by Gina Whitney
I blushed. No one in my entire life had ever given me a sincere compliment. Sure, I have been told that I was pretty, beautiful even. But Cam’s remark was not given to sway me into giving up parts of my integrity or soul. He was looking past my physicality and caught a glimpse of something more important. His admiration was given honestly and purely without any expectation of payback. I picked up a croissant and took a piece of it into my mouth. He smiled and clicked my croissant with the remainder of his palmier like we were clinking wine glasses.
After I poured both of us some coffee, Cam started probing me. “So what made you become a model anyway?” he asked, taking another bite of his palmier.
I took a sip of coffee, giving myself time to think about an answer that would make me look good. However, I felt so relaxed by Cam’s presence, I felt like telling the truth.
“Why modeling?” I said. “Well, I wasn’t the brainiest, funniest, or most innovative in school. The one thing that I did receive praise for was my looks. So you have to exploit your best asset. My assets were my face and body. I meet a lot of people through my looks; that is how I survived. That’s how I’m surviving now.”
Cam pointed at my gourmet kitchen like it was nothing more than a ratted-out closet with a hotplate. “This is surviving? You live in a freak show. Sure, the tent is beautiful, but it is still a spectacle. I’m sorry to tell you, but you are not surviving. You are dying a slow death.”
With those insightful words, Cam cut me to the quick. He said what I already knew but did not want to fully acknowledge. I was comfortable pretending everything was alright, that I was happy. If feelings to the contrary came up, I was a master at pushing them down. I knew that I could not allow myself to dwell upon the truth: that I was absolutely miserable. If I did that, I would have to take any and all responsibility for changing my lot. However, Cam had just called me out, and there was no way I could justify my actions.
It was time for some deflection. I said, “So what about you? Why did you become a lawyer? I mean it kind of seems like you are judging me for being aspirational. But the last time I checked, not many people become lawyers for the awesome chance to live in the poorhouse.”
Whew! Good job, Lilly. Way to put Cam on the spot.
“Lilly, you don’t understand. It isn’t about the money. It’s about the motivation. The reason why any of us do what we do,” he responded.
“So in your mind, your motivation is better than mine.”
Gotcha! Cam could not possibly come back from that line of reasoning. I relaxed confidently in my chair, relishing this chance to feel smug for a change. I could see him formulating a lawyer-like retort to throw back at me, and I could not wait to hear it. However, when Cam leaned in to deliver his argument, his gigantic hand knocked over his cup, spilling hot coffee right onto his jeans.
Wow! I actually made the great Cameron Sterling nervous. Was it my witty repartee? My deep observations? Did I sound like a Rhodes scholar?
When Cam sprung up from his chair, I knew it was not any of those things. It was something more basic: Cam’s tree stump of a dick was rock hard. He just knocked over the cup because he was horny. I was disappointed for a few seconds. I actually allowed myself the thought that maybe he had been impressed by something special in me, something other than my body.
But then I had to admit something to myself. Up until that point, that was all that Cam was to me too—a scrumptiously delicious body. I could not be upset if he saw me as the same. Besides, that tempting snake in his jeans looked like it needed to be charmed.
I rushed over to Cam with a dishcloth and tried to vigorously rub the stain out of his jeans. As I stroked with urgency, I looked into his big, brown eyes. He had the same look that he had in the hallway during the gala—lusty. I could practically read his mind, and he was suggesting…no, demanding that I screw him right there on that kitchen table. I calculated in my mind how fast I could clear it: Remove the pastries. Put the cups in the sink. Push the chairs back. Yeah, about fifteen seconds. And then it’s time to fuck!
Cam took me around the small of my waist. With an open mouth, he came at me. Just when things were about to go down, I heard someone clear their throat. Lin had come back into the kitchen. She was now a reluctant witness to a forbidden embrace and quickly lowered her head. I separated myself from Cam and tried to play it off the best I could.
“Lin, do you need something?” I asked her as I nervously tried to compose myself.
