* * *
Lily slowly rode back to the ranch with Daisy and Blue. Thorpe had shared much more than she’d ever expected. He hadn’t said as much, but it was apparent that he’d been intimate with Evelyn. He had to have been in love with her since he asked her to marry him. It was more than he’d said to her. I want you, was what he told her. No declaration of love or of marriage. He was obviously still in love with Evelyn. Knowing Thorpe’s character, there was no doubt what he would do. He was a man who would always do the right thing.
By the time she rode into the stable she was cried out. She told herself she could handle staying at the ranch until Isabelle had her baby. Isabelle had Stone now, and she had no reason to stay after the baby came. Weather permitting, she could pack her wagon and take off, and that is exactly what she planned to do.
* * *
Thorpe rode into the stable and took the saddle off Smoke and started brushing him. He was right back where he’d started several hours earlier. All afternoon and early evening he’d done nothing but think over the situation he’d found himself in. All that thinking hadn’t solved one problem. He thought he was in love with Lily and he couldn’t deny it any longer. Somewhere in the back of his mind he’d known it all along, or at least about fifteen minutes after he’d met her. He wasn’t a conceited man, but he knew he could have a few women if that was his nature. It wasn’t just a physical attraction with Lily. Well, it was physical, but that wasn’t all of it. He wanted her all right, but he also liked and respected her. He’d told her the truth; he wanted all of her, and that included her heart. He couldn’t handle the thought of her waiting for Captain Anderson to appear. He didn’t doubt her word that she considered Anderson a friend, but he figured Anderson might change her mind quick enough if he came calling.
Thorpe remembered his father had told him one time that the first time he saw his mother, he knew she was the one for him. He wondered if his father admitted it to himself right away, or if he came to the decision kicking and screaming. Frustrated with himself, he exhaled loudly. He had to stop thinking about what he wanted and start thinking about what he had to do. He couldn’t be as foolish as he’d been before. There were consequences if he acted on his desires. His thoughts drifted back to Evelyn. He had to face the fact that what he wanted didn’t enter into the equation. He had to do the right thing.
After he put Smoke in the stall and gave him fresh water, he left the stable. He was late for dinner so he figured he’d be eating alone. When he walked into the house he found everyone in the kitchen around the table. “Hello.”
“Mr. Thorpe, I was just about to go looking for you,” Jed said.
“Time got away from me,” Thorpe said. He took a seat at the table and looked at Lily by the stove with her back to him. “Haven’t you eaten?”
“No, we waited for you,” Isabelle said.
Thorpe glanced at Stone. “Did you get a chance to move your things upstairs?”
“I hadn’t talked to you about that. I wasn’t sure you wanted another person under your roof,” Stone told him.
“Nonsense, unless Isabelle doesn’t want you to share her room, there’s no reason for you to stay in the bunkhouse. When you two are ready after the baby is born, you can move to your home, but there is no need to hurry.”
“Thanks, Thorpe.”
Lily walked to the table and filled their cups. Thorpe took the coffeepot from her hands, saying, “I’ll do that. Thanks for waiting dinner.”
She couldn’t respond for fear of crying again. She’d been emotional since her conversation with Thorpe, and when he didn’t show up at dinnertime, she thought he might be with Evelyn.
Isabelle helped Lily carry the food to the table and after the prayer was said, Thorpe noticed Blue was lying at Lily’s side. “Blue’s been hanging pretty close to you the last several days.”
“Yes, I don’t know what’s wrong,” she said softly.
“But you think something’s wrong?” Knowing how connected the two of them were, that concerned Thorpe. “Do you think he’s sick?”
“No, his eyes look clear and he’s eating well.” Lily wished she could have a conversation like nothing was wrong, but she couldn’t. She was worried about Blue, and she was heartsick thinking Thorpe had been with Evelyn. She avoided looking at Thorpe for fear of crying again.
