by Maggie Cox
Smiling gently, Kate clasped Luca’s hand in both of hers.
‘For whatever reason, Sophia did what she did. It sounds like her deep personal sorrow went beyond where anybody could reach her or help her put it right. Not even a loving husband! I’m sorry for what you both must have endured in not being able to have a child of your own. But I’m more sorry for what you have had to endure since—blaming yourself for Sophia’s tragic death.’
Luca did not know what to say. All he knew was that the kindness that shone like a fiercely bright beacon from Katherine’s beguiling gaze was stirring him in the most profound way. It was making him dare to imagine that life could be far better than it had been for a long time, and he realised that he passionately wanted that. You have to take care of each other too, she had reminded him. Well…he could definitely relate to Katherine’s friend’s husband. Sophia had hardly even looked at him in the final weeks of her life, when her sorrow over not being able to conceive a child had made her withdraw further and further inside herself.
It was not until now that Luca had fully allowed himself to experience the reality of feeling both rejected and neglected by her. There had been times when he had been so alone with the deep unhappiness that racked him that he’d hardly been able to bear it! And for the past three years he had shut out every bit of possible comfort from another human being in order to protect himself from any further hurt. It was as though he had hidden himself in a deep dark cave when he had really needed to place himself in the light…in the warmth…in a place where he could see that life did have more to offer than just more pain.
What if Katherine was that place Luca needed to be?
‘I would like something,’ he said now, getting to his feet and coaxing her to hers. Holding her hands, he sensed her sweet, lovely scent dance on the warm air between them, and it stirred into life the deep, exquisite longing that had become his constant companion since that very first time Luca had laid eyes on her.
‘Anything,’ she replied softly, her delectable dark brown eyes shimmering.
‘A kiss,’ he breathed, and, gently sliding his fingers beneath her delicate jaw, he drew her face towards his own.
Their lips met and clung, the heartfelt contact instigating a renewed vitality and a sense of coming home that moved Luca almost unbearably. The longing inside him grew into a sharp hunger as their tongues mingled and danced, and glorious wild honey infiltrated his bloodstream, banishing all previous traces of sorrow from his mind. All he wanted to do was gather Katherine up into his arms and carry her through the mansion’s high, echoing corridors to their bedroom, then make love to her long into the fragrant moonlit evening.
But just when Luca had decided to act on that feverish, irresistible impulse, he remembered her visit to the hospital, and the reason he had made the decision to bring her to Milan. He would not jeopardise either Katherine’s wellbeing or the baby’s because he could not control his near overwhelming desire for her! To deny himself what he craved above all else was pure torture, but Luca had to heed the logic of his own reasoning.
Gradually, and reluctantly, he began to ease out of the sweetly erotic kiss that promised to lead to so much more if he would just let it. Sensing the tension in Katherine’s slender frame, and cupping her face, letting the luxurious curtain of sable hair ripple onto her shoulders, Luca stroked his thumbs across her impossibly soft cheeks and smiled. ‘You kiss like an angel. You could make any man your slave with such kisses!’
‘But I don’t want just “any” man, Luca.’
‘No?’ he teased. The promise in her eyes could not help but increase the powerful need that already gripped him, and it made his body ache for her so much that Luca could have wept with frustration.
‘Don’t you know?’ she asked. ‘Don’t you know how much I—’
‘Scusi, Signor De Rossi…signorina…’
Luca’s smiling housekeeper appeared. She was carrying some drinks on a small round tray which she placed on the pretty lattice work iron table beside them. Inwardly cursing at the interruption—what had Katherine been going to say to him just then?—Luca glanced wryly at the woman whose lovely face he still framed between his hands and reluctantly allowed her to extricate herself and move away.
He made a joke in Italian to Orsetta about her unfortunate timing and the older woman swiftly apologised, glancing over at Katherine with an apologetic shrug of the shoulders. Luca found he did not have it in him to be angry with this most faithful and loyal member of his staff. Instead he thanked her for her thoughtfulness in bringing them refreshments. Beaming at him, Orsetta told him that dinner would not be long, then left him and Katherine alone again.
‘That night when we first met…you told me you felt lost.’ She had moved back to her seat at the table and was frowning up at him as she spoke. ‘Was that because you were thinking about your wife?’
What was she getting at? Luca wondered. He went up behind her and laid his hands on her shoulders. With a primal satisfaction he felt the definite quiver that rippled through her in response to his touch.
‘She had been on my mind that day, yes,’ he admitted. ‘But only because I had inadvertently found the book she had been reading on the yacht. Of course it had stirred things up inside me. But can we not talk about this any more tonight? I would much rather concentrate on us!’
‘All right, then.’
‘Now…where were we before Orsetta interrupted us? Ah, yes…You were also about to tell me something? What was it, Katherine?’
‘Do you know what?’ She turned towards him, her expression guarded all of a sudden, her eyes only briefly meeting his, as if she feared Luca might see something she did not want him to see. ‘Could we talk about this later? I suddenly feel the need to go and lie down for a while. The effect of all the travelling has definitely caught up with me. Do you mind if I give dinner a miss tonight? I’m really not hungry at all.’
