The two of them were polar opposites. She felt the slow, steady cadence of his heartbeat against her bare back, while her heart pounded erratically. His breathing was slow and rhythmic, while she gasped for air. He seemed relaxed and in total control, while she teetered on the verge of insanity. She wiggled and writhed, trying to create the friction she needed, as well as entice him to get naked and join her in the Land of Lust.
“Relax,” he murmured, as his fingers stopped their northerly route at the point where her thighs met the epicenter of her universe. His hands were so close to her sex she felt the heat radiating from them, yet he might as well have been a million miles away for all the good it did.
Frustrated, she tugged, trying to free her hands, which were held securely under his thighs, her arms pinned against her sides. His chuckle sent warm, moist breath dancing down her neck and fury rippling through her body. She growled in frustration and tugged again.
“Relax and stop fighting me. Enjoy every touch and sensation. What’s the rush?”
“Rush?” she sputtered, stunned into stillness. “You call thirteen months rushing?”
He smiled and smoothed his knuckles across her chest, then gathered her breast in his palm. He flicked the nipple, causing her to arch her back and resume the wriggling.
“I’m gonna spend all night scratchin’ that itch, baby. But not until you relax into me and let go.”
She had never been this aroused, or frustrated, in her life. She clenched her teeth and snarled, “I want to let go, but you won’t let me.”
“Look at how fuckin’ hot you are.”
All she saw in the mirror was a wild woman in a frenzied state, desperate to get off and dangerous enough to kill if he didn’t get with the program and make it happen pretty damned fast.
Finally, with whisper-soft touches, he moved his fingers across the sheer fabric at the front of her panties.
She whimpered and thrust again, and when she caught his wicked grin reflecting in the mirror, she resorted to begging. “Erik, please.”
“Please what?” His fingers continued their butterfly caresses, but refused to give her what she needed.
“Please make me come.”
“Don’t take your eyes off that mirror.”
She locked her gaze on the mirror and took a few deep breaths. The throb was agonizing, but she forced herself to relax into him.
“That’s my girl,” he whispered. With one arm wrapped around her waist, acting as an anchor, he used his free hand to fist the fabric triangle of her panties, turning it into a thin, narrow band. He pulled the strip of fabric up and slid it over her sensitive and throbbing clit.
That was all it took.
The orgasm that shot through her threatened to rip her apart. She tried to keep her eyes open, to see herself as Erik saw her, to watch the appreciation on his face as she came undone in his arms, but it was too intense. She arched her back and bit her lip as her entire body shuddered through wave after wave.
He held her tightly to him, never letting go, even when she was sure she’d splintered in two.
“You’re incredible,” he said, as she slowly opened her eyes and regained a form of consciousness.
She would have laughed, but she didn’t have the strength. “I haven’t done a damn thing except enjoy myself.”
***
Erik swallowed hard and tried to scrub away the feelings bursting to life in his emotional wasteland. Kat may think she hadn’t done anything except enjoy an orgasm, but she was wrong. Very wrong.
Something inside of him tore loose the moment he kissed her and burst wide open with her orgasm. Of all the lovers he’d had, none were as responsive and open as Kat. She gave herself over to him completely, and there was something incredibly special about that.
Scooping her up in his arms, he turned and laid her on the bed, situating her ass at the very edge. He pulled her bra over her head, slid her panties off, and knelt between her splayed thighs. He felt like a starving man on the verge of death.
As he suckled her still-sensitive clit, Kat cried out and grabbed the sides of his head. “Erik, please.”
He looked at her through half-mast lids. “Please what?”
“I don’t know,” she said, half sobbing, half laughing.
He rubbed his cheek and chin across the sensitive flesh of her inner thigh, then smoothed the abrasion with his tongue. “You’re like an ice cream cone,” he said, nipping and sucking gently on her inner thigh.
Her glazed gaze caught his and her breath hitched as he nipped her thigh again. “I’m what?”
“Like an ice cream cone.” His teeth closed over the tender flesh at the apex of her thigh. “A little nibble here.” He swirled his tongue in a circular motion. “A lick around the edge of the cone. A suck here. Smooth and creamy and sweet to eat.”
He slid his hands under her ass and lifted her off the bed, which gave him complete access to her sweet cream. He ran his tongue up the length of her slit, savoring her as if she were his own personal treat, existing simply for his indulgence. She gasped and groaned and thrust her hips as he nibbled, licked, and stroked, and in a matter of moments, she erupted again.
His heartbeat pounded in his ears like a jackhammer, and the head of his cock felt as if it would blast off if he didn’t get inside her. While her orgasm subsided, he undressed and rolled on a condom, then slid his elbows under her knees, lifted her off the bed, and thrust into her in one long stroke. Shocked by how tight she was, he immediately stilled and allowed her body to adjust. “Are you okay?”
She wiggled and thrust upward. “I will be when you start moving.”
He grinned. “Yes, ma’am.”
Just like before, they fit together perfectly. It was as if their bodies had been made solely for the purpose of pleasuring each other. She met him thrust for thrust, and they settled into a comfortable rhythm, her body accepting his and his giving everything in return.
