I’m taking a much needed study break. Bio is killing me. The ridiculous thing is no one else seems to be struggling. I keep telling myself it’s the only science class I have to take, but it doesn’t make it any easier. I’m sitting here with about 400 flashcards scattered all over the place. At least Alaina (my roommate) is still out with Andrew (his actual name is Tommy, but he’ll always be Andrew to me) tonight. Otherwise she’d be yelling at me to turn off the light. Turns out they didn’t wait until Friday. Works for me, and it means I can study late into the night. Fun times all around.
Annabelle sounds lovely. I’m glad you’ve found someone there to talk to. I kind of have, but it’s a love-hate kind of thing. I wish I could tell you more about it, but I can’t yet, so for now, he’ll remain a mystery. And before you ask (although you never pry, so I suppose maybe you wouldn’t have), it’s not someone I’m dating or sleeping with or anything like that, although my mom probably wishes I would. He’s one of those people I was supposed to join the sorority to meet. He’s helping me steer around the iceberg, or at least slow down the boat so I can figure out a new plan. I’ve told him about you. He told me to be careful because I seem to care about you too much. How can you care about someone too much? I can see a problem with too little, but too much? He says one day I’ll understand, but right now I don’t. Maybe it’s weird that I talk about you to everyone here, but I’ve never pretended to be normal. I mean I can play the part. You’d half believe it when I dress up and go out with friends, but inside I’ll always be a little bit off.
I took the plunge and submitted a few poems to a lit mag. I’m sure they won’t make the cut, but it would be cool to get some of my words out there. I’ll let you know what happens. I’m sure you’re sitting at the edge of your seat.
Speaking of the edge of a seat… funny you should bring up It. I finally watched the whole thing earlier today. My RA had it on in the common room. That might be another reason I’m up late tonight.
Tightrope walkers would have been cool, but in my dream we were lion tamers. It was a good dream at first until the all-white lion tried to attack me. You started talking to it, and it listened and it didn’t eat me. It seems like a pretty easy dream to interpret. I view you as a protector. The dream wasn’t completely out of the blue. I had it right after we watched my favorite circus related movie. I still think the book was better, but that’s the truth most of the time, isn’t it?
My cell is the same number with a 706 area code now. I switched it when I started getting all these strange crank calls. I called and they happened to have my number with the new area code. Is yours still the same?
I’m not running away, I’m coming home,
Fern
13
September 12
Subject: Eagerly waiting on the edge of my seat.
You're right, I did think you were drunk when I first started reading your email. I think your name fits you too. Fern is a delicate foliage, and you've always seemed delicate to me. Maybe that’s because you're short and petite. I don’t know. Although, I do know you well enough to know if I were standing beside you and said that, you’d kick my ass.
You've definitely got that, “Looks can be deceiving” sort of thing going for you. Deep down I know you’re tough as nails.
I feel your pain when it comes to bio. We all have that one class that kicks our ass while we're down and refuses to let us up. You'll figure it out, though. You always did in high school. Glad your roommate situation worked out for the better too.
Annabelle is pretty cool, although she does have some strange tendencies. I swear it feels like she's stepped out of the past sometimes and hasn’t had a chance to catch up with the future yet. We’re not really dating, but we did go for coffee the other night. Have I said she’s mentioned she likes my eyes too? At least I inherited something from my dad that was worth a shit.
How about this guy you seem to be having a love-hate relationship with? I'm not sure I like the sound of him. My mom gave me a really good piece of advice one time, and I'm going to pass it along to you: Anyone who has your head and heart flip-flopping back and forth so much isn't worth your damn time.
That's what she told me the night she finally gained enough courage to leave my dad. It's always stuck with me. Now maybe it will stick with you too.
I'm glad the guy is helping you steer around your iceberg, but him telling you to be careful because you seem to care about me too much...That seems weird. I'm right there with you. How can a person care too much about someone? Normally, the problem is they care too little. Most people are selfish. It's human nature, I guess.
You are normal, Fern. You're the most normal girl I've ever met. I've never thought of you as being off. Then again, maybe it's because I'm slightly off myself. We make a good pair.
So you finally decided to become a true author and share your words with the world? I'm proud of you, but what's with the negative Nancy crap? You've got to think positive. I believe in you. That's gotta count for something, right?
