by Eve Gaddy
“Of what? That I’ll turn out like he did?”
“No. I’m afraid to let go. It’s taken me so long to be able to take care of my family and then when you offered me the airport job, I thought finally things were going to get easier. But now this.” She gestured at the room. “And I know we have to move. I know we can’t stay here any longer.”
“I don’t think you’re afraid to let go. I think you’re afraid to hold on. I think you’re afraid to open yourself up again. But, Laurel, committing yourself to someone you love doesn’t make you weak.”
“That’s not—” She broke off.
“Isn’t it? Isn’t that what you believe? If you believe you can only depend on yourself, if you believe that love won’t last then you don’t have to take the scary step of allowing yourself to be vulnerable again.”
“Maybe…maybe you’re right.”
He knew he was but Laurel was going to have to come to that conclusion herself.
“I wasn’t sure how you’d react if I told you the truth about my marriage. But I should have trusted you.”
God, he wished that too. He kissed her, then let her go. “Isn’t it time to pick up the kids from daycare?”
Laurel picked up her phone from the table where she’d set it and looked at it. “Just about. Harlan and Savannah are going to keep them tonight and tomorrow during the day so I can finish cleaning up the apartment.”
“Does that mean you’ll be free to stay with me?”
She smiled. “It does.”
“Good. I’ve got some things I need to do. Give me a call after you drop off the kids and we’ll get something to eat.”
“Zack, wait a minute,” Laurel said as they prepared to leave. “Thank you.” Laurel put her arms around his waist and hugged him.
“For what?”
“Everything. For helping me. For listening to me. For being here.”
He tilted up her chin and kissed her. “Where else would I be?”
*
While Laurel was taking the kids, Zack called Harlan. “How soon can you make the house livable?”
“Livable? Not long. A few days or maybe a week unless something unexpected pops up. You’ll have to avoid parts of the porch but—”
“Can you block off those parts so the kids won’t hurt themselves?”
“Laurel and the kids are moving in with you? That’s great, Zack.”
“Don’t celebrate yet. She’s thinking about moving in with the kids. Without me.”
There was a stunned silence. “Without you? What the hell? Why?”
“Long story.” And not one he was willing to go into. “The point is, how soon can you have it ready for Laurel and the kids to move in? I realize they’ll have to live with the remodeling but it can’t be helped.”
“The electrician has checked it and says it’s safe, though you’ll want to add lighting. The plumber has been there and says there are some problems but nothing he can’t fix. The kitchen is good. I think the master bath is okay.”
“Laurel loves that tub. The plumbing to it is working?”
“The plumber didn’t say it wasn’t, so I assume it is. He said the bathroom in the other downstairs bedroom is good and the half bath is okay. The upstairs I’m not too sure about. I can ask him.”
“What else?”
“The broken windows have been replaced, so that’s good.” He stopped talking for a moment, then asked, “Are you sure you’re okay with this, Zack?”
Okay? Not really. He wasn’t happy about it, of course. But one step at a time. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
“I’ll have my team step it up and get a landscape crew in there too. The yard needs help before it can be upgraded to merely terrible.”
Zack laughed. From what he remembered that was being kind. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”
Now he just had to wait and see what Laurel decided. And if she still couldn’t move into his house, he’d help her find a decent apartment. Even though it was killing him that she couldn’t bring herself to trust him.
Laurel came over after she dropped off the kids. “I felt guilty leaving them so soon after the robbery but they were so excited about having popcorn and watching a movie they hardly knew I left.”
“They’ve told me before that they always have fun with their uncles and aunts.”
“I know they do.” She sat on his couch and sighed, resting her hand on her stomach.
Recently she’d started showing, though she wasn’t as big as she thought she was. Zack could tell a difference but mostly when she was naked. Which, of course, made him think about sex. Which he highly doubted she was in the mood for.
“My back is killing me.”
Right. No sex. “I called in a pizza order a little while before you got here. If you lie down on my bed I’ll rub your back before we eat. You probably did too much.” He paused and added, “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Other than my backache. Don’t worry, it’s normal. But I will take you up on the back rub.”
The doorbell rang and he went to get the pizza while Laurel went back to the bedroom. He tipped the delivery guy and put the pizza on the stovetop in the kitchen.
Laurel had taken off her shoes and blue jeans and was lying on her stomach waiting for him. Damn, he should have realized she’d take off her jeans to give him better access to her lower back.
He sat beside her and started rubbing. Laurel groaned. “Oh, my God, don’t stop.”
“Is your back going to hurt like this the whole time?”
“Yes. And it will only get worse.”
Zack continued to massage her back, doing his best not to think about sex, but she’d also gotten rid of her bra, which made it even harder to do.
Finally, she thanked him and rolled over onto her back. “You’re awfully good at that. I have another area that needs attention from your magic hands.”
Zack smiled. “And where is that?”
She took his hands and placed them beneath her shirt, on her bare breasts. “Right here,” she said huskily.
