He hesitates. I can hear his labored breathing on the other end. "Yeah, I can come get you. Tell me where you are."
After I tell him I'll be at the boxing gym in Sevilla at ten, I hang up and pray I haven't just signed my own death sentence. I'm bringing all the players together to one location. If I can get them to confess in front of Officer Matthews, this nightmare will be over.
I need to go back in the apartment and pretend I didn't find the knife and gun. Play it cool, Ryan. The only way to save Dalila is to play it cool. I was such a fool thinking Don Sandoval was the one who killed Rico. It was Mateo. I remember what he looked like when he picked us up after the shooting. His eyes were wide and he was too hyped up afterward, like he got a high from the kill.
"Hey," I say as I walk back into the small apartment.
Mateo ends his phone call and looks at me suspiciously. "Why'd you go outside?"
I hold up my duffel. "It's the only thing I've got left, bro." I toss the keys to him.
Mateo smiles warmly, but now I can see through that facade to the blackness of his soul. How many times did he say he had my back? Too many to count. I wanted to believe him, so I did.
I want to fight him so damn bad, but I can't. Not now, at least.
Dalila is anticipating going to a safe house. I feel like the biggest asshole for bringing her to this place. This is the opposite of a safe house and I need to get her out of here. I've only got one play left to get the upper hand.
"You okay?" Mateo asks her.
"Now I am." Dalila looks up at him and breathes a sigh of relief. Damn, she has no clue we just walked into a trap. "Thanks for being such a good friend to Ryan."
"I always have Ryan's back." He pats me on the back. "Right, bro?"
My hands ball into fists at his words. No, he doesn't have my back. "Right," I say with very little emotion. "Listen, I need to tell you somethin'. It's really important."
Mateo raises a curious brow. "What's up?"
I pull Mateo aside. "I hid the money at the gym and need to go get it."
"The two mil?" He almost chokes on the words.
"Two point two. I'm gonna give it to you for helpin' us out." I pat him on the back. "Listen, without you I'd probably be dead."
He chuckles. "That's for sure."
There's hidden meaning behind those words that I only now understand. I have to sweeten the pot, because I need to make sure this works. If he's who I suspect he is, two million isn't a lot of money to him. "I've also got a list of the people Paul has been working with. I figure if you could give that list to the police, they could bring down Las Calaveras."
Mateo agrees. When it gets dark he drives us back to the gym, but it's still too early. Nobody is here. "Why don't we spar one last time, Mateo?" I say. "For old times' sake."
Dalila shakes her head in confusion and grabs my elbow. "What are you doing, Ryan? You can't fight now. We have to leave."
"I'm good," I tell her. "Boxing is my life. You know that, baby." I turn to Mateo. "Our little mission can wait, can't it?"
He checks his watch, then shrugs. "I guess."
Standing beside Dalila, I get into gear. "You need to get out of here," I whisper to her. "Now."
"What are you talking about? No. I won't leave you," she says.
I lean in to kiss her. "Save yourself, baby. This fight is for you," I say in a quiet whisper so only she can hear, then kiss her tenderly. With a last glance hoping she'll understand, I turn and face my fate.
She backs toward the exit as Mateo and I get into the ring, but she doesn't leave. We spar and I let him get in some shots. I'm just trying to kill time, but as he starts getting aggressive, I start pounding on him.
Mateo puts his hands in an X. "Time-out!"
"No. No time-outs today, Mateo." I punch him again and again. I can feel myself losing control. "This is for Rico, for Abuela Carmela . . . for me and Dalila."
He holds his hands in front of his face, shielding my target. "You don't get it, Ryan."
I throw down my gloves. "Why did you do it, huh?"
"Venganza. Revenge." His mouth twists into a wicked grin. "Las Calaveras killed my cousin two years ago and I vowed revenge, so I started Los Reyes del Norte, the new movement. I needed you to rely on me so you could lure Paul onto my turf to bring him and Las Calaveras down. You've got to admit my brilliance. Disabling Demi's car, lending you my truck." He looks cocky when he says, "Have you heard of a remote-control shutoff? Genius, right?" He winks at us then stands in the middle of the ring as if he's the champion. "I made the car stall knowing Dalila's Papa would want to kill you. Rico beating your ass was just a bonus, Ryan, but he ruined my plans when he dumped you back in Loveland. We got even with him, though, didn't we?"
