by Harmon, AJ
Anyway, I can’t believe that in yesterday’s mail I got three rejection letters – on the same day! Three!! I told Evelyn and she just shrugged her shoulders and said that meant she didn’t have to worry about moving yet. Really? Maybe she doesn’t mind being a waitress but it’s not what I want to do with the rest of my life. I want to teach! I’m good at it. I’m a damn good teacher! Well, I still have a couple of applications out that I haven’t been rejected for…yet! And my phone interview is on Tuesday. I probably won’t have heard from you by then. But maybe the next time I do I’ll have something positive to share.
Take care,
Nic
Where are you?
From: Nicole Stewart (nicas821@outloo...
Date: Wednesday, May 01 09:41 AM
To: Paul Lathem ([email protected]...
Hi Paul,
So where are you? Are you back in Afghanistan? Can you even tell me? Well, I hope you’re safe and I pity the poor bad guys that get in your way.
I’m emailing you because I had my phone interview yesterday. I haven’t heard if I’ve managed to move to the next round, BUT, I think it went really well. The gentlemen I was interviewing with asked some really good questions and I was able to articulate what I wanted to say, which is sometimes difficult for me. So, I’m hoping that they liked what they heard. They seemed to, or at least they pretended to. So now I just wait…again.
I had a drink with a couple of friends of mine that still teach at River Grove. (That’s the elementary school I used to work at.) Anyway, they have heard some rumors/gossip that there are some changes in the works for the district. They’re all hoping Jenny gets her ass kicked out, but Leslie thinks she’s either sleeping with the superintendent (I thought he was gay, but who knows)OR she’s blackmailing him with something, because she certainly isn’t keeping her job based on performance!! We’ll just wait and see. Not that it really affects me anymore.
I guess it’s cuz I’m writing instead of talking to you, but it’s really easy to tell you stuff. Thanks for listening, well, reading, I guess. LOL
Really, I hope you are safe and well. I hope to hear from you soon.
Nic
Good news!
From: Nicole Stewart (nicas821@outloo...
Date: Friday, May 03 11:05 AM
To: Paul Lathem ([email protected]...
Hi Paul,
I haven’t gotten an email from you so I’m guessing you are not near any internet access but I had to write and tell you that I have made it past the first round for another job! Yay!! Anyway, I received an email telling me that after reviewing all of the applications I had made it through the first cut. So I have a list of questions I need to answer and return to them next week and then I wait…again. But I guess just knowing that on paper people don’t immediately hate me is a good thing. LOL. I’m kind of excited here. Couldn’t guess could you? ;)
So I’ve watched the news a few times – making sure you aren’t on it. I’m hoping you are safe and not in any danger. That’s probably a ridiculous hope…not in danger? I guess that’s what your job is – being in danger all the time. But I hope you’re ok.
My mom called me today. I haven’t talked to her since Christmas. Did I tell you about her? Probably not. Anyway, it was weird. It always is.
Well, I’m anxious to hear that you’re okay. Please take care.
Nic
Still out of range?
From: Nicole Stewart (nicas821@outloo...
Date: Monday, May 06 08:22 AM
To: Paul Lathem ([email protected]...
Hey,
I’m really hoping that you are still on a secret mission, far away from all civilization, otherwise you’ve just blown me off and have no intention of responding to my emails. LOL. Just kidding! I’m sure you are working hard to protect our country and I thank you. J
Anyway, I wanted to update you on what was happening here…NOTHING! Grrr. I haven’t heard back from anyone and feel like I am living from day to day unable to make plans for tomorrow. Really quite frustrating. If I believed in a higher power I might wonder if there was a plan for me and if this was just all part of it. Or that I was being taught some invaluable lesson. But I don’t so I’m just frustrated. And there’s nothing I can do about it.
Still watching the news every so often. ;) Still haven’t seen you on it so that’s good news I guess. Stay safe please.
Hope to hear from you…eventually! J
Nic
Moving in the right direction
From: Nicole Stewart (nicas821@outloo...
Date: Thursday, May 09 11:05 AM
To: Paul Lathem ([email protected]...
Hi Paul,
Hope you are well…and finishing your mission soon. It feels very James Bond-like saying that. LOL
Anyway, I finished all the questions for the job in Boston. Did I tell you it was in Boston? Anyway, it is and I emailed them yesterday, so we just wait and see on that one. Other than that all is quiet on the job front.
Oh, some interesting news…I got a call from the school board chair here. He wants to meet with me next week. Have no clue what’s it all about, but I’ll go find out. I haven’t got anything better to do, right?
Well, I really hope to hear from you soon.
Nic
8.
We’re back
From: Lathem, Paul R. LCDR (lathempr@nav...
Date: Monday, May 13 10:11 PM
To: Nic Stewart (nicas821@out...
