zinging through her body.
“Yes, Noah. More.” She clutched his head and held him in place while he healed the wound and completed their mating. Not just hers and Ethan’s, but the three of them.
“My mate. My Hannah. I love you.” Noah groaned the words against her shoulder, then came in short quick jerks that filled her with his seed.
She arched into him on a gasp. Her orgasm rolled over her, one strong wave after another. Finally, their joint release ended, and Ethan’s presence faded. She tried to hold on to him but couldn’t. Within one heartbeat and the next, he was gone.
Noah flopped to the side, panting heavily. She turned toward him. He gathered her close and laid his cheek over the top of her head. “A month, Hannah. That’s all we’ll have to wait. Then we’ll be able to hold our mate in our arms.”
She couldn’t wait. “And once we do, we’re never letting him go.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Ethan greeted the new day alone. Physically, at least. Emotionally and spiritually, he shared a tie to Hannah, and through Hannah, Noah.
Eyes closed and hands fisted around the railing of his deck, he opened his mind. Two thick, luminous tethers extended from his soul, one joining him to his wolf, the other to Hannah. He couldn’t see the bond she shared with Noah, but he felt it. Noah was a shadow in Ethan’s mind, strengthening him.
He used a metaphysical hand to examine the new coiled rope. A single stroke over the shimmering cord, and awareness settled over him, along with need. The yearning to seek Hannah out overwhelmed him. He wanted to feel her skin pressed to his and to hear her cries of completion in his ear as she came apart around his dick.
On top of the physical craving for his mate, possessive and protective instincts consumed him. He couldn’t help but wonder what she was doing or with whom. He knew, of course. She was with Noah and would remain with him until the next full moon. Holding him. Kissing him. Loving him. She’d fall asleep in his arms and wake up with his scent in her lungs. Not Ethan’s.
His growl started as a low rumble in his chest and built into a deep snarl that left him vibrating with anger. Their mating wasn’t supposed to have ended up with them separated or with Hannah crying and seeking comfort from Noah. Yet it had.
It was Michael’s fault too.
Muscles locked, he tightened his grip on the wooden railing. Every fiber of his being reached for her—his mate, his lover, his friend. He wanted to hold her. Soothe her injured pride too.
But I can’t. I have to pretend as if she means nothing to me.
His wolf whined, sharing his pain. The animal’s small whimper was one Ethan had heard many times over the years, and it wasn’t Hannah it had cried for.
Every night Noah had walked away from them, it had been saddened. Ethan had suffered from loneliness and jealousy for years when it came to Noah. The looks of lust on females’ faces for him had infuriated Ethan. Often he’d been tempted to yank Noah behind him and snarl at anyone who’d dare try to take Noah away or sway his devotion. The need for secrecy and the knowledge that Noah loved him had eased Ethan’s intense emotions.
Was the situation he was in with Hannah any different? She loved him. Or she had before he’d humiliated her. I had no choice. Protecting her comes first.
Yes, he knew that. It didn’t make what he’d done okay.
And if Noah hadn’t left her alone, I never would’ve hurt her…
Ethan shut the thought off and curled his hands until his nails dug into his skin. No. He would not go there. Noah had made a choice. There was no going back in time to change it. Hannah had survived. Ethan had made sure she was safe and wouldn’t be alone. Noah was with her, bonded to her in a way even Ethan hadn’t fathomed. Both his lovers were safe, and he’d never be separated from them. That was all that mattered. Together they would heal any wounds caused by the previous night’s events. First, he had to make plans to ensure they had a future.
Ethan dragged in a deep breath, letting the tension drain from his body. He had a decision to make, one that went against nature. The primal side of him balked at the idea. The rest of him understood the necessity of it. As a shifter who would soon be alpha, he had to weigh the choices and pick the best one, not only for him but for his pack and their species as a whole.
His gaze drifted to clearing where he’d met Hannah. Her visit had opened up a world he’d never known possible, but it had also brought to light a fact that shamed him. She hadn’t come to his pack lands looking for a mate. She’d wanted to find out if Tanner males were as depraved as they were perceived. As much as he wished it differently, shifters outside his pack viewed them that way. Years of Michael’s influence had built their reputation.
If members of their own species considered his pack corrupted, what would humans think of them? Or of shifters in general?
He’d worried for years about how his species would be received once the general public learned of them. So had nearly every shifter, no matter the variety. It was why their elders made the historic move and reached out to the humans. The deals and the laws they’d helped establish paved the groundwork for human-shifter relations. But was it the right choice?
Were they really above the law?
That was the point that had left a sick feeling in his gut in the days since he’d wielded those same historic edicts—holding him exempt from human interference. The human government would essentially turn a blind eye to the fact he was going to commit premeditated murder.
Shifter law said it was his right. The strong should survive. If a male could no longer hold on to his position, he didn’t deserve to live. That was what he’d been taugh
t.
And it was that very attitude that would destroy them.
He took a deep breath, letting his choice settle over him, then took out his cell phone and turned it on. A missed call and a text message from Ella showed on the screen.
I have news. Some good. Some bad. Call me.
The time stamped on the text was a little after midnight. Tension radiated through him. He’d missed her call. Anything could’ve happened in the hours since. He selected Ella’s number from his contacts and dialed.
“What happened?” he asked before she could get her greeting out.
“Owen wasn’t one of the shifters being auctioned, but our agent managed to get the contact information of a buyer who might be able to locate him. Or at least wolf shifters who meet the description you gave us.”
He pushed back the frustration. The humans weren’t giving up on Owen. They were fighting for him. Ethan would do the same.
“Thank you, Ella. I appreciate it.”
“Don’t thank me until I bring him home to you. If he’s still alive, I promise I’ll find him.”
He grinned. “I know, and I’ve decided to do my share to help bring him home, along with all the other shifters and humans who’ve been deemed expendable.”
“How so?”
“I’ve changed my mind about Michael. I’m not going to kill him.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Ethan sat in his car and stared in the direction of the Kagan’s pack land. Hannah was there, along with Noah. After nearly four weeks, the pull to them was as strong as it had been after he’d mated Hannah. Ethan wanted to go to them. He couldn’t. Not yet. It wasn’t safe. He understood the necessity of their separation, but the month without them had been hard.
At night, he reached for them, aching for their touch. But cold sheets greeted him. During the day, he stared at his phone, yearning to hear their voices. Instead, silence surrounded him.
Shared for Love: Kagan Wolves, Book 2 Page 26