"You didn't have to kill him," I say.
"Hell yeah. I smoked his ass. Bonus when Don Sandoval found the body and saw you first. He didn't frame you, bro. I did. I'm El Fuego, Ryan. Not Don Sandoval. In the end, I always win."
"You'll never win this one, Mateo," Camacho says as he appears from the back room.
Suddenly a barbell is flying through the air. It hits a surprised Mateo in the arm. "You're done," Dalila says, appearing from the shadows.
Mateo laughs, a maniacal laugh that echoes in the gym. He pulls out a gun from his pocket. "I've got a gun, puta. I can smoke all three of you."
"You mean four of us," Pablo says, popping up from behind the front desk with a nine millimeter in one hand. He points the gun at Mateo.
Mateo sneers at Pablo. "Who the fuck do you think you are?"
"I'm Ryan's crew, pendejo. There's no way out of this."
Where's Officer Matthews? If he doesn't come through, we're all dead.
"Just so you know, I've got backup," Mateo warns. "A truckload of guys from Los Reyes del Norte are on their way here with instructions to shoot up this place and everybody in it." Mateo flashes a sick grin. "Besides me, of course."
"How does Santiago fit in with all of this?" I ask.
"Santiago Vega is a snitch. I kill snitches and everyone associated with them. You think your stepfather is any different? Blackburn killed that border patrol guy. Shot him right in the face and got two mil for the hit because the border cop was about to expose him."
"Yeah, but nobody will ever know because we're going to blow this place up," Paul says, suddenly appearing from the back room with Francisco Cruz right behind him. "Ryan, where's the money?"
I eye my duffel in the middle of the gym. "That's not all of it," I tell him.
Paul walks toward the duffel while Cruz blocks the entrance. Pablo points to a cell phone that he rigged in the corner of the room and signals to me that he's been secretly recording everything this entire time. It's all the evidence Officer Matthews will need to take them down.
"Where is the rest of the cash, Ryan?" Paul pulls a gun out and points it at me.
Cruz is pointing a gun at Pablo, then at Camacho.
Mateo points his gun at Dalila.
Helicopters are flying overhead now and the sound of sirens can be heard in the distance. We're about to be surrounded. I can tell by the fire in Mateo's eyes that he's not ready to be taken down. Not by a long shot.
In the ring, desperate men do desperate things. We're all feeling desperate. If I don't move quickly, it's either my crew or me.
It's time to take one for my team.
I walk over to the cell phone and pick it up. "This has been recording the entire time," I tell them. "All I have to do is send it to the authorities. Put the guns down and I won't do it."
All guns are now pointed at me.
As I press Send, Mateo curses at me and I see the fire flash out of the barrel of his gun. I'm not surprised I hear the loud pop before I actually feel anything. Something cold pierces my gut and my shoulder. I know I've been hit.
Paul and Cruz attempt to escape, but more shots ring out as the doors burst open. US and Mexican forces fill the gym. They're finally here. I breathe in, but a sharp pain makes
me wince.
Dalila is suddenly next to me. I can tell by her gasp when she moves my hand away from the wound that it's bad. "Why did you do that?" she says through uncontrollable sobs.
"I had to. He was gonna shoot you. All of you." I reach out for her hand and tell her what I should have said a long time ago. "I love you, Dalila."
My girl, her eyes glazed over with fury, stands in front of me as if she's some shield. I try to pull her back, but my energy is waning fast and I'm starting to have trouble hearing. It's like I'm in a fog.
"I'll kill you," Dalila growls at Mateo.
Mateo grabs her and attempts to run out with her as his shield, but Don Sandoval walks in and growls. "Step away from my daughter or the authorities have orders to shoot."
"Not if I've got faster reflexes, old man," Mateo warns. I hear shots ring out. Mateo falls to the ground, his body riddled with bullets. He's dead.
Everything is so foggy and distant, as if I'm not even here. All I know is that Dalila is safe now. My own mind is fading fast. This isn't how it's supposed to end . . . when I feel like my life just began.
