by TJ Thomas
When Dawn finally opened her eyes, she had a clear view of Cam’s neck. She leaned forward and kissed it. “Thank you.”
The soft rumble of Cam’s chuckle shook her whole body. “Any time, seriously.”
They lay in silence for a few moments before Cam spoke again. “I can practically hear you thinking.”
Dawn lifted her head to see Cam clearly but didn’t say anything.
“Do me a favor, let’s enjoy this morning. We can figure out what this means after a shower. Care to join me?”
“I thought you’d never ask.”
Cam slipped from the bed and headed to the bathroom. Dawn followed closely behind her. Cam twisted on the water and turned to take Dawn in her arms. She kissed her while the water heated. She maneuvered them into the shower and let the water cascade over them. Cam slid her hand down Dawn’s side, and she skimmed her fingers on the underside of her breast. Then she ran her thumb over the taut nipple and swallowed Dawn’s moan. She moved her mouth from Dawn’s lips and worked her way down her neck to the swell of her breast and raked her teeth across her nipple.
Dawn gripped Cam’s shoulders and her knees threatened to buckle. Cam gave the other nipple equal attention before licking her way down Dawn’s stomach. She knelt in front of her and spread her wet lips before dipping her head and taking her clit into her mouth. Dawn dug her nails into Cam’s shoulders as she struggled to stay upright. Dawn reached a hand around to grasp Cam’s hair and keep her close. Cam held Dawn’s hips tightly, holding her up. She licked and sucked until Dawn’s body reached the peak and she crashed over the other side. The force of the orgasm bent Dawn in half, and if Cam hadn’t been there to catch her, she would have fallen. Cam stood and held Dawn closely. As her body settled, Cam kissed her. Then she took the shampoo off the shelf and lathered her hands with it before plunging them into Dawn’s hair. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to get my hands in your hair.”
“Probably as long as I’ve wanted to do this.” Dawn grabbed Cam’s firm, wet ass and squeezed.
Cam’s laughter echoed off the shower walls. “Probably.”
*****
“How about I make us some breakfast and we can talk?” Cam asked as she rubbed her hair dry.
“Sounds good. I’m just going to run over and put some clothes on. I would just put the robe back on, but I’ve seen what it does to your concentration.”
“Ha ha. You can’t blame me, can you?”
“Hey, I’m not complaining.”
“Thank goodness and you’re okay about last night?”
“Oh, I’m more than okay. Do you have any regrets?”
“The only regret I would have is if what happened last night was too much too soon. If it meant we couldn’t ever be together again.”
“Rest assured. I definitely want more of what we did last night.”
“Okay. Then go get dressed and I’ll make breakfast. Promise you’ll come right back?”
The uncertainty in Cam’s expression hurt Dawn’s heart. She moved to Cam and wrapped her arms around her neck. “I promise you I’ll be back. We’ll have breakfast and talk.” She lightly touched her lips to Cam’s. “I won’t be gone long.”
Cam was sliding the veggie omelets onto plates as Dawn returned. The dogs greeted her as though she’d been gone for days rather than the fifteen minutes or so that she’d been absent.
Dawn wrapped her arms around Cam and laid her head on her back. “Those omelets smell amazing. Plus fruit, toast, coffee, and orange juice…you’re going to spoil me. How did you put all this together in the time it took me to get dressed?”
Cam shrugged. “It’s just breakfast.”
“If this is just breakfast, I can’t wait to see when you make something special.”
“Stick around and you just might find out.” Cam’s expression was unreadable.
“Do you think I won’t?”
“I hope you do, but you seemed to be doing some pretty heavy thinking earlier and I’m worried that we jumped into something last night and you don’t know what it means for you or us. Part of me feels like maybe I took advantage of you while you were vulnerable, and if I did, I’m sorry.”
Only the sincerity and vulnerability in Cam’s eyes kept Dawn’s frustration at bay. “First, you did not take advantage of me. There is nothing for you to be sorry about. I made the first move last night, and even after I did, you gave me more than one opportunity to stop or slow down. If anything I think it was me that took advantage of you. I told you my story yesterday because I trust you. I know you’re a good person and I feel safe with you. I was thinking a lot of things this morning. But if any part of it was regret, it was only because I waited so long for us to be together.”
“Dawn, I—”
“Let me finish. I don’t know where this is going and I’m not sure I need or even want to know that right now. What I do know is I’ve enjoyed getting to know you. You’ve been a really good friend. I care about you. And I really want to have more sex with you.”
Cam sat silently for a moment, either processing what Dawn had said or waiting to make sure Dawn was finished this time, maybe both. Finally, she said, “Sounds good to me.”
“Good. Glad we’re on the same page.”
*****
That evening, after painting for most of the day, Dawn stood at her back window. From her vantage point, she could just see over the fence. Cam played with Mozz and Jack next door. She had a strong urge to join them. If she let herself, it would be so easy to imagine building a life with Cam. She wasn’t ready to make that leap yet. They had just begun discovering one another. Dawn didn’t want to rush things. Not that there was any danger of that given their history so far. When her doorbell rang, she reluctantly turned away from Cam.