It was obvious Lily didn’t want to talk, and he didn’t want to create more tension between them. He decided to leave it alone, and he turned his attention on Jed. He wanted to tell him about the plan he’d come up with earlier in the day when he wasn’t thinking about Lily. Why was it he could find a way to help Stone and Jed, but he couldn’t find an answer to his own problem? “Jed, I was thinking if you decide to stay here we might consider setting up a blacksmith shop in the old barn. We can get the equipment in here that you need and I’m sure the ranchers would come here with their business.”
Jed gave him a look of disbelief. “Mr. Thorpe, are you serious?”
When Thorpe assured him he was very serious, he said, “That’s mighty kind of you, and if I stay, you can bet I’d be interested.”
Lily knew Thorpe had come up with that plan after she’d told him about Jed’s situation earlier. Thorpe’s concern for others was one of the many reasons she’d fallen in love with him. His heart matched his bravery and she didn’t think she’d ever meet another man like him. It saddened her to know that there would be no place for her in his life, but she was grateful that he’d helped the others. Evelyn was getting a wonderful man. She took solace in the fact that she would find her grandfather and they’d find a place to start over. She reached down and stroked Blue’s head. She just prayed that Blue stayed with her; she couldn’t bear the thought of losing him.
Everyone finished eating and Isabelle said, “There’s more cake if anyone would like some.”
“I would,” Thorpe responded. He didn’t get to enjoy his piece of cake earlier since Evelyn barged in on their celebration. He couldn’t avoid thinking about her and the situation. He jumped up and walked to the parlor and grabbed the whiskey bottle. When he returned to the table, he held the bottle over Stone’s cup.
Stone nodded and Thorpe poured some in his cup before he filled his own. He held his cup in the air. “Congratulations. I hope you have a long and happy marriage.”
Stone tapped his cup to Thorpe’s and said, “We will.”
* * *
After everyone retired for the night, Thorpe sat at the kitchen table alone and had another cup of whiskey. It reminded him of the years he’d spent alone on the ranch and he had the whole house to himself. He’d always enjoyed his quiet time at night, but now that he’d had shared his evenings with friends, his solitude was dismal. He wanted to stop thinking tonight, particularly about Evelyn. He thought he was finished with her. He’d moved on. And then there was Lily. Why couldn’t he get her out of his mind? He finished his drink and grabbed the whiskey bottle to take upstairs to his room. He planned to get a fire going and have one more drink before he turned in. When he passed Lily’s door, he hesitated. Keep walking, he told himself. He couldn’t. He tapped on the door with the bottle.
Lily opened the door thinking it must be Isabelle. When she saw Thorpe standing there leaning against the frame, she was so surprised, she forgot she was only wearing her nightgown. “What? Is something wrong?”
Thorpe stared at her, his eyes taking in every inch of her. Her hair was hanging over one shoulder and her hairbrush was in her hand. She looked so beautiful, he couldn’t think of what he wanted to say. Who was he kidding? He hadn’t planned on talking. He didn’t want to talk. Yeah, something was wrong. She was driving him to drink. He stepped over the threshold, took her in his arms, and lowered his mouth to hers. She smelled so delectable and felt so soft nestled against his body that he wasn’t thinking about anything other than his need for her. His hand moved up and down her back and he realized what she was wearing was so very thin that it felt like he was touching bare skin. His l
ips left hers and moved to her neck and his control was lost. He pulled her tighter to him.
Lily pushed him away. “You shouldn’t be in here.”
He backed up a step, but he didn’t want to walk out of that door. “No, I shouldn’t.” He knew he should turn around and leave, but when his eyes drifted down her body, and he saw her barely there nightgown, a six-gun at his back couldn’t have budged him from that room. He couldn’t stand the thought of another man ever seeing her like this. She was driving him crazy. “Lily . . .” He wanted to take her in his arms and never let her go. What was he going to do? He couldn’t let another man have her. Another man . . . Captain Anderson . . . He couldn’t allow him to make love to her. He wouldn’t let him have her. He moved to her again, but she backed up a step.
Lily glanced at the bottle in his hand. She thought he’d probably had too much to drink. “I think you need to go to bed.”
