by Layla Nash
“I wouldn’t dream of inconveniencing my brother,” Faros said, and almost managed to say it like he meant it.
Frrar bristled, his jaw aching as he clenched it, but he swallowed down before he said something he regretted in front of Maisy.
The security chief frowned in his direction before he turned his attention back to the pirate. “I’ll speak with Vaant about it. We can ask for volunteers from the crew, but I don’t know if there will be interest.”
“I’ll go,” someone said, and Frrar went still.
It couldn’t be.
But there was Maisy, still rummaging through one of the bins full of supplies along the wall, glancing over her shoulder at all of them as if it were the most normal thing in the entire universe for her to say. “I’ll volunteer.”
“No,” Frrar and Vrix said at the same time, and her expression darkened.
“I beg your pardon?”
Instead of growling and ordering her to stand down, like he would have before he met his mate, Vrix took a deep breath and shook his head. “You shouldn’t, Maisy. It is a very dangerous mission, and that ship is... not the same as the Galaxos.”
Half of Faros’s mouth quirked up in a smile as he studied the young doctor. “There are no females on my ship, Doctor.”
She didn’t look impressed. “Then maybe that’s why it’s falling apart and you’re all in such bad shape.”
Frrar laughed, though he snapped his mouth shut when Maisy scowled at him next. Faros eased to his feet, ignoring his brother, and loomed over the Earther. “Make no mistake, I’d be very happy to have you aboard. I would not want your mate to be concerned about your safety.”
“No mate,” she said brusquely, snapping off her gloves and storming back across the room. “I make my own decisions.”
Frrar’s heart sank as he saw the spark of interest in all three of the pirates, and he wanted to shake the woman until she understood what she’d just said. She’d declared herself available to all of them, and invited herself into a warriors’ den with only unmated males. It would be a miracle if anyone but her survived the trip.
Vrix cleared his throat. “That’s not a good idea. Faros, we will discuss it with the captain. He will want more information on your planned mission and timeline, and we’ll need more information on the neutral ships that you say attacked you.”
Faros leaned back on the gurney, apparently content to sit back. “I’m happy to share whatever details will be helpful.”
Vrix grunted, unimpressed, and shared a dark look with Frrar as the security chief headed for the hall and the bridge. Frrar knew he wasn’t leaving Maisy alone with the pirates for a second. There was a distinct possibility that Faros would just steal her and disappear back out into space without another word. Not that Frrar would necessarily blame him—if Frrar had his own pirate ship at the ready, he might have been tempted to do the same.
For her part, though, Maisy looked pretty fierce as she prepared some of the medical devices on the other side of the room from the Xaravians, her back to all of them. “There are two doctors on this ship, and Mrax should stay, since he was here first.”
“Mrax knows more about fixing Xaravians,” Frrar said. He didn’t want to argue with her in front of his brother and the other two pirates, but he wasn’t about to let her think her leaving the Galaxos was actually a possibility. There was no way in all the deserts of Xarav that he’d let her disappear with his brother. “It would be better, if anyone wants to go on the suicide mission with these... pirates, that it be Mrax.”
She gave him a cold look, but there was something about the soft skin around her eyes that made him think there was something else going on underneath the anger. Fear, maybe. He wasn’t adept at reading the Earthers. They made it so difficult, with their skin only staying one color.
Faros crossed his long legs on the gurney and studied where the wound regenerators worked on his shoulder and side. “I’m sure Mrax isn’t anywhere near as beautiful as you, Doc.”
More color bloomed in her cheeks, but she didn’t dignify the comment with a response as she finished restocking the cupboard. She headed for the door instead, her tone indifferent. “I’ll see if there’s anything edible in the galley. Try not to create any more wounds while I’m gone.”
Frrar stepped aside to let her pass, baring his teeth as all three of the pirates watched her go with a bit too much interest, and he fixed his brother with the most threatening look he could muster. At least Faros rolled his eyes and redirected his attention to the ceiling. “And so here we are, brother.”
