He grew still. “Done what? Fucked you with their fingers?”
“No. . .ah. . .I’ve never had an orgasm that I didn’t give to myself.”
“You haven’t? But you’ve had sex before.”
“Yes.”
“None of those selfish assholes ever gave you an orgasm?” his voice was filled with disbelief.
“I don’t think they knew, I, um, faked it.”
He let out a low rumble of disapproval. “You were doing them no favors. How are they meant to improve if they don’t realize how bad they are?”
“Well, I didn’t really think of it as my job to instruct them,” she said primly.
His chest moved up and down and she leaned up on her hands to see him grinning. She smiled back, unable to resist the warmth in his gaze or that cheeky grin.
“I suppose it was my duty for all womankind,” she said with a huge sigh. She shook her head. “I let down the side.”
He drew her in for a soft kiss then settled her on his chest. “I hope that orgasm lived up to your expectations then.”
“No, it didn’t.”
He stiffened.
“It exceeded them.”
“Jesus. Give a man a heart attack why don’t you?”
“Had to pay you back somehow for making me ask for permission.”
He patted her bottom lightly. “Word of warning, from now on all your orgasms are mine to give or take away. No more making yourself come without me there to supervise.”
“You can’t watch!” she protested.
“Why not? That would be sexy as fuck.”
“It would?” she asked curiously.
“Oh hell yeah.” He shifted around uncomfortably. “But we might need to stop talking about sex before my balls turn permanently blue.”
God, she was so selfish. She immediately reached out to cup the balls in question and he grabbed her hand. “What are you doing?”
“Um, I thought. . .well, I could help you with your, ah, situation.”
“Situation?” he said with clear amusement.
“Yes, your blue balls situation.”
“I appreciate the offer, sweet pea, but tonight was just about you.”
“A-about me?” Was he for real? He wanted nothing in return? Did men really give without receiving?
“Yes, baby girl. I like to give. I don’t need to take.”
“That doesn’t seem fair.”
“Don’t worry, there will be times I take from you. Relax, baby. I’m taking care of you tonight.”
“You always take care of me. One day, you’ll have to let me take care you.”
He kissed her head. “It’s enough for me that you want to.”
It wasn’t enough for her, though. She wanted to show him that she could look after him. She yawned. But maybe not now. Fatigue had her body growing heavy.
“I should go clean up.” She hoped she hadn’t left a wet patch all over him. She cringed inwardly as she tried to push away from him.
“Easy, baby. Lie still.” He held her against him.
“But I’ve probably made a mess.”
“Like I said before, little girls can be messy sometimes. Daddy doesn’t care.”
This was a different type of mess than what they’d been talking about before but if he didn’t care. . .she settled in with a sigh.
“That’s it, sweet pea. Just relax. Nothing will harm you while Daddy’s here.”
She drifted, dozed. Only rousing when she felt herself being lifted into the air.
“Daddy?” she said sleepily as he carried her.
“Sh, baby. I’m just going to put you to bed.”
“Oh.”
“Can you go potty for me?”
She felt herself being lowered then something cool and hard under her and realized she was now sitting on the toilet.
“Daddy! I can do this on my own.” The childish note in her voice wasn’t really helping her case.
“Baby, you’re half-asleep. I’m not leaving you. But I’ll turn on the tap.”
To her surprise, she found she could go with him in the room with her. Jeez, what happened to keeping a few secrets between them?
“I’m killing the romance,” she muttered as she cleaned herself up quickly before he could help.
He snorted. “Not sure you’re understanding the sort of relationship I enjoy, baby. The more things I can do for you, to help you, the more satisfaction and enjoyment I get. I’ll give you all the romance your little heart desires, but at the end of the day, Daddy just wants to take care of his little girl. That’s what fills my bucket.”
“Fills your bucket?” she asked as he helped her up and led her over to the sink. She let him wash her hands. Hell, who was she kidding? She could barely hold herself up. She wasn’t letting him do anything.
“Something Nan used to say. About how when I was around, her bucket was full. Of love,” he added.
“That’s so sweet.”
He lifted her up, but instead of carrying her bridal style, he settled them chest to chest with his arm settled under her ass. She snuggled into him as he walked into his bedroom.
Could things get more perfect?
12
She woke up alone.
Yawning, Gigi looked over at the space where Macca slept last night. She’d never slept as well in her life as she did with Macca curled up around her, protecting her. She sat up, wondering where he was. Then she noticed the bottle of water and note on her bedside table.
Sweet pea,
I’ve gone for a run before it gets too hot. Stay in bed and have a lie-in until I get back.
Also, drink your water.
Daddy xoxo
Warmth filled her belly, even as she rolled her eyes at his bossy note. Still, she picked up the water and took a few gulps. Surprise filled her at the taste and she took note of the pieces of cucumber floating in the bottle. Well, who knew cucumber could taste so good in water?
She climbed out of bed. She didn’t care what he said, she had to get up to pee. After she used the toilet and washed her hands, she stood in front of the mirror. Still too pale. Washed out. Too thin. Although with the way he kept feeding her that might not be the case for long.