Dawn’s hand was poised on the doorknob when she peeked through the peephole out of habit. Both her hand and the blood in her veins froze. Lori. How did she find me? She couldn’t move, she couldn’t even think. Lori pounding on the door yanked her out of her haze and she reached for her phone, opened an app, and started recording. “Dawn, open up, I know you’re in there?”
She couldn’t possibly know that. Could she?
“Please open the door. All I want to do is talk.” Lori’s voice was less forceful and more controlled than it had been a moment earlier.
Dawn still didn’t want to let her in to her home. She did not open the door. “Lori, go away. I don’t want you here.”
“Come on, babe, you don’t mean that.”
“You and I no longer have a relationship. We haven’t for more than two years after the last time you beat me up.”
“You know that was a misunderstanding.”
“I know it wasn’t. How did you find me anyway?”
Lori laughed mirthlessly. “You think it was hard to follow you home Friday night? Now open the door. We need to talk.”
“That’s not going to happen. If you don’t leave right now, I’m calling the police.”
“Don’t do that. All I want to do is talk, but if you won’t talk to me, I guess I’ll have to go have a little chat with your lover next door. That’s right. I know she’s over there playing with her dogs. If you won’t talk to me I’ll go over there and deal with her directly.”
Dawn opened the door a few inches, not even far enough for the chain to engage, making sure her foot was braced behind it. “Lori, she has nothing to do with you and me. Leave her alone.”
“Either we can talk or she and I can. It’s up to you.”
“No.”
“Okay, then I’ll just say this…Either you stop seeing her or I’m going to go next door next time. You and I belong together. Right now she’s in the way.”
“I don’t belong to anyone. Now leave. I’m calling the police.” Dawn held up her phone and dialed 911. Before she pushed the button to connect the call, Lori turned and left. Dawn closed the door and sank to the floor.
She didn’t know how long she’d been there when the doorb
ell rang again. Her heart leapt to her throat. She stood on shaky legs and peered through the peephole. Cam. After a few deep, cleansing breaths to ease her frayed nerves, she unchained the lock and opened the door. Before she could say anything, Cam spoke.
“Are you okay? I just saw Lori leave.”
“I’m fine now, but it’s sweet of you to check on me.”
“I wasn’t aiming for sweet. I was afraid for you. Did she hurt you?”
“No. I’m not hurt. I didn’t let her in the house. Come in. You should probably hear what she had to say.”
As Cam followed her to the couch, Dawn considered how much to tell her. She decided Cam deserved to hear all of it. After all, Lori had threatened her too. Sitting next to Cam on the sofa, Dawn drew strength from her. Although she figured she couldn’t allow herself to do that for much longer. She wouldn’t put Cam in danger. “I made a recording. I thought it might be useful later. I haven’t listened to it yet. Can I now with you?”
“Of course.”
Cam listened to the audio. She clenched her fists. Dawn tenderly rubbed Cam’s knuckles still raw from the day before. “I told you I’m not looking for a white knight.”
“I know. You’re no damsel in distress, but everyone can use a hand every now and then. I want you to feel like you can call me if you need me.”
“I do.”
“Good. So, what’s your plan? Do you think we should call the police?”
Dawn was grateful Cam wasn’t jumping in with suggestions. She was letting her take the lead. She realized she was still stroking Cam’s knuckles. She pulled her hand back and stood so she wouldn’t be tempted to reach for her again. She paced in front of the couch. “If she comes back, I will call the police. Aside from that, I’m not entirely sure, but I think I’ll start with filing a restraining order. You should look into it as well since she threatened you too.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Please don’t do anything stupid. This isn’t your fight.”
“I won’t go looking for her, but if she comes after you or me, I’ll do what I have to do.”
Dawn was too spent to argue the point. “Fair enough.”
Cam stood and reached to push a stray strand of hair behind Dawn’s ear. When Dawn flinched, she dropped her hand. “You sure you’re okay?”
“I will be. I’m just fading pretty quickly now that the adrenaline has stopped pumping. I’m going to call it an early night.”
“I could come back after I get the pups settled.”
“No.” Dawn met Cam’s eyes. “I need some time to think.”
“Take the time you need, but remember I’m right next door. I’m not going anywhere. Lori doesn’t scare me for my sake, but I’m worried about you.”
“I’ll be fine. Thank you for checking on me. Good night.”
“Good night, Dawn.”
Cam stepped onto the porch and waited to hear the chain slip into place before she went down the steps. She drew in a lungful of air, hoping to ease the ache in her chest. Cam feared what Dawn wasn’t saying. Dawn had already started to pull away from her, and she was at a loss as to how to stop that from happening. After their night together, Cam had been afraid something like this would happen. She was scared Dawn would change her mind. But when they talked at breakfast this morning, Dawn had eased her fears.
Now they were back with a vengeance. Cam didn’t know if Dawn was pulling away because of what Lori might do, or if her own fears were clouding everything and Dawn really did just need some time to process everything. An asshole like Lori didn’t deserve to be in the same room as Dawn. If there was anything she could do to stop Lori from hurting Dawn ever again, she would do whatever it took. Even if it meant walking away.