Frrar clenched his jaw and braced himself for a really unpleasant conversation. He didn’t think they’d be able to follow Maisy’s directions about the wounds.
Chapter 5
Maisy
Maisy barely kept her composure as she fled the sick bay, certain that one of the Xaravians would come after her and try to either talk her into or out of what she’d just said. The rational part of her brain screamed that it was crazy, that she absolutely should never even consider going anywhere with a bunch of terrifying giant Xaravian pirates. The rational part of her brain vehemently agreed with both Vrix and Frrar on what a terrible idea it was, how dangerous it would be, how questionable the pirates actually were... She shook herself and kept up a quick pace to the canteen so she wouldn’t turn on her heel, reverse course, and go to take back what she’d said.
She’d volunteered to go with them.
She had. Maisy. Responsible, clever Maisy. Studious, diligent, boring Maisy, who never went to parties at the Academy and was always afraid of heights and taking physical risks and turned in every assignment a few days early, just in case. Law-abiding Maisy, who’d never broken a rule or even really bent one. That Maisy had just volunteered to be a ship’s doctor to rebel pirates. Pirates.
She laughed in disbelief and ignored the sideways look from one of the younger Xaravians. Just what Maisy needed—rumors about her being crazy spreading through the Galaxos and the pirate ship. Even if she started to believe it herself.
No one else was in the canteen, the small cafe where the crew could get snacks and drinks if they didn’t want to go to the mess hall—which wasn’t really a mess hall like they’d had on the Argo. It was just a larger room with better robots for ordering and preparing bigger meals. It was just as rattletrap as the rest of the Galaxos, which hadn’t been much improved in any meaningful way even after Trazzak and Jess brought back the ridiculous amount of money the Alliance had been willing to pay as Jess’s bounty.
Maisy fiddled with the ordering console to survey the options as she pondered. Everyone had been very hush-hush about why Jess’s bounty was so enormous, particularly when it was pretty well known what the rest of the bounties would be. No one told Maisy anything, and when she’d asked Griggs and Isla what happened, they just mumbled about special circumstances and changed the subject. She didn’t know if they just didn’t trust her with the information, or if they wanted to protect her from some ugly truths. Maisy didn’t need to be protected from things like that. She was a Fleet officer and a doctor and saved lives. Having to confront some of the not-nice sides to the Alliance and maybe even some of her friends was fine. She could handle it.
Well, she was mostly sure she could handle it.
She selected a hot chocolate, since she’d been craving it and they’d finally restocked with actual Earth chocolate at one of the way stations, and some of those awful Xaravian snacks that were miraculously always available on the Galaxos. They’d run out of shampoo and soap and dishes and serviceable uniforms and all the engineering crap that Rowan needed to keep the ship flying, but somehow the stinky rotting cabbage and fermented nastiness were always available. When the stores got to be half-full, it was an emergency requiring an immediate detour.
Not when no one could get clean or had actual uniforms to wear—no, that wasn’t an emergency or even a higher priority. Just when the garlic and eye-watering red paste supply had a dent in it.
>
Maisy frowned into the hot chocolate as she eased onto a battered metal chair to wait for the conveyor to spit out the small dishes of stomach-turning food. But chances were that was all they’d have to eat on the pirate ship, so she’d have to suck it up and eat the stuff or bring her own supply of dehydrated meal replacements. She’d survived on that for long periods of time before, especially at the Academy and during medical school when she was too busy studying and doing rounds to eat. She made a note on her mental checklist to visit the stockroom or at least ping the quartermaster on what kind of dehydrated replacements they had and how much of them were available to take with her.
She finally began to enjoy her hot chocolate, pushing away some of the panic of her rash decision. Maybe Vaant would refuse to let any of the Galaxos crew go with the pirates, and she wouldn’t have to worry about retracting her willingness to volunteer. It had to be really dangerous to go running around with pirates. And if she wanted to be taken seriously as an officer equal to everyone else, then she needed to think rationally and logically about her decisions and how they would affect the rest of the crew. She couldn’t just go following every whim and thought that sparked in front of her. Newton’s laws, what had she been thinking?
