by Untamed
There it was again, the blush. “Yes, you really have.”
He gently rubbed the top of my hand. “Meka, I really like you, and I know you’re trying to do your school thing, but I just wanna get to know you,” he said sweetly, staring me in the eyes and licking his lips.
“You’re serious, aren’t you?”
He gave a crooked smile. “Hell yeah. Man, you already know what you do to me. I ain’t got to tell you that, and I ain’t gon’ front about it either. I’ve told you more of my business than I tell my homeboys. What you see is what you get with me, Meka. I’m a white boy who has one brother. I came from a single parent home. My mother died and left me some grip. I loved science and took an interest in nursing. My best friends are black men. I love R&B, hip-hop, and gospel. I’ve never been married and don’t have any kids. There ain’t much left to tell you.”
“Well, you gotta love kids to be with me. I’m a package deal.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t want kids. I just don’t have none of my own. Of course, if you give me a chance, I realize your boys are a part of that deal, which is what I signed up for. Knowing you have two sons doesn’t bother me, LaMeka. My mother was a single parent with two sons. How could I judge you? I would never judge you about that. In fact, I admire you the same way I admired my mom. You put it in every day for you and your boys, and I would love the opportunity to be a part of their lives as well as yours,” he said seriously. “I want to be a part of your entire life, LaMeka, not just your ass.”
My heart melted right then. It had been so long since a man showed me this kind of intimate attention. I had been so bogged down with Tony and his nonsense that I forgot how good it felt to be cherished and appreciated. Even so, I was still going to force myself to take things slow with Gavin. There was a lot I had to tell him about my life, namely Tony. However, for the most part, I was definitely throwing caution to the wind and giving Gavin Randall a chance because he indeed was pretty fly for a white guy. Who would’ve thought this shit would happen? But when I looked at Gavin, I didn’t see white or black or, as he would say it, Cablanasian. I saw a man who was willing to be down for me, and that was all I wanted.
“That is the sweetest thing.”
Gavin lifted my chin up, and our lips met for our first kiss. On the real, I’d never been with a man of another race before, but Gavin could kiss. I mean a helluva lot better than Tony, too. Shit, he lifted up first, but I could’ve kissed him forever.
“I better get you home because it’s some shit running through my mind right now, for real,” Gavin said sexily as he rubbed his hands together.
I glanced at my watch. “We . . . we have time. You want me to come and chill with you?” I asked, not wanting to leave him or those lips.
“Hooked already, huh?” He chuckled.
“See, there you go.”
Pulling me close, he hugged me. “It’s cool. It’s whatever you want to do. I just want you to be ready for it. There’s no pressure here.”
“I’m ready,” I declared, staring him in the eyes. “I’m ready for you.”
The smile that spread across his face was priceless. Without another word, he paid our tab, and we walked out, holding hands and cheesing at each other. I was so gonna give him some when we got to his house. Shit, there was no need to keep fighting it. I wanted Gavin, and it had been a long time since I’d had enjoyable sex, so I was more than ready to take my time and enjoy the experience. In fact, it was well overdue.
When we got in the car, we kissed again passionately. He was sending me on a high that I’d never experienced before. He was gonna have to double strap up because the way I felt, I knew we’d be going half on a baby if he didn’t.
“I love the feel of you in my arms.”
“Wait until you feel all of me.” Just then, my cell phone rang. “Hello,” I sang into my phone.
“Meka, it’s Mrs. Light. Tony’s awake!” she said excitedly.
“Huh?” I asked, trying to regroup.
“Come to the hospital quickly. Please. Tony is awake.”
“Oh my God,” I exclaimed happily. “I’m on my way.”
“What’s wrong?” Gavin asked, concerned.
“Nothing. Everything is perfect. Take me to the hospital,” I said excitedly.
“Huh? What?”
“Tony’s awake.”
“The patient?” he asked, confused.
It was confession time. “Yes, the patient.”
“I get that you know him and all, but this is a little extreme. Don’t you think?” he asked. “I mean, we had some plans.”