He slipped his arms from under her legs and planted his elbows next to her head. Dropping his mouth to hers, he lavished her with deep, passionate kisses. Rather than plundering, like before, he gently stroked the inside of her mouth and savored her tongue.
He stared into her beautiful emerald eyes that were like open windows, always giving an inside view of everything she felt. Right now, along with sexual satisfaction, they were broadcasting deep, affectionate warmth.
What about her? What did she see when she looked at him? Did she see the ugliness inside of him? Or did she see those same feelings reflected.
Terrified of getting too close and allowing that to happen, he squeezed his eyes shut and dropped his head into the crook of her neck. Suddenly, it felt like he was fighting the battle of his life.
It didn’t matter that her body pulled him in, gripped him, and held on tightly. He could not, would not, fall for her. He quickened his thrusts into a relentless, hammering pace, trying to drive the unwanted feelings back. This was only sex. Nothing more. Strictly. Physical. Pleasure.
But when she wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck, pulling him in even tighter, his control crumbled. Despite his scratching and clawing for a hold, he tumbled over the edge and into the terrifying abyss.
He pulled her as close as humanly possible and gave one last searing thrust as his orgasm ripped through him. He fell into a previously unknown world—twisting, turning, completely out of control, with no way to stop and no way of knowing when he’d hit bottom. But all the while, knowing the crash, whenever, wherever, would hurt like hell.
His orgasm pulled her over the edge with him, and she threw her head back, cried out his name on a sob, and arched her body into his.
Too exhausted to move, he rested his head in the safety of the crook of her neck and held her tight as their breathing and hearts settled. When she released her grip on his neck, he lifted his head and risked glancing into her eyes.
And had his heart ripped from his chest.
“Kat?” he whispered,
running a thumb over her damp cheek. “Why are you crying?”
She took a deep, shuddering breath and gave him a quivering smile. “I don’t know what happened. All I know is that it was so intense I started to cry, and I couldn’t hold back the tears. I’ve never had that happen before.” Looking embarrassed, and trying to lighten the moment, she giggled and said, “What did you do to me?”
More than happy to go along with the humor, he waggled his brow and said, “Old Erik secret.” Feeling as if his legs were strong enough to carry him to the bathroom, he kissed her on top of the head, and prepared to make his escape. “I’ll be right back.”
As he struggled to maintain his cool on the trek to the head, her words echoed through his mind. What did you do to me?
He should be the one asking her that, because he knew, without a shadow of a doubt, he was not the same man he’d been an hour ago.
Chapter Eleven
With achy muscles moaning in protest, reminding her of the delicious workout they received the night before, Kat eased into the Adirondack chair on the large deck surrounding Erik’s house. The morning air was cool, but the brilliant sunshine quickly warmed her skin. She propped her bare feet on the railing, then relaxed into the chair with a bagel and a bottle of water.
The sun’s morning rays reflecting off the slow-crawling ocean waves created a magnificent picture. But the sight of Erik playing ball on the beach with Little Bit was breathtaking. He wore only loose-fitting swimming trunks that hung low on his waist. The muscles in his arms, back, and shoulders bunched and flexed in a spectacular display as he leaned back and launched the ball into a high arc.
Her fingers twitched with the memory of how those lean muscles had felt under her fingertips as he’d arched away, then plunged back into her. Waking, wrapped in the cocoon of his embrace, would have been the perfect way to start the day. But it hadn’t surprised her to wake alone.
Throughout the night, she’d felt like she was making love… no, no, no… having sex with a rubber band. At times, they were so close emotionally it was like their souls were fusing into one. And then, when things got too intense, Erik would snap back, emotionally recoiling.
Their wild and reckless adventure in Charlotte had been all about trying to make a bad day better. It had been nothing more than a detached comforting, and exquisite physical release. There had been spinning and flipping and feats of contortionism that had made them laugh as they’d entwined like twist ties. There had been little full-frontal contact and minimal prolonged eye contact.
But last night, emotions had come into play. On both sides. Whether he admitted it or not, Erik cared for her. She knew that wasn’t part of his plan. Hell, it hadn’t been part of her plan, either. But the tenderness etched on his face as he held tight and drove deeply into her couldn’t be denied.
Little Bit’s whining and scratching at the door this morning had given him the perfect excuse to leave the room and have some space. She hadn’t seen the point in getting up and rushing things; they’d have to face the consequences of the night soon enough. So, while he spaced it somewhere else, she took advantage of the quiet and got some much needed sleep.
However, she couldn’t put off the inevitable any longer. It was time to see how much damage had been inflicted and make sure there weren’t going to be any residual problems with their working relationship.
She brushed the bagel’s crumbs from her tank top, took a drink of water to wash down the clump stuck in her throat, then meandered down to the beach. She waited while Erik threw the ball, then said, “Good morning.”
His smile was large and genuine as he turned and gave her a quick kiss. “Mornin’. How’d ya sleep?”
His easy, suggestive drawl tempted her to believe her concerns about the potential fallout were unfounded, and she began to relax. “What little I got was great.”
