The stress of the day has taken its toll, and a huge wave of exhaustion smothers me, I fall asleep quickly.
Zane is packing his belongings neatly in a large burgundy cloth bag. He retrieves a black weatherproof jacket from the back of his wardrobe and pulls his arms through before zipping it tightly in place. He pulls a black woollen hat down over his hair and secures it firmly over his ears. He places his laptop in a separate black leather bag that he wraps around one shoulder. He carefully scrutinizes his surroundings before leaving his apartment. As he gets into the van, he turns and looks up at the starry sky. “Ari, I’ll see you soon,” he says, as he blows a kiss into the dark night.
This is the first night the dreams don’t interrupt my sleep and I wake feeling refreshed for a change. I vividly recall the details and waste no time in whispering them to Cal. I wonder what Zane’s definition of ‘soon’ is, I hope it’s the same as mine.
***
Eventually, the last day of the pageant arrives and I’m thrilled at the prospect of going home soon. Fenuka mistakes my enthusiasm as excitement for the Silentium Ball and I don’t correct her—let the authorities believe it so. We have one final dance rehearsal, and we’ve perfected the routine at this stage. We’re performing a Latina inspired salsa dance that’s very sensual.
Cal goes for a run while I mentally prepare myself for the obligatory pampering.
After the requisite beautification, I’m ready to get dressed. My hair is pinned up in a classical style, and my make-up coordinates perfectly. Fenuka unzips the bag containing my dress, and I clap in delight as it’s revealed.
I didn’t think Fenuka could trump the dress she created for the Suitors Ball, but she has. The dress is vibrant red chiffon that falls in wispy horizontal layers from my waist down to my feet. The top half of the dress is ruched and fitted securely over my bust, the straps go around my neck, and criss-cross down my back, stopping appropriately before I could be declared indecent. The neckline is adorned with a line of diamante crystals that sparkle and shine iridescently. My accessories perfectly match, and the overall look is visually stunning. “Fenuka, I love it, but I’m a bit worried about our dance. What if I trip and make a total show of myself?”
“I’ve created another dress for you to dance in, here let me show you,” she says as she goes into the back of the wardrobe and comes out with a beautiful short black dress. The material is slinky, and I can see that it will flow naturally with the lines of my body as I dance. She assures me that she’ll be there to help me get changed, so I relax.
Cal is wearing a stunning black tuxedo, and he looks classically handsome. Fenuka quickly frogmarches us out of the suite into the elevator, and I brace myself for the night ahead.
The champagne is flowing, and I readily accept the glass that’s offered to me, a little dutch courage never hurt anyone. The room is decorated extravagantly as expected. There must be at least three hundred people here, and I notice many of the VIPs mingling with some of the other couples. There are various camera crews manning the room. I spy Zolt Rada conversing with Lainey and Tristan from Storm. Lainey is wearing an ill-advised black strapless fitted dress in a fishtail silhouette. I stifle a laugh as I see her try to walk in it, she’s clearly struggling to stay upright. Couldn’t happen to a nicer person, I smirk to myself.
The dance performances go in Region order, so we’re second, after Tana and Evoy from Illumina. I’m glad to be getting it out of the way relatively early. Fenuka helps us get changed, and we’re ready just as our names are announced. As the music begins to play Cal pulls me in tight to his body and winks. We start into our routine and expertly maneuver our way across the dance floor. We’re perfectly in sync, so I let myself relax and fully immerse myself in the dance. I hear gasps from the audience as Cal leans me back while I raise my leg up and over his torso and we spin around and around to the beat of the song. I’m pleasantly surprised to find that I’m actually enjoying it, but that’s thanks to Cal, as he locks eyes with me the whole time. It’s easy to forget the crowd and pretend that it’s only the two of us together in this moment of intimacy. We finish to rapturous applause and Fenuka is gushing in her praise.
I accept another glass of champagne and settle down at our table to watch the rest of the performances. Once all the couples are finished the band starts playing, and everyone takes to the dancefloor. We put on amorous displays every time the camera turns in our direction.
