192: A Dark Mafia Bodyguard Romance

by Nikki Belaire

  “So that means I’m staying, right? You’re happy with me again? You won’t make me leave?”

  Fucking motherfucker. A fucking punch to the gut. My head hangs low as I plank over her. I have fucked up so fucking bad. She fucks me to appease me. So much apprehension and terror swirling in her eyes waiting for my answer. “You were never leaving. I swear to god I was never sending you away.”

  A furious head bob brushes our foreheads together. Crazy with relief. Her body finally softens, and she smiles. So fucking happy.

  While I’m fucking broken. “Say you believe me Viviana. Tell me you knew that you would always be with me.”

  Fear flashes in her huge eyes from my harsh tone. The intensity of my demand. She flinches and pushes back into the mattress. Fuck I hate myself for scaring her but I have to fucking know.

  “I…”

  She can’t seem to respond. But I can read the answer in her face. The argument playing out to lie or tell the truth.

  “I don’t know what to do.”

  “You don’t have to do anything.” Fuck. I’m fucking angry while my cock’s inside her. Holding her down. Causing her to fear me. Like god damn fucking Arturo. This time it’s me who brings that motherfucker to our bed. “I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry I hurt you after I promised you I never would.”

  Because at this point the wound to her heart is way worse than any damage to her body. I tip down and kiss her. Tasting the tears on her swollen lips. Hating her trembling hands on my back while I thrust into her. Slow and sincere. I have to make this up to her somehow. Someway.

  I maintain this leisurely pace. Loving her gently. Kissing her deeply. Reminding her how I feel. “Did you hear the other things I told my Dad? How smart and brave and gorgeous you are? How much I love you?”

  Her head shakes against my shoulder. Of course she didn’t. “That’s why I was inviting him and my mom to come meet you. I want to introduce them to my amazing fiancée. To see how proud I am that a woman as wonderful as you wants to be here with me.”

  “I do. I do want to be here with you.”

  A breathless whisper that heats my skin like fuel on a fire. “Good. Then there’s no room for any doubt or questions between us.”

  Or anything else. My body takes over now. Falling into the natural rhythm of making love to my girl. I plunge deeper and harder into her sweet heaven. Cradling her head and palming her thigh to keep her exactly where I need her. Close and immobile for my cock buried in her pussy. Our slick skin sliding together over and over as she meets my every thrust. “Do you love me angel?”

  “Y —yes.”

  Even more important. “Do you know I love you?”

  Her damp cheek sweeps up and down against mine and the ache throbbing deep in my gut moves to my balls. Ready to get off. Ready to get her off. “Then let me hear you say it before I fill you up with my come princess.”

  A hard swallow interrupts her panting in my ear. “I love you. I love you as much as you love me.”

  The last word dies in a cry as she explodes around me. Jerking and flying, shaking through the aftershocks while I pound into her. But I don’t release her limp body, holding her tight while I finally detonate too. Secure in the knowledge that she nor any of the babies I put in her belly will ever leave me.

  It’s been a long ass week. So much damn tension still spiking between us. Fucking killing me because I can’t blame Arturo this time. It’s all fucking me.

  I glance over at her, but her eyes remain laser focused on the yellow and green gift resting on her legs. No smile or excitement for the baby shower. At least she still holds my hand with her ringless finger. I don’t want her to accept my proposal unless she means it. And as much as I fucking hate it, and myself, for what I’ve done, I know she won’t. “I’m going to grab an umbrella from the back and then I’ll come around for you.”

  “Okay, thank you.”

  Not just an automatic response any more. I know she’s grateful. More than appreciative of my care and concern for her. But she’s too defeated to offer more. The past six days she’s run the spectrum from fear to humiliation to numb. Simply existing. Ensuring a self-fulfilling prophecy from my misconstrued label of damaged. Maybe she wondered that about herself too. Now there’s no doubt after I so blatantly and cruelly confirmed how broken she is. How broken I think she is.

