“Olivia!’ Ethan’s voice sounded strained, as if he was fighting very hard just to speak. “You have to go. Get out of here now!”
I looked at him and he met my gaze, his expression tense.
“I want her to agree to this of her own free will,” the queen said. “This doesn’t have to be painful. Because she’s revenant, I don’t have to use violence to make this transition.” Her gaze moved to me. “You straddle the line between life and death every moment, every day. No more blood needs to be spilled. No trauma. I can take your shell right now.”
“You’re saying you want me to agree to this.” I choked out. “Just stand here and let you take over my body?”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m asking for.”
“Forget it.”
“If I cause him great pain—” She cast a look at Ethan, “—he won’t be able to fight. I told you I can wrench the wraith right from his shell. Let me show you.”
Her attention moved to Ethan again and his teeth gritted together.
“No,” he growled and he fell forward onto his hands. “No! Don’t listen to her, Olivia. Don’t—” A strangled roar of pain escaped from him before he went silent.
The smoke I’d seen rise from Ethan’s skin was different this time. It was darker. His face was a mask of agony, but he didn’t cry out again. Sweat ran down his face, slicking his dark hair to his forehead.
She was doing exactly what she’d said. She was pulling the Upyri wraith out of Ethan’s body.
“Stop!” The word erupted from me. “Stop it! Please. Stop hurting him!”
She glanced at me. “Are you going to be a good girl and do what I say?”
“Yes!”
“No, Olivia...don’t do this...” Ethan’s words were muffled, pained, his brows drawn together.
“There’s no other way. She’ll get what she wants no matter what. I don’t want you to die, too.”
“But I wouldn’t really be gone forever. I’d find another shell.”
I shook my head. “You’re wrong. Ethan would be gone forever. And I won’t let that happen. Not again.”
“Olivia—no. Don’t do this.”
I turned to my mother. “So now what?”
She eyed me warily as if expecting me to renege at any moment. “You do love him, don’t you? Despite what he really is?”
“Now what?” I snapped.
“This old body impedes me. I need to shed it. And when I do, don’t move, don’t breathe. Close your eyes if it helps. It will all be over in a moment, I promise. And then there will be no more pain. No more worry. No more disappointment, only peace.”
She held her hands out to either side of herself and closed her eyes. A moment later a wave of fire rapidly swept over her. Before I could breathe, scream, or even register the absolute horror of what I was seeing, her shell burned up right before my eyes. It became a column of flame that I needed to shield my face against or I thought I might go blind.
The fire disappeared and there was now a scorch mark on the grass where she’d previously stood.
She was gone.
My legs gave out and I collapsed to the ground.
I had to focus. It was so important. Even now that it all seemed utterly hopeless, I had no choice but to focus or everything really would be lost.
I was revenant.
Damn it, that meant something. I’d died once, but I was still alive. I had a power inside of me that I’d never known I had before. A power that was created at the same time that I received the scar on my leg—the one I hid from the world because I didn’t want to be judged for something I saw as a flaw, an imperfection, something ugly and repulsive.
But that scar represented the only thing that could save me right now.
That could save myself and Ethan.
And also save the kids at school.
So I focused with every last piece of my body and soul.
I’d already known what to look for after seeing the darkness rising from Ethan. A shadow, a moving shadow. It was hard to spot here in the wooded area we were in, but it was there. It was like I was wearing those night goggles that help people see in the dark. I knew what I was looking for, I believed that I could see it...
And there it was.
I took a deep breath. “Do you know how much I hated her for leaving us? So much I could barely see straight. But she’d already left us long before she took off to Hawaii and didn’t look back. I grieved her all this time. I’d made my peace with the fact that I’d never see her again. You tell me she only came back to get her stupid jewelry since it was the only thing she valued in that house. Well, I’d already looked through her jewelry and I’d taken something that I’ve worn ever since—a memory of the mother I mourned, the part of her I still loved.”
I wrenched the locket I always wore from around my neck, breaking the chain.
“Olivia, what are you doing?” Ethan said.
I held my left hand up to stop him from coming any closer to me. I didn’t risk even looking in his direction. My entire focus was on the shadow edging ever closer to me.
“I kept wondering how to tap into this revenant power—this death magic I have inside of myself. I thought it would feel different. But I don’t feel any different. I can only think that means there is no hocus pocus I need to do right now. No Latin phrases I need to recite. That what I am, who I am, is enough. All I need is me...and a silver container.”
The shadowy wraith stopped moving.
I flicked open the locket. Inside was a picture of me when I was just a little kid on one side and a picture of me, my mother and my father on the other. Of all my mother’s jewelry, which included a couple of beautiful diamond rings, this was the only piece I’d taken.
It was something that had memories attached to it. My own echoes—both good and bad. That’s all the past was, really. Memories. Pieces of your heart. Echoes.
And I’d use those echoes to defeat this monster.
The shadow began to retreat backward, but it wasn’t doing a very good job. I held the locket on the palm of my hand, outward toward it.