Finally, Zolt Rada steps up to the podium to announce the first ever Novo Silentium Couple. We act numb with shock initially when our names are called out and then bounce happily up towards the stage to receive congratulations and details of our wedding prize. My face hurts from all the fake smiling, and my head hurts with the realization of what’s to come. Everyone wants a photo taken with the couple of the moment, and it takes hours to escape.
Back in our suite, I hastily pull off my dress and scrub the make-up from my face. Cal is waiting with a cup of hot chocolate when I come out into the living area. “I can’t wait to get home,” he says.
“Me too, but I wonder what’s in store for us once we’re back.”
“I guess we’ll find out soon enough.”
I let out a huge yawn as tiredness catches up with me. “I’m shattered,” I say sleepily as I kiss him lightly and head for bed. I’m only barely under the covers when I hear his knock on the door.
“I can’t be without you tonight,” he says. I retract the covers to signal my consent. He gets in and wraps his arms around me and I fall asleep against the warmth emanating from his body.
Zane is wearing a Novo issue military uniform underneath his black jacket. He’s strapped securely into a plastic moulded seat, on a row, that is mounted to the side of the stealth-craft. Beside and across from him sit several other men and women. No one’s talking and all display wearisome expressions. He takes the photo of me from his jacket pocket and stares at it before planting a gentle kiss on the paper.
Fenuka comes into my room, bright and early, to wake me. I can tell she’s unhappy at the sight of Cal lying in my bed. She doesn’t say anything, but I can feel her displeasure lacing the air. We’re being interviewed by Dolores Lambten this morning before we begin the journey back home to Aqua. I force my fatigued body into a seated position and lightly shake Cal to wake him. He immediately reaches out for me, but I push him away and using my hands, I turn his face around, so he sees Fenuka standing disapprovingly in the corner of the room. He fluidly rises and winks as he passes her. The expression on Fenuka’s face is priceless, and I convulse in a fit of giggles. She can’t maintain her stiff upper lip for long, and I gradually see a smile break across her face. “Up—you brazen hussy!” she teases me as she throws a pillow in my direction.
***
Dolores makes light work of the interview, and before I know it, Fenuka is hurrying us out of the center and into the waiting hovercraft. The further we get from Illumina the more relaxed I feel, although I know it’s an illusion, our fate will be no different once we’re back home. We collect Lily and Deacon on the way; they run out of the house and throw themselves into my arms. I smell the familiar scent of peaches from Lily’s hair and feel the softness of Deacon’s skin next to mine; I’ve missed them so much.
I hand Dr. Zousa the gift I bought for her in Illumina, my way of saying thanks for taking care of my siblings. She thanks me profusely while acknowledging that it really wasn’t necessary. Eve is mad keen to update me on her wedding planning, and she needs me to try on my bridesmaid dress, but it’s the last thing I feel like doing. I desperately want to get home, to familiarity, and try to unwind. Eve is disappointed but understanding. I promise to call around first thing tomorrow morning.
After we’ve unpacked and eaten, I sit on the couch with Lily and Deacon as they show me the work they’ve done on the memory book. They’ve clearly put in hours as I review all the cards, photos, letters, poems and mementos that are now pasted in. Lily has decorated the corner of each page by hand,
and it’s truly a work of art. “It’s perfect guys, let’s set it on the sideboard, so we have a constant reminder of Dad.” Lily gets up and clears a space between some of the framed photos and finds a home for it.
We’re all quietly contemplative—so much has happened in the last few weeks that there’s hardly been time to come to terms with his death. As much as I’m thrilled to be home it’s tarnished with sorrow; this house holds so many memories of him. I won’t be living here for long though, once we’re married Cal and I will be moving into our own house.
The authorities have granted every newly-married couple a house at the time of their wedding. As the Silentium Couple, we receive a complimentary upgrade and the option of working with an architect and interior designer, to create the house of our dreams. Fenuka has already uploaded their details to my data-cuff and sent me tons of wedding information, as well as organizing a first meeting with our wedding planner. The speed at which the authorities move is frightening; it feels like we’ve only just gotten off one merry-go-round to be forced onto another. I’m worried over what will become of Lily and Deacon, and I make a note to discuss this with Fenuka next week.