  I pull open her door, and she quickly slides out of her seat and grasps my hand, head down as always. So docile and compliant my chest aches. Breaking my promise not to rush her, I draw her to me in a one-arm embrace trying to shield her from the fat droplets beating down on the vinyl above us while not smashing the present she hugs to herself. “You look beautiful angel. I want you to relax and have fun tonight. These are our friends, and they want us here. They want you here because they know how amazing you are.”

  “I will try really hard to be normal for you. I promise I won’t do anything to embarrass you.”

  Damn. She could slice me from throat to gut with a jagged blade, and I don’t think the pain would hurt any worse. A new low for us that she makes the same promise to me that Arturo berated her with the last time he beat her. Choking her into unconsciousness from his claim of her embarrassment to him.

  Small feet hustle to keep up with my long strides as I guide her into the open garage. Strewn with damp jackets across the stacks of clear plastic storage bins and puddles spotting the smooth concrete from the dripping fabric. I toss my own black handle to the ground once she’s protected from the downpour and cup her drawn face. Crouching down to her eye level. “Don’t you know that I love you just the way you are? That there’s nothing you could ever do to embarrass me?”

  A dull gaze meets mine. No, she doesn’t know. She doesn’t believe.

  “Viviana! You guys are here!”

  Mia’s welcome bounces through the wide space, and she holds out her arms long before she reaches my girl. Her gait growing slower as her belly grows bigger.

  “Thank you so much for having us.”

  “Of course! I’m just so happy you came! Hayes is making his famous cocktails and dinner is almost ready.”

  She loops her arm through Viviana’s and leads her inside. Leaving me behind. Which is fine. My girl definitely needs her more than me at this moment. Probably the whole damn night.

  Nowak talks in her ear while she shrugs off her coat. He looks as pleased as his wife that Viviana has arrived. Both of them seeming to sense her wounded spirit in desperate need of kind attention.

  “Now this is an old family recipe my grandmother passed down to me from her grandparents. The alcohol is one hundred ninety-two proof, which is the strongest you can buy. It’s almost too dangerous to drink on its own. Dumb kids get themselves killed trying to do shots of it. So you always have to mix it with something else. This one is strawberry-lemonade that I made and left in the freezer for about a month.”

  He pours the slushy mixture into a short tumbler. That I almost want to yank away from her. The festive concoction may be a tradition, but no one endangers my princess. If he gives her too much, it’ll be me who embarrasses her from the fury I dole out on him.

  “You have to drink it in small amounts before it melts and the alcohol separates too much from the juice.”

  “Na Zdrowie!”

  Their glasses clink together from his toast, and she smiles before taking a small sip. Big eyes grow even wider and she nods.

  “It’s strong, but it’s really good.”

  “I’m glad you like it. There’s plenty, so once you finish that one, help yourself to more.”

  He chuckles and nods toward me, leaning against the bar.

  “Because I know Stieler here makes a great chauffer.”

  “Yes he does.”

  This guy’s talking smack. I’ve never driven his ass anywhere. But his dumb comments don’t matter. Only her response. A connection between us no one else understands. All the way back to when I was just her bodyguard taking care of her. Then and now. Prid
e floods her soft voice as she meets my eyes. Until I wink and she blushes, returning her gaze to her cup.

  His mother-in-law impatiently waves her oven mitted hand at him and frowns. Her sharp stare boring into him. “Put that away for now Hayes. I’m getting the lasagnas out and need the counter space.” Her focus jerks to the woman gathering colorful bags stuffed with tissue paper off the kitchen table. “Thank you Maria for taking those into the other room.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  She squeezes between the line forming for the improvised buffet while I tug Viviana closer. Mia’s mom doling out heaping plates of steaming pasta while Hayes opens silver labeled bottles. He gestures to me.

  “Are you joining us for the board meeting on Thursday? We’ve got to get a game plan together to fight this annexation.”

  Before I can answer, Viviana engages him. “They want to annex Lake Wallerton?”

  He lights up from her innocuous question and tosses his cork screw onto the dishtowel. Ready to unload his campaign spiel. And, here we go.