“I know, but this is important,” I said, facing him. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I found the courage to the release my secret before I could change my mind. “Gavin, there’s something you have to know now. Tony, the patient, he is my sons’ father.”
Instantly, all the color drained from his face.
Chapter Sixteen
Pooch
If I had one more person to put me off or give me some bad news, I was straight gon’ start knockin’ niggas off. For real. If it wasn’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have none, and I did not take too kindly to bad luck or bad news. Hell, I didn’t take too kindly to anything bad. I was a nigga who was used to getting his way, and I’d be damned if I was gon’ let any nigga, bitch, or prison sentence stop that, so I considered all of the shit that was going on right now minor setbacks. If somebody didn’t start getting these setbacks set right, it was gonna be some hurt-up-ass individuals around here. Patience may be a virtue, but I was not a virtuous man, so I simply didn’t give a fuck about being patient. Men of power only had patience with two things—making money and making love. Anything else was unacceptable.
I had spoken to my attorney, and I was pissed about how slow he was being on the particulars of this deal I was trying to strike with the DA, but at the same time, I knew eventually that would come through. It was all about finding the right way to lean to make shit happen. Being straight up with shit never got no nigga far, but I was gonna try it. If not, I knew I would have to lean to the root of all evil. Money. Wasn’t no sense in me being the only hustla locked up. It was hilarious to me how I got locked up for making money by pushing dope, but the legal system was flooded with the biggest and best dope dealers, scammers, schemers, pimps, and hustlas around. Muthafuckas got paid to arrest and lock niggas like me up, but them same muthafuckas was either on drugs, selling drugs, or in cahoots with somebody who was selling drugs. These bitches settin’ up rules and regulations about human rights when it came to murder and other heinous crimes, but they were the ones running prostitution rings, pimping little girls, running pornography, settin’ up hits, and stealing money left to the fuckin’ right. The worst muthafucka to fuck wit’ was a muthafucka in the legal system. Them bitches could lock you up, take over your operation, set up new laws to keep your black ass locked up, and still make it home to dinner on time with their wives or husbands. Those were some bad muthafuckas.
On top of that, I still hadn’t got no more information about Trinity. Ugh. If I was out, I woulda known that shit in an hour. That was the thing about depending on people and not being able to oversee what they were doing. Nothing got done right, or in this case, not the fuck at all. Chocolate said she’d been searching high and low for information, but I wasn’t stupid. That bitch was just glad Trinity was out of the picture. She was glad to be called my girl now, and the only thing she wanted was for me to get out so we could be together and she could be the new bottom bitch. I wasn’t completely heartless. I knew Chocolate wanted to be down wit’ me since before forever, and I couldn’t knock that she’d been working her ass off to keep my books lined up and my appeals intact. She held it down for me like a real bottom bitch should, but I’d only given my heart to one woman, and I was not fucking up and doing that again.
She could ask my first real girlfriend, Kaman, about that. While I loved Trinity since elementary school, Kaman was the one showing me love in junior
high. She was a petite, fair-skinned chick with long hair and a cute little round booty bump and nicely spread hips. I knew even then that she would definitely be a diva to be reckoned with when she got older. Yet, I had never truly paid her any attention because my heart belonged to Trinity. My raging hormones and Kaman’s fast-developing body were enough to make my eyes wander, even if my feelings didn’t. So, it did. I was good to Kaman, and though she was my first, I still couldn’t love her. I’d hurt her so much that she cheated with my childhood best friend, a cool-ass white boy named Ethan. Still, it only turned what little loyalty I had for her cold and my focus back on Trinity.
But who was I kidding? Trinity had always been the focus. Even now. She always would. So, while I appreciated all that Chocolate did, I wasn’t gon’ never feel for her like I felt for Trinity, no matter what she did.
Matter of fact, if she didn’t find out about Trinity, her ass was getting dropped as soon as my feet stepped outside this barbed wire hellhole. Real talk. That was, unless we found Trinity and she agreed to get down with Chocolate Flava. Then I could get some girl-on-girl action at the house and a ménage à trois going any time I wanted.
