by P. K. Tyler
Nik looked up at her, the words he ached to say pounding in his chest. He should be over this fear by now, but there it was, glaring at him and forcing him to hide back in his shell like a little kid who'd been beaten too many times.
"What about when they find out I'm gay?" he finally said.
Vai shrugged. "Some of them will hate it. Call you an abomination or try to fight you."
"Fight me?" Nik laughed. "What are we fourteen?"
"Men here are macho, they were raised to be rough and prove how manly they are. It's schoolyard law. I won't lie to you, in our culture, being gay is against the law, but you weren't raised here. You don't have a father to beat you or disown you and, outside of the family, most people mind their own business. Some Romani hold to the old ways, it's true. It's why I left."
"Then why do you come back?"
"This is my family," Vai said simply. "They drive me insane. The pressure to marry. The pressure to be a mother, be more feminine. But even with all the rules I've broken, I've never been outcast. You have to remember, we are the Bino-Wuzhokh. There are only so many of us left."
"You don't live here."
"Because I don't want to." Vai rubbed her upper arms. "Come inside. If Ma says you’re family, few people will go against her."
"I won't lie about who I am." Nik clenched his jaw.
"I won't ask you to and Ma won't either. She's the phuri dai, the people won't go against her."
"So I'll get away with it because I'm a Sin Eater? What about Zeph? What about any gay kids here?"
"It'll be hard for them, but maybe you can help."
Nik shook his head, shoulders hunched forward as he chewed over everything he'd learned. More lives to save, more responsibility toward people he’s not sure would even want him around.
"Tonight, everyone is gathering at the clearing near my parents’ place for a bonfire. There'll be food and music. You'll get to meet my incredibly self-satisfied sister, and, if you're lucky, my fiancé will be there."
"Your fiancé?"
"Yeah, engaged at the age of 13. I refused to get married when I turned 16 like I was supposed to, claimed I wanted to finish school first. As soon as I graduated I moved to the city. Same day. He's still waiting for me to come back."
"Well, at the very least, I think I need to see this."
"Thanks for the support." Vai frowned and targeted Nik with dagger eyes before turning and walking back toward the house.
With a worm of worry slithering in his gut, Nik followed.
Chapter Six
Nik followed Vai through a well-worn path between trees from Ma's house, flickering light from a large bonfire visible even from the other end of the path. It was a straight shot and a quick walk to the big clearing.
Instead of a house in the middle, like Ma's set up, the bonfire took up most of the space. Across from where they entered, two small mobile homes came into view.
As they walked further in, he saw two more pairs of mobile homes, a pair to his left and one to his right. Between each of the mobile homes grouped together, dirt roads wound through the trees and back out into the world.
Noise and chaos rang out all around them as men and women gathered together. Children ran into the forest, only to dart back out again with a yell.
A stunning young woman rushed toward them. She made a beeline for Vai and held her arms out, focused on her target. Her long black hair trailed out beneath the scarf tied over her head and a billowy teal skirt accentuated her deeply tanned skin. Eyes the color of glaciers shone with happy tears as she threw her arms around Vai, nearly tackling her down to the ground.
"Dorenia." Vai briefly hugged the woman and held her at arm’s length. She let go with one hand to gesture at Nik, but kept a firm grip on the exuberant gypsy. "This is Nikolai Grekh. He's staying with us for a bit." She turned to him. "Nik, this is my sister, Dorenia."
The woman's smile faltered. "A gadje?" Dorenia recoiled. "You bring an outsider here? And what about Riley? He's still waiting for you, you know."
"Nik is Bino-Wuzhokh, Dorenia. We're not together." Vai lowered her voice and leaned closer to her sister, glaring.
"Ma has accepted him as one of our own, and we are to treat him as such."
Dorenia gasped and appraised Nik. He could practically feel her eyes rolling over his tight jeans and black leather jacket in judgment. Her mouth curled and she turned to Vai, still keeping an eye on Nik. "He's not staying with us, if that's what you're planning.”