Flypaper—it was sticky flypaper.
And I wanted to trap a fly. Forever.
Maybe if a normal person held this locket in their hand it wouldn’t work, not the way I wanted it to, anyway.
But I wasn’t normal. I was revenant. I had died, but I was still alive.
My scar proved that. It wasn’t ugly—it was the visible proof that I was a survivor. Proof that I was very special. And very dangerous.
Exactly why the queen wanted my shell in the first place. She should have been careful what she wished for.
In wraith form, the queen didn’t have a voice. If she did, I was sure she would be screaming by now.
It only took a few more moments before the shadow lifted off the ground and flew toward the locket in a thin, opaque line of darkness. When it had disappeared, I snapped the locket shut.
Ethan approached me, slowly and cautiously. I think I was smiling when I turned to look at him. His face, however, didn’t hold the same victory in it. He looked concerned. For me.
My smile faded immediately.
“I’m so sorry about your mother, Olivia.”
I was sorry too. So sorry I couldn’t put it into words or even thoughts.
I glanced at the locket. “Will this be enough to hold her?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
Frank groaned as he began to come to. He sat up from where he’d collapsed a dozen feet away and looked at the knife sticking out of his chest. “Damn.”
Ethan looked at him. “You okay?”
“Gimme a sec.” He grabbed the hilt and pulled the blade out, swearing loudly as he did it. “She almost got my heart.”
“Almost.” Ethan shook his head. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me anything about this.”
He shrugged, and then grimaced as if it hurt him. “Secrets are best kept between only one person and himself. Any more and things co
uld go very wrong.”
“You knew from the beginning it was my mother, didn’t you?” I asked quietly.
“Yeah. Sorry about that, kid. But I already knew she wasn’t gonna go for your shell until tonight. When she found me, I managed to convince her that tonight was full of magic and waiting would make her more powerful.”
“Was that a lie?” Ethan asked.
“Mostly. Anyway, I thought Olivia was safe—relatively speaking—until now. Do you hate me?”
I inhaled shakily. “No. I don’t hate you.”
He looked at Ethan.
“I haven’t decided yet,” Ethan replied, his arms crossed. “I’ll get back to you.”
“I wanted to tell you. Both of you. But...” he shrugged, “the greater good and all that.”
I frowned. “But this keeps the rest of the Upyri trapped. And the queen, she wanted the others to have a chance to live. You’re okay with stopping that? Stopping more of your kind from escaping this prison?”
“I didn’t approve of her plans.” He sighed. “Damn Frank Kaplan and his vampire hunting morals. The queen didn’t want to live benevolently side by side with humans. She wanted too much. She got greedy. And she had to be dealt with so disaster could be averted. I couldn’t have the deaths of a hundred kids on my conscience.”
I looked at the silver box with shock. “There are a hundred Upyri in there?”
“Give or take.” He pulled a pair of gloves out of his pocket. “Now I gotta take all this silver somewhere. Bury it deep so no one finds it. There’s a new development going in on the west side of town. I’m thinking a concrete foundation might be a good hiding spot.” He put the gloves on and picked up the box, then nodded at the locket in my hand. “Will you trust me enough to get rid of that for you?”
I studied his face for a moment. He did look much better, more respectable with a shave and a haircut. The suit was a bit wrinkled, now that I took a good look at it. But I was right. He was younger than I’d thought at first glance the other day when I’d met him. At the moment, he didn’t look much older than my father.
I placed the locket on top of the silver box. “I trust you.”
“Glad to hear it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go bury some Upyri. I have the other two stuck in a silver flask at my place. Too bad. I really liked that flask. Anyway, if you need me, you can find me at the McGavin. After tonight, I definitely need a drink.”
Ethan shook his head as he watched Frank walk away. “Had no idea he’d been meeting with the queen behind my back.”
“You’ve been busy lately.”
“Yeah.” He turned to face me and he looked as tense as he had before. “Look. Olivia, I’m—”
“Please don’t say you’re sorry again. Just don’t.”
He met my eyes. “Then what am I supposed to say? She was going to end me and you stopped her. I thought you were going to sacrifice yourself for me and...I don’t think I could have dealt with that.”
I shrugged. “It was a trick.”
“I see that now. I just didn’t think you would...”
“What?”
He glanced off toward the car that was still parked, keys in ignition, twenty feet away. The trees were so thick here that I couldn’t see out to the main road. “You said that thing about Ethan...not being able to save him...”
I drew in a shaky breath. “I’m sorry I never saw you. I’m sorry I ignored you all those years.”
His expression remained grim. “That was the real Ethan, not me.”
I shook my head. “It was you. You’re Ethan. Everything he was, every memory he had. We’re made from memories. They shape us, everything we do, everything we are is shaped by what’s happened to us in the past.”
His expression tensed. “You don’t have to say that. It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Yes, it does. It matters more than anything.”
“It’s the past. Maybe it should stay there.” He turned away from me, but I grabbed his hand and he froze in place.
My throat hurt. “Did you mean it?”