“The landscaper has cleared the leaves and needs your okay on the rest of the yard.” Her head was still down; she was too embarrassed to look up.
I glanced back at Cam, who by that time had lost the stiffness of his manhood. I asked him, “Want to see the backyard?”
Cam took a hard look at my rounded behind. “Sure do.”
After Lilly put on some warmer clothes, she and I stepped out of the black-framed French doors leading to the patio. Lilly went directly to the landscaper to give him an assessment of his work. While she was occupied with that, I turned my attention to the property.
From the elevated vantage point of the patio, the sight that greeted me was no ordinary backyard. I was looking over what could only be called a miniature kingdom.
I was rarely impressed by anything, but damn. It was as though God himself had painted a natural portrait on a canvas of air and made sure every color, shape, and sound was situated to duplicate heaven. This visual feast invited me to linger, take my time, and let it all soak in.
Acres and acres of property backed up to a wall of forest so dense it was the botanical equivalent of the Great Wall of China. A veritable field of grass that was as green as a praying mantis was cut with precision, all of its edges perfectly stiff and straight. Rock paths wound their way through massive gardens now dormant for the winter. What struck me as odd was a lonely Adirondack chair next to a fire pit. It had a flowered cushion, so I knew it was Lilly’s. However, with Lilly and Sig sharing a house, really there should have been two chairs.
Another odd yet fascinating feature of the property was an enormous hedge maze. Its tall, evergreen shrubs formed a perfect square of what seemed to be infinite walkways. These wide passages did allow for some cut-throughs, yet I thought the entire maze was still too complicated of a fixture to be in someone’s backyard. I wondered out loud, “Is the maze difficult to traverse?”
By this time Lilly had finished her business with the landscaper. Instead of answering me, she teasingly sprinted down the spiral steps tacked onto the side of the patio, toward the maze’s entrance. She stood there for a moment just smiling at me with a catch-me-if-you-can look. Then she suddenly bolted into the maze. Of course I was not one to turn down a challenge and was immediately off to retrieve her. As I arrived at the fringe of the maze, I heard Lilly calling to me.
“Come and get me, Cam,” she dared.
I like this playful Lilly.
Raising my eyebrow, I took up her taunting invitation. God help her when I caught her. Lilly’s voice was growing softer, indicating that she was going deeper into the complex mesh of passages.
I was about to rush in, but nagging thoughts crept into my mind. Yes, I had decided that I was going to go with the flow and let whatever take its course. But that was ultimately submitting to the fickle whim of circumstance and relinquishing control of my own will. I already knew that I had given up a tremendous amount of control when Lilly answered the door. If I entered that maze, I could possibly be letting go of whatever control I had left. Fate and chance would have permission to step in and fuck me up.
“Lilly, I’ve delivered the papers. I should really be headed back to town,” I yelled as I tried to regain my free will.
A distant voice blithely threatened me. “If you don’t get in here right now, I am going to tell Sig that you did not want to cooperate with me. Then you’ll be in big trouble.”
Well, I could not disappoint the lady, now could I? That is the excuse I gave myself. I charged into the maze with
every intention of capturing Lilly. But the maze proved to be more challenging than I thought. I decided to navigate it by only taking left-hand turns and following Lilly’s giggly laughter. As I traversed the maze, I found myself actually having fun. The freezing temperature and extensive time I spent inside it did not bother me in the least.
I knew this game was just foreplay, and Lilly and I were building up heat. As I pursued her, I felt my already piqued desire growing beyond its normal boundaries. The excitement of the chase and anticipation of the reward of her body are what drove me down those endless paths in search of hidden pleasure.
Suddenly Lilly popped out of one of the shortcuts. She stood in front of me breathing hard, the cold vapor of her breaths shrouding her face like a veil. A wild surge of excitement rose in me at the mere sight of her. It was nearly impossible to stave off an impulse to throw her to the ground and make love to her ferociously. She gawked at me with wanton desire. Her moist, glossed lips eagerly waited for mine to engulf them.