“I can do that,” he answered, silently giving thanks. He caressed her breasts, plucked at her nipples until they tightened, then lifted her shirt to suck each one. He took his time, moving from one breast to the other, savoring each one as he licked and swirled his tongue. He kissed her mouth—long, leisurely kisses until he knew she was as turned on as he was. But he didn’t hurry. He kissed his way along her jaw, down to her neck, and then her chest. He caressed her everywhere, her soft, silky skin driving him mad.
Finally, he slipped inside of her, wondering if there could ever be anything better than this, sharing not just of their bodies but of something more. Something deeper.
“I love you, Zack,” Laurel said, as he sank into her, feeling her muscles tighten, her warm flesh glove him. “I love you,” she said again, as he emptied himself into her and she came with him.
*
Saturday morning came, and with it, the need for decisions. Zack hadn’t pushed Laurel to decide about living at the house without him. In fact, it didn’t seem to bother him a bit that she hadn’t made up her mind. But rather than being happy he wasn’t pressing her, she was annoyed.
Didn’t he want to live with them? He was being too nice, and she didn’t like it.
Oh, of course she wanted him to be nice. But…if he really wanted to live with her, or for God’s sake, marry her, wouldn’t he be more insistent that she decide?
Aware she was being just a tiny bit irrational, Laurel resolved to let it go. Except she couldn’t.
Why couldn’t she make up her mind? Was she so afraid of making another mistake that she was willing to let Zack go? He wouldn’t wait around forever for her. Or maybe he would. After all, she was having his babies. She put her hand on her stomach. Twins. Identical twins. What a miracle. The father of her twins was a good, loving man. She knew without a doubt that he loved Cody and Katrina as if they were his own. And her children loved him.
&n
bsp; Hell, she loved him. So much. She’d finally admitted it to him. Yesterday. And last night. Several times, she remembered with a smile.
Wasn’t it time to let go of her past mistakes and embrace the future? A future to share with the man she loved. Whatever that future might bring, it would be much brighter with Zack in her life.
“I need to run by the house this morning,” Zack said. “Should I meet you at the apartment after I’m finished or do you want to wait until I’m through and I’ll come get you?”
“There’s a third option.”
He looked a little mystified. “What’s that?”
“I’ll come with you to the house. We’ll go to the apartment after that.”
He stared at her a moment. “You want to go to the house with me?”
“That’s what I said. Why, don’t you want me to?”
“Of course I want you to come. Considering you’ve refused to set foot in it after I first showed it to you, though, I’m a little surprised.”
He sounded distinctly annoyed, which perversely, pleased her. “Are we going to stand here all day or are we going to see the house?”
“Let’s go,” he said with a bite in his voice. He held his apartment door open and she swept out.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Zack didn’t make the mistake of thinking that Laurel wanting to see the house meant she’d decided to live there. With or without him. It was hard not to get his hopes up, but…she was acting weird. So he pretended that taking her to see the house, the house he wanted to live in with his family, was no big deal.
On the drive over, he admitted his stomach hadn’t gotten the message.
When they arrived the first thing they saw was a bunch of people in the yard, working industriously. It already looked better as they’d managed to clean up the trash and broken glass and moved on to the grass and plants. Zack thought with a lot of work and a little TLC the yard might even look pretty.
“I didn’t realize the crews worked on weekends.”
“Harlan put a rush on it, so I suspect they’re pulling overtime.”
“Did you ask him to hurry and get it ready?”
“I asked him to hurry and make it livable. Enough that you and the kids could live here if you decided that’s what you wanted to do. But he was already putting it in high gear. Harlan thought another week or so would do it.”
Laurel continued up the front steps. “What’s all that?” she asked, spying a roped-off area of the porch.
“The boards are rotted so they’re going to block off that part of the porch until they can fix it.”
Zack hadn’t been inside in a couple of weeks and he was surprised at how much better the house already looked. He heard banging coming from the upstairs. “I wonder if they’re doing something to the bathrooms up there. Harlan wasn’t sure they’d gotten to those yet.”
They went upstairs and found the plumber replacing the toilet in one of the bathrooms. Zack introduced himself and Laurel and after talking about the other upstairs bathroom and what needed to be done, they left him to his work.
“Did you have a particular reason for coming here today?” Laurel asked him as they went downstairs.
“I wanted to see the progress but I also wanted to make sure that everything it needs to make it habitable is being addressed.”
“Is it?”
“Harlan is overseeing the remodel personally. What do you think?”
Laurel laughed. “Knowing my big brother, I’m not worried.”
The master bedroom was spacious and filled with light. There were two closets, neither one of them large. “You’ll probably want to see about enlarging the closets, but I figured that could wait.”
“I love the wood floors. I can’t believe they originally covered them up with carpet.”
She walked into the master bath and stopped at the threshold.
“Harlan said everything works,” Zack offered. “He said if you’ll decide what color you want on the tub’s exterior he’d have it painted for you.”