She turned her back to the mirror and lifted her nightie up, craning her neck to study her bottom. It felt a little tender but nothing major and it looked like normal. She dropped the nightgown and then realized she hadn’t brushed her teeth last night. Gross.
Her stuff was in here since this was the main family bathroom. She quickly brushed her teeth and her hair then washed her face. Okay, she felt a bit more decent now. She’d feel even better after a shower.
Macca would have a fit if she had a shower when he wasn’t here, though. He was a little bit overprotective. She didn’t want to make him mad. Or worse, make him worry. She could wait until he returned.
She was just climbing back into bed when she heard the front door shut. Then he appeared in the doorway.
Holy shit.
He ran without a shirt on? All those tanned muscles on display. And the guy was built.
Holy. Shit.
Wide shoulders. A rippling six-pack. And a V that led down to you know where. . .she hadn’t realized mere mortals had those V’s. She’d figured they were photoshopped on or the only men that had them devoted every hour to the gym.
And to top it off, all that deliciousness was coated in a sheen of sweat. She didn’t care what anyone said. . .that totally did it for her. Her gaze went lower to his shorts, which were far too short for her peace of mind. Down his muscular legs. Should legs be a turn on? They shouldn’t be, right? But she swore the more she stared at them, the more flushed she grew.
He leaned against the doorway, then crossed his arms over his chest.
“Like what you see?” he drawled.
She knew she’d grown beet red. Oh God. What are you doing ogling him, Gigi?
“I don’t know, I kind of like you ogling me.” He grinned at her. His sa
ndy-blond hair was flicked back and his lips curved.
Fuck. Her.
Like please. Do that. Do it now.
“Please say I didn’t say that out loud.”
His eyes danced and his grin widened. “What was that, sweet pea?”
“Nothing,” she said hastily. “I just seem to be having a hot flush. If it continues on you may need to take me back to the hospital. . .or perhaps just cover up or something.”
He threw back his head and laughed. She grinned. She loved listening to his laugh. Loved that she could do that for him. He moved towards her. What was he doing? He shouldn’t come closer to her. Couldn’t he see she was about to self-combust?
He leaned over her, placing his hands on either side of her as he leaned in to kiss her lightly. “You’re good for my ego.”
“Hm, I’m not certain that your ego ever had, um, shrinkage issues.”
He let out another bark of laughter. “No, I don’t think it has ever suffered from that.” He ran a finger down her cheek.
“How did you sleep, baby girl?”
“G-good,” she said, her breath hitching as he ran his finger across her lips.
“Yeah? Me too. I like having you to snuggle.”
“Oh God,” she groaned as he ran that finger down her neck and across the tops of her breasts.
He grinned at her wickedly. “I think it’s only fair that if you get to ogle me that I do the same, don’t you think?”
Her eyes widened. “You want me to take my top off?”
“Hm.” Suddenly, he straightened abruptly, running his hand through his hair.
Shoot. Why hadn’t she just done it? Now he was moving away from her and that was the last thing she wanted.
“Sorry, sweet pea. Shouldn’t start anything I can’t follow through on.”
“Why not?” She winced. “Crap, I definitely said that out loud.”
He just smiled and shook his head. “I need a shower, baby girl. And you need some breakfast.”
She pouted. “I’m not hungry for food.”
“I think I’ve created a monster.”
She winced. “Sorry. It’s just hard when you’re standing there, looking like some ad for Nike or something. . .”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Oh yeah.”
“Thank you, baby. And trust me, I definitely want to explore more. . .when the time is right.”
Well, she’d thought the time was right now. But she guessed she could wait. Maybe.
“Let me clean up, baby, and I’ll make us some breakfast.”
“I can make breakfast.” She pushed back the covers of the bed.
He pointed his finger at her. “You can stay right where you are. Have you used the potty?”
“Can you please call it a toilet!”
His eyes danced with amusement. “You didn’t mind calling it a potty last night.”
She tugged the covers up over her head. “Daddy!”
His laughter reached her ears, making her insides swim in happiness. The covers were tugged away from her and he kissed her gently.
“Right, sweet pea. Stay in bed, please, until I come back. You can watch TV or play with Bunnykins and Kiki.”
“Okay, Daddy.”
“That’s my good girl.”
* * *
“I feel fine,” she argued. They’d both showered and had breakfast and were sitting at the dining table, arguing over whether she got to go with him today to visit Penny.
“It might tire you out too much.”
She gave him a look. “You won’t let me do too much.”
“Too right.” He studied her. “I still think you need to stay home and rest. Follow the doctor’s orders.”
“But I have been resting! Please let me go, Macca. I haven’t seen her in ages.” Tears welled in her eyes and he sighed.
“All right. We’ll go soon and then we can come home and you can have a nap. Maybe you’d like to spend the afternoon as Little Gigi.”
She rubbed her finger over the old wooden table they sat at. “Yeah, I think so.”
