“It really would be about the music for you, wouldn’t it?” she predicted.
Knowing Sheck, fame wouldn’t faze him. Wealth would be a nice bonus, but he wasn’t the materialistic type. Despite his easy-going nature and good sense of humor, Rory knew he was a brooding artist type through and through.
“Yeah, I guess. But I know for you the draw is fame, so that’s the part I’m trying to sell!”
Rory turned to look at him and saw the spark in his eye. His poker face wasn’t quite as indecipherable as his father’s. While Sheck might be a puzzle at first, Rory could always put the pieces together if she tried hard enough.
“You’re not just playing around, are you?” she realized with a touch of amusement. “You really do want to start a band!”
He scowled. “Well when you say it like that it sounds pretty lame.”
She laughed. “Come over this weekend, okay? Apparently I have a ton of homework to catch up on, but after that we can talk about this band thing more.”
Rory secretly thought Sheck’s idea was kind of insane. It sounded like something that would be destined to fail before it ever got off the ground. Normally that alone would be enough to dissuade her from doing it, but this time she wasn’t just thinking about herself. Anything that would keep Sheck away from Cricket Lake – and all the drugs he did there – was fine by her.
“Sounds good to me,” Sheck said agreeably. The school bell rang and he grimaced. “I guess we’d better get inside. It would be a shame if we were late to class and missed out on something exciting,” he said sarcastically.
“Absolutely,” Rory agreed with a smirk on her face. “I can’t wait to get to algebra class and find out what “X” actually equals. I just know I’ll be on the edge of my seat. I’m so excited I just might pee myself!”
“Please get out of my car if you’re planning to pee yourself.”
“Touché!” she huffed in mock indignation as they watched a steady stream of students trickle back into the school. Although her tone was playful, the expression on her face hinted that there was something more serious going on beneath the surface.
Sheck waited patiently, making no move to leave.
Rory bit her lower lip apprehensively as she appeared to struggle with a decision. Uncertainty flickered in her blue eyes. Then, finally, she spoke. “Actually, could I ask you to do me a favor after school today?”
“That depends,” Sheck informed her. “If I say yes, do you promise not to pee in my car?”
“Too late,” Rory joked, pretending to look embarrassed. “But seriously, there’s something important I need to do and I could use a ride.”
CHAPTER 13
Rory stayed in class until the end of the school day, but her mind was a million miles away. She’d decided she had to see Carson. She needed to apologize to him in person for all the trouble she’d landed him in.
His phone call that afternoon had been so brief that she didn’t have a good sense of how he was feeling about things. He’d flirted with her a bit but that was no guarantee that he wasn’t furious with her. Maybe he was just stuck at home bored to death and needed someone to talk to in order to pass the time. She wasn’t about to read too much into his phone call…that would just be setting herself up for disappointment.
True to his word, Sheck was waiting for Rory after class. He didn’t seem surprised when she asked him to take her to Carson’s house. Instead, he simply asked her to direct him to the right address.
“You’d make a good rockstar,” he teased. “You’ve already got experience with having your own personal chauffeur!”
“Oh please,” Rory chortled. “You love driving me around. You practically beg to drive me around! You should be a cab driver!”
“Maybe I will be,” Sheck shot back.
“I thought you were going to be a rockstar?”
He laughed. “Well I’ll consider a career in cab driving after I’m an old washed up has been.”
“There’s Carson’s house!” Rory hissed as they neared the brick two storey home at the end of the street. “Don’t pull up in front of it! We need to be discreet! Park the car over there on the other side of the street!”
“Jeez,” Sheck complained good-naturedly as he complied, “I always imagined being a spy would involve a lot more excitement and a lot less bossing around.”
“Sorry. I’m nervous.”
“Uh huh, clearly…so what’s the deal with this guy anyway? Why are you so hung up on him?”
Rory shrugged. “Why are you always staring at that redhead whose locker is near yours?”
Sheck shrugged, mimicking Rory. “I dunno. She’s hot.”
“So is Carson.”
“Fair enough, but this is a lot of trouble for someone who’s just hot.”
“Well it’s more than that.”
“Alright, so tell me. What makes Carson Keller so great?”
Rory nibbled on her lower lip the way she always did when she was put on the spot. “He’s like, effortlessly good at everything he does. Sports, school…you name it, he excels at it. He could be all arrogant about it but he isn’t.”
“No?”
“No. I mean, he’s never seemed that way to me. He’s humble, almost like he doesn’t know how amazing he is. He doesn’t make fun of people, even when his friends are doing it. He holds doors and says ‘thank you’ and when he looks at you it’s like he really sees you, you know?”
Sheck raised an eyebrow.
Rory looked down and fiddled with her watch, her cheeks flushed. “Now I feel dumb for rambling on and on about him.”
“Nah,” Sheck assured her, “It’s cool. I just hope for your sake he’s everything you think he is.”
“Why does everyone keep saying that?” Rory grumbled. “First Rebecca tells me I could do better and now you’re warning me…do you guys know something I don’t?”
“Nah,” Sheck assured her. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt. None of us do.”
“Well I don’t want to be hurt either!” she pointed out.
