“Shut up, Jones.”
“Just checking. I don’t need another reason for Wyatt to want to kick my ass. The list is already long enough.”
“You know, you could always catch a ride with me tomorrow if you want.”
“What? And leave me here all alone to wallow in sorrow? He’s not going anywhere.” Addy stomps her foot as she whines.
“There’s always room for you too. You know that,” I tell Addy for the sixth time today. I’ve been asking her to come with me, but she won’t. Denver isn’t her home, but she’s attached to it. I don’t think anything could convince her to leave it.
Well, maybe not anything, but someone might be able to. They just need to stop tiptoeing around how they feel about each other. If I’ve learned one thing over the last few weeks, it’s that not talking about things won’t lead to answers.
I’ve found my answers, at least enough answers to satisfy the questions I needed answered most.
“I have a feeling if I even try to pack my bag, she’ll tie me up and hold me hostage.” Jones’s eyes light up for a moment before Addy slaps him across the chest. “Just an idea.”
“Not one I plan to entertain. Plus, being a hostage isn’t supposed to be fun.”
“Anything involving you and ropes sounds like fun to me.”
He just doesn’t know when to quit. I make a gagging noise, and they both roll their eyes at me.
“You have no idea how nauseating you and Wyatt used to make me just by looking at each other.”
“What?” I’m genuinely shocked at Jones’s admission. Wyatt and I always tried to play it cool in public. In private was another story.
“Think about it, Chloe. All those times you thought you were being stealthy playing footsie under the table, or when he used to put his hand in your back pocket as the three of us would walk through town. Don’t forget all the times I caught you making out by the pond. I’d be gone less than two minutes to take a leak and come back to find you two looking like you were trying to eat each other’s faces off.”
Addy bursts out in laughter and I can’t help but follow.
“You find that funny? What about the time you didn’t realize that Becky was home and she walked in on you two about to get it on?”
My laughter catches in my throat and turns to a deep cough. I can feel my cheeks heat at the mention of that night. Becky was furious, I was embarrassed, and Wyatt had blue balls for the rest of the night.
It’s been a week since Wyatt and I first made love. We’ve been trying to find time to spend together, alone, but things have been crazy busy. My parents have me helping with the ranch; one of the ranch hands quit without notice a few days ago. Wyatt’s been working his butt off trying to make as much money as he can this summer.
It’s all about timing.
And maybe a little bit about luck.
Wyatt invited me over tonight. His parents are about to leave for dinner with another couple and Willow is working at the bar. We’ll be home alone.
No more tents.
No wondering if I have bugs crawling on me.
There will be a real bed involved. One with sheets to cover myself with and a light that turns off with the flick of a switch.
As soon as his parents are out the door, Wyatt locks it behind them and we race into his room. He made sure to buy condoms after that first night, not wanting to risk being in the situation unprepared.
My shirt comes off before he even kicks his door closed. He follows suit, stripping himself down to just his boxer-briefs as I watch in awe, taking in every inch of his body.
Under the cover of night, I wasn’t able to see his body, to admire how fantastic it really is. You can tell he works hard, that he’s strong. He doesn’t need to remove his shirt to be able to see that, but when he does, for moments like right now, I can’t help but stare at the amazing man in front of me.
Reaching under his bed, he pulls out a box of condoms and slips them into the drawer of his nightstand. Moving to where I’m standing, he slips the strap of my bra off my shoulder and begins peppering kisses down my neck.
Slowly removing the rest of my clothes, Wyatt tucks me under the sheet and turns his light off. When he crawls in next to me, the heat radiating off his body warms my skin.
“I’ve been wanting to do this again for days,” he whispers in my ear. “You’re all I’ve been thinking about. Being with you is like a dream, Chloe. I can’t believe I’m so God damn lucky.”
Turning my head, I kiss him gently on his lips. That innocent kiss turns into so much more as he rolls on top of me, his entire body covering mine. I can feel him grow against my stomach and just as I’m reaching for the condoms in his drawer, the light above us is flicked on, temporarily blinding me.
“Oh my God!” Becky screams, slamming Wyatt’s door closed.
“Shit,” Wyatt mumbles. “I’m so sorry. I have no idea what they’re doing home. They weren’t supposed to be back for hours.”
I have no voice, no words. Becky walked in on the most intimate moment you can have with another person. She saw something that will forever be burned in her mind.
Wyatt quickly dresses and heads to talk to his mom while I stay hidden in his room. She has to know this isn’t our first time. She’s a smart person, an active parent. I’m sure she gave Wyatt the “talk” when we started dating. That seems like her.
Crawling out from under the covers, I put my clothes back on just as the door to Wyatt’s room opens again. Looking up, I’m surprised when it’s not Wyatt’s eyes I’m looking into but his mother’s.
“Let’s talk, Chloe,” she says, closing the door behind her and taking a seat next to me on the bed.
“I’m sorry, Becky.”