Maisy ran her finger around the edge of the mug. But then... The way Faros had looked at her, like he really saw her... Sure, maybe he was just one of those Xaravians who was intrigued by an Earther woman without scales or horns—but maybe he saw her real medical skills and knew she’d be an asset for his ship.
She’d dealt with boorish males of all species at the Academy, and treated all manner of patients during her residency. She could handle them well enough. Maybe the pirate ship was the only real place Maisy could spread her wings and find her own path, away from the protective arms of her shipmates. She started to chuckle, picturing the reaction when any of the other Earthers heard Maisy volunteered.
But then she paused, her finger still on the mug. Of course, Faros was supposed to be Frrar’s brother, and yet it was clear the engineer did not think highly of the other warrior. It looked instead as if they’d almost come to blows right in the middle of the sick bay. Normally Frrar was even-keeled, if a little chaotic and prone to making crazy engineering decisions that could blow things up. He didn’t like testing any of his inventions since he just assumed they would work, but he’d never really been emotional about anything. Not that any of the Xaravians were. Still, if Frrar hated his brother, there had to be a reason. Which meant it was likely something Faros had done, which meant Faros might not be the kind of captain she wanted to serve with.
Maisy put her head in her hands. She really wished she could be like Isla or Griggs or Rowan or Jess and just make a decision. Griggs didn’t think twice before she took action. She just acted. Maisy debated with herself and made checklists and pros and cons lists and researched and pondered and it took forever.
Not that randomly jumping into trouble even made sense.
She groaned and rubbed her temples. She needed help. Serious help. There had to be a syndrome or some kind of treatment for the kind of mental gymnastics she put herself through.
Which she could certainly research.
Maisy pushed to her feet to gather up the giant bowls of stinky food so she could transport it back to sick bay in the hopes that Faros and Frrar hadn’t destroyed the entire room, but froze when the doors to the canteen opened. Isla and Griggs stormed in, Jess wandering in on their heels even though she should have been preparing to leave for Dablon Seven.
Maisy braced for a whole lot of yelling, and Isla did not disappoint. She planted herself between Maisy and the doors, fixed a scowl on her face that would have made any of the Xaravians cower, and jabbed her finger right in Maisy’s solar plexus. “You are not going anywhere with those pirates, do you hear me? Have you lost your mind? They’re pirates. And there are only males on that ship. You’ll be the only female. There will be no one to protect you, no one to make sure you’re treated well, no one to help you. Nothing.”
And all reason fled once more as emotion took over and Maisy found herself looming over Isla and shouting right back in her face. “I don’t need someone to protect me or help me or make sure I’m treated a certain way. I can do that. I’m a Fleet officer, just the same as you, and I’m a medical doctor and the youngest graduate of the Fleet medical school. Do you not remember that?”
Isla blinked, stumped, then her face flushed bright red and almost purple. “You’re young, Maisy, and you don’t know what it will be like with all those males. You don’t have as much experience and you’re just not ready to be on a solo trip, so—”
“I’m not that much younger than you,” Maisy said. She put the chocolate down before she dropped or threw it, and folded her arms over her chest to protect the rest of her anatomy from Isla’s poking and snapping. “And we were both on our first tour with the Argo. And yet somehow we’ve both survived. Or are those facts irrelevant to the situation at hand?”
Jess started to smile as she eased to sit in one of the battered chairs, though she covered her mouth so Isla and Griggs wouldn’t see.
As Isla floundered and tried to come up with a response, Griggs held her hands up to get Maisy’s attention—and instead of yelling, she used that damn “older sister trying to be mother” tone that made Maisy want to scream “You’re not the boss of me!” and stomp her feet.
“Look, Maisy. It’s going to be a dangerous mission, more so than anything you’ve done.”
