by Deborah Hale
His long face glowed with joy. Yet Jasper detected a faint ripple of anxiety in his friend’s eyes. Was he wondering how he would support a sister and a wife on his modest living, not to mention provide for children if they were so blessed?
“Congratulations, my friend!” Jasper swept toward the newly engaged pair. “I insist Mrs. Dawson stay at Amberwood as my guest until you are able to arrange the wedding.”
“Thank you, sir.” Verity Dawson looked astonished to be treated with such civility. “That is very kind of you indeed. I hope we have not spoiled your party by causing Miss Anstruther to leave.”
Jasper shook his head. “I doubt her going will cast a pall over the festivities. Quite the opposite, I should think. Besides, it was I who provoked her to leave, not you.”
Evangeline stepped forward to offer her congratulations. Then she said, “If you will excuse me, I must go check that the children have not sickened themselves on sweets.”
“We should rejoin the party as well,” said Norton. “I want to share our happy news with Abigail. I am certain she will be delighted for us.”
Seeing them so happy together made Jasper anxious to recapture similar joy... but not with Margaret Webster.
He offered Evangeline his arm. “Miss Fairfax, may I escort you back to the fair?”
“Thank you, sir.” She slipped one slender hand through the crook of his elbow to rest lightly on his forearm. “It was good of you not to sack me after the way I spoke to Miss Anstruther. It was not my place to lecture one of your guests.”
“I hope you did not believe there was any danger of that!” Jasper found it difficult to muster a coherent reply because so much of his awareness was concentrated on the touch of her hand. It filled him with a strange sweet lightness, like the froth on a mug of fresh cider. “As for your place, it is always the place of a true lady to speak in defense of those who are being ill-treated. I thought you were quite magnificent.”
Her face lit up in a smile so radiant it made him long to... do something very foolish indeed. “You acquitted yourself well, too. If she had not behaved so badly, I might feel sorry for Miss Anstruther.”
“Let us hope she will heed some of what was said to her and mend her ways. I fear Mrs. Thorpe may be vexed with me for making her goddaughter leave the party.”
Evangeline chuckled. “If your mother-in-law scolds you, I promise I will come to your defense.”
“Will you?” Imagining the scene made Jasper grin from ear to ear. “Then I reckon I have nothing to worry about.”
They strolled back to rejoin the crowd still enjoying a fine summer day’s entertainment. From the audience thronged around the puppet show, Margaret Webster waved to them.
Evangeline tensed and released Jasper’s arm. “You should join Miss Webster and the girls. I must go find out what Matthew and Alfie are up to.”
Before he could protest, she disappeared into the crowd, leaving his arm with a faint ache that he fancied only her touch could relieve.
Chapter Twelve
JASPER CHASE HAD offered her his arm and told her she was magnificent for standing up to Miss Anstruther. The memory made Evangeline break into a furtive smile every time she recalled it that evening. Through the night, she relived that moment in her dreams.
Reason warned her that such a trivial incident should not mean so much to her. She tried to banish it from her thoughts with the familiar litany that Jasper did not want a wife like her and she did not want a husband of any kind.
But those convictions seemed to have lost their protective power. In their place came new ideas that intrigued and unsettled her. For instance, how pleasant it had felt to have someone she could rely on to come to her aid. Though Jasper claimed to want a compliant wife, she was not certain he truly did. There had been nothing compliant about the way she’d confronted Miss Anstruther. Yet he had not rebuked her for it. If anything, he seemed to respect her more.
If she had required any further proof that he did not hold her actions against her, Jasper appeared in the nursery as usual the next morning, looking altogether too handsome.
“Drink your coffee quickly.” He poured himself a cup and took a deep draft. “I have asked Jane to keep an eye on the children while we take a walk.”
Evangeline strove to moderate her reaction to his words, but she could not keep her heart from bounding. “Do we have a sensitive subject to discuss?”
Jasper nodded. “About Norton and Mrs. Dawson. I thought you would want to know.”
“Indeed I do.” Evangeline was delighted with the match between Verity and Mr. Brookes, who reminded her of her soft-spoken, scholarly father. “I hope they can find a way to live in some comfort without having to marry off his sister, when she would prefer to earn her own living.”
Jasper’s head snapped up. “She would? How do you know that?”
“She told me so.” Evangeline drained her cup and rose to her feet. “Miss Brookes would like to work as a governess, but her brother will not hear of it. Something to do with their mother.”
Jane appeared just then. Though she tried to look as if it was a common occurrence for her employer and the governess to take early-morning strolls together, Evangeline wondered if the nursery maid had commented about it below stairs.
“I will fetch my bonnet.” Evangeline hurried off before Jane noticed the color in her cheeks and guessed more about her feelings than she could bear.
She returned as soon as she had tied on her bonnet... and her blush had faded. She knew it was not right for her to feel so elated about going off with Jasper on her own. She was trying to make a match between him and another woman after all. Indeed, she had no business thinking of him by his Christian name. She was not certain when it had begun, only that she could not seem to stop herself now.
The countryside was swathed in mist when they emerged from the house, but the sky had a pearly glow that promised the haze would soon burn off.