I hear Dalila crying as she clutches me.
"I'll always go where you go . . ." I manage to say. I want to say more, but I feel like I'm slipping away into nothingness.
"Stay with me, Ryan! Please!" she pleads.
"I can't."
"No! Don't leave me. I need you!"
"I wish . . ." I try to get out the words but I'm feeling so weak right now. I know I don't have much time. "Live for me . . ."
"I can't," she sobs, her tears falling on our entwined fingers.
"You're the strongest girl I know, baby . . . the strongest . . ."
The last thing I hear is her voice telling me she's with me and she's never letting me go. The last thing I feel is her touch, her love . . . finally giving me a sense of peace.
Forty-Six
Dalila
"Dalila, are you ready?" Margarita asks me as she peeks her head into my room. She's wearing a pretty skeleton costume with a white tutu and black leggings. "Mama says we're leaving in a few minutes."
I'm wearing a colorful dress today, because it's Dia de los Muertos, the Day of the Dead. I'm trying not to become emotional as I gather everything I'll need for tonight.
When I walk downstairs, a crowd of people is waiting for me in the courtyard. Soona and Demi are carrying the sugar skulls we decorated this afternoon. Mama is holding a handful of cempasuchil flowers that she grew in her garden. My sisters are helping Lola carry trays of fresh tamales she just made.
Papa walks into the courtyard lugging a gym mat. "Are you sure you don't want us to bring pillows and blankets? Ryan's spirit has a long journey ahead of him. Maybe he'd be more comfortable resting on something softer."
I shake my head as I pat the gym mat. "No. This is perfect, Papa. Thank you for getting it."
"You ready?" Mama asks.
"Yes." As ready as I'll ever be.
We arrive at the cemetery near Sevilla. There are already people gathered around the gravestones. Music is playing, and it's like a big party has begun. I don't have to search for Ryan's gravesite. I've been here more times than I can count in the past four months since he passed that fateful summer night.
This isn't a day to mourn him, I remind myself. It's to celebrate his life. I called his mother last week and invited her to join me today. She said she might, but I haven't heard from her since.
After Papa sets down the familiar gym mat for Ryan's spirit to rest on after his long journey, I set the cempasuchil around his gravesite, which will be a welcoming sight as his spirit is guided back to me. Soona, Demi, and I set the sugar skulls on top of his gravestone. Mine has colorful flowers painted on it because I remember him telling me how he liked the bright colors of our paintings and murals. I also added hearts into the eyes, because I saw love reflected in his eyes long before he told me he loved me.
"Don't forget the tamales!" Coco calls out as Galena places the platter of tamales on top of his now-crowded stone.
Who knew when we joked about me putting tamales on his grave that it would become a reality not long after? Every day since Ryan was killed I've wanted to give up, but he wouldn't want that. He'd want me to soldier on, to fight like he did in the ring and out of it.
So I am.
I reach into my bag and pull out the little heart-shaped stone I found on the ground when we were stranded that first night we made love. He said the stone was good luck. The stone must have summoned Ryan, because it led him to the truth about Mateo. I kiss the stone, then set it on the gym mat.
"We've got to go," Mama says. "It's a long drive to Abuela Carmela's house. We have a lot of things to bring to her gravesite. And then we'll be visiting Lucas's grave in the morning."
"I know." I hug my parents and sisters. "Thank you for being here."
Since Ryan passed, my parents have helped me cope with the loss of the boy I fell in love with. I'll never lose faith in them again. My father lost his way at one point and got blinded by money and bribes. He wanted to redeem himself and make Abuela Carmela proud by helping Santiago Vega and the authorities take down Las Calaveras and Los Reyes del Norte. He had to keep it all a secret to protect us. Now Papa is lobbying to be a judge. I'm really proud of him. The night Ryan died, his stepfather was arrested along with Francisco Cruz thanks to the evidence recorded on the cell phone. If it weren't for Ryan bringing all of them together, they wouldn't have been arrested so soon and the war between the cartels would have raged on.
After my family leaves the cemetery, I close my eyes as I hold Demi's and Soona's hands. I feel a calm wash over me as I imagine Ryan's spirit coming home to me.
