“That’s a shame,” Todd said. “Katie here was looking forward to dancing with you at the disco tonight, and what’s that Bobby? Bobby wants to know if you have any new engines for him this week?” I thought of the red Camaro. “No, I don’t,” I said abruptly.
At lunch time Entwistle rang and reminded me to come in at five thirty. I had just about decided not to go to the meeting, but annoyed myself by finding myself agreeing on the phone to be there. Then Jo rang to clarify that I was going to be ok for Saturday and asking me to come and help finish my car off tonight. I agreed to that too. It was only fair.
I had a shower for the first time since Tuesday then got into my work gear and went out to the bike. Quinn was lurking about. I ignored him, but he accosted me over the hedge.
“What’s this about you driving in the BriSCA F2s?” He demanded. “Why didn’t you tell me? Rob went and said he saw you driving at Sheffield and I was arguing black was blue that it couldn’t have been you, but he said it was definitely you and you came in near the front and then I felt like a right noodle!”
“What’s new?” I said drily. Good on you, Rob, I thought. You’ve hyped up the good result in my second race and not happened to mention my coming in last in my third…
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He repeated sulkily.
“What, like you told me you were working on F1s and driving Bangers when we were still supposedly ‘going out’ and supposed to be sharing our lives together?” My tone was angry and sarcastic in equal measure. “Nothing I do is any of your business now,” I snapped as I slammed my helmet on.
I glanced in my mirror as I roared off round the corner and saw he was still glaring fiercely after me.
The garage was quiet when I arrived. Completely empty as promised. I drew up, left my lid hanging on the handlebars, and went into Entwistle’s office. He gave me a slight smile and indicated I sit down. I was glad he didn’t ask me how I was.
“So Eve,” he began. He gave a sigh and stopped. I looked out of the window. I didn’t want to meet his eyes. “So, Eve,” he started again. “I’ve sacked Trevelyn and I’m hoping you will feel able to come back to work on Monday.”
My head whipped round and I stared at him. “You’ve sacked him?” That was the last thing I’d ever imagined would happen.
He spread his hands out. “We’re supposed to be marketing to the female demographic at this garage, not employing dangerous predators that we can’t trust with our customers.”
“You’re serious?” I asked incredulously. “You believed me and you sacked him?”
“I talked to Steve Bolton as you suggested.” He frowned. “And frankly I’m horrified. Apparently you went to him for help weeks ago. He said he hadn’t realised how serious it was, just thought it was a bit of a laugh. And then he told me that Trevelyn had bet he could get you in the sack before Bowker left. Apparently Bolton and Dewhurst had laid bets that he wouldn’t be able to, and Bowker had bet he would.”
I stared at Entwistle, appalled. “So..?”
Entwistle pressed his hands down on the desk between us. “So it seems that when you turned him down right up until the last night, he couldn’t be seen to fail…”
“The egotistical bastard!” I clenched my teeth. I felt so angry I could hardly bear it. And all that time Steve Bolton had known what was going on and not told me. What a git!
“I feel partly to blame, I haven’t been on top of all this,” Entwistle was saying. “I’ve given them such a bollocking that I don’t know if they’ll dare to open their mouths for weeks. And I decided to put them onto a written warning, the pair of them. It’s not acceptable to treat a work colleague like this and they need to know it. I’ve let things slide. But now Bowker’s gone we’ve a chance to start a new chapter. Start a whole new regime. I’ve made it clear to Dewhurst how I want the new work culture round here to be and I’ve made it clear to him that he’s to lead from the front or he won’t be keeping the senior position.”
I couldn’t quite take it in. “So do the men know what happened?” I asked at last, feeling the colour rising hotly in my cheeks.
Entwistle shook his head. “I promise you I haven’t told them, but they must know something serious has happened or I wouldn’t be sacking Trevelyn. I told them that he hadn’t completed his probationary period with us yet, and that this bet thing was just one example of what I don’t like about his behaviour around women and that I’ve decided he isn’t the right fit for the team or the business.”
That sounded pretty convincing to me, actually. What a relief!
“So we’re a mechanic down for the near future,” Entwistle said seriously to me, “and I would be really grateful if you’d take back your resignation and come into work again tomorrow.”