“It’s not more dangerous than what you’ve done,” Maisy said. She had no idea where the words and argument and attitude were coming from. It felt like an out-of-body experience, like she was floating over her own body and watching gleefully as Bold Maisy took over. “You went racing down to a hostile planet to save a friend and got captured by slavers. We all escaped the Xaravians on a spaceport and then had to defend the spaceport against the Alliance, and we watched a bunch of innocent lifeforms get killed because of it. I’ve seen the ugly stuff, Cici. I’ve been up to my elbows in body parts, definitely more than you have. I know what happens. I want to do this. I want to go. And don’t think you’re going to stop me.”
Isla shook her head over and over. “No. I’m talking to Vaant. He’ll forbid it; this is his ship. And I’m your ranking officer, so you have to obey—”
“We’re not in the Fleet anymore,” Jess said quietly. She watched Maisy with a knowing look in her eyes, and Maisy swallowed a sudden knot of gratitude that formed in her throat. She’d expected the mysterious cultural attaché to side with the others, but Jess had changed since she’d gotten back from being kidnapped by the Alliance. There was a quiet peace about her, something almost Zen and in-line with the universe that was immensely comforting to be around. “So... I’m not sure we have ranking officers anymore.”
Isla’s face turned even more purple, until Maisy started to worry about her blood pressure. “You’re not helping, Barnes.”
Jess snorted, shaking her head. “Don’t use my last name and expect me to give a shit, Isla. And I’m not trying to help. I’m trying to point out the relevant facts. Maisy is a grown-ass adult, a medical doctor, and yes, a former Fleet officer. Would you stop her if she wanted to go set up shop on a distant colony and tend booboos and owies on a frontier for the rest of her life?”
“No, because that wouldn’t be a stupid risk—like volunteering to join a pirate ship.”
Jess’s lips compressed in a thin line like she struggled not to laugh. Before she could go on, Maisy cleared her throat. “Thank you, Jess, but I want to fight my own battles now.”
Jess inclined her head and stepped back, ceding the floor, which only made Maisy more grateful and more emotional. Which she hated—she always ended up crying when she got too mad or frustrated or happy or anything, really. If she could keep her emotions between four and six on a ten-point scale, she was okay. Anything more or less than those... she was crying.
Maisy took a deep breath and focused
on sounding confident. “I am tired of being sheltered and treated like I’m somehow your kid sister that needs to be protected. I’m not your little sister. I’m not even really your friend, since you don’t treat me like an equal.”
Griggs’s expression fell. “Honey, of course you’re—”
“I’m not,” Maisy said. “Not really. Because neither of you trusted me with the facts behind why Jess’s bounty was so huge. And you didn’t want me to risk going to Dablon Seven to help get her back. And you don’t include me in any of the big planning efforts for our missions. So they’re not really our missions, they’re your missions and I’m just tagging along. Well, I’m tired of tagging along and being treated like some kind of... some kind of medical robot you can order around and then turn off and send into the corner when I’m done stitching you all up. I’m done.”
“That’s not how we feel at all, Maisy. It’s not—” Isla started, moving forward like she meant to hug Maisy.
Maisy stepped back, holding her hands up to fend her off. She didn’t want to be distracted, and if Isla hugged her, chances were pretty good Maisy would burst into tears from frustration and anger and then it would all be over. They’d never take her seriously again. “That’s how I feel. You’re all stifling me here. I’m stifling on the Galaxos and the Hawking. I’m going with the other ship when they leave on their mission.”
Isla looked suddenly tired, shaking her head. “If you won’t listen to me, you’ll have to listen to Vaant. He won’t let you go with Faros and the others. He won’t. It just isn’t safe, and we can’t risk losing you.”
“If you tell him not to let me go because you think you know better than me what risks I’m willing to take, I will never forgive you.” Maisy’s voice cracked and she hated every second of it, but she met Isla’s gaze and hoped the other woman believed her. “I will never forgive you. And I will leave anyway.”