“Yeah.” His eyes slid to her bed. Another step forward, and she took another step back and felt the bedpost behind her. He threw the whiskey bottle on the bed and placed his hands on her shoulders, his strong fingers kneading the tension from her body. He leaned down and started kissing her neck again and he pulled her closer as his lips moved to her ear. He nibbled on her ear and whispered, “You’re so beautiful. I want you. Let me love you, Lily.”
It hurt to hear him proposition her like he would a soiled dove. She ducked under his arm and hurried to the door. She tried to control her emotions when she said, “Either you leave, or I will.”
He wanted to be sorry he’d asked, but at the moment he wasn’t sorry, and he knew later that would shame him all the more. Where Lily was concerned, he had no control. He knew she didn’t issue empty threats and she would leave, so his options were limited. Grabbing the bottle from the bed, he walked to the door. He leaned over, his lips touching her skin just below her ear again. He wanted to feel the softness of her lips once more, but he didn’t try to kiss her again. “Good night, lovely Lily.”
His deep voice sent goose bumps over her skin. She quietly closed the door behind him and leaned against it, trying to calm herself down. She was hurt and she was angry. A tear slid over her cheek. How dare he treat her like that! She understood how Isabelle must have felt having fallen for Ethan Horn’s passionate attention. Lily was so lost in the moment that she was close to ignoring everything she held dear just to be in his arms, in his bed. She came close to willingly offer herself up to a man before marriage. Grudgingly, she had to admit she was as angry with herself as she was with Thorpe. It wasn’t his fault that she had no self-control around him.
* * *
When Thorpe reached his room, he started a fire in the fireplace. He picked up a glass and poured himself another drink. After he gulped it down, he walked to the bureau and opened the top drawer. He pulled out a small black box and opened the lid. His mother’s wedding ring twinkled in the dim light of the room. He’d been so thankful he hadn’t given Evelyn his mother’s ring. Here he was again at that same crossroad months later. But this time it wasn’t only his mind involved. Doing the right thing was much more complicated when his heart belonged to someone else.
He snapped the box closed, placed it back in the drawer, and grabbed the whiskey bottle. He didn’t even bother with a glass. Pacing his room and drinking from the bottle, he contemplated his situation. He was no closer to a resolution when he removed his boots and holster before he slumped in his chair. He picked up the bottle of whiskey again and gulped the last of the liquid and closed his eyes.
* * *
Thorpe awoke a few hours later to the sound of howling. The fire had died down and the room was dark with the exception of the light shining thought the window. He rose from the chair and walked to the window. The full moon was so bright, it illuminated all of the buildings and land near the house. He looked around for animals, but there was no movement at all. The howling started again and he realized it was coming from inside the house. Blue. He walked to the door, stepped into the hallway, and quietly made his way to Lily’s door. He leaned against her door and he could hear Lily speaking softly to Blue, trying to calm him. He started to knock, but after his performance earlier, he didn’t think that would be a smart move. Blue finally stopped howling, and Thorpe walked back to his room and fell across his bed. Even though he’d only slept a few hours, his mind seemed clearer. He knew what he had to do come morning.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
“Good morning, Thorpe.” The doc opened the door and motioned Thorpe inside. “What are you doing here at this early hour? Isabelle isn’t in labor, is she?” He rarely had visitors this early in the morning unless it was an emergency.
“No, Isabelle is fine. I need to talk to you.”
The doc thought Thorpe looked tired, like he hadn’t slept much in a few days. “Let’s go in the kitchen. I’ll make some coffee.”
Thorpe followed him and grabbed some firewood in the corner and shoved it inside the stove. He had it flaming in no time. “It’s a cold morning.”
“Yep, and just the beginning. I expect we’re in for a good snow.” The doc set the coffeepot on the stove and walked to the table. He pulled out two chairs and indicated Thorpe should sit in one. “You want me to rustle up some breakfast?”
“No, coffee is fine.”
“What’s on your mind, Thorpe?”
Thorpe straddled the chair and braced his arms on the back rail. “Did you know Evelyn’s back?”
“The pastor told me.” So this was what was bothering him. He should have known.