‘It is not a question of if I mind, Katherine! Are you feeling all right? You are not unwell?’ Luca’s voice was unwittingly sharp as he misread the reason why Katherine would not look directly at him. He was praying hard she was not trying to conceal some acute discomfort from him that had to do with the baby.
‘I’m perfectly well. I’m just a little tired, that’s all.’
‘You are sure that is all? You are not hiding anything from me?’
‘No, Luca. I’m not.’
Disappointed that he could not keep her right where she was, Luca bit back intense frustration and regret. ‘Then go and get some rest and I will look in on you later.’
‘You really don’t mind?’
‘Of course not! Why should I object to you going to lie down when I brought you here so that you could have all the rest you need?’
‘I’ll see you later, then.’
Rising to her feet, Katherine hurried from the terrace. The minute she had gone, and he was alone again, Luca missed her like a limb that had been severed from his body….
CHAPTER TEN
WAS Luca still in love with his wife? When he had admitted that he had been thinking about her the night they had met, Kate’s heart had sunk with new hurt. Could his continuing sorrow over her death have driven him into Kate’s arms that night? He had asked her if she had gone to bed with him on the rebound, but what if he had made love to her purely because he’d been in need of some physical consolation and nothing else? Had she simply imagined the strong connection she was so certain she’d felt?
Her mind and body suffused with hurt and confusion, Kate crossed her arms over her chest and moved towards the open French windows in the bedroom. Even the heady, sensual scent of lillies and blossoming mimosa borne on the warm Mediterranean air could not lift her spirits right then. Staring out unseeingly, she shook her head. Luca had suggested they marry, but what hope had she for a future with him if his heart still belonged to a woman who no longer lived? she asked herself. And how would their child fare growing up in such an atmosphere?
> On the terrace just now—before his housekeeper had appeared—Kate had been going to confess that she loved him, but the moment had passed and she had lost the courage to pursue it.
Moving over to the enormous bed, she picked up a satin pillow and clutched it to her chest, then dropped down onto the lush counterpane. What should she do?
‘Katherine?’
She glanced up in astonishment to find the object of her musing at the door. Closing it behind him, Luca walked towards her. He owned the room with that walk…He would captivate any woman in any room anywhere with just the sheer magnetism of his presence, Kate was certain. There would always be a ripple of excitement…of danger…a need to discover what made such an enigmatic man tick…followed by a silent gnawing hunger to know what it would feel like to be made love to by him.
Kate knew that because they were exactly the sensations she had experienced when she had seen him for the first time. And that same dizzying leap of hunger and pleasure and bone-melting desire sizzled through her now. Practically on sight she had detected that that there was something behind that civilised Mediterranean façade of his that hinted at a certain wildness of spirit—of nature—underneath. But, although he had more than his fair share of arresting masculine attributes, there was also a grace about Gianluca De Rossi that made him even more spellbinding and unforgettable in Kate’s eyes.
‘What is it? Is something the matter?’
‘No.’ As Luca reached the side of the bed, the expression on his handsome face was both reflective and brooding as he gazed down at her. ‘Yes. As a matter of fact there is something the matter.’
Swallowing hard, Kate stared, her mind racing towards all kinds of distressing conclusions. The main one being that he didn’t want her with him after all. He was still in love with the memory of his wife.
‘I want to know what you were going to tell me just now…when we were out on the terrace. I could not relax when you left because the words you had started to say kept going round and round in my head and I will not have any peace until I know!’
Clutching the crimson cushion against her chest even more tightly, Kate widened her dark eyes as she gazed up at Luca. Backed into a corner, she could either prevaricate or simply speak the truth. She chose the latter.
‘I was going to say…don’t you know how much I love you?’
Someone exhaled…deeply. She did not know whether it was him or her. The sound brushed through the air like velvet.
‘You love me?’ he asked.
‘Yes…I do.’
Because she detected no immediate change in Luca’s serious façade, Kate was gripped by such a terrible cold fear that he was about to reject her that all her faculties seemed to suddenly freeze. But then he started to smile, and again she was struck by how hypnotic that blue-eyed gaze of his could be…how lethal to someone who had found she had no defences at all to protect herself from an expression that struck the most profound, unmatched delight in her heart and made her more vulnerable than she’d ever been in her life.
‘That is all right, then.’
‘It is?’
‘Sì. Now I can relax, tesoro mio.’
Before Kate realised his intention, Luca had dropped down onto the bed beside her and was stroking his hand over her hair. She heard the muted thud of his shoes hit the carpet as he kicked them off and her body quivered almost violently.
‘You don’t mind?’ she whispered. ‘That I love you?’
He chuckled, and the deliciously sensual sound was like being wrapped in the most luxurious warm towels after a deep, fragrant, longed-for hot bath.
‘Do you know what it is like for a man who has more or less given up on the possibility of happiness for ever to hear a woman he cares for deeply say that she loves him?’ His hand swept her hair back from her face and tenderly cupped her cheek. ‘I fell in love with you the night of the party, my dear Katherine. This is true. It was a party that I did not want to give…but by the end of the evening I was glad that I had—because I met you.’