“I know.”
“Look!” Rory gestured animatedly to a middle aged couple exiting the Keller residence arm in arm. “That must be his parents!” She and Sheck watched them drive off and then Rory nervously commented, “I guess this is my chance.”
“I guess so,” Sheck agreed. “Should I stick around?”
“No, you can go. Thanks…for everything.”
“No biggie,” he said dismissively. “Hey – good luck.”
On shaky legs, Rory crossed the street and walked up to the front door of Carson Keller’s house. She hesitated and then lifted the large brass knocker on the door. A moment after she knocked, she heard footsteps on the stairs.
The door opened.
There stood Carson, wearing a hoodie and jeans and looking as effortlessly sexy as ever.
He looked surprised to see her, but not displeased.
“I know I shouldn’t be here and if it’s going to get you in even more trouble tell me and I’ll leave,” the words tumbled out of Rory’s mouth one on top of the other. “I just wanted to come here and tell you in person how sorry I am…”
She trailed off uncertainly when Carson held up a hand to quiet her. “My parents went out for drinks with friends,” he told her. “They won’t be back for a couple hours. Come in.”
And just like that, Rory found herself sitting on a couch in Carson Keller’s living room.
“So you’re…grounded?” Rory asked as she looked around the room, trying to take in her surroundings without looking like a snoop. She knew Carson’s dad was a physical therapist and his mom taught at the community college. It was apparent they made good money because their living room was beautiful, like something out of a magazine.
It figured that everything about Carson’s life was perfect. Rory wouldn’t have expected anything else. Well, at least his life had been perfect before she’d walked into it. She was beginning to wonder if she was cursed.
“Yep, grounded until I’m forty,” Carson replied with a roll of his eyes. “My parents tend to overreact. Needless to say they weren’t too impressed when they got the call that the cops had hauled me in. But my grades are good enough that I’ll still graduate this year. I just won’t be allowed at the graduation ceremony…oh well.”
“I’m so sorry, Carson,” Rory apologized, well aware that her words didn’t seem like enough. Regret was written all over her face when she looked at him. “I never meant for you to get involved in any of this.”
“You keep apologizing,” Carson pointed out, “I’m not sure why. You didn’t do anything wrong. If anyone needs to be apologizing, it’s Jeremy.”
He settled onto the couch next to Rory and then stretched his long legs out in front of him. He looked up at her and earnestly confessed, “If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn’t change anything.”
“Really?” she asked.
He looked uncomfortable. “I mean about standing up for you. I’d do that again in a heartbeat. Obviously there are other things I’d change if I could. I wouldn’t have turned a blind eye to Jeremy’s behavior for so long. And Grace…God, that poor girl, I had no idea what she was going through.”
Rory nodded, a lump in her throat. “I don’t think anyone did.”
Carson cleared his throat and reached for the TV remote. “Want to watch TV?”
Rory blinked, taken aback by the random change of subject. “I, uh…I guess?”
Picking up on her reaction, Carson tossed the TV remote aside. “Yeah you’re right, that was a dumb suggestion,” he conceded. “It’s just that…when we sat down I really wanted to kiss you but now given the conversation it wouldn’t exactly be appropriate, you know?”
Rory nodded in agreement, momentarily distracted by the mention of Grace. Then Carson’s words sunk in. She raised her eyes to meet his, a flicker of hope rising up inside her. “You wanted to kiss me?”
“More than anything,” he nodded.
“So you’re not mad?”
“Mad at you? No, absolutely not…”
“But I’ve probably cost you a football scholarship,” Rory pointed out hesitantly.
To her utter amazement, Carson merely made a dismissive gesture. “My father played college football,” he explained. “So did my older brother, before he made a mess of his life. I play because it’s expected of me. Sure, it was fun to play the game and nice to be a part of something but football has never been my dream.”
“But the scholarship…?”
“I don’t mean for this to sound like I’m a spoiled rich kid but my mom’s folks are loaded. I have a trust fund; college tuition won’t be an issue. So don’t worry about it,” he insisted, moving a bit closer to her. “My parents are pissed but they’ll get over it. Hell, my brother got in a lot more trouble than I did. I’m a saint in comparison. This will all blow over.”
Her relief immense, Rory looked at Carson thoughtfully. “If football isn’t your dream,” she asked, “Then what is?”
“I’m not sure yet. Other than being with you, that is,” he added with a charming wink that made Rory melt. “I meant what I said that night. I like you, Rory…a lot.”
“Why?” she demanded. She knew that wasn’t what she was supposed to say. Every single women’s magazine she’d ever read warned against seeming too needy or insecure. But Rory couldn’t help it. She needed to know what Carson saw in her.
Until he gave her some convincing reasons, she’d always question his sincerity. The last thing she wanted was to be a pity-girlfriend because she’d walked in on something horrifying and he felt bad for her.
Carson looked a bit flustered to be put on the spot, but he nonetheless indulged her. “The way you bite your lower lip just a bit, kind of like you’re doing right now, is adorable. You’re fun. You light up the room. You make people laugh, sometimes even when you don’t mean to. And your laugh is contagious.”