He smiled like an arrogant male who knew just how completely he’d satisfied his partner, and he was damned proud of it. But then, as if realizing they were getting too cozy, his demeanor shifted, and he went into retreat and withdrawal mode again.
Sheesh, and men claim women are moody?
Little Bit returned with the ball, and Erik busied himself by wrestling it away, then throwing it again.
Irritated, mostly that she’d been foolish enough to think this could work without serious repercussions, she blew out a breath and said, “Look, Erik…”
He turned to her, and the rest of the words hit a roadblock in her throat. Instead of the usual sparkling irises, his eyes were dull, flat orbs.
She hated the strain on his face, and a throb of regret pulsed through her. “My coming here was obviously a bad idea. When Kevin gets back from fishing, I’ll ask him if he minds taking me back to Riverside. Or… maybe Seth would come and pick me up.”
His eyebrows drew into a harsh line over narrowed eyes. “Are you always like this?”
She took a step back, startled by his harsh snap. “Excuse me?”
“Do I ever get a say in what happens between us?” He slammed his hands onto his hips, sending the loose-fitting trunks lower on his waist, and a chill flushed through her at his glower. “It’s like Charlotte all over again. Suddenly, you’ve decided it’s a bad idea and you’re gonna run off again. I thought things were pretty damned good.”
A cool wave rushed around her ankles, anchoring her feet in the cold, wet sand as anger washed through her. The heaviness of the sand matched the weight in her chest as she struggled to breathe. “Yeah, last night things were great.” She challenged him with an angry look of her own. “But this morning, there’s more than a little regret floating around in the air, and you obviously need more space.” She took a calming breath and said, “I just want to make sure things don’t get any more awkward and that we’re able to persevere a decent working relationship.”
He exhaled like she’d punched him in the stomach, then stepped forward and wrapped her in a hug that threatened to squeeze the life out of her. “I don’t need space, Kat, and I’m sorry I made you feel that way.” He propped his chin on top of her head and sighed. “I... shit… I don’t know what to do with you.”
His flip-flopping mood kept her confused and guarded, but she couldn’t resist resting her head on his chest and returning the hug. Sliding her fingers along the ridge of his spine, she muttered, “You seemed to know exactly what to do with me last night.”
“Smartass.” He kept his arms wrapped around her waist, but drew back so he could look at her. “I looked up there and saw you sitting on the deck, and it was just like last night when you were walking around my bedroom. It seemed perfectly natural, like you belonged there.” He stroked the backs of his knuckles across her cheek. “My usual tactics of making sure I don’t get too close aren’t working with you.” He laughed. “Hell, I guess that’s no surprise, since I’m not even trying to stick to my normal tactics.”
Kat wiggled her toes in the wet sand and verbally tippy toed into his personal history. “Why do you try so hard to avoid relationships?” Realizing how the question might sound, she said, “I’m not pushing for one; I’m just curious. Normally, when someone works that hard to avoid something, they have a very strong reason.”
He released her and took the ball from Little Bit, then tossed it down the beach before settling his gaze on the horizon. “I had a fiancée once. Well, an almost-fiancée.”
The agony in his voice and the haunted memories in his eyes sent a sharp pang through her chest. She wanted to reach out to him, but he seemed lost in time, and she didn’t want to interrupt his thoughts.
“I swore I’d never get that close to anyone again.” He grimaced, although she thought he was trying to smile. “I did all right until you came along. But after last night, I want you now more than ever, and I don’t know how to handle that.”
She didn’t know what to say. His past was still so obviously painful she wished she could help extinguish the hurt, but she didn’t know how. She’d also never received a d
eclaration of affection quite so half-assed, and even though it wasn’t meant to be, it was a declaration. And probably as much of one as she’d ever get from Erik.
Sensing another impending withdrawal, she decided to leave first and give him space before he could emotionally pull away again. “I think I’ll go for a run.” Running was her way of working through life’s difficulties, and right now, it seemed like the perfect solution.
He took her hand in his and caressed her wrist. “I don’t want you to go. I mean, going for a run is fine. But I don’t want you to go back to Riverside. Needing you like I do terrifies me, but the thought of not seeing you makes me crazy.” He watched the wave breaking around his ankles, seemingly noticing for the first time he stood in the water. His mouth twisted into a wry smile and he said, “I think I’m in too deep.”
She didn’t know if he meant the water or with her, but she suspected both. “I’ll stay for a little while. Let’s see how things go throughout the day and we’ll reevaluate. Okay?”
He smiled and tugged her closer for a kiss. “Deal.”
As she made her way back to the house, she considered everything Erik had said. She understood his perspective. She spent thirteen months thinking about him. She hadn’t dated anyone else because no one else could compare, and she began to think he ruined her. Yet, she was foolish enough to think they could have a couple of hot nights, finish the business they started in Charlotte and then move on with their separate lives.
Maybe last night when he said, “We’re in trouble,” she should’ve heeded his warning. But she couldn’t have stopped last night from happening any more than she could stop the incoming tide. The desire between them, the sparks, the connection—it was all too powerful, and she was defenseless against its enormity.
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