Laurel had been quieter than usual. He couldn’t tell what she was thinking. He wasn’t even sure she liked the house, though the first time she’d seen it she had seemed to.
Zack was having an increasingly hard time not peppering her with questions. Questions like, “Have you decided what the hell you want to do?” and “How long are you going to torture me before you make a decision?” But he didn’t say either of those things.
They wandered through the other rooms, the kitchen, family room, dining room, office and finally the second downstairs bedroom. “This would make a perfect nursery for the twins,” Laurel said. “Once it has new carpet, anyway.”
“I’m getting the impression you don’t like the carpet in this house.”
“You’re very perceptive.”
Zack grinned.
“Is there wood floor beneath this carpet? If there is, we might want to keep it and just add rugs.”
“Let’s see.” Zack pulled up a corner of the rug. “Yep, wood. The same pretty wood that’s in the rest of the house.”
“Oh, good. Then we’ll have the floor refinished and buy rugs. Lots of rugs. I don’t think I ever realized how big this house was,” Laurel said.
“Yeah, it’s a house meant for a big family.”
“We could fit four kids easily. Or more.”
He almost missed it. She’d said “we” for the second time. “More? You want more kids? After you have the twins?”
“That depends.”
“On what?”
“On whether you want more children.”
He simply stared at her.
“Well?” she asked. “Do you?”
“Is this a trick question?”
Laurel laughed. “No, it’s for real.”
He thought about it. He was an only child and while his parents were great, he’d always wondered what it would be like to have a brother or sister. “Then yes. I’d like more kids.”
“So you can have more kids of your own.”
“So we could have more kids, period. Cody and Katrina might not be my blood, but I love them like they are.”
Her gaze softened. “I know you do. They love you too.”
“Laurel? Why are we talking about having more children after the twins?”
They’d been standing close to each other but now she turned to him, slipped her arms around his neck and looked up at him with a smile. “I think it’s important to be on the same page about children when you’re planning to be married.”
The tightness in his chest eased. “Are we getting married?”
“That depends on your answer to my question. I love you, Zack. Will you marry me?”
“Are you sure?”
“More sure than I’ve ever been of anything. What about you?”
“Yes.” He picked her up and kissed her. “Yes.” He twirled them around and kissed her again. “Absolutely yes.”
He kissed her once more, long and deep, then set her down and grabbed her hand. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” she asked, laughing as he pulled her along with him.
“To celebrate. And after that to tell Cody and Katrina we’re going to be a family.”
Epilogue
Zack heard the kids playing in the backyard. From their shrieks of joy he suspected they were on the jungle gym they’d bought a week ago. It was a beautiful October afternoon, warm but with fall leaves turning shades of orange, gold and red. He heard Laurel’s laugh and smiled. She laughed a lot now. She’d cut back on her hours at Kelly Boots and while she was still the accountant for the airport, she’d been able to spend a lot more time with Cody and Katrina.
At six months pregnant with the twins, she tired more easily, but she took it in stride. He just hoped she didn’t freak out when she saw what he’d brought home. He’d come in through the kitchen so he could surprise her. “I should have checked with her,” he told the black and gold puppy under his arm. “But better
to ask forgiveness than permission, right?”
The puppy yapped and licked his hand. “Let’s go find Mom.”
She was sitting on the porch with her back to him. He opened the door and walked up behind her, covering her eyes with one hand. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”
“Zack, when did you get home? What are you doing?”
“I told you, giving you a surprise. Close your eyes and hold out your arms.”
“It better not be something slithery.” She held out her arms.
“Slithery, no.” Wiggly, you bet. He set the puppy in her arms.
“What’s this?” she asked, opening her eyes and staring at the black and gold bundle of energy.
“It’s a puppy,” he said, stating the obvious.
The puppy yapped and licked Laurel’s face. “I suspected that,” she said dryly. “Why did you bring home a puppy?” She scratched it behind its ear and spoke to it. “Yes, you’re a good dog, aren’t you?”
“One of the airport workers adopted a pregnant dog and this is one of her puppies. He was trying to find them homes so he didn’t have to take them to the shelter. He said his family couldn’t afford to keep more than one of the puppies. There are twelve of them,” Zack added. “Isn’t she cute?”
“Of course she’s cute. She’s a puppy. And she’s going to be big. Look at the size of her paws.” She held one up for Zack to look at.
Big paws. Maybe he hadn’t thought this through. The kids spied him and came running toward him. “Daddy’s home! Daddy’s home!” They hurtled up the stairs and threw their arms around his legs. He ruffled each child’s hair.
“Hi, guys. How’s it going?” He and Laurel had been married two months and Cody and Katrina had been calling him Daddy since that day. It gave him a rush every time he heard either of them say it. Adoption plans were in the works and he and Laurel hoped the adoption would be final before the birth of the twins.
“We’ve been playing,” Cody said.
Katrina added, “On the jungle thingy. We love it, Daddy.”
“Oh, yeah? I’m glad.”