Dammit, I couldn’t miss Belle Vue. Not after all this. Jo would kill me. He’d mentioned Monday at the beginning of the meeting, so suggesting tomorrow was him just pushing his luck.
“Monday,” I bargained.
“Ok,” he agreed without any hesitation, so I was glad I’d dared to ask for it.
I went straight on to Jo’s, feeling a great deal better. I hadn’t realised how much I hadn’t wanted to lose my job. And I never had to face Trevelyn again!
“Thank God you’ve turned up at last,” Jo greeted me. “It’s been bloody hard work with just me and Dad.”
I knew it wasn’t the done thing to be borrowing a car and then not be doing the work on it. I was really going to have to prove myself to them from now on to make up for this blip. I got stuck in straight away. We were finishing off my car. Jo’s was all ready. She’d had three fairly tame races at Sheffield, so there hadn’t been much to rectify.
An hour into it and I was beginning to feel a bit dizzy every time I went from bending to standing, or kneeling to standing. I felt a bit weak and watery and feeble all round. Finally, after getting up quickly from lying down to look under the chassis, I went really weird and the next thing I knew, the darkness was rushing up to engulf me.
I came to, lying on a sofa with my feet propped up on cushions.
“For goodness, sake Eve!” Jo said impatiently. “You’ve been out for ages. Dad had to carry you in.”
I made to sit up, but a roaring started in my ears.
“Just stay there for a bit,” Jo ordered, “and see how you are. I hope you’re going to be alright for tomorrow!”
She disappeared off and I lay there sunk into the big soft sofa looking up at the textured ceiling and the mini modern chandeliers. Somewhere in the background – I presumed in the kitchen because of the clattering noises that accompanied it – I could hear conversation.
“Honestly Mum, I’m so pissed off with Pete! First he goes and breaks his leg and then he lumbers us with this attention seeking prima donna!”
“What’s the problem do you think?” A woman’s voice. Presumably the invisible mother.
“I dunno. She said she’d been ill. To be fair, she does look really crap.”
A couple of minutes later and a face appeared over me. Not at all like Jo or Pete’s. She was really pretty. She sat down on the edge of the sofa.
“How are you feeling?”
“Weird,” I murmured.
“When did you last eat?”
I thought about it. “Monday night.”
There was a short silence.
“I’ll get you a drink,” she said.
Back in the kitchen I heard, “Well?”
“She’s not eaten for four days.”
Paul’s voice. “I hope we haven’t got an anorexic on our hands!” It sounded like Jo had infected him with her negativity about me.
“She wouldn’t eat all day at Sheffield either, I had to force her,” Jo said.
“Let’s reserve judgement shall we?” Jo’s mother responded in neutral tones. “I’m going to take her some Lucozade and I suggest we all stop work now and eat the chilli con carne I’ve got in the oven, and we’ll see how she feels after that shall we?”
/> The conversation was rather awkward over the meal. Pete had been helped through to the kitchen and sat on a special higher chair so his leg in its cast and iron frame would fit. Their kitchen was enormous, open plan and really posh. They’ve got money, I thought.
My stomach hurt when I ate after being empty for so long, but I had to force it down so they wouldn’t think I was anorexic.
“If they knew you’d passed out today, they wouldn’t let you race tomorrow,” Jo said.
“I’ll be fine,” I protested desperately.
“Thing is, if you’re starting with epilepsy, or even just some sort of virus causing blackouts, you shouldn’t be driving.” Jo was glaring over the table at me.
“Let’s wait and see how she is tomorrow, shall we?” Jo’s mum intervened. She looked across at me. “Have you got everything here tonight that you need for tomorrow?”
We kept all my racing gear here at Jo’s so after a moment’s thought, I nodded.
“So I propose Eve stays here overnight, so she doesn’t have to travel,” Jo’s mum suggested sensibly, “and in the morning I’ll make you all a slap up bacon and egg breakfast to build you all up, and you can see how she is when you arrive at the stadium.”
“Great idea, Mum!” Pete complimented.
“See, Pete’s positive,” Jo’s mum directed at her less than enthusiastic daughter.