Vai straightened. "Ma said he can stay in the Hernes' old place. And stop being a bigot."
"I am not a bigot!"
"Right." Vai released her hold on her sister and stepped closer to Nik. "Come on, I'll introduce you to everyone else."
They moved deeper into the clearing, circling the large bon fire in the center with Dorenia trailing behind.
"So that's your sister?" Nik leaned close to whisper in Vai's ear.
"Yeah, sometimes I wish I'd been in foster care."
"Trust me, you don't."
They wove through haphazard rows of lawn chairs and furniture that looked like it hadn't been inside a house in years, scattered at various distances between the trees and the fire. Kids ranging from the age they could walk on up stuck sausages or marshmallows on sticks and held them as close to the flames as they could comfortably get. A few women held babies bundled up against them, secured with cloth slings.
Girls fluttered in and out of trailers carrying plates of fruit and vegetables. They passed them around, before setting them down in unoccupied seats to go get more. Some of the older men wore loafers that looked more like house slippers than shoes meant for outdoors.
Nik couldn't help but sneak a peek at Vai's white sneakers. They shone in the darkness like an insult.
They came to a stop at one of the trailers and, when Nik looked up, he found Dorenia had followed his gaze down to Vai's shoes.
Her eyebrows bunched together and she frowned. She kept her voice low, glancing around as though she were imparting classified information. "You want me to take those to your trailer, Vai? I don't think anyone else has noticed yet."
Vai stared at her sister. "I'm not ashamed of the fact that I make enough money to buy new shoes."
She walked up the three steps, knocked twice on the door, and entered the small mobile home. Still in the doorway, she turned to Nik. "I'll be right back. Just need the bathroom. Dorenia can show you around." Then, she turned to her sister, "Show him where to get drinks and a seat." She closed the door behind her.
Dorenia pasted a smile on her face. "Follow me, please." She led him to another trailer where a man reading a newspaper sat outside next to a table piled with food. He had his feet propped up on the table and Nik let his eyes wander up his long legs and strong torso. Whoever he was, he certainly looked good.
People streamed in and out of the trailer, passing them without a word, apparently helping themselves to whatever was being served inside.
Dorenia grabbed two red plastic cups with some unknown liquid in it and passed one to Nik.
"Hey hey!" the man yelled, slapping his newspaper down on the table. "Not for the gadje!"
"Ma says it's fine," Dorenia said with a grimace.
"Yeah? Ma said that? Well I don't see her here, so I'm saying not so much." The man puffed out his chest and approached Nik. He stroked his thick goatee with two fingers and let out a chuckle. "A skinny city boy huh? Probably too weak to even put in a day’s work. What do you do, boy? You're probably, what, a secretary for some executive who thinks having a man work for them makes them progressive? Do you get all the benefits secretaries enjoy?" he smirked and eyed Nik suggestively.
"Riley, don't..." Vai's voice came as a warning from behind Nik, but before she could say anything else, the man stepped up close, his thick breath hot against Nik's face.
"What do you say, city boy? Are you a gadje faggot?"
Nik smiled. The day's revelations and emotions faded away. Clarity filled h
is mind as he looked into Riley's brown eyes.
"Yes," Nik said, "that's exactly what I am. I'm also the faggot who will lay you out if you don't get out of my face."
Riley pushed him in the chest and followed it up with a slam of his head against Nik's face.
Blood gushed from his nose, but he ignored it. He'd reset his nose so many times, sometimes he wondered if it would break just from rolling over in his sleep.
Nik's smile widened. He knew this. This pain, this blood. He knew how to handle this. It was everything else from earlier that had left him exhausted and overwhelmed, but the power swelling in his body as he prepared to slam his fists into this asshole's face filled him and pushed away all other thoughts.
Riley hesitated for a moment, giving Nik the perfect opening. He pulled back and then rammed his fist forward, punching through his opponent's face so hard the momentum pulled him a few steps forward.
He pivoted, ready for an attack, but found Riley laying on the ground, clutching his face. His breath came fast and the blood pumping through his body told him to attack, kill and destroy.