The mere thought of losing Dawn made her gut tighten, but she would willingly walk away rather than see Dawn hurt. She’d survive if what Dawn needed most was for Cam to let her go. She could give her time. They had been here before and moved beyond it. She wanted Dawn in her life but if that put Dawn at risk then she’d do whatever needed to be done to make sure she was safe.
Chapter Sixteen
Dawn found it remarkably easy to file a restraining order or an order of protection as they called it at the courthouse. Once she picked up a copy of her medical records from two years ago, and armed with her recording of Lori from the day before, she arrived at the courthouse expecting an arduous process. But there were advocates ready and willing to assist her every step of the way. By the time she left, she had a TRO, or temporary restraining order, in her hand and a hearing scheduled in ten days to see about making it more permanent.
Once she returned home, Dawn took stock of her life. She tried to seek solace in her gardens. When she was completely honest with herself, she could admit something essential was missing in her life. Her painting and gardening fulfilled her deeply creative spirit. Her sister and parents filled the strong familial bonds she’d always needed. Wonderful friends allowed her the freedom to be herself and to never have to apologize for being who she was. Her work at the shelter gave her a way to give back to those who had helped her. But when she was alone at night, something or, more precisely, someone was missing. There was no one to turn to, no one to share her most intimate thoughts and feelings. Nobody was there to touch her or for her to reach out and savor.
Dawn shook off the melancholy thoughts that plagued her all morning and tried to concentrate on her gardening. She was in love with Cam. She thought about that. If it wasn’t true, she knew she wouldn’t have slept with her. But now Cam was in danger because of Lori. She needed to pull back and gain some perspective, not only about how she wanted to move forward with Cam but she needed to figure out what to do about Lori. She didn’t want Cam hurt because of her. That much she knew for sure.
She stood and brushed the dirt off her pants. If she couldn’t enjoy gardening, she might as well give it up for now and try to be productive somewhere else. She gathered her bucket and headed to the back door. After discarding her gardening tools and hat, she quickly showered. Then, she pondered her next tasks. She wanted to see Cam. No way, the last rational part of her brain screamed. So much for distance, she thought. She needed a distraction, something to keep her from what was already distracting her, Cam. She reached for the phone and called her sister. Voice mail. Damn. So much for Ali’s help. Dawn tried her parents next. Success.
“Hi, honey. This is a nice surprise.”
“Hi, Mom, how are you?”
“We’re fine and dandy. Your father says hello.”
“Tell him hi back.”
“Dawn, it’s not that I don’t like hearing from you out of the blue, but you don’t usually call during the week. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I was just thinking about you and Daddy and thought I should check in.”
“Any idea when you might get over this way for a proper visit? It seems like forever since we saw you.”
Dawn thought about her schedule. Then, inspiration struck. “Why don’t I come see you now?”
“What? You can’t just fly across the country at a moment’s notice.”
“Why not? The art show’s over. I have nothing pressing on my plate for a couple of weeks, and it’s been too long since I saw you and Dad. Would it be okay if I come as soon as I can find a flight?”
“Well, of course it would, honey, but are you sure you’re all right?”
“I’m fine, Mom. It would just be good to get away for a little while, and I can’t think of any place I’d rather go.”
“We’re always happy to have you. When you find out the details, let me know and I’ll have your father pick you up at the airport.”
“Thanks. I’ll call you back in a little while. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Dawn stared at her phone as she laid it on the table. What the hell? Well, that certainly qualifies as a distraction. While she got online to book a ticket she tried to convince herself she wasn’t running away. She jus
t needed time to think, and it would be much easier to do that from a distance. Yeah, right, I’m so running away.
*****
For about a second, Dawn considered simply sending Cam a text that she was headed to her parents. She realized that was unfair. Not only because of what they had recently shared but also if she disappeared, especially so soon after Lori’s threats, Cam would worry. She could only hope Cam would understand.
A few minutes after Cam got home, Dawn texted, “Have a few minutes to chat? I could come over.”
“Of course. I’m out back with the boys.”
Dawn walked through the gate between their yards. Her carefully planned words flew out of her head when she saw Cam. She tried to focus on something else, so she could think. She bent down to pet the dogs who’d come to say hello. The tree Cam had finished planting the day before caught her attention. “Oh wow, that is perfect there.”
“Yeah, it really turned out nicely.”
Dawn turned back to Cam. “So, hi.”
“Hi.”
Dawn could feel the distance between them and blamed nobody but herself. As much as she wanted to close the distance, both metaphorical and physical, she didn’t. She wasn’t sure what she wanted and she didn’t want to confuse the issue any more. She needed to say what she came for and get out of here.
“So…I’ve decided to go visit my parents for a few days.”
Cam took a hesitant step toward Dawn and stopped. “Oh. Okay.”
“I decided this morning when I was on the phone with my mom.”
“Is everything okay with your parents?”
“Yes, they’re fine. I just…need to get away for a little while.” When Cam flinched Dawn realized her choice of words left a lot to be desired. She wasn’t explaining things at all how she’d planned.