But I did not kiss her. Instead I unzipped her coat. She had these tiny buttons on her pink blouse in the shape of flower petals. I started unbuttoning from the top, taking my time. I tested my limits with every button, but Lilly did nothing to stop me. Though my big fingers had trouble with the delicate buttons, I managed to open her shirt down to her navel. Her skin was flushed with desire and the burn of the numbing wind. I unclasped the front closure of her bra, and her round breasts burst forth. Her nipples, already hard before we even went outside, were now knotted up into two hard balls. I held one of her breasts in my hand. My tongue slowly and softly glided lightly over the nipple at first. Then I pursed my lips around it and suckled. Lilly grabbed the back of my head as I pushed her against the thick hedge.
I placed my other hand between her warm thighs, directly on her sweet spot. I caressed her through her pants. She was so excited that I could feel her body heat penetrate through the fabric. Lilly started to gyrate on my hand, dry humping it. I could not neglect the other breast, so I took it. I held it firmly, and this time I nibbled. I started gently and gradually increased the pressure. My bites were both stimulating and painful, filling her with a crazed thrill.
Just as Lilly reached for my jeans, a shrill and bothersome presence made itself known.
“Lilly! Where are you? You left the door wide open. And whose motorcycle is that?” screamed Sig from the patio.
Lilly looked scared shitless. The passion generating between us had been quelled. That cock-blocking Sig made sure of that. Lilly put her finger to her lips, telling me not to make a sound. Then she quickly buttoned up her shirt and whispered, “Sig can’t know we’re out here. Follow me.”
Quickly, Lilly grabbed my hand, and we whisked through a shortcut in the maze. Once we were outside the shrubs, we ducked as we sneaked to the front of the house. I could see Sig standing on the patio like a dictator. He surveyed the maze, his instincts telling him Lilly was out there. I wanted to stand tall and let him know that I was with her. Just as I was about to show myself to Sig, Lilly looked back at me. Her face was so innocent, so naïve. She was dealing with this awkward situation the best she could. I did not want to cause her drama or harm, so despite my better judgment and pride, I relented and stayed crouched.
Finally, Lilly and I reached the front of the manse. She said, “Go to the living room. Pick up a book like you have been reading it the whole time.”
She gave me a quick kiss. I was dumbstruck for a second at the sweet taste of her lips on mine. However, I recovered and entered the house right behind her. Lilly and I parted ways with her going upstairs and me going to the living room. I grabbed a hardbound book, a collector’s copy of The Scarlet Letter. I flipped to some random page and waited.
This is some high-school bullshit. What am I doing? I should just tell Sig the truth. That I couldn’t get Lilly off my mind. That I thought about her night and day. That I wanted to bed her.
But no matter how conflicted I was, I was not going to jeopardize Lilly’s life. My selfish desires did not warrant the destruction of her well-crafted existence. And the main component of that existence—Sig—was now standing right behind me. I had actually smelled him before he entered the room. His repugnant odor was like a vile mix of bologna and seaweed.
“I did not see you when I came in. Where is Lilly?” Sig asked with more than a bit of suspicion.
I ran my finger over a line in the book, pretending like I was wrapping up a riveting paragraph. “I’ve been here the whole time. Lilly? I don’t know. I think she’s upstairs.”
“Were you upstairs? Did you disrespect my house?”
“Like I told you, I have been here in the living room the whole time.”
I hated lying. I prided myself on telling the truth all the time, no matter who it hurt. I did not even have to lie in my legal cases. Omission, yes. Lying, never. But today I made a concession for Lilly. However, Sig was not like the usual person on a jury. Sig was a feral animal like me. He had finely tuned instincts that had served him well. He knew bullshit when he heard it. Though he needed my expertise to pull off his legal case, I could tell that Sig and I would have to personally interface at some time.
Lilly came down the stairs as if nothing had happened. “Sig, I’m so glad you’re home.”