Yeahhhh, my thoughts drifted. Random thoughts of a better time crept in my mind. That’s what being locked in cage did to a nigga. I hated not getting pussy when and how I wanted it. Granted, it had only been from Trinity over the past few years, but shit, I swear that bitch had pure gold between those thighs. I was missing that shit like a summa bitch, so my fantasies about what I wished I could do with it were running rampant on me.
Shifting my focus off Trinity, I turned to getting that paper. I spoke with Wolf and Chocolate about his girl being a carrier. Chocolate was down wit’ it like I knew she would be, because that would help her out with not being responsible for my books. Besides, she lived life on the dangerous side like that. Man, why didn’t I fall for her first?
But anyway, I had also talked to Lisa about it, but she was all on some losing her job bullshit. She explained if she got caught sneaking money and food, she could lie about that and just get reprimanded, but she couldn’t risk her job, license, and yada fucking yada. She talked all that yin-yang-ass talk, but the next thing she had was my dick deep in her pussy. Now, how the fuck could she explain that if she got caught? Oh, his dick accidently fell inside of me, and I was just moaning because it hurt, not because it was the best dick I ever had in my life like I told this nigga plenty of times before, I thought as I laughed to myself and imagined her trying to lie her way out of it. How the hell you not gonna wanna risk your job to make some real grip, but you’d risk it for some good dick? At least if you lost your job, you’d still have bankroll. So, I took it as she felt the dick was worth the risk. Ha! Well, I couldn’t argue wit’ that. That was why it didn’t bother me that she was out of the operation. For one, I didn’t need no scary bitches on my team when it came down to that. Scary bitches made for stupid snitches. Ya feel me? And secondly, if she kept her nose clean, then I didn’t have to worry about losing out on my “fringe benefits” up in this camp. She had a way of making a nigga feel like a king around this bitch, knowing I had the magic stick.
Damn, I really need some, and I have to wait until Monday. Fuckin’ no weekend workin’-ass bitch. My side thoughts took over again.
It was times like that when I really missed Trinity. For real. Watching that big-booty bitch slide down a pole . . . I can’t even describe the shit. It made me feel closer to God or some shit. It was like heaven on Earth. And niggas wondered why I never fucked with any of my strippers. Shit, I didn’t need to. I had the best shows from my lady in the privacy of my own home.
Frustration grew in me because of the random-ass thoughts, but it was how I cleared my head. It also gave me space to wrap my mind around how this system shit really worked and the true understanding of incarceration. You know they said being locked up was for the rehabilitation of criminals. Now, being that the majority of the world’s criminals were men, I think that was a bunch of bullshit. They know the only two things men love and cannot live without are money and sex, and in the cage, you were cut off from both, so I figured it out: They were tryna kill us, slow and deliberate. Kill us all. Give us the blue balls and charge us a dollar for a stick of gum when they knew we only make fifteen cents a day on duty detail. Summa bitches.
Anyway, random thoughts aside and back to the business. Wolf’s girl had been up in the air about being a carrier. I told him if she didn’t come through, his percent would drop from thirty to ten. Why give him that big of a cut when the only thing he did was pretty much help set up alliances? It ain’t like he had to recruit customers. And a lot of these niggas were like me—locked up for life and then some—so they were on drugs anyway, just killing themselves slowly, making that life sentence shorter and shorter. I couldn’t see it for myself because this wasn’t the end for Pooch Smalls.
At any rate, Wolf had better do some fast talking over there with his bitch. This operation was on a roll, and it was moving with or without her. Still, I didn’t want Chocolate being responsible for all the weight coming through because if she got caught, I didn’t need her with an amount that would land her doing hard time. She only needed just enough to get slapped on the wrist so she could lay low for a while and then continue making it do what it do.
“What are you so antsy about?” Chocolate asked, breaking my thoughts.
“Umm, just hoping Wolf’s girl comes through.”