“Doc, you told me Evelyn was pregnant, and I have some questions about that.”
The doc shook his head. “Okay.”
“I know I don’t have to ask you not to let this conversation go further.”
“Whatever you have to say will be kept between the two of us.”
“When she came to you, did she tell you that Ainsworth . . . well, that he forced himself on her?”
The doc couldn’t believe his ears. Evelyn hadn’t acted like a woman who had been raped when he examined her. As a matter of fact, he’d thought she seemed angry when he told her she was with child. “Is that what she is saying now?”
“She told me yesterday that Ainsworth had forced himself on her the whole time he was at the ranch, and that he threatened to kill me if she told anyone.” It hit Thorpe what the doc said. “What do you mean by, ‘Is that what she is saying now?’?”
The doc rubbed his hand over his whiskers. “Thorpe, Evelyn told me you were the father of her child. I didn’t think you were the kind of man that would bed her and not marry her, or if you did, you would soon marry her once you knew of her condition.”
Thorpe thought about what the doc said. Evelyn knew he couldn’t have fathered her child. But she might have been embarrassed, or afraid to tell the doc the truth. “Doc, I did bed her, but it wasn’t my child. What happened between us was later.”
“Did she bring the baby with her?”
Thorpe repeated what Evelyn had told him about Ainsworth pushing her down the stairs at the hotel and losing the baby.
The doc didn’t normally discuss his patients with other people, but in this case he wasn’t going to allow Evelyn to ruin Thorpe’s life. “That’s some story. Thorpe. When I examined her I saw nothing that would indicate she was forced in any way. If a woman has been raped, there are usually signs to indicate such harsh treatment. She had ample opportunity to tell me if such a thing happened. She didn’t act like a woman who had been abused. I’ve seen them, I know how they respond.”
“But it doesn’t mean it couldn’t have happened.”
“No, it doesn’t.” The doc’s dilemma was trying to decide how much he should reveal to Thorpe. He’d heard a lot of rumors about Evelyn, and he knew she was not the person Thorpe thought she was. “Thorpe, it is my professional opinion that no one forced her.” The doc got up and picked up the coffeepot. He poured two cups and pushed one in front of Thorpe. “I should also tel
l you that I’ve heard she had a relationship with Tremayne’s foreman.”
That news caught Thorpe by surprise. “What? You mean Travis? Who told you that?”
“Thorpe, I’m afraid that was the talk for some time after you became engaged.”
Leaning back in his chair, Thorpe digested that piece of information as he drank his coffee. “Doc, I never knew you to be one to listen to gossip.”
“I’m not, and I’m usually not one to pass it along. But to tell you the truth, Evelyn is not the woman you think she is.”
“I don’t think she’s perfect, I know she’s spoiled, but I did bed her and now she wants me to do the right thing. She says she loves me and that Ainsworth forced her. She didn’t want to leave me.”
So that was it in a nutshell, the doc thought. “She came back hoping you would marry her now that Ainsworth refused to marry her. Everyone knows she left you at the altar to be with her lover. I’m telling you as your friend that woman was not raped.” The doc knew he sounded harsh, but Thorpe was his friend, and he didn’t want him to make a terrible mistake.
When Thorpe didn’t respond, he said, “Look, Thorpe, why don’t you go see old man Tremayne and ask him if her story about losing the baby is true? If it is, don’t you think he would have contacted his friend in England to tell him what his son did to his precious daughter?”
The doc had a point. Tremayne wouldn’t allow anyone to hurt his daughter. “Yeah, it wouldn’t surprise me if he didn’t take a trip to England and personally beat the stuffing out of Ainsworth.”
“Exactly. It’s worth talking to him before you sacrifice yourself the second time.”
“Maybe I do need to talk to her father. I can’t take a trip to England right now.”
“There’s something else you should know. Before Evelyn became pregnant she came to me and asked how she could prevent pregnancy. She told me she never wanted children. Of course, I told her at the time there was no sure way of prevention other than abstinence.”
Christmas at Dove Creek Page 27