I'm no dream interpreter, but I had a slightly different take on your dream then you did. To me it didn't mean you see me as a protector, it meant you see us both as being pretty badass. I mean, come on. Lion tamers? I don't know why it started to attack you, or why on earth it would have listened to me talk, but the entire dream sounds pretty cool. I was worried it would be something about you dreaming we boarded a plane that blew up mid-flight, killing everyone on board including us, and somehow you talked me into getting off the plane before takeoff. Then I would say you have a desire to cheat death, which is bad because in the end it always comes for you. But lion tamers? That’s just cool. Maybe this is what our children's book should be about–The Adventures of Holder and Fern. I can see each of those scenes illustrated in my head. Now, when do you plan on telling me another dream?
My cell number is the same as it always was. I doubt I'll ever change it because I happen to like prank calls. Even the telemarketer ones.They allow me to work on my British accent when I answer.
Cheerio,
Holder
P.S. Your RA and I would get along. He’s got great taste in movies.
14
September 13
Subject: Breaking the 4th wall
Holder,
I always liked Final Destination. It’s freaky, I won’t deny that, but it’s also very satisfying. You can spend hours analyzing it and coming up with scenarios of how death can catch up to you. And am I the only one who freaks out when I’m stuck behind a truck with big pieces of lumber or logs on the back? The sequel always comes back to me inducing mild panic.
I am going to assume you are joking about the loving prank calls thing, but in case you aren’t, let me know. I’ll be sure to put your number in lots of interesting places on campus. We both know you need more practice with that accent.
I like your mom’s advice. I agree with her. I have no plans to date this guy or anything, but I can’t exactly cut him out of my life either. We’re linked together whether I like it or not. Annabelle sounds interesting, and even if she’s old fashioned she knows a good pair of eyes when she sees them. A more important question: How does she take her coffee? That can tell you a lot about a person.
Ok, you ready for another dream? This one is, uh, different. In dream number two we were at work watching Fear because there were absolutely no customers. Yes, I know we never watched Fear together, but we did in my dream, so stay with me. Anyway, while we were watching, Mark Wahlberg broke the fourth wall and started talking to us, telling us we should come in and join the movie. We acted the way you’d think we’d act. We laughed uncomfortably and tried to turn off the movie. It wouldn’t turn off. He asked us if either of us wanted to jump in. You said you’d always wanted to meet Alyssa Milano and said yes.
I tried to stop you, I mean she is way too old for you anyway, and Fear isn’t really a fun movie to be inside of, but you wouldn’t listen. I wanted to stay back, but I didn’t. I followed you a
nd stepped into that ancient TV behind the desk. That’s when the dream ended. Weird huh? I’m not even going to pretend to interpret that one. It was plain old weird. But now that I know you’re kind of seeing this girl in her 20s, maybe that older girl thing has new meaning? Not that it’s any of my business of course…
Do you guys have a fall break? Ours times up with Halloween this year. Maybe a road trip can be worked into my schedule?
It could have all been different,
Fern
P.S. I passed my bio quiz!
P.P.S. Creamy chicken ramen is actually pretty good.
15
September 14
Subject: Brick Dust
I think it's safe to say anyone who’s ever seen that movie freaks out when they get stuck behind a log truck. I know I sure as hell do.
Are you in a cult now, Fern? You say you're linked to this guy whether you like it or not? What's that supposed to mean? Did you join some sort of secret society by blood and now you can’t get free? Sounds a little sketchy to me. I won't pry if you tell me not to, but the more you say about your relationship with him, the more creeped out I get.
It's funny you ask how Annabelle takes her coffee. We went out again last night, and this time I happened to notice. The answer: Black. She takes her coffee black. What does that tell you about her? I'm curious because sometimes I get weird vibes from her, but maybe it’s because she’s so different from anyone I’ve ever met before. Also, I have a pretty good imagination and I’m running on no sleep lately. My roommate has a cold, and he’s been sawing logs every night for the past week because of it.
Yeah, your dream is pretty out there. I've got nothing when it comes to that one.
Switching subjects...I start my new job in two nights. Maybe I’ll have some cool ghost stories for you in a few emails. I’ve been trying to Google places around here that might be on my walking tour but haven’t had much luck. I wonder how much of the crap I’ll be reciting nightly will be total bullshit. I’m hoping there will be some truth to it but who knows. I’m supposed to take the tour with a group of customers on night one and take mental notes so I can see “how it’s done”. Could be fun, though. Maybe I’ll learn about houses with hidden rooms in their attics and the Hoodoo practitioners who lived there. Don’t worry, I’ll carry some brick dust in my pocket just in case.
I think our fall breaks line up. You should definitely take a trip to visit me. There’s so much in this city we can do on Halloween. Congrats on passing your bio quiz. Told you creamy chicken was good, glad you tried it. Hate to seem like I’m rushing this email, but Annabelle is supposed to be here soon. She’s taking me to some secret place she thought I might enjoy tonight. All she would tell me about it is that I won’t find it on any map, and there’s a password we have to say at the door. I’m intrigued.