"I'm starting at the university in January, Mr. America," I say out loud, hoping Ryan can hear me. I'm trying not to choke up, because today is a celebration of his life. It's not a time to be sad. "I'm going to study law and become an advocate for underprivileged kids like Sergio." I never want kids to feel alone in this world. Making my country the best it can be will be my life's mission.
"Something's missing here," a voice calls out above the music playing.
I look over to see Pablo walking over to us with a Lone Star Boxing Club towel in his hand. "Hess will need this," he says, placing the towel on the gym mat. He stares at Ryan's gravestone for a long time. "We met at the club the first week he moved to Texas. I thought he was a gringo who couldn't box." He chuckles to himself. "I was wrong. He beat the crap out of me. Ryan was a damn good fighter and could have been one of the best. A legend, like Camacho."
"Did someone mention my name?"
Juan, with his gray hair neatly combed and his gait a little lighter than when I last saw him, is wearing a big smile on his face. He's also got an old championship belt slung over his shoulder. The shiny metal glitters in the moonlight. "This is for Ryan. I won it many years ago," Camacho says as he places the belt in front of Ryan's grave. "You'll always be a champion to me, mi hijo."
"I'm glad you're here," I say, hugging the old man tight. "Ryan will love your gift."
After Juan tells stories about the first time he met Ryan at the gym, I hold up a hand. "You'll have to humor me, everyone," I say as I set up little speakers and plug in my phone. I press Play and Atticus Patton's voice fills the air, clashing with the traditional Spanish music at the other end of the cemetery. "Shadows of Darkness was our favorite band. We met at the concert."
"We didn't even have a ticket to that concert," Pablo chimes in. "We snuck in posing as caterers. You almost didn't meet."
"It was fate," Soona says as she takes Pablo's hand in hers.
As we all dance and sing to the music, I step back and see that Ryan had a crew. These are the people who cared about him most. He thought he was alone in this world, but he had more than a lot of people can boast about.
Being independent was my goal in life, but I was wrong. It's about making meaningful connections with people who'll stick up for you and be your champions.
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Sometimes you never know what's missing in your life until it's right in front of your face.
I never thought I needed a hero, until I met Ryan Hess.
Acknowledgments
First and foremost, I would like to thank my editor, Emilia Rhodes, for her unending support and encouragement while I wrote many versions of this book. I'll never forget your faith in me and I am so happy to be working with you and your entire staff. I feel so honored to be part of the HarperCollins family!
I would like to thank my amazing agent, Kristin Nelson, for always cheering me on and continuing to make sure my books find the best homes possible. And to Pete Harris, who held me up and never let me fall. Your emails that said simply "Call me, I'm here for you!" throughout this process helped me more than you will ever know. You're a wonderful person and I definitely owe you a drink and a spa day the next time I come to LA!
Dalila and Ryan came alive due to some very important people! Claudia was a great sensitivity reader who provided valuable insight on the Latino community and Mexican culture to make this book the best it could be. Maria Perez-Chavez was a fan who became my beta reader who helped so much with the book. You are an amazing woman and I am so thankful for your input! And to my fan Jose Ibarra and his stunning wife, Natalie, who helped when I was out of ideas. I miss you both and am still honored that I stood up as a bridesmaid in your wedding!
I am in awe of Margie Longoria, a devoted librarian from Texas who has dedicated her life to putting books in the hands of teens. Your input helped make Dalila and Ryan's journey magical. Margie, you are a role model for all librarians and I wish everyone had your passion. You are a true gem!
I don't know what I'd do without my friends Cynthia Singer, Nanci Martinez, and Mindy Berman. You are all strong, incredible women who give me strength, comfort, and a shoulder to cry on when I need it. Nasien, thank you for your encouragement and support.
Finally, I want to thank my mom, Fran, who is annoying and crazy and wonderful and my rock. My children, Brett and Samantha, make sure my life is never dull. You both challenge me and drive me nuts but I'll go to the ends of the earth to make sure you're safe, happy, and healthy.
I love interacting with my fans on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram, so come find me! You can find my website at www.simoneelkeles.com.
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