“How’s Mom?” I ask Lily.
“Much better Ari, we’ve been visiting her every day, and mostly she’s fine.”
“And the other times?” I enquire.
“They’ve been hard, a few times we visited it was as if we were invisible. Almost like she was asleep with her eyes open. They were the days I wished you were there,” she says forlornly. I must remember to ask Dr. Zousa for an update when I’m over in Eve’s in the morning.
Cal sleeps in my room again tonight. I really shouldn’t permit it as I’m becoming far too reliant on having his arms around me at night. But I figure, at this stage, if the authorities were going to punish us for anything it wouldn’t be for this. I only let him give me a perfunctory goodnight kiss though; I know that if we kiss for longer we won’t be able to stop. “This is so frustrating,” he whispers in my ear.
“It won’t be forever,” I whisper back.
“Ariana,” the tone of his voice makes me turn around to face him. “I want to get married now, as soon as possible,” he says.
“Why the rush?”
“I don’t see why we should delay the inevitable. And you’re my choice, I want to spend the rest of my life with you and I want it to start right now,” he whispers.
I’m in turmoil. It’s not that I don’t want to be with him, and he’s right—it’s most likely inevitable—but we have five months before I turn eighteen, and if we wait, then events with the rebels may overtake the necessity of having to get married this young. I still want to be with him, there is no one else I want as much as him in the whole world. But at least my way we could decide when to get married, when we’re both good and ready. My dilemma is simple, how can I explain this to him without hurting his feelings? “Cal,” I whisper back. “I love you—you’re everything to me, and more, but we have an opportunity here, to wait and get married in our own time. So I think we should set the date as far out as possible and see what happens,” I say cautiously.
“Is that the only reason you want to delay it?” he asks quietly.
“Of course, what other reason could there be?” I ask, and I’m confused. He takes forever to reply.
“Maybe you’re not sure,” he says finally, and his face looks strained.
“NO! That’s not it at all. Cal, please don’t think that. I just think it’s better if we could do it our way, not when it suits the authorities,” I implore.
“I’m afraid if we wait that you’ll change your mind or fall for someone else.”
I can only assume it’s hurt and uncertainty clouding his judgment. “I promise that won’t ever happen,” I whisper as I hug him tight to me. We don’t talk about it anymore, but the atmosphere is tense in the room; this difference of opinion has wedged a gap between us.
I drift into a fraught sleep. I’m startled awake by the loud siren of the alarm; I sit bolt upright in a panic. Cal is instantly wide awake, alerted by my sudden movement. “What is it?”
“I didn’t dream of Zane,” I whisper back, and I struggle to curb my fear. “What if something’s happened to him?” I ask in a panic stricken voice. I see some unnamed emotion register on Cal’s face.
“We shouldn’t panic until we know more, there could be any number of explanations as to why you didn’t have your dream,” he says rationally.
“It can’t be coincidence Cal! I’ve been dreaming of Zane for months and even when I wanted to shut it off I couldn’t! Now there’s nothing at a time when we know he’s trying to reach Novo,” I say in a frenzied tone.
“Ssshh, Ariana, quieten down, eyes and ears, you know?” he beseeches. I nod my head and keep the rest of my thoughts to myself, but I’m worried all day. I try to send messages to Zane in my head and wait patiently for a response, but none is forthcoming.
***
I’m on my way back from Eve’s house when he approaches me. I spot him in the distance walking towards me. At first I struggle to place him, then I remember—the military man! The one who gave me the message from my father! “Ariana, how are you? How are you coping?” he says as he reaches me.
“I’m OK. I’m sorry, but I didn’t catch your name the last time we met,” I say deliberately.
“How rude of me, I’m Commander De Luca. I really miss your dad, as no doubt you do,” he says sincerely.