Evangeline was grateful for the veil of mist that wrapped around her and Jasper, hiding them from curious eyes. It created an appealing illusion that they were in their own private world without obligations, plans or expectations.
“Did Miss Anstruther’s departure make the atmosphere at dinner very awkward last night?” She hoped not. In spite of Jasper’s insistence to the contrary, she felt responsible for provoking the unpleasant breach of his house party.
“My mother-in-law was rather dismayed.” He did not sound troubled by Mrs. Thorpe’s reaction. “But the rest of the party seemed happier for her absence. Norton and Mrs. Dawson announced their engagement, which put everyone in good spirits.”
“Even his sister?”
“Especially his sister. She likes Mrs. Dawson and after what you have told me, she may assume her brother will be forced to let her earn her own living now. I wonder...” Jasper’s voice trailed off.
“You wonder...?” Evangeline prompted him.
“Whether Abigail might consider filling your position at Amberwood,” he continued in a bemused tone. “The children like her and Norton might be less resistant to her becoming a governess if it would help us out.”
That did sound like a reasonable solution for everyone. Yet more than ever it troubled Evangeline to think of someone else taking her place at Amberwood—even someone as agreeable as Abigail Brookes. Could she command the respect a governess needed, after having been more of a playmate to the children?
Another idea occurred to her. “Perhaps Miss Brookes could come and teach at my school. Her brother might mind that less than having her become a private governess. It would benefit our pupils to have a teacher with her high spirits. My friends had wanted Leah Shaw to help me run the school, for precisely that reason. But then Leah married the duke.”
“Leah?” Jasper repeated the name in a puzzled tone. “Wasn’t she also one of your friends at the charity school who became a governess?”
“We all did,” she replied. “Teaching is one of the few respectable means for
a woman to earn her own living, however modest.”
Her answer did nothing to dispel Jasper’s puzzled look. “A charity pupil turned governess married to a duke?”
Evangeline nodded. “You may be amazed that Leah wed so well, but I am more surprised that she wed at all. I thought she valued her independence too much to be tied down that way. But she sounds happy in her letters. So do the others, though that surprises me less. Rebecca, Grace and Hannah were all well suited to marriage. I never expected they would make such advantageous matches, but I am delighted for them.”
She pressed her lips closed to prevent a further rush of words. She had not meant to go on at such length.
But Jasper did not appear to mind. Indeed, he seemed to be listening most intently. When she paused, he did not seize the opportunity to turn the conversation back to Verity and Mr. Brookes. Instead, he asked, “Do you ever envy your friends the happiness they have found?”
“Never,” she insisted. “My friends deserve all the security, comfort and happiness it is possible for women to be blessed with.”
“Perhaps envy is the wrong word.” Jasper’s steps slowed as he searched for the right one. “What I meant to say was, do you never wish you could experience that sort of happiness for yourself? A home of your own, the love of a husband and children?”
Did she dare answer his question honestly? Evangeline feared not. More and more of late, she had begun to yearn for precisely those things—the love of a husband, especially. But not just any husband. Were such feelings a test to prove she was worthy to do take up her intended vocation?
How could she think of letting down her friends who were depending on her and the orphan girls who needed her? Not to mention her late mother, who’d been so certain she was destined for some important task in life?
“I told you, my friends were well suited to marriage.” She chose her words with care so she could speak the truth without betraying her feelings. “I am not and never have been envious of their marriages. I was meant for a different role.”
“But not meant to be happy?” he asked in a tone of wistful pity that rasped against her pride. “I cannot believe that is how your life is meant to be.”
“Who says I will not be happy?” Evangeline bristled, though she feared it might be true. Now that her feelings for Jasper Chase had been roused, could she ever be truly happy if she were parted from him and the children? But his probing questions compelled her to deny it. “I expect to be very happy doing such valuable work and making a difference in the lives of so many children. I expect to be happy fulfilling the purpose for which I have been preparing all this time.”
She cast a fleeting glance at Jasper as he walked by her side, not certain she was persuading either of them.
She made one final effort. “Do you think it would make me happier to give up all my hopes and plans to subject myself to the will of a husband? We would be at odds all the time. You told me yourself that can only lead to unhappiness.”
As they walked, the hem of her skirts grew increasingly damp from the wet grass, until she fancied it weighing her down.
She expected Jasper to contradict her. That would prove she was right that they would be in constant conflict. Yet some traitorous part of her wanted him to persuade her that marriage could bring her happiness rather than regret.
But Jasper did not reply. Perhaps he realized she was right.
“Why are we wasting time talking about me?” she demanded. “You wanted to tell me something about Verity and Mr. Brookes. Was it only that they announced their engagement?”
Jasper came to a halt and stared at her until she met his eye. “Talking about you is never a waste of time.”
As they stood there in the mist, Evangeline felt the weight of unspoken words settling over them. She clamped her lips shut to keep from breaking their silence.