  “They want to, but they won’t succeed. We’re not paying higher taxes for less services. And I have the feeling we’re going to have a battle over the zoning for those of us who rent out our houses during the summer. Some kind of fine line distinction between seasonal sublet versus weekly rental. That’s going to really get pricy with lawyers involved and people losing money over lost bookings if it’s not resolved soon. People are already wanting to make reservations for two summers from now. It’s a total financial disaster in the making.”

  Her troubled gaze flits to me from his rambling. My angel worries for nothing. I brush my thumb across her slender fingers curled in mine. “It’s no big deal. Doesn’t affect us at all.”

  The little crease in her forehead remains despite my nonchalance.

  “I mean we’ve got to‒”

  “Hayes!” Mia finally shuts her husband down. “Their food’s getting cold. Let them eat.”

  A hardy nod from her reprimand and then he laughs. Realizing his faux pas against his guests’ comfort. Finally, now we can enjoy our meal. After we take our seats, I lean closer to my angel and kiss her temple. “Don’t let him worry you. It’s really fine.”

  Her small shoulder rubs against my chest as she accepts my affection. “But you spend so much money on me, and I‒”

  I brush the tip of my finger over her parted lips, and I swear her body responds to the gentle caress. A small gasp as a shiver jolts her slight body. “Believe me angel.”

  “Okay.”

  Now I’m the one to almost shudder. Fuck her whisper is sexy as hell. “Good girl.”

  The garlic bread’s amazing, and the wine’s even better. Especially with Viviana enjoying the merlot instead of Hayes’ risky cocktail. Adorable with her cheeks blazing scarlet from the alcohol and her demeanor calmer than earlier. Although I don’t want her relaxed because of the booze. I want her relaxed because of me. At least she’s enjoying herself. Impressing me that she still has room for the turtle cheesecake after the feast we were just served. Glad to see her appetite is back too after she barely ate at all last week.

  “Come on, let me show you the nursery.”

  Mia speaks to Viviana but three of the other women at our table hop up too. Out of habit, she looks to me for approval. My gorgeous sweet princess. I smile and nod to her. “See you in a few minutes.”

  I don’t like being separated from her, but I know she’s safe. My gaze sweeps across the other men, talking about the games tonight and Monday. All of them familiar faces from the event at the lodge. Except for the oldest man, who I assume to be Mia’s father the way her mother keeps ordering him around. He seems immune to her incessant barking. Just smiles and nods and says ‘yes dear’ on repeat. While I pretend to care about the point spread and the twisted ankle of the star forward who’s been the talk of the entire season but may not be well enough to play in an hour.

  Boisterous laughter explodes from the living room, and I wander over to the doorway. Not wanting to stifle her but she can’t feel abandoned either. Of course my princess sits as demurely as she can on the edge of the huge recliner. Her legs crossed at the ankle and her hands on her lap while Mia and two of the other ladies sprawl on the sofas. The blond even taking her shoes off with her bare feet dangling over the side of the leather arm. Giggly and flush-faced from the booze, that goes down just as easy after dinner as it did during the meal. Although Mia seems drowsy too with her droopy eyes and hand slowly stroking over her belly despite her absolute sobriety.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way Viviana, but your boyfriend’s really hot.”

  The redheaded lady —Denise I think —shrieks and points at her friend. “Mia! That’s terrible.”

  Mia’s head rolls side to side against the cushion in frustration. Her eyes clenched shut. “I know. I’m sorry. I’ve just been so horny lately with all these stupid pregnancy hormones. I mean Hayes is big below the belt, if you know what I mean, and gets the job done. But Roan is so yummy and muscly. I just want to lick him.”

  What the fuck? Is this what women really talk about when men aren’t around? Viviana seems just as shocked as I do. Her face redder than I thought possible. While the other girls just laugh and laugh. Jesus.

  Denise leans closer to Viviana. The burgundy liquid in her glass sloshing dangerously close to the rim of her glass dangling in her long fingers above the thick white carpet. “You can tell us. What’s he really like in bed?”