Rory felt her face redden at Carson’s words.
“The way you blush – just like you’re doing right now – is the sweetest thing in the world.”
She turned even redder. “Okay, enough!” she sputtered, feeling flustered and pleased all at once.
“No way,” he shook his head. “You asked so now you have to let me finish. I’m not done yet…not by a long shot. You’re gorgeous and yet you don’t even know it. You’re outgoing and a little on the loud side. But I think underneath it all there’s someone a lot deeper. You’re not like the cheerleaders. You know how to fit in with them but you’re not one of them…not by a long shot. I mean that in the best possible way. And,” he added, “I like the pictures you doodle in your notebook during class. They’re…interesting.”
“How do you even know about those?” Rory demanded. “My desk is behind yours!”
“Yeah, but haven’t you noticed I find every excuse I can to walk past it?” he asked with a grin. “I kept hoping you’d notice me but even those times we hung out in a group it was like you barely even knew I existed so I didn’t think you were interested.”
“I noticed you…I guess I was just shy.”
“I never took you for the shy type.”
“Me neither,” she confessed. “I blame you for bringing it out in me!”
Carson cracked a smile and moved closer, closing the distance between them. He didn’t do it in the typical high school fake yawn sort of way. His method was smooth and natural. One moment he was an arm’s length away from Rory and the next he was right there next to her, so close that she could feel his body heat.
It felt right.
She looked up at him, liking the way he towered over her. It made her feel safe. She reached up and lightly traced a fingertip over his blackened eye, her touch as light as a feather.
“Does it hurt?” she asked softly.
“No.” He caught her wrist in his hand and gently pulled her hand lower. Then with the utmost care, he tenderly kissed her fingertips, nearly causing Rory to swoon right then and there. It was the perfect moment, even better than anything she’d ever dreamed about.
For a moment, Rory forgot to stop breathing. She couldn’t even think straight. When Carson released her hand, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. It was a sweet, unassuming kiss that made her heart race.
It was, for all intents and purposes, the first proper kiss Rory had ever had if she didn’t count a misguided, slobbery attempt from a kid on the playground back in elementary school. At the time she’d remembered wondering what the big deal about kissing was – as far as she was concerned, it was gross! Now she understood that it hadn’t been a real kiss at all.
This…now this was a real kiss.
She didn’t want the kiss to end. She just wanted to stay there in that moment, on that couch next to Carson forever. But of course, eventually they needed to come up for air.
And when the kiss ended, Rory burst into tears.
Carson looked momentarily stunned although to his credit, he recovered quickly. Clearly it wasn’t the post-kiss reaction he’d been hoping for. “Rory?” he asked tentatively, quite obviously unsure of whether he should try to comfort her or back off.
“It’s not you,” she said through a barrage of sobs. “It’s just…maybe it sounds crazy but I keep thinking about all the things Grace will miss out on…”
“Oh, Rory…” The expression on his face was one of pain – pain for Rory and her suffering. He said the words like he wanted to take her in his arms and envelope her in a hug. And a moment later, he did.
All the times Rory had dreamed of being in Carson’s arms – and there had been many – she’d never imagined it to be in a fit of grief. There was nothing romantic or magical about it. It was undignified and sloppy, the way she sobbed on his shoulder. Also, she was pretty sure she got snot on his hoodie.
She broke down utterly and completely, all the grief and guilt and horror she’d bottled up bursting forth as though a dam had broken. She wept for Grace, for Tr
oy, for Rebecca and even for herself. Though she hadn’t wanted to admit it, that moment when she’d found Grace’s lifeless body had changed Rory forever.
One day she’d been a carefree teenager preoccupied with frivolous things – a child, really, with childish aspirations and immature priorities. Then in an instant, that innocence had been ripped away. Growing up, Rory decided, had nothing to do with age at all. Instead, it had to do with experiences.
And with one awful experience, Rory’s childhood had ended.
Carson held Rory tightly as she fell to pieces in his arms. If he was afraid of her emotional breakdown, he didn’t let on. His arms were strong and his embrace was unwavering. Before, Rory would have died at the thought of Carson witnessing her during a display of such extreme weakness.
After was different. And so, Rory didn’t fight what she was feeling.
There was something comforting about crying on Carson’s shoulder. He didn’t try to soothe her or shush her. He simply sat there quietly with his body pressed against Rory’s, his hand lightly stroking her back as her body was wracked with sobs.
He didn’t flinch.
He didn’t falter.
He was just there, waiting patiently for her to work through the dark thoughts and find her way back.
He was just there.
It meant everything.
CHAPTER 14
Being away from Carson was sweet agony. Rory knew she couldn’t afford to skip any more classes so she couldn’t visit him during school hours. One or both of his parents were usually home by the time school let out and they were adamant that Carson wasn’t allowed any visitors for the duration of his grounding.
He sent Rory texts when his parents weren’t looking telling her how much he wished he could be with her. Occasionally he’d tip her off that he was home alone for a couple hours while his parents were out. Rory lived for those texts and for the brief, precious moments they got to spend together.
Catalyst (The Best Days #1) Page 15