“There’s nothing to be sorry about. If I had known, I never would have opened that door, but the fact of the matter is, you guys are going to do what you want to do. You’re both adults, and I just want to make sure you realize that there are consequences of your actions.”
“We’re safe, I promise.” Opening Wyatt’s drawer, I point to the box of condoms hidden inside. “Look. We’re safe.”
“I didn’t need to see that, but thanks. Just know that if you ever need anything, you can come to me. Even if that means talking about things neither of us want to talk about with each other. Okay?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Now, we’re actually leaving this time. Kent was having an issue with the car, but I think he and Wyatt have it figured out now.”
“Okay, have fun,” I say, not really sure what would be an appropriate response in that moment.
“I would say you too, but I’d rather not think about it.”
I could have gone to Becky. She would have helped me. I knew that then; I know that now. She’s always been protective of her children and supportive as well.
“If I apologize for grossing you out when we were kids, do you promise not to gross me out as an adult?” I ask Jones.
“Nope. Can’t do it. Payback is a bitch, baby.”
The room erupts in laughter at Jones’s choice of words. He tries so hard to sound tough, but it always comes out making him sound like a goon. That’s one of the things I love about him. And one of the things I’m going to miss about him when he finally takes the plunge and moves here to be with Addy.
25
Two Weeks
WYATT
As I make Lola pancakes for the second time this week, I smile. She loves my pancakes. More than she loves Carmen’s French toast. Speaking of…
When Carmen was here, things were awkward. We’d only met one other time and I was under extreme duress that night. I’m sure I didn’t make the best first impression. In fact, I’m pretty sure I scared the shit out of her that night.
In a moment of insanity and desperation, I went to Chloe’s house looking for her. Barging through the front door, Carmen was the first person I saw. Holding her by the shoulders, I interrogated her for answers. Answers she didn’t have or would
n’t share.
The Warren’s were gone. They had already taken Chloe to Denver. I didn’t know it at the time and in my panicked state, I didn’t care. All I wanted was to find Chloe.
So, needless to say, coming face to face with Carmen again after all these years didn’t sit well with me. Even after I apologized to her for the way I acted back then.
She cleaned the house from top to bottom. In one day. It looked like a brand-new place when I came home. I think she may even have cleaned the furniture because I don’t remember it being that light of a beige color before.
Aside from the weird looks she would give me, I felt like a guest in my own home. After a few days, I couldn’t handle it anymore. She had to leave. I understood that she loved Lola and that she wanted to help, it was her job after all, but I couldn’t have her here twenty-four hours a day. So she moved back in with the Warren’s.
She comes over a few days a week to look after Lola. Part of the deal was that she wouldn’t clean. She’s not allowed to do anything other than hang out with Lola.
Our agreement is still a work in progress. Last night when I got home, there was a pot roast in the oven. The day before, all the laundry had been washed and folded. I’m pretty sure she cleaned the outside of the kitchen cabinets at some point, and I know she organized the pantry. I couldn’t find anything this morning.
For the simple fact that I was exhausted after working every day and trying to keep up with Lola every night, I let it go. I have no idea how Chloe could have survived without help from Carmen. Especially in the beginning when Lola was small. I’m sure things were even more hectic then, with Chloe taking classes and needing time to study.
Thinking about Carmen makes me think about Chloe. When I think about her, it makes me think about all the things she’s had do without me, without help, which makes me sad. Especially knowing it wasn’t a choice for her.
Tonight, when we get home, Lola leaves. I’m struggling with it emotionally. I don’t want her to go. I’d give anything for Chloe to realize that we belong together, the three of us.
Not just because we are a family, but because I still love her.
I’ve always loved her and always will. Her and Lola.
There were moments over the last few weeks, when we’ve been talking on the phone, that I got the feeling she felt the same about me. It’s the little things she says, that moment before we hang up where it feels like she wants to say more. I know there’s a lot more I want to say in those fleeting moments of silence.
Moments that have kept me up for hours at night as I replayed them in my mind.
What could I have said differently?
What will it take to make her see the truth?
Does she still love me or is everything she’s doing, the time she’s given me with Lola, all to make up for what happened?
The only person who holds those answers is Chloe. She’ll be here in ten hours, and I plan on asking her. I need answers. I deserve them. No matter what she says, at least I’ll know.
Calling Lola down for breakfast, I don’t get an immediate response. Turning off the burner, I head to find out where she is and, more importantly, why she’s so quiet.
As I pass the guest room and head up the stairs, I hear her talking to herself.
“Don’t worry, Teddy. I won’t be gone long. Momma and Daddy still love each other. That means that one day we’ll live together, all of us.”
Stopping at the top of the stairs, I watch her in her room for a few minutes. She’s arranging all the stuffed animals we’ve acquired while she’s been here on her bed. Her very bright-pink bed.
In her very bright-pink room.
I tried to talk her into a softer color. That didn’t work. She’s stubborn like her mother. And smart. And strong.
So very strong.
Chloe has been an amazing role model for Lola. Instead of letting our unplanned pregnancy stop her from getting her degree and making a life for herself, she persevered. Head held high, she took life as it was thrown at her and kept moving forward.