Hi Nic,
I see you missed me! ;) Gotta admit it was nice to open up my email and find several from you. J
Oh, and I’m glad I wasn’t on CNN either! Lol
Okay, so let’s try and answer all your questions. I’m in the northern hemisphere... that I can tell you. The military doesn’t like it when we tell people where we are going for safety reasons, so it’s usually a secret. So when we get back I can tell you where we were and a little bit about it. But I can tell you that our mission was successful and we were able to accomplish more than we had initially anticipated and nobody was injured so that’s a double win.
I’m sorry about the rejection letters. That’s gotta sting. L But my mom has always told us boys that God leads us in a direction and sometimes when we begin to stray from our path, he gives little course corrections. Now, whether I believe that or not is still up for debate, but if I did, I would say that those jobs were not meant to be in your future because there is a much better one waiting for you. Like the one you had your phone interview for or the written questions and answers you submitted. I would like to believe that we are being led, so in this case I will choose to believe that you wouldn’t have been happy at the schools that have decided they don’t want you.
As for your old boss? She’ll get what’s coming to her. You can’t treat people like shit and not expect some kind of payback, or karma to smack you in the face at some point. The hard part is watching it not happen in a timeline of our choosing, but eventually it will. If you have the opportunity you should tell the school board chair what happened to you and to the others you worked with. I believe we have a moral obligation to try to make the world a better place. And sometimes that’s just speaking up for those who can’t do it themselves. Ok, I’ll get off my soapbox now! ;)
So, your mom? You haven’t said anything about her so I am curious about her calling. Feel free to tell me anything you want. J I’m glad that you feel comfortable sharing with me. I consider that one of the highest compliments I have ever received.
Ummm…I think that’s all your questions. If I missed one just remind me in your next email. And no! I would NEVER blow you off.
So I just got word that we are headed back to San Diego on Wednesday. It’ll be nice to get back. I’m not a fan of all this sand if there isn’t an ocean attached to it. haha.
Well, I’d better go. There’s a lot of stuff to get done before we leave so I’ll email you once I’m back on friendly soil. J
Take care of yourself an
d my fingers are crossed for you.
Paul
RE: We’re back
From: Nicole Stewart (nicas821@outloo...
Date: Tuesday, May 14 03:51 PM
To: Paul Lathem ([email protected]...
Hi Paul!
Very happy to hear your mission was successful and you’re back safe. Really good news!
I also have some good news! I have a job interview for the position I had the phone interview for! That means I made it to the final three!! It’s in two weeks and I am really feeling good about it, so…fingers crossed! J
I haven’t heard back yet on the job in Boston. Still waiting.
I’m not surprised I haven’t said anything about my mom…we aren’t what you would call close. You know I watched your family a little bit on the cruise and I can tell you that it wasn’t like that for me. I’m an only child. Actually, I was an accident and I’ve been reminded of that my entire life. If I went all Sigmund Freud on myself I would probably say that’s why I became a kindergarten teacher. When I started school as a five year old, I remember feeling so special for the first time ever. My teacher, Mrs. Hunter, made me feel loved and at the end of the school year I remember crying for days because I desperately wanted to go to school. I needed Mrs. Hunter to make me feel loved and cared for. So when I had to decide what to major in at Norfolk State, I picked Elementary Education so that I could be a ‘Mrs. Hunter’ for a child that needed me.
But, back to my mom, or Heather, as she made me call her for years. She called and wanted to have lunch and ‘catch up’. I told her I was too busy and she actually sounded disappointed. She might call again before Thanksgiving, who knows?!
Well, I gotta get ready for work. I really am very glad that you’re safe! I will wait for your email from San Diego. J
Bye,
Nic
9.
As Nic folded the laundry on her bed on Thursday morning, her mind drifted to Paul. Would she get an email from him today? Did he actually make it back to San Diego yesterday?
The irony of her situation was not lost on her. For so many years she had been raised to despise all things Navy. Her mother had instilled in her a deep-seeded disdain for the men in that branch of the military. Yet, here she was hoping for her cell phone to beep telling her she had an incoming message, from a man in the Navy no less. Her mother would be horrified.
Nic absent-mindedly put socks in the sock drawer and jeans in the jeans drawer and the folded towels on the shelf in the bathroom. She shoved the empty laundry basket in the bottom of the closet and sat on her bed, folded her legs in front of her and opened the lid of her laptop. She opened her web browser and read the headlines on MSN. Opening up her email, she was disappointed to see that it did not contain a new message.
She closed the lid of her laptop and shook her head. This is ridiculous, she thought. She jumped off the bed and checked her appearance in the mirror. She had an appointment in an hour with Mr. Benson, the chair of the school board. Surprisingly to Nic, she wasn’t nervous. She’d talked to her friends Leslie and Wendy, teachers at River Grove Elementary, and they had encouraged her to meet with him. They had said that things at the school were heading downhill rapidly and seeing as though she didn’t have a job that would be threatened if she spoke up she had agreed that she should enlighten him to the goings on of the principal, and her evil little minions. And now she was going to make good on her promise.
*****
Paul sat in the transport aircraft impatiently waiting to be back in San Diego. He wanted to go back to his hole-in-the-wall apartment and have a long hot shower and he wanted to call Nic.