“What?”
“What you said to me at the warehouse. When you said that you were...” I swallowed hard. “Was that the truth?”
He looked pained, but after a moment he nodded. “Yes. But I totally understand if you—”
I pulled him toward me by the lapels of his jacket and kissed him. I kissed him deeply, so deeply, until he finally kissed me back.
When the kiss broke off he touched his fingertips to his lips as if he couldn’t believe what I’d just done. “Liv—”
I smiled at him even though it was shaky. “I see you now. I see everything. And it’s—it’s crazy and mixed up and scary as hell. But...Ethan, I—I love you, too. Madly, passionately, desperately.”
He looked stunned. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
“I know exactly what I’m saying.”
“But I’m an Upyr.”
“I know.”
“I need to drink blood once a day or I’ll burn up. I can make people forget things—not you, but other people. You said it yourself, I’m a monster.”
I shook my head. “You’re not a monster. You’re Ethan. And that’s enough to make me okay with your scars.”
“My scars?”
I nodded. “The things you’re ashamed of, that you don’t want other people to see. I’ve seen your scars and they don’t matter to me anymore. It doesn’t do a thing to change how I feel about you.”
His tense expression finally relaxed as what I was saying began to register for him. I wasn’t messing with him. I wasn’t going to lead him along and then embarrass him in front of the popular kids at a school dance.
“Olivia...” As he said my name a slow smile played at his lips. “You have no idea how happy I am to hear that.”
“If you were that happy you’d be kissing me by now.”
“Good point.” And he did kiss me, very hard and very deep. And despite all the pain and fear and grief I’d experienced tonight, happiness filled me. Warmed me and made me know that everything was going to be okay in the end.
And I had believed everything I said. He was Ethan Cole, fully and completely. And I was madly, passionately, desperately in love with him.
Chapter 22
Bree was pacing the parking lot when we drove back in the car Frank left for us.
“Where did you go with your mom at a time like this?” she demanded. “What the hell, Olivia?”
I cringed at the reminder of my mother. Then I quickly filled Bree in on what she’d missed. Her eyes grew so wide by the end of it that I thought they’d literally drop out of her head and roll away down the street.
Instead of saying anything, she grabbed me in a fierce hug that took my breath away and almost made me laugh. Bree wasn’t really the hugging type.
“I’m so sorry,” she said.
I hugged her back before she finally let go of me. “Thanks.”
“I knew my great-great-grandfather wouldn’t betray you guys.”
“We’ll have to introduce you soon.”
“Awesome. More relatives in town to try to stop me in case I decide to get another tattoo.” She glanced at Ethan who was standing stiffly next to me. “And then there’s you.”
He eyed her cautiously. “Yes?”
She let go of me and walked a slow circle around him as if assessing his worth. “So what are we going to do about you?”
“Good question,” he replied.
“Are you still leaving? Liv said you wanted to take off as soon as everything worked out. And it looks like it worked out.”
He blinked. “I did say that, didn’t I?”
I realized I was holding my breath, waiting for his response. Just because I’d told him how I felt didn’t mean that anything had changed.
“Well?” I prompted after a moment. I had to know one way or the other.
“Am I leaving?” he repeated. “Maybe someday but not anytime soon. I think I
definitely want the chance to finish school and graduate. That’s another year from now.”
“That’s why you’re staying?” Bree asked skeptically. “Because of school?”
“Yeah, school.” Ethan was speaking to her, but didn’t move his gaze away from mine. He drew closer to me and reached down take my hand in his, entwining our fingers. “What other reason could there be?”
“Right.” Bree snorted. “He’s all yours, Liv.”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Glad we agree on something.”
o0o
The three of us didn’t stick around prom any longer. I didn’t need more confrontations with either Peter or Helen. I wished both of them well. I did. But after everything that had happened, the last thing I felt like doing was dancing or socializing. Ethan drove both of us home, dropping Bree off first.
“See you Monday?” she asked me.
“Definitely.”
She nodded, smiled, and walked away. So that was it. We were officially friends again. We could try to forget about the last four years. Or, even better, we could accept what had happened and start making new memories.
That sounded good to me.
Ethan drove into my driveway and we were quiet for a moment.
“Get some sleep,” he said. “It’s been a rough night. A rough week.”
“It has.”
He frowned, looking at the steering wheel. Then he glanced at me. “You’re sure that—”
I leaned toward him and brushed my lips against his. “Yes, I’m sure.”
A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Well...good.”
“Can you do something for me?”
“Anything. What?”
“Pick me up tomorrow at noon.”
“Why?”
“We’re going to the mall.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Nearly dying one night, only surviving by the skin of our teeth, and you want to go shopping the very next day?”
“Pretty much.” I slid my fingers through his long bangs, pushing them to the side so I could see his beautiful copper-colored eyes underneath. “I have something I want to buy there and I’ll definitely need your opinion on it.”
“What?”
“It’s a surprise.”
He nodded. “I’ll be here at noon. Promise.”
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