“That’s cos he’s off his face on painkillers,” Jo pointed out with an annoyed look at her brother. “He’d think flying to the moon on a pogo stick would be a good idea at the moment if someone suggested it to him.”
Pete smiled good naturedly at her, “Sounds fantastic, when do we go?”
“Right that’s sorted then,” Paul said.
We assumed he meant me staying, not the proposed rocket propelled pogo stick.
Jo’s mum, who asked me to call her Sue, installed me in what seemed to me in comparison to my own house, a huge luxurious bedroom with a sink-in-to-your-ankles cream carpet.
After I had got into bed in my tee-shirt, she knocked on the door and came in. She sat on the side of the bed and looked thoughtfully at me.
“You haven’t been ill, have you?” It was said as a statement of fact.
I shook my head.
“I’m not going to ask-” She said. But she waited for a moment, just in case…
I said nothing.
She reached out and stroked my hair back from my forehead and smiled at me. “You have a good night’s sleep and eat properly tomorrow, won’t you?”
“Yes,” I promised meekly.
“Don’t mind Jo,” she added. “She’s just disappointed that Pete’s wrecked his chances of moving up the tables this season. He had a chance of getting into the World Championship Final this year. She finds it hard to get over things.”
I knew she was asking me not to hold it against her and to hang on in there.
“Pete’s really glad you’ve joined the team,” she added. “Even when he’s not off his face on morphine derivatives!”
“Ok,” I said.
Actually, I did sleep pretty well that night. The mattress was so soft it felt like I was floating. It made me realise I could feel the springs sticking through in my own one back home.
It was only my fourth time ever at a Stock car gathering, and only my second as a driver, and only my second time at Belle Vue but already the place and the procedures involved seemed familiar. Jo kept eyeing me, but she’d shut up about the fact that I shouldn’t be driving.
I went through the motions mechanically, but I couldn’t muster the same acute excitement that I’d had last time and I could sense that I was somehow lacking the motivation that I would need to achieve anything in the races today. Maybe if Pete had been able to come to encourage me and cheer me on then I’d have been able to muster some oomf.
I hung around at the barriers watching a Ministox race. Parents were yelling and shouting their encouragements. It occurred to me that Jo wouldn’t be cheering me, and even Paul was cool. Suddenly someone started screaming and I looked round quickly. A big pile up had started further round the bend and at the last moment a green mini had tried to take evasive action but ended up flipping sideways and as two more piled in behind, the momentum took the car right over onto its roof. A man ran out with a red flag, the other cars were pulling up and then suddenly flames could be seen issuing from the upside down one. The fuel pipe must have been severed. The kid was upside down, clearly wedged in by her crash helmet and firmly trapped. Men ran out with fire extinguishers and tried to clamber over the bonnets to get to it. Some woman, presumably the mother, was running out on to the track screaming and crying hysterically. A man grabbed her and she collapsed all over him, till he was holding all her weight. Stupid fucking bitch, I thought, why doesn’t she just go in and help out? All she’s doing is taking up the time of one of the blokes who could be rescuing her kid. Attention-seeking self-indulgent cow! The flames were dripping down and getting closer to the young driver, but the men were reaching in through the window and pulling the kid out. The driver turned out to be a slim girl of around thirteen or fourteen. The mother tried to dissolve hysterically all over her too but the girl was having none of it and shoved her away, keeping up her cool in front of the crowd. A photographer was running up to the girl, and back on the track the now safely extinguished mini was just being rapidly towed off, and the Minis were one by one being allowed to disentangle themselves from the scrum, and very shortly the race set off again.
I turned away. It was nearly time to get into my own car. A bubble of unexpected fear had formed in my chest. Sometime, almost certainly, I was going to have to face being turned upside down in the car. And maybe even trapped in there, and maybe even have to be pulled out through the window. Would I cope with that? Or would I get some terrible flashback to when I was six and the crash that killed my mother. What if I started to scream uncontrollably like I did when Holty reminded me of the day he’d pulled me out of that car? What if I disgraced myself?
I nearly walked slap bang into Quinn. I’d actually forgotten that he might be there. He eyed my driver’s clothing with jealous loathing.