When he’d asked her if she would like to exchange emails, he figured he’d get one or two brief, superficial messages and then she’d be done with him. He’d assumed she’d agreed to his request to be polite. But she’d sent several emails and they were filled with news and thoughts and even feelings which had encouraged him. Just maybe she would come to feel the same way about him as he already felt about her. Although he couldn’t articulate it yet, he knew in the depths of his soul that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, to make a life with her, and for her to be his life. How he knew he didn’t understand, but he did know and he was going to go after it. He just hoped that Nic would comply.
*****
That night at work, Nic looked at her phone about every fifteen minutes.
“Are you waiting for something?” Brian had asked.
Even Evelyn had noticed and she was usually oblivious to everything except that which directly affected her.
“Just thought I’d have an email by now,” Nic had frowned.
“Oooohh,” Evelyn teased. “Waiting for your Navy man?”
Nic rolled her eyes and shook her head. She lifted the tray of drinks from the bar and set off to deliver them to the table of women out for a girls’ night.
By the time Nic returned home, she was irritable and tired.
“I’m going to bed,” she muttered as she threw her purse on the couch and walked down the hall. She stepped into her bathroom and pulled her hair back into a scrunchie and smothered her face in make-up remover and scrubbed away. How quickly she had come to care for a man she hardly knew. How quickly she had trusted him by sharing things with him that were so personal she hadn’t ever told anyone else. All this with a man she had been forced to meet on a cruise ship in the middle of the Caribbean Sea and had purposely been rude to. Yet here they were several weeks later and she realized that she had found someone special. It was quite a shocking revelation. Yet her life was so unsettled that the idea of anything more than friends was obviously out of the question. But she could always use a trusted confidante. And Paul seemed to be fitting the bill.
*****
Paul sat in the office of his Commander. He had made it home, taken a hot shower and fallen into bed to sleep for a few hours before coming back to the base. Now here he sat having just received news that he really didn’t want to get.
“It will be for the remainder of your tour,” he’d been told.
Paul wasn’t really surprised, in fact, under normal circumstances it wouldn’t have bothered him for a second, but things were different now. He was different now. He wandered out of the building and sat on a metal bench under a tree. Pulling out his phone he mentally added three hours to the current time to make sure he wasn’t calling too early. She answered on the second ring.
“Paul!”
“Hi Nic,” he smiled.
“I was expecting an email. This is a surprise.” She didn’t even bother trying to hide the excitement in her voice.
“Well, I had some time so I thought it would be good to hear your voice.”
“You called at the right time too. I’m home with nothing to do until I have to get ready for work.”
“Good!” he grinned. “So how are you? What’s new?”
“I told you about the job interview next week, right?”
“Yup.”
“Well, that could be exciting,” she laughed. “Still no word from Boston though.”
“You only need one to love you,” Paul chuckled.
“True!” Nic agreed.
“Did you meet with the school board guy?”
“I did! And it was rather interesting. He asked me all kinds of questions ranging from the state of my classroom, you know, paint on the walls, air conditioning, tables and chairs, etc., to what I thought of the current administration. I answered honestly, not pulling punches and trying not to let emotion cloud my answers. When it came to discussing Jenny, he stopped talking and just let me talk, and he took a bunch of notes. I promised Leslie and Wendy I would share their concerns, which I did, so I feel like now I can move on. I can leave that chapter behind and look forward to the next. It was actually very therapeutic.”
“That sounds great,” Paul agreed. “Now you are destined to find the job of your dreams.”
“I hope so,” Nic laughed. “So, can you tell me about wher
e you were for the past little while?”
“We were in Somalia, but that’s all I can tell you. And,” he paused, ”I just found out about ten minutes ago that we are being deployed again next week.”
“Oh,” sighed Nic. “How long will you be gone this time?”
“Actually, that’s the part I was just informed about. I’ll be gone ‘til my tour is up in August.”
“Oh,” she repeated. Nic didn’t understand what the emotions were swirling through her body. She tried to remain in control until she could figure out what it was. “I’m sure there are lots of people counting on you wherever you go.”
*****
As Paul packed his bags for deployment, it was with mixed emotions. He was happy to be serving his country wherever he was needed and yet he was sad knowing it would be for the very last time. And at the same time he was optimistic for the future he had waiting for him in August and hoping that his future would include Nic.
They had spoken on the phone for a long time but her demeanor had changed once he had informed her of his orders. And then when he had asked about her mother, she had become quieter and had responded to his questions with succinct answers, nothing more.
He had pondered it all weekend and had realized that he was being unfair in his expectations of her. She barely knew him. His intentions had not been made known to her. They were friends, or at least he hoped they were friends. There was nothing more between them. At this point, he’d said to himself. And they would remain friends. Once he got home and was a civilian with his future to offer, then he could pursue more.
So, once again, he sat down at the computer just hours before his ride to Kandahar, Afghanistan, left, and sent her an email.