He reached over and clasped her hand with his. “Don’t be nervous, baby. We can go as fast or slow as you need.”
Seriously, he was perfect.
“Well, thank you,” he said dryly. “But watch out or my ego is going to get so big it will explode.”
She rolled her eyes at herself as he picked up the plates and walked inside, his laughter following behind him.
She really was such a dork.
13
She dropped her head to hide the tears that dripped down her face. It wasn’t fair for her to lose it in front of Macca, when it should be her supporting him. No, it was selfish, so she turned her head from him and quickly wiped away the tears and hoped he wouldn’t spot them.
She should have known that was an impossible ask.
“Sweet pea? What is it? Are you feeling all right?”
“I’m fine. I’m just going to use the bathroom. I’ll be back.” She stood and moved towards the door. She only got a few steps, though, before his large, warm hand wrapped around hers. He tugged at her gently.
“Look at me, Gigi.” His voice was gentle, but firm.
She sighed and turned to look at him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to start. . .”
She was cut off as he pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. “Don’t apologize. You don’t ever need to apologize for caring about someone.”
“I wanted to support you, though. She’s your nan. You shouldn’t have to be strong for me!”
“Baby, come here.” He led her back to the chairs and sat in one, settling her onto his lap. She stiffened slightly, looking over at Penny, but she never stirred.
He drew her in, rubbing her back with long, slow movements of his hand. “I love that you want to support me. Thing is, you don’t have to do anything except be here and you’re helping me. Just knowing that you care about her. That you’ve been here for her and that she’s meant more to you than just a paycheck—”
“Of course, she means more to me than that, you don’t know—” Of course he doesn’t know. Because you haven’t told him it all.
She should tell him everything. But she couldn’t. The words caught on her tongue. She wasn’t ready yet.
He watched her curiously.
“You don’t know just how much she means to me.”
“She’s a special woman. And I feel so guilty that I didn’t know she was ill. That I didn’t see her more often than once a year.”
“She always told me that just seeing you once a year made the time you did get to be together that much sweeter.”
He nodded. “Yeah. I know what she meant. I just wish she would have moved to the US. However, she loved her house, loved living here.”
“She looks so frail lying there. When I think of her, I think of how strong she is. I wish I had her strength.”
He kissed the side of her head. “You and me both, baby girl.”
They sat there for a while longer, talking to each other and to Penny. When they stood to leave, they froze as she moved and murmured something.
“Nan?” Macca leaned over her.
She opened her eyes and smiled. Then reached up with a frail hand to pat his cheek. “My boy. I knew you’d come for her. Look after her.”
He clasped hold of her hand. “I will, Nan.”
“Love you,” she told him.
He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “Love you too, Nan.”
Her gaze turned to Gigi. “My girl.”
Then she closed her eyes and went back to sleep. Gigi stood there, hardly daring to breathe, not wanting to make any noise and interrupt whatever Macca was thinking about as he stood over his nan, holding her hand.
Finally, he stood and let go of his grandmother’s hand then he turned to her and held out his hand. “Come on, baby girl. Let’s go home.”
* * *
As he sat at the dining table and sipped his coffee
, his mind was occupied with thoughts of his nan. Old memories and regrets. When they walked through the door into her house, it seemed to weigh on him even more. If it wasn’t so hot, he’d go for another run, try to get out of his head. Maybe he could go for a swim.
He turned to Gigi to ask her if she’d be okay for an hour or so, when she surprised him by slipping her hand into his. They’d stopped on the way home and grabbed a quick sandwich, but he hadn’t even tasted his. In fact, he wasn’t even certain if she’d finished hers.
“Daddy, do you want to play?”
He blinked down at her, surprised she’d slipped into Little mode like that without any prompting from him. He frowned. Did he want to do this now? Didn’t he want to be on his own? He opened his mouth to tell her that, then shut it. Actually, maybe this was what he needed. And from the look in her eyes, a mix of concern and caring, he thought maybe she knew that.
“Well, you should be going down for a nap.”
Disappointment filled her gaze. “I don’t need a nap, Daddy.”
“Hm, I suppose we could play for a while before you have to nap. But you are still having a nap, little miss.” He tapped her nose playfully.
“Yay! What should we play? I don’t really have any toys.”
Hm. That was an issue. Then something occurred to him. “I might have something. Why don’t you get Bunnykins and Kiki and go potty if you need to? I’ll meet you in the living room soon.”
“What? You mean I can use the bathroom on my own?” she muttered.
He turned back and gave her a sharp smack on her ass. “Don’t be cheeky.”
As he wandered towards the storage room, he was surprised to find he had a smile on his face. Maybe this was exactly what he needed.
When he returned with the old-fashioned suitcase a few minutes later, she stared at him in confusion. She was kneeling on the floor with her two soft toys. It made him sad that she didn’t have a huge collection of stuffies to play with. She deserved to be coddled and spoiled.
Well, he could do that while he was here.
He set the suitcase down on the floor and opened it, inside there was a plaid blanket.
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