“Did you see that kid?” I asked. “Reminds you why all our gear has to be fire retardant.”
“Yeah, she handled herself real well,” he commented, averting his eyes as though he couldn’t bear to look at me.
“You driving today?” I asked.
“No,” he said abruptly.
“Too bad,” I said.
He glowered at me. He was just so jealous he was reverting to five year old behaviour. “Yeah, but just as well for you, as I’d beat you hands down at this. You’re so pathetic you haven’t even upgraded your weedy little bike yet. You just won’t be able to handle it!”
“Yeah?” I raised my eyebrows coolly at him. “Well, it’s just a shame that you’re never going to get the opportunity to find out!”
I heard my race being called out and glanced at my watch. “Time to go,” I said and turned on my heel, leaving him fuming behind me.
Right – you jealous little tyke – I’ll show you! That was just the kick up the arse I needed to get my brain and my adrenaline back into gear. The only way to punish him was to run such a good race that he had to eat his words, and better still, hopefully have to listen to Rob making approving noises about my novice career all the way home.
“Hurry up, Eve, where have you been?” Jo was impatient and on edge.
We were both in the same first Heat today. “Are you going to bump me?” I enquired.
“Only if you get in my way,” she said.
Jo had decided that I shouldn’t have the black cross up this time, so I was at the front with the other white tops. I hoped everyone from last time would have forgotten about me. This time, from the very start I just threw myself round. Despite this, a lot of the top cars still managed to overtake me, nudging me out of the way and nipping by on the inside. By half way through the race, I was half way back in the pack
. And then it just seemed to click. I became one with the car. I suddenly found I had an instinct when someone was about to nudge me and I would manage to take evasive action. I saw tiny gaps and forced myself through. I came eighth. Jo came ninth. So that meant I was going through to the final, and she was having to drive again in the Consolation.
“Are you sure you’ve never done this before?” Paul queried with a slight smile.
Jo was in a foul temper.
It meant that my euphoria almost immediately died away and was replaced with an apologetic anxiety. That just made it worse with Jo. I just pleaded with that God I didn’t believe in, for her to qualify for the final in her next race. She did. But now I knew that she’d be my nemesis in this one as she’d definitely target me. I could feel it in her darkening gaze prickling on the back of my neck.
I hadn’t yet dared to nudge anyone. I’d studied a lot of footage online, to try to work out what angle was the most productive, but I was scared it would back fire on me and I would throw myself out of line and slow my own self up instead of pushing the other aside. I didn’t want to look cocky or stupid. What if Jo got in front of me and deliberately blocked me? I couldn’t bash into Jo, it would cause too much trouble. But on the other hand, if I allowed an attitude like that to rule in my head, I would never make it in this game. I’d have to be ruthless.
My anxiety was putting me off my stride. I tried to achieve the supreme concentration of my first race, but I was overthinking it. The gold top came through from the back and gave me an expert little shove. I could tell he really could drive, as all he’d done was just get me out the way, without any malice, and without damaging my own race. I corrected the wheel to pull myself back in line, and it suddenly gave me the confidence to put my foot down again. This wasn’t about score-settling or bullying, this was about skill and the thrill of racing. I narrowed my eyes, settled my breathing and got back into the zone. As a blue top, Jo had started way behind me, and now seemed to be struggling to catch up in the scrum. Towards the end of the race, I was still just about managing to keep my place in the first third of the cars, but Jo had broken free and was now chasing me down, a few centimetres from my back bumper. I struggled hard to keep just out of her reach as I guessed she’d make a point of giving me a shove as she passed. Just ahead, a yellow top hit another up the rear with some ferocity, and the car that was hit spun so hard round that it bounced off the barriers and came back at me. It was too late to take evasive action, I was going so fast that I just had to bash it out of the way. It was hurled off my front bumper and whirled away again, crashing head first into Jo’s car behind me. I accelerated away, but I’d lost my good position and I trailed in fourth from the end. And as we pulled up and then drove sedately off the track, I saw that Jo was standing with angrily folded arms beside her mashed vehicle, her expression thunderous, waiting for the tractor to come to tow her off.
Paradise Postponed Page 23