Just when she feared she would betray herself, Jasper turned and began walking back the way they had come. “There was something more I wanted to tell you about our friends. I invited Norton to help me with my work at New Hope Mills. He can preach to my workers and assist me in tending to their welfare. Perhaps he could take a few of the brighter boys to teach, the way Parson Ward did.”
“Only the boys?” Evangeline muttered.
Jasper might not have heard her, or perhaps he did not want to start another argument between them. “I cannot pay Norton a large salary, but more than the living from his current parish. He seems eager to be involved.”
Her happiness for Verity and Mr. Brookes soothed Evangeline’s wrought-up emotions. “I am certain the vicar will be a great help to you.”
“I expect so,” Jasper replied. “What I did not expect was the renewed enthusiasm I feel for my work at the mill, knowing I will have his support. I only wish I had thought to ask him sooner.”
Though she knew such a collaboration would benefit Mr. Brookes, Jasper and especially his employees at New Hope Mills, the thought of it gave Evangeline a wistful pang. She wished it had been possible for her and Leah Shaw to run the new charity school together, the way their friends had hoped. No doubt the two of them would have disagreed on occasion, in a way Jasper clearly abhorred. But they would have supported one another all the same, as they had during their younger years. Even their disputes might have resulted in valuable compromise, to the benefit of their pupils.
“Why did you bring me out here to tell me that?” Evangeline nodded toward the house, the shape of which grew clearer with each step they took. “It is not a subject that should trouble the children if they happened to overhear. They like Mr. Brookes and Verity and their engagement is a happy event.”
Jasper pondered his reply a good deal longer than he should have needed to. “I did not want them to hear me talking about the mill and start pestering me to take them to Manchester.”
His explanation was perfectly reasonable, yet Evangeline sensed it might not be altogether true.
Of course, he had not wanted his children getting any more troublesome ideas about moving down to Manchester. So Jasper insisted to himself as he and Evangeline returned to the house. But that was not the chief reason he had invited her for an early-morning stroll. Now that he had become aware of the true nature of his feelings for the lady, he wanted to spend time alone with her, without fear of being overheard or interrupted.
He had secretly hoped that telling her of his friend’s engagement might provide an opportunity to speak of his feelings and inquire about hers. But when the subject of marriage came up, Evangeline’s emphatic declaration was not at all what he’d hoped for. She’d insisted she would never marry, least of all an overbearing man like him.
She had not referred to him by name, of course. But when she spoke of having to subject herself to the will of a husband, he knew who she meant. Had she sensed his altered feelings toward her and tried to discourage him? If so, she did not know his character as well as she often seemed to. He had not risen to be master of his own mill by being easily discouraged from going after what he wanted.
And he wanted Evangeline Fairfax to be his wife—he grew more certain of the fact with every passing hour.
Watching her with his children as they ate breakfast together, he could see the special way she interacted with each of them. He sensed how much they meant to her and how hard it would be for her to leave them. So why should she have to?
Her friends had all found happiness with families of their own. Why did they not encourage Evangeline to do likewise, after all she had done for them? No matter how valuable each of their contributions to the group might have been, Evangeline was the one who had brought them together and made them a group. Had they appreciated her leadership, as she deserved, or had they secretly resented it? Might that be why they wanted her to operate the school endowed by their husbands—so she would be obliged to take orders from them?
Rosie roused her father from his brooding by scrambling onto his lap and flinging her arms around his neck.
Much a
s her actions surprised Jasper, her words did even more. “Have we done something wrong, Papa? If we did, we’re very sorry.”
He wrapped his daughter in a reassuring embrace. “You’ve done nothing wrong at all. What put such a notion in your head?”
He cast a swift glance around the table at Rosie’s brothers and sister to find them all staring at him with anxious expressions.
“You did look angry about something just now, Papa,” Owen informed him in a solemn tone.
“Did I?” Jasper knew it must be true. When he recalled his thoughts about Evangeline’s friends, his features began to tense. He struggled to raise a smile instead. “If I did, you may be certain none of you was responsible.”
He sensed the children would only believe him if he offered another explanation. “I was thinking about something unfair—a person who deserves much more from life than they are getting, a person whose friends may have imposed on them. It made me quite indignant on their behalf. I am sorry if I troubled you.”
Jasper did not dare glance at Evangeline in case she guessed he was referring to her.
Emma had other ideas. “You mean, Mrs. Dawson, don’t you, Papa? Miss Anstruther was supposed to be her friend but she did not treat her very well.”
The other children nodded. Jasper had not realized they were aware of such subtleties in the behavior of his guests. Then again, Penelope Anstruther had not been particularly subtle.
Before he could decide how to answer, Matthew piped up. “You sent her away, didn’t you, Papa, because she was so disagreeable to Mrs. Dawson?”
Jasper answered in a gentle but decisive tone. “I did not send Miss Anstruther away. The decision to leave was hers, though I cannot claim I am sorry to see her go. People who put upon others do not endear themselves to anyone. We would all do well to bear that in mind.”
The children digested his advice with looks as solemn as Owen’s. It made Jasper determined to raise their spirits. “I have some good news to share. Mr. Brookes and Mrs. Dawson have gotten engaged. That means they will be getting married quite soon.”