"Nik! He's human!" Vai called out, running over to him and placing a restraining hand against his chest.
"What the fuck!" Riley rolled onto his side and sat up, staring at Nik with one wide eye. The other swelled as he sat there, visibly turning darker shades of pink then purple. A slash split the skin across his cheek where Nik's knuckles had ripped his flesh.
"That's what you get for calling me a faggot," Nik spat, rage making his voice tremble.
Vai shoved Nik back a step before turning on the man bleeding on the ground. "You're such an idiot. What's wrong with you?"
"What's wrong with me? I'm the one bleeding all over the ground!" Riley stood on shaking legs.
A crowd had gathered around them. Nik felt their eyes on them, but he stood proud, determined to hold his own. If anyone else wanted a fight, he'd give it to them. After a moment, he relaxed, seeing not the expected anger or fear in their eyes, but laughter.
An older man walked up and put his arm around Nik's shoulder. "So, Ma says we're to make you at home, I hear. Looks like Riley got a good start on that," he laughed. The low chuckle turned into a bellow as he watched Riley poke gingerly at his injury. "A good fight is always a sign of good things to come!"
Vai sighed and rolled her eyes at Nik. "I don't know why I worried. You'll fit right in here if you talk to everyone fists first." She pointed to him. "Everyone, this is Nik. He's a Bino-Wuzhokh, like me."
"That's totally not a fair fight," Riley whined.
"Next time, pick on someone your own size, then." Nik winked at him, the unspent adrenaline turning from anger to enthusiastic playfulness.
Riley chuckled.
The man standing with Nik clapped him on the shoulder. "Then you are family, just as Ma said. Come sit with me. Leave Vai to tend to her fiancé’s injuries."
Nik looked to Vai and mouthed, Fiancé?
Vai glared before turning away and shoving Riley in the shoulder, saying something too low for Nik to hear, but he could imagine the gist of it. Something amounting to calling him a dumbass.
For having been insulted and bloodied, this wasn't such a bad party after all.
Nik sat next to the fire with the older man who'd taken him under his wing. A woman brought him a wet cloth and clucked her tongue at the mess he's made of his face and hands.
"Sorry," he muttered, wiping his face before leaning back and popping the cartilage of his nose back into place with a grunt.
"So, we have many things to thank you for it seems," the man said, gripping his knee with a strong hand. "You have brought Vai home and you have taught Riley some manners. As far as I'm concerned, you can move in tonight." He laughed again, his loud, riotous voice booming out over the fire.
The woman returned with two cups and took the cloth he'd used. She didn't say anything and in the darkness he couldn't tell how old she was, her long hair and loose clothing hid anything distinguishing about her. Nik didn't care for lemonade, but she was being polite. So he accepted his cup with gratitude.
"Once every month or so," the man explained, "we all gather here, or in one of the other circles. Everyone contributes something so that all of our people have plenty. If you want more to drink, you have only to ask. If you're hungry," he gestured to the house behind them, "ask. Everything is provided."
Dorenia unfolded a chair on the other side of the man and kissed him on the cheek before sitting.
"Ah, how are you tonight?" he asked.
"Good, Papa, it's a great night for a fire."
"You're Vai's father?" Nik asked.
He nodded and in the firelight Nik could see the same proud jawline and blue eyes of his friend.
Three kids came running, a girl and two boys. "Mama, mama! Lookit!" The little girl waved her stick with such enthusiasm that the hot marshmallow flew right off the end of it. It would have struck one of the boys in the face had he not raised his arm up in time to stop it.
"Queenie!" Dorina scolded as she jumped up to help the boy, now wailing his burning misery. She moved quickly, but maintained a level of calm that bordered between impressive and scary, as only a mother can. She pulled a small pack of wet wipes from her pocket and pulled the marshmallow off the crying child's arm. When she got most of the marshmallow off, she stuffed the wipe back into her pocket.