  A stage whisper that I can hear from here. They really are tipsy. Viviana squirms in her seat, her head tilting in uncertainty. Battling whether to go with the flow and gossip with her new friends, or maintain her normally sophisticated and modest behavior. None of the ladies utters a word when she slowly looks up.

  “My Roan…” A bashful smile shrouds her delicate face. “He treats me like a princess.”

  Raucous cheers echo loud enough to stall the conversation in the kitchen. The men probably as aware as I am the women are talking about us. Fuck, I can’t believe she’s talking about me. My cock jumping to life too from her admission. Missing her as much as I do.

  Chair legs scrape across the hardwood as the guys abandon their discussion to join in the women’s conversation. Or probably more accurate —defend themselves from the stories starting to be unleashed that make my girl’s face grow even more crimson.

  I can’t hold back either and stride to her, needing to be with her. Needing to touch her and hold her and fucking reassure her that we’re going to be okay. She mimics my smile and scooches over to make room for me, but I pull her onto my lap instead.

  No one seems to notice my obnoxious possessive antics as the other men find their own women. Two of the ladies who ate at the dining room table with their husbands carry in the gift bags and boxes from the side table, and Mia’s mom brings in snacks everyone is too stuffed to eat. Surprisingly she acquiesces to her daughter’s request to sit down and relax, scooting into one of the kitchen chairs her father sets next to his son-in-law.

  The best part is Viviana cuddling into me. Chaste yet deliberate as she lays her head on my chest, and I twist on the overstuffed cushion so she can watch Mia and Hayes unwrap their presents. Maybe as hopeful as I am that will be us someday soon.

  Now I get it. When I drop down behind her and tug her back to my chest, I understand why she sits on the floor in front of the fireplace rather than the sofa like she normally does. The spot provides a clear view into the kitchen where I was just pulling out steaks from the freezer for tomorrow. My girl’s trying to overcome the comment I made about her following me around. Bravely changing clothes and making her way to the living room all by herself yet still needing to see me. Be near me. Make sure I am close. When what she doesn’t seem to understand is how close I want her.

  My lips drag across the graceful curve of her neck, and I breathe in her pure essence. Grounding me stronger than an iron bolt. “I’ve missed holding you like this angel.”

  �
��Me too.”

  Her pensive tone confirms my suspicion that her thoughts are spinning. Worrying over something that I probably fucked up. Again. My hands slide to her narrow shoulders, and I roll my thumbs over the knot of her spine. Hoping to release the tight muscles. A sharp yelp burns my ears as she jerks away, scooting around to face me. Trembling as her head twists violently and her fingers clutch her throbbing throat. Protecting herself from the violence she’s too accustomed to let down her guard completely.

  God damn that bastard. I stay as still as I can with the fury gripping me and keep my palms flat on my thighs. Instead of balling them into fists that ache to beat that motherfucker all over again. “I was just massaging your back. Just…a…massage.”

  Speaking slow and calm, I catch her gaze. Blinking back tears while her chest heaves. “I love you too much to choke you. I would never put my hands on you like that.”

  A slow nod but she doesn’t come closer. Doesn’t come back to me. Only bends her shaking legs, tucking her knees under her chin, and watches me. Waiting to see what I’m going to do next.

  Killing me how forlorn and lost she looks. Huddled into herself and relegated to the god damn floor again. “What were you thinking about before I came in?”

  “Mia invited me to go to the movies with her and her friends next weekend. She said a new rom-com is coming out. I don’t even know what that is. I’ve never been to a movie theater before…” She swallows hard, smothering a sob bubbling in her deep inhale. “But I want to. I really, really want to.”

  “Then you should.” Regardless how much the separation stresses me to be apart from her. I’ll figure out some way to protect her. Because damn it, she’ll go and she’ll have a fabulous time.

  “You were right about what you said. I’m not normal but I want to be.”

  Fuck me. “Being invited to go places with your friend is very normal.”