“I don’t know why you worried about that bitch. You got me. That’s all you need.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. I swear I wish I hadn’t fallen for Trinity’s ass. I took her hand in mine. “I know, baby, but what kind of man would I be to you if I didn’t look out for you first? I just don’t want you to get caught up on some serious bullshit. Let that bitch take some of the wrap. I don’t know her, so I don’t care. That’s Wolf’s problem.”
“You really do care about me, don’t you, Pooch?” she cooed.
“You know I do, baby. I have to look out for my number one.” That wasn’t no lie. I did care about her because I needed her for this operation and my appeals, and in that respect, she was my number one—at the moment—and Lisa was my number two.
That tidbit caused a bright smile to spread across her face. “I put some money on your books, and Stein is trying to meet with the DA this week.”
“That’s my girl.” I rubbed her chin.
“So, you think that’s gon’ be enough to get you started?” she asked, referring to the weight I already had.
“Yeah, for now,” I said, rubbing my hands together.
“Just let me know. My dude Skrilla said he’s definitely all in. He remembers how you used to do on the streets.”
“Tell Skrilla it’s a bet.” I beamed, feeling good about the news I was getting. It seemed some things were lining up. I just wished this Trinity situation would line up.
“What?” she asked, looking at me, puzzled.
I shook my head. “Nothing. Why?”
“You looked like something was on your mind.”
“Well, I do have a lot of shit to think about, don’t you think?”
I didn’t want to admit that I had been thinking about Trinity. I wanted to ask Chocolate about her, but she was just starting to do shit right, so I fell back on it for now. I didn’t need this bitch gettin’ all blowed the fuck up, especially since I just laid it on thick about her being my girl and looking out for her. I guess I was learning patience. This situation was definitely giving me no choice with that. Right now, I needed this bitch, so I had to play my cards right.
“Yeah, I know that, baby. I’m just saying it looked like a little extra was on your mind.” She shrugged.
Shit, a little extra was on my mind, and to be honest, she unknowingly gave me a great idea. I looked around. I always had her pick this corner because with my back turned, the guards couldn’t see Chocolate or what she was doing. Originally, I chose it so we could discuss our dope deali
ngs without eyes and ears, but being as such I was hurting for some loving, it was about to get used for other purposes.
I unzipped my fly. “I do have something extra on me, but it ain’t on my mind. You could release some pressure for me.”
A devilish grin graced the corners of her lips. “What if I get caught?”
“You won’t.”
“You do realize this would be our first actual time together, ya know, outside of masturbating off pictures.”
Now she wanna get all sentimental. Fuck that. I needed to bust a nut, not get romantic. “Yeah, I know, but it ain’t gon’ happen if we keep talkin’ about it.”
She nodded and acted like she dropped her purse. She crawled under the table, and the next thing I knew, my dick was in heaven. My eyes rolled back as I imagined Trinity’s lips wrapped around this pipe, and I swear fo’ the good Lawd, in a record thirty seconds, I blew like a volcano. Fuck. I missed Trinity. I zipped up as she got up and wiped her mouth with her Kleenex.
“Man, I wish you could do me. You taste good, baby.”
“You know how I do it.” It was all that damn fruit Lisa gave me. She said I had to taste right for her to be swallowing. Damn, thanks, Lisa. “You could just play wit’ yourself in front of me.”
She jumped at the chance. “You know I never wear undies anyway.”
“On second thought, never mind. As much as I’d love to see that, I can’t bust no more. It took all my energy not to holler on that last one.” I stopped her.
She pouted. “I gotta hurry up and get you out.”
You ain’t lying, I thought. I looked up and saw Wolf walking toward me. As he walked past, he gave me a head nod. I nodded back and turned to face Chocolate.
“That’s Wolf, and his girl is down.” I slid her telephone number to Chocolate. “Her name is Adrienne. Call her and get her straight.”
“Is that his girl leaving?” she asked, looking directly at me.
Damn, this bitch was learning quickly. I might have to keep this ho after all. “Yep.”