Dorenia admonished the girl in a language Nik couldn't decipher, and the child apologized. They hugged, and Vai's sister, with a kiss atop each dark head, sent them back to play. She glanced at Nik with a bemused grin and gave a quick shrug. "Kids." She took her seat again.
Behind them, the door from one of the trailers opened forcefully, banging against the side. Two more boys ran down the steps and out past Dorenia, one squealing, "You're it!" A man followed them out and shut the door.
He walked toward them, grabbing an empty chair on his way and set it down next to Dorenia. When he saw Nik, he froze.
"And just who might you be?" His deep voice reverberated the air between them. With his back to the campfire, the only source of light, his dark eyes looked completely black. His bulk mostly in shadow, he struck a menacing figure.
Dorenia rolled her eyes, and, despite looking so different, reminded him of Vai. "Landin, this is Nikolai Grekh. Vai brought him. Ma gave him permission to stay." She raised her eyebrows and nodded slightly. "And since you missed it, he already sent Riley to the ground, so please keep your fists to yourself?"
Landin took his seat without another word but kept an eye on Nik when he thought no one would notice.
Nik always noticed.
What was it about these guys, always looking for a fight? It reminded him of the group homes he'd stayed at a few times. He'd never been there long, but he knew from other kids it could get brutal. Some of the boys who came to live in his half-way house had never known anything but those places.
Nik felt like he was in another world. A stereotype from a time long gone, when community was family and sticking together meant safety. As strange as it was, he watched and listened and laughed and found himself relaxing; happy to be there.
Until Vai stormed up to the group, calling over her shoulder, "Will you drop it, Riley?"
"Trouble with the Mrs.?" Nik asked.
If Vai had been intimidating before, she was downright terrifying when she looked at him. "Shut it, Nik."
"Vai, we have to talk," Riley demanded, stomping across the clearing.
"I don't have to do shit."
"Vai!" her father admonished. Every single person within the vicinity bowed their head and stopped speaking. Other than the oblivious children playing around the fire, this man had silenced an entire gathering of Romani with one word.
"These are private matters, they will be discussed in private."
"Papa," Vai implored.
"No, no more." He slammed his fist down on his thigh and glared at her.
Vai held his gaze long enough that even Nik began t
o feel uncomfortable. Eventually, she lowered her eyes and nodded.
The air around the fire remained strained, full of electricity and unspoken frustration. The man with the guitar strummed a few notes, replacing the tension with melody. Soon the laughter of the children infected the adults and all traces of Vai's humiliation disappeared.
Chapter Seven
She swallowed her pride for the moment, but glared at Riley when she spoke. "I need to get Nik settled in at the Hernes' place. If you want to talk, we can do so there."
Nik kind-of felt sorry for Riley. He couldn't imagine having to put up with someone as headstrong as Vai. Zeph had his moments, but everyone had a breaking point. He had learned to control his temper, for the most part. He was almost as good at pushing down his anger as Nik was at pushing down his lust for the man.
Nik followed Vai and Riley around the campfire. Dorenia walked next to Vai, chatting about the various goings-on she'd missed since the last time she'd visited the community. Riley and Landin stayed just behind them, sharing a comfortable silence. Nik had never felt more alone.
They turned away from the common area, faced the woods, and marched between two houses, following a path between trees. At the end of the path, five small houses identical in appearance formed a half-circle around them, with the path they emerged from the only entrance or exit. The tree line butted up against the houses and they sat so close together that the only clear patch of land was a barren circle in the middle.
Nik stopped a moment to stare at the odd scene. A little homemade cul-de-sac, built right into the landscape.
Riley leaned close to Vai, but she jerked away from him. He sighed and said, "I'll meet you there." Then he entered the second house from the left.
Landin scratched the thick, curly patch of hair at the nape of his neck and wore a lopsided grin. "Well, I'm off to bed. Dorenia, you'll go for the little ones?"
She shook her head no, her expression too calm and wise for the boisterous, young woman. "They will stay with Elikia tonight. I'll be home shortly." He turned right and entered the house opposite the one Riley had gone into.