‘And you’re not still in love with your wife, Luca? From time to time when you seemed to hold back from me I thought it was because of that!’
‘If I did hold back it was because I did not want to overwhelm you with my desire for you…nor potentially harm the baby! When you had that scare this morning, before we flew out to Milan, I was devastated at the thought that something might happen to you or our unborn child! Listen to me Katherine. I know my own heart and it belongs to you now…not to poor Sophia! It was a terrible tragedy that she died the way she did, but it is you I love! You need never fear that I am lying about that!’
‘All this time?’ She pulled his hand away from her face and held it. ‘You’ve loved me all this time, Luca?’
‘Sì.’
His gorgeous smile, delicious voice and incredible eyes all made Kate feel weak…deliriously, happily weak.
‘But when you left like you did the next morning I was thrown into confusion! My pride was hurt too, so I did not try to find you. Then three months later you miraculously appear, only for me to learn that our night together had resulted in you falling pregnant! And it seemed to me that you had made no effort in all that time to even let me know! For a while I confess that I had the most terrible suspicions that the baby might not be mine. I will tell you now that I was tormented by the very idea that you had been with another man after the incredible night we had shared!’
‘I made you miserable.’ Kate’s sigh was heavy with regret. ‘But I didn’t mean to. I really did want to get in touch with you, Luca, but I was petrified of making another mistake after what had happened to me before…when my ex did what he did…That night stirred up a lot of painful stuff from my past…difficult and hurtful memories that really stung. Mostly it stirred up my old feelings of not being good enough! That’s why I ran away that morning in Milan. I feared that in the cold light of day you would reject me anyway, and therefore I should spare myself the pain and leave you first!’
Gazing into Luca’s eyes, she let her slender shoulders slump a little.
‘My mother died not long before I got together with Hayden, and my confidence was badly shaken by her death. That’s the truth. I think that’s why I deluded myself about him. I just wanted somebody to really care about me because I was frightened of being alone. But I could never have gone with another man after being with you, Luca…never!’
Levelling his arresting glance on her with seriousness and concern, Luca entwined his fingers tightly with Kate’s as he spoke. ‘Hear this. I will never reject you—and neither do I want you ever to feel not good enough again! You have no reason to believe that about yourself, no matter what anyone else says or does! You are a lovely, beguiling woman, and as well as your outer beauty it is the beauty of your soul that touches my heart the most, sweet Katherine.’
Barely knowing how to answer such a wonderful declaration, Kate leaned forward and touched her lips gently to Luca’s cheek. The whisper of sandalwood-scented cologne and the soft/rough texture of his skin was a sensual cocktail bar none.
‘You don’t know what it means to me to hear you say that! And now I have something to show you.’
Leaning across him to reach the cherrywood cabinet beside the bed, Kate retrieved her purse and took out what looked to be a black and white photograph. Handing it to Luca, she tucked her hair behind her ear and smiled.
‘This is a picture of our baby in my womb. The hospital gave it to me after I had my ultrasound.’
He was staring down at the photograph as though studying the meaning of the universe. There was the brief movement of a muscle contracting at the corner of his mouth, and Kate saw how affected he was. She had experienced the same mixture of awe and elation when she’d first seen the picture.
‘They asked me if I wanted to know the baby’s sex but I said no…You don’t mind waiting to find out, do you?’
Tearing his gaze away from the photo at last, and raising his head to look at Kate
, Luca knew his feelings were transparent. ‘I do not mind…no. It will be all the more wonderful on the day of the birth to find out then! This is such a miracle to me—to see this…’ He shook his head almost with reverence. ‘It is something I thought never to see! God is good, yes?’
‘Yes, Luca.’ Kate smiled. ‘God is good. And I know I have many reasons to count my blessings! Why don’t you keep the picture in your wallet?’
‘I would like that.’ He tucked it carefully into his shirt pocket.
‘And you won’t hold it against me even the smallest bit that I ran away that morning?’
‘No…’ He appeared to be mulling the idea over. ‘But you will have to recompense me…and in a way of my choosing.’
‘Oh?’
Immediately Kate saw that he was teasing her, and her tummy flipped as her body was suffused with the most delicious heat. He was staring at the row of buttons down the front of her dress, and one by one he started to undo them.
Looking up, he caught and held her startled glance. ‘I want to see my woman—the mother of my child—as God made her.’
Letting out a shaky breath, Kate hardly dared move a muscle. Although her need for him was great, she welcomed this unexpectedly gentle side to his lovemaking with a profound pang of love and excitement. The reverence with which he undid her clothing was even more erotic than if he had torn it off her body in a blaze of passionate heat, and she couldn’t help shivering.
Removing her dress completely, he laid his hands on the slender slopes of her shoulders and kissed her once, twice on the mouth, then drew deliberately away again when Kate’s lips would have clung to his for more. Smiling knowingly, lazily, perfectly aware that he was drawing out the tension between them, playing it like the most exquisite harpstring, Luca was clearly revelling in having the upper hand.