Gotta run,
Holder
16
September 14
Subject: Don’t panic
Secret place? And you’re worried I’m in a cult? She’s not taking you to a sex club or anything is she? Not that I’ve ever been to one, but I assume it would require a password. In all seriousness, I expect a complete report tomorrow. But that probably means I need to be more honest with you. How about an IOU? I’ll tell you everything when I see you. I’m kind of afraid of how you’re going to take it, and I need to see your face. I don’t want you to freak out and disappear on me. You’d miss me too much. Or ok, I’d miss you too much. Maybe we’d both miss each other too much? Yes. Let’s go with that one.
Are you excited to start the new job? I bet you’re going to be awesome at it. Even if you do insist on using a fake British accent.
Black coffee, hmm? That usually means she’s mature and serious. So, no sex club then. Maybe be more worried about getting locked in a panic room or something. Remember what happened to Kristen Stewart’s character in that movie? But then again, she may also drink black coffee to save on the calories so it’s hard to know. I guess what I’m saying is the whole “you can tell a lot…” thing is really just something that sounds cool. You’ll have to let me know.
Any suggestions for places I can stay if I visit? Can you have girls stay over in your dorm?
Off to study for my Spanish test. Hope you have fun tonight.
Adios,
Fern
17
September 15
Subject: Call me Rip Van Winkle
I figured you would want me to report back after that email. I guess I have all the time in the world now that I slept an entire day away and missed all my damn classes. No, I wasn’t out super late with Annabelle either. I'm blaming this on my roommate. I think I caught his sickness.
Nope. The place wasn't anything as cool as a sex club would’ve been. It was still sort of cool, though. Did you know there’s a secret vampire bar In Savannah? Well, there is. They have the secret part down, but I'm not so sure about the vampire. I honestly don't think there was a single vampire in the entire place. If there was, I'm sure they were appalled by the amount of girls dressed in crushed velvet gowns wearing black lipstick. I know I was.
Might be a cool place to apply to for a job if this ghost tour gig doesn't work out. Those girls would go nuts over a handsome man like myself taking their drink orders. Throw a little glitter on me, give me a few seconds to perfect my brooding look, and I'm sure I could have them all eating out of the palm of my hand before my shift was over. Worked for you, didn't it? The whole sparkly vampire thing?
I'm joking. Don't punch me the next time you see me. I know how much you liked that movie.
In all seriousness though, the place was definitely something worth experiencing. Maybe if you visit during break I'll take you there. You'd probably love the place. All of their drinks referenced popular vampire movies. Annabelle didn't get some of them, all right most of them, but in her defense she did say she doesn't watch much TV or go to the movies. I guess not everyone can be big movie buffs like us, right?
I am excited to start my new job. Telling ghost stories all night and getting paid for it seems like the best job ever.
Man. I should probably go. I can barely keep my eyes open. I slept twelve hours straight, but I guess it wasn't enough.
Holder
P.S. You can stay with me when you visit. My residence hall is coed, and I don't give a shit what my roommate says. I think he gave me the bubonic plague, so allowing you to stay a few days is the least he can do.
P.S.S. I’d never freak out and disappear on you, Fern. You know me better than that. No matter what you tell me, I’ll always be here for you.
18
September 16
Subject: Stay away from Frank
Hey Holder,
I hope you’re feeling better today. Sounds like the flu or something. Are you drinking lots of fluids? Do I need to send you chicken soup? Being sick away from home stinks, doesn’t it? There’s no one to take care of you. Get over this soon because I’m visiting you over break. I’m going to wait and tell my mom when I’m on the road. She’s been even more pushy lately about things. She knows I’m not interested in the things she wants me to be interested in, and it’s killing her.
I don’t mind the Twilight jokes as much as I used to. I still love the movies, don’t get me wrong, but I understand that whether the vampires should sparkle or not has nothing to do with why I like them. It really all comes down to the side characters for me.
I’m excited to see you for Halloween. It’s always a fun holiday even if I don’t know what to dress up as. I’ve changed my mind about ten times already. I guess it’s fine as long as I don’t dress up as a demonic rabbit. Ever wonder what it would be like to time travel? I do, but I don’t really get physics enough to understand how it would work. One of these days I’ll find a science that I actually get. I got a B- on my last bio Quiz. That’s way better than the C I got last time. Ever think I’d be happy with a B-? Me neither, but I guess that’s what college is about, resetting your expe
ctations.
Potions & Fangs: Vampire Emails #1 Page 3