He pushed her away as she attempted to give him a hug. “Cam says that you were upstairs while he was down here.” Sig studied Lilly’s eyes. “Is that true?”
“Yes, yes. Why would you ask me such a thing?” She was a terrible liar. I knew I had to intervene before she outed both of us. I grabbed the paperwork and handed it to Sig, making sure I stood between him and Lilly.
“Mr. Kroc, Wotherspoon wanted me to deliver this to you personally. That is why I’m here. Nothing else.”
Sig opened the envelope and started looking over the paperwork. His eyes opened wide with displeasure. Whatever was in that envelope surely did rattle him.
“Did you look at the contents?” Sig asked me. He was meeker in his tone now.
“No, I was just the deliverer. Why? Is there something I need to see?”
Sig quickly shoved the papers back into the envelope. “No, nothing. Cam, come with me to my office. Lilly, go back to whatever it is you do during the day.”
All three of us left the living room together. Lilly and I passed each other a covert look before she disappeared into the house.
I followed Sig to his office. As we passed the kitchen, a terribly sour look drifted over Sig’s face. Despite our best efforts to hide the romantic interlude we had earlier, Lilly and I had not covered all our tracks. Lin had not cleared the table yet, and Sig saw our two coffee cups.
He was on our scent now. But I could not blame him for being upset. Lilly was not my woman. She belonged to him. He was the one that had invested in her for whatever reason. Really, all Lilly and I had was an overpowering sexual attraction. I did not know her; she did not know me. I was the interloper, the intruder in his home. And I had indeed disrespected his house.
This situation reminded me that I had to get my head back on straight and remember my goal—making partner. It was a mistake to let down my guard like I had been doing. That is how people destroy themselves and others by neglecting to plan, use self-control, and take responsibility for outcomes.
I should know. That is how it was when I was growing up. My mother did not take control of her situation and look what happened to her. She was now dead as fuck. I was not going to get caught like that. I had to get back in control. I would not let lust take me down.
Chapter Nine
It was evening by the time I got back to the city. Midtown was congested by a jumble of cars and trucks stuck during the rush-hour gridlock. It was times like those when I was glad to have a motorcycle. I was able to weave in and out of traffic, effortlessly passing slow or stopped vehicles and breezing between lanes. But my aggressive driving was not caused solely by a desire to efficiently move through traffic. It was because of what had happe
ned later at Sig’s house.
After I handed off the paperwork to Sig, there was really nothing left for us to talk about. It was strange being in the same room as him, knowing that I had almost fucked his woman a couple of times. And the way the pheromones permeated the air when Lilly and I were around each other, Sig could not help but pick up on what we had been doing. Moreover, I did not like having to sneak around. That was not who I was.
However, that is not what left me vexed. After Sig and I said our good-byes, Lilly joined us. She dutifully took up post next to her money, i.e., Sig. Sig then made it a point to grope her ass. Lilly responded to him with a playful smile. I could not tell whether or not it was an act, or if she truly enjoyed it. But what I did know is that I felt like a third wheel. It dawned on me that I still did not know this woman. The way she could go back and forth so effortlessly between two men was disconcerting.
Even though I felt a connection to Lilly, I was not going to be played. I gave her a polite good-bye and hopped on my bike. I had a sinking feeling all the way back to the city. I had never felt that before. I tried to discern exactly what it was. Then I figured it out. It was jealousy.
After that long ride I arrived at my building and felt something was off. I looked around. Nothing looked amiss. I walked up the stairs to my apartment but still could not shake that nagging feeling. Every few steps I would glance behind me, half expecting to be jumped. But nothing was lurking in the darkness—so it seemed.
I finally made it to my apartment’s level and immediately trained my security camera toward the stairs. After a quick look-over, I let myself in. A figure from the dark jumped out. It tried to wrap itself around me but was so lightweight, I threw it off. I flipped on the light and was about to beat the shit out of that asshole. But what I saw sitting on my floor was no invader. It was Rebecca. No wonder I felt like I was being stalked.