I only wish I had been as strong as her when life came crashing down around us.
Looking down at the time again, I keep pacing back and forth. Chloe needs to hurry up or I won’t be able to do it before I have to leave for work.
ME: Where are you? I thought you were going to meet me this morning. I’m getting worried.
She promised she would be here.
There’s a well-worn path beneath my feet by the time I finally give up and decide to leave for work. Digging through my pockets, I pull out the first piece of paper I find and write her a note, leaving it on the bench where I’m sure she’ll find it.
One final glance back before I disappear into the tree line and there’s still no sign of Chloe. Something has to be wrong. She would never stand me up. It’s not like her.
Racing to work, Willy calls me into his office as soon as I cross the threshold.
“Sorry I’m late,” I say, my breathing still ragged from my run.
“Do you have a good excuse?” he asks, never looking up from the paperwork in front of him. His desk is always covered in stacks of paperwork but today, there is twice as much as normal and he’s twice as irritated.
“I was supposed to meet Chloe this morning, but she didn’t show. I lost track of time waiting,” I lie.
“I need you to help Eddie with a few things this morning. I’ll be in here most of the day, so you’ll also have to take any runs we need to make.”
I hate being the one stuck going out all the time, but it seems like a bad time to discuss that with Willy. I want to stay in the garage more and learn as much as I can about mechanics. Going on runs takes away my time to learn.
“Sure thing,” I reply. “Is everything okay?”
“Depends on your definition of okay,” he says dryly. “Get to work, Wyatt. Eddie’s waiting.”
Closing his office door behind me, I drop my things in the back room and go in search of Eddie. My phone chimes a few hours later from across the room but I’m in the middle of replacing a tire and can’t stop to check it.
It’s probably Chloe, letting me know what’s up.
I’ll have to give her shit later for making me late.
There’s only one other time she’s stood me up, and that was out of her control. Her parents decided to hold her captive, forcing her to attend some fancy dinner party with them. At least she sent me a text, though. This time she didn’t even do that.
Did she forget?
That doesn’t seem like her either. She the one always reminding me about plans we make.
Maybe her parents held her up. She said that the only time she really sees them is at breakfast and dinner. They always eat together as a family. I get it, that’s really nice and all, but how long does it take to eat a piece of toast and some eggs?
Not long enough to make me wait thirty minutes.
There has to be something else going on.
As I pull the garage doors closed for the night, my back begins to ache and I feel like I’m about to fall asleep on my feet. We had more work than two people should have been able to handle today, but we got it all done.
Grabbing my phone, I slide my finger across the screen to see ten missed texts from Jones.
JONES: Call me.
JONES: Seriously, we need to talk.
JONES: Where are you?
JONES: Your mom said you’re at work. Meet me at the bar after you get out of work.
JONES: I’m here. You on our way?
JONES: I’m getting worried, bro.
JONES: I know you love her but it can’t be that bad. Call me.
JONES: Still waiting. I’m about to head down there.
JONES: Last chance. Call me or I’m coming to find you.
JONES: On my way.
What is his deal? Why is he freaking out? What can’t be that bad? Is he talking about Chloe?
The bell above the door chimes. Turning to let them know we’re closed
, I’m drawn into Jones’s arms.
“I’m so sorry, man.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Sorry about what?” I ask, pushing him away.
“Chloe,” he says, his head tilting in confusion.
“What about her? Is she okay?” My heart begins to ache inside my chest at the thought that something bad has happened to Chloe.
“Have you been here all day?”
“Yeah. I was supposed to meet Chloe this morning, but she never showed. Have you seen her?”
Jones takes a step back, and then another. Once he’s out of reach, he takes a deep breath and tells me everything he knows.
Jumping into his car, we race to Chloe’s house only to find it dark. I beat on the door for ten minutes before opening the door and coming face to face with a young Hispanic woman.
“Can I help you?”
“Where’s Chloe?” I demand, grabbing on to her shoulders.
“She’s not here. She has left for school.”
“No. She has two weeks still. When did she leave?”
“Mr. and Mrs. Warren took her this afternoon.”
“What? Why? This can’t be happening. Where is she!” I scream.
Her shoulders begin to shake beneath my hands. Releasing her, I walk through the open door. When I turn to apologize, she closes the door in my face and I hear the deadbolt slide into place.
Chloe’s gone. She left me without saying goodbye.
“This isn’t right,” I profess.
“I’m sorry, man. I thought you knew. I figured that’s why you weren’t answering me.”
“No. I left her a note this morning to call me when she didn’t show up. I bet she didn’t even bother to go down to the pond.”
“I’m sure she tried.”
“Well, she should have tried harder. Let’s go,” I demand, descending the steps.
Jones drives up to the pond, a bottle of rum hidden in his trunk. As soon as we clear the tree line, I walk over to where I left Chloe the note. Reaching for the paper, I almost crumple it up when I see her handwriting.
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