So many wasted years. It made Kate so sad. The first few years after Blaire moved away, Kate was so busy with medical school and marriage that it was easy to put her old friend out of her mind. And when she mentioned the idea of calling her to Simon, he’d always discourage her and remind her how Blaire had tried to break them up. But she couldn’t lay all of this at Simon’s feet.
Blaire had been her touchstone, helping her through her anxiety through high school and then her depression after Jake’s death, never adding to Kate’s burden by telling her that her reckless actions had caused Blaire to lose her baby. And then Kate had turned her back on Blaire because of one fight. She would never be able to absolve herself of that. This new Blaire, though, the one who had done all of those horrible things, was someone who Kate didn’t know how to connect with. She was at a complete loss, and though she wished she could take back all the years of silence, there was no going back. But when she got a call from Enid, of all people, telling her that Blaire had had a complete breakdown, she knew she couldn’t stay away. This was her sister! After all, Blaire had pulled her out of the house at the last minute. She hadn’t been able to hurt her, when it really came down to it. And Kate’s therapist had explained that in Blaire’s twisted logic, she truly believed that what she had done to Kate had a noble purpose. She was trying to save Kate from Simon, who she believed was the villain.
Enid told Kate that Blaire had gone to Hollywood, as her mother had done so many years before her, in search of fame. Her connections had all turned their backs on her—they had all seen her disgrace play out online, and no one would return her calls. Then one day, she totally lost it, tried to stab a producer at the Polo Lounge, and been arrested. Her lawyer had been the one to get in touch with Enid, who’d flown out and helped to get Blaire into Los Angeles’s finest private psychiatric facility to avoid jail time. Even though Blaire had more than enough money, Kate had insisted on paying for her extended stay. She didn’t know what Lily’s intended provision for Blaire had been, but she felt responsibility as a family member and someone who had contributed to Blaire’s decline. Still, this was the first visit she had made.
Enid met her in the lobby of the stately facility, more like a luxurious country club than a medical institution. It had been years since Kate had seen Enid, and she looked so much older.
Enid walked slowly toward Kate. “Thank you for coming,” she said.
“I’m glad you called. Is there somewhere we can talk before I go in to see her?” Kate was nervous and wanted to get her bearings first.
Enid nodded. “There’s a lounge outside her wing. The elevator’s this way. You’ll sign in upstairs.”
They rode in silence to the fifth floor, where Kate followed Enid to a seating area.
“I have to say I’m surprised you’re here,” Kate said. “I thought you and Blaire hated each other.”
Enid took a deep breath and shook her head. “I never hated her. I tried to be a mother to her, but she wanted nothing to do with me. I won’t lie to you, Kate. There’s no love lost between us. But I did love her father. And I promised when I married him to do my best to take care of his child. I tried to keep up with her over the years, but she cut me off after her father died. I had put money in a trust for her.” She shrugged. “But by the time it matured, she didn’t need it anymore and told me where I could put it. I’ve sent her emails through her author website, but she never answered. I’m just glad her lawyer was able to get in touch when this happened.”
Kate shook her head. “Blaire always acted as though you didn’t want her around.”
“I wanted to try and help her. It was her father’s decision to send her away. Once we married, she was merciless in her campaign to get me out. She’d hide my blood pressure medicine. Or sneak outside and put my car windows down in the rain. Once, she went through my closet and threw half my clothes in a dumpster down the street.”
Kate was shocked. Blaire had never mentioned any of this to her.
Enid put her hands up. “She did a lot of angry things. We had her evaluated, but she was only twelve, so they wouldn’t label her with a personality disorder. But I could read between the lines. Shaina was a narcissist and had borderline personality disorder. Even if they didn’t share a gene pool, she raised Blaire in those formative years.”
“What did the doctors who evaluated her say?”
Enid shrugged. “To make her feel loved. Try and undo the damage done by her adoptive mother’s abandonment. I never agreed with Ed about keeping the adoption a secret, but he wouldn’t budge. He was afraid she’d never forgive him for lying in the first place.” She sighed. “We took her to therapy for over a year, and she hated every minute of it. Wouldn’t open up to the doctor. She had a hole in her heart that was too big to fill.”
Kate turned to Enid. “How could I not have seen it? She was my best friend. She even lived with us, and I thought she was happy. She was always so much fun.”
Enid gave Kate a sad look. “She puts on a good front. She always had a bit of the actress in her.”
“I didn’t realize how much she needed my family.”
“When she came home, all she talked about was how much better Lily and Harrison were than her father and me. It about killed Ed.”
Kate wondered about Blaire’s mother. When they were in college, she’d asked Blaire if she was going to try and find her, but Blaire had said she wanted nothing to do with Shaina. “Do you know what happened to her mother?”
Enid nodded. “She died when Blaire was in college. Drug overdose. She still had Blaire’s father listed as her next of kin.”
Kate digested this news. Why hadn’t Blaire ever told her?
“What do the doctors here say? What’s her state of mind?”
“She’s had what they call a split. She’s delusional. A complete break with reality. She thinks she’s a big star and that her husband is Seth Ackerman.”
Kate’s eyes widened. “I don’t know what to say to her.”
Enid looked at Kate. “It doesn’t matter. Just be kind and follow her lead. Tell her you loved her in her latest movie. Just let her believe that you’re still her friend. It won’t matter what you say. Only that you came.”
Kate looked at Enid, the woman she’d believed to be a wicked stepmother all these years, and felt a keen sadness for her and for Blaire. Maybe she wasn’t the kind of mother Blaire yearned for, but she had cared for her stepdaughter. And Blaire hadn’t been able to see it. She’d been so scarred by Shaina’s leaving that she saw everything through a distorted lens.
Kate got up and walked to the nurse’s station outside the locked door.
“Ms. Barrington is in the last room at the end of the hall,” the woman told Kate.
She felt her heart skip as the door was buzzed open and she walked through. She took her time walking down the hallway, taking deep breaths and trying to stay calm. When she reached the end of the hallway, the door was shut. She knocked.
“Who is it?” The voice was guarded.
“Kate. It’s Kate.” Her voice trembled.
“Katie! I’ve been waiting for you,” Blaire answered, her voice happy. The door swung open, and Kate walked in.
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Acknowledgments
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About the Author
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The Last Time I Saw You Page 28