“I do, but there’s been so much going on over the last few weeks that I’ve barely had time to breathe, let alone think,” I say truthfully.
“Of course, and congratulations on your achievement,” he says. “Add me to your contacts list and please call anytime if I can do anything for you. Take care.” He hugs me, and I feel him press the note into my hand; I conceal it fully in my fist.
“I will and thanks so much ... for your concern,” I say formally as we part company.
I want to rush home immediately, but I don’t want to look too obvious, so I force myself to walk at a leisurely pace. No one is home, so I go upstairs and take a shower. I don’t think the authorities are watching in here, although I can’t be sure, so I curl myself into a corner and furtively unwrap the note. It’s brief, like last time. I don’t recognize the writing though. “Two days, be ready, be careful,” is all it says. It’s probably deliberately vague in case it ends up in the wrong hands. I presume it means that I will have contact in two days and to be on my guard until then. I wonder if it’ll be Zane who makes the contact, and what meeting him for the first time will be like. Does he know that I have no memories of him? How weird will it be? He’s a stranger to me but apparently not I to him. I wonder if my memories will come flooding back once I see him or if they are truly gone forever.
I discreetly burn the note in the fire. I IM Cal to identify where he is and he pings me to say he’s around the corner. Shortly afterwards I hear the front door open, and Cal comes into the living area, and sits down beside me on the couch. “I’ve been thinking; forget about what I said last night—I don’t want to do anything to upset you, we’ll do it your way,” he says. I’m touched that he would forgo his own needs, so readily, in favour of mine.
“Thank you. I love you so much,” I tell him. He kisses me tenderly on the lips and pulls me into an embrace. I whisper details of the note and my latest dream in his ear.
“It’s really happening,” he whispers back, and I see the spark has returned to his eyes.
That night I welcome the return of my dreams, helping to diminish my anxiety, even in slumber.
Zane and his travelling companions are alighting the stealth-craft, it’s the dead of night and the moon is casting strange shadows on the stark, hard ground. They run to the awaiting rovercraft and quickly get in. The vehicle takes off at speed in a south easterly direction. Zane peers out the window as a box is passed around the passengers. He lifts one of the vials, connects it to the tube and plunges it into his arm. He then passes
the box to the woman seated to his right. He peers intently into my eyes as he says, “Ari, I’m here, at last! When it’s safe, I’ll come meet you. I love you.”
CHAPTER 26
I recant all but the last part to Cal the next morning; I don’t think he would appreciate Zane’s expression of love, sibling or not. The dreams no longer seem to wake me up during the night, I’ve grown accustomed to them and my body doesn’t react in panic anymore.
Today is Eve’s wedding and Fenuka is downstairs to fix my hair and make-up. She’s brought a cute suit for Deacon and a new dress for Lily. They’re both delighted and I hug Fenuka tightly. “Thank you so much. Not just for this ... but for everything, I couldn’t have survived the last few months if it weren’t for you,” I tell her genuinely.
“It’s been a pleasure Ariana,” she says.
Cal tells me I look gorgeous as he hooks one arm through mine and one through Lily’s. I clutch Deacon’s hand with my free left hand and we travel to the convention center together.
Eve is a stunning bride and I’m happy that she’s so happy. I’m severely distressed to note that Ada is one of Evan’s groomsmen, Cal thinks it’s hilarious at first until he realizes that I have to participate in the obligatory first dance with him. All of a sudden he’s fuming and I notice him looking on moodily from the side of the dance floor. I’m mortified as I stutter out an apology, but Ada is as good-natured as ever, and he insists that no apology is necessary.
I feel his hand on my waist before I see him. “Let go of my fiancée,” Cal tells Ada and the threat in his tone is blatant.
“Hey Cal, no sweat,” Ada says pleasantly, as he looks at me in concern. And that’s all it takes: that one look in my direction. Cal’s fist connects with Ada’s jaw in an instant. Ada is caught off-guard as he stumbles backwards and falls to the floor, taking another dancing couple with him. Pandemonium breaks out as numerous people rush to the dancefloor at once.
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