You don’t really know him anymore, she reminded herself. Be careful. Protect your heart. This is not a man who’s going to give you what you need most.
He gave her hand a squeeze and then was gone, her apartment suddenly feeling so empty.
Their conversation had chased him out, but she wanted nothing more than to just be there with him, not talking. Just sitting, sharing the ginger snaps. Sharing understanding.
Yes, she was headed for big trouble where Brandon Taylor was concerned.
Chapter Five
Brandon switched on the lamp in his office, the only illumination in the room. He’d left Cassidy’s almost an hour ago, and he was still too wound up to do anything relaxing, like watch the game he’d recorded or a movie. He could work; that might distract him from the thoughts jumping around in his head.
He stared at his computer screen. Yeah, right. He had way too much on his mind right now.
He thought he could commit to being a father, but how the hell did he know if he could? He was his mother’s son. He was his father’s son. And both Marge Taylor and Cornelius Taylor had let down their own children in the worst ways.
When Brandon was five, his father had basically bought off Margaret, who’d won custody of Jordan, Brandon and Daphne in the divorce. Back then, Brandon had thought that his mother seeking custody meant she’d loved them, cared about them—she’d fought to keep them. But she’d really been waiting for the payoff, for her mega-wealthy ex-husband to make her an offer that would justify her leaving her children. Millions. Not that Cornelius had paid her to leave them, exactly; the man had simply understood that money was more important to her than her own kids, and that had made her a poison in their lives. It was the poison Cornelius had found an antidote for. Brandon had had a love-hate relationship with his family’s wealth ever since he’d learned the whole sordid story when he was a young teenager.
It was all so ugly that Brandon tried never to think about it. The screwed-up blood that ran through his veins scared him, though. Because it meant he couldn’t entirely trust himself. He could say all he wanted that he’d be Father of the Year. But with his family’s past, who the hell knew? And talking about it with Cassidy had gotten him so turned around that he’d had to get away before the walls closed in on him. He’d felt so claustrophobic in that moment. Not because her place was tiny but because of how uncomfortably personal their conversation had turned.
Cassidy Ware always got him talking. How did she do it? He’d had two missions in mind for going over to her place. One was to bring her the food, but the other was to answer the question Daphne had raised: what did Cassidy need?
Instead of finding out so that he could offer her what she needed and more easily convince her to marry him, they’d gotten off track. He did believe they should marry, for all the reasons he’d already stated. But also because he felt he could be a better father, a more present, everyday father, if the two of them were a couple, living in the same home, making decisions together. Given how easy it was for a Taylor to mess up when it came to relationships and family, Brandon wanted the setup to produce the best possible results. That meant marriage. Not him living at the Taylor Ranch and being a father half the week or checking in. He didn’t want to be a part-time father. But unless Cassidy accepted his proposal, he’d have little choice.
Damn it.
He took a deep breath and tried to clear his mind by turning around in his chair and looking out the big windows onto the yard. But all he saw was Cassidy’s face. Cassidy’s swirly blond hair. Her hazel eyes. Her sexy body in her skinny jeans.
Her belly. That would soon swell with pregnancy. With his child.
His chest started to squeeze, and Brandon knew he had stop thinking, had to get his head back in his everyday world and not the life-changing bombshell that had been dropped on him.
He grabbed his phone and checked his schedule; his day had gone off the rails with the news and the trip to Lewistown and then the hour he’d spent at his sister’s farm. Scanning his to-do list, he saw he needed to get in touch with Geoff Burris, Bronco’s most famous son, to sign on to promote Taylor Beef in a major advertising campaign. One of the most talented ropers Brandon had ever seen, Geoff was a huge celebrity on the Montana circuit. He’d just unseated the reigning champ over the Fourth of July weekend, and he was on his way to becoming a national hero. Scoring him ahead of the Mistletoe Rodeo in November would have Taylor Beef numbers skyrocketing.
Because Brandon had gone to high school with Geoff, though Geoff was a few years younger, Cornelius had given Brandon the job of wooing the guy into promoting Taylor Beef. Abernathy Meats, a major competitor, was after Geoff, too, and that made the negotiations harder than Brandon expected. The champ had already made clear through his management team that he’d listen to both family’s pitches, but that he wasn’t ready to make a decision. Brandon had some great ideas—from traditional to out of the box—but Geoff’s team wasn’t committing. Brandon needed to get the guy signed before the Abernathys did, or that family, with whom the Taylors had had a mostly friendly rivalry for generations, would rub it in their faces. Taylor Beef was number one, Abernathy Meats a close second. His dad and uncles wanted to keep it that way—or actually, widen the gap. Securing a star like Geoff Burris would do that.
He could try Geoff’s cell phone right now. He’d had the number from years back when they’d been on the same sports team at Bronco High, Brandon as the captain and Geoff as a rising star. But calling after business hours to talk business could also piss the guy off, and that was the last thing Brandon wanted to do. He’d call in the morning. For now, he’d do some old-fashioned brainstorming with pen and paper to drum up a few new ideas for the potential advertising campaign. But ten minutes later, all he’d done was write Geoff Burris and Taylor Beef across a legal pad and tap the pen against all the blank space. Tap. Tap. Tap.
As if he could concentrate.
The fact that he could suddenly hear music playing wasn’t helping. Was that a Blake Shelton song? Brandon got up and went to investigate, but stopped in his tracks the second he left his office. He could see his father and stepmother slow-dancing in the living room to the strains of a country ballad, Jessica’s head on Cornelius’s shoulder. Then she lifted her head and they were gazing into each other’s eyes before Cornelius kissed her.
Brandon quickly backtracked into his office and shut the door. Whoa. That was unexpected. Had he ever seen his father and Jessica like that? He didn’t think so. Honestly, he’d never paid much attention.
The two did seem happy. But was it a for now thing? Two marriages hadn’t lasted. Why would the third be the charm?
Brandon switched off the lamp and left his office, heading for the grand stairs in the opposite direction of the living room. The music had stopped, and when Brandon started up the steps, he could see into the living room where his father and Jessica were in each other’s arms.
Why the hell is life so confusing? he wondered as he went into his suite.
He pulled out his phone, the urge to call Cassidy so strong. He needed to fight that urge, tamp it down. It was one thing to want to make the mother of his child comfortable, to make sure she had what she wanted. It was another to need to hear her voice. He put his phone away, grumbling as he flopped onto his bed. He couldn’t let himself get all twisted around. He was committing to fatherhood. He needed to focus on ensuring he’d be a great parent. That had to be his only personal mission.
He reached for the book he’d bought and flipped it open to his bookmark. He hadn’t gotten far. But he’d read long into the night, needing to fortify himself with how to be the dad he wanted to be.
* * *
At 7:00 a.m., when Java and Juice opened for the day, a group of customers waited for Cassidy to unlock and flip the sign from Closed to Open. The waiting group always made her heart happy. And no surprise—they were all parents or caregivers
with babies.
Cassidy loved having the kiddo crowd in the early mornings. She’d figured her early-morning hours would attract tired parents who’d be happy for somewhere to go before the rest of Bronco Heights opened, and she’d been right. So Cassidy had added a baby and toddler area with a playpen and foam mats and soft toys. Parents always told her how much they appreciated being able to set down their toddler at the little choo choo train table while they sipped an iced drink and had a brownie on the plush tan sofa along the wall beside it, or on the overstuffed chairs she’d picked up from thrift stores.
When the babies and toddlers went home for their naps, the en-route-to-work folks stopped in for espressos and bagels, then she had coffee-breakers and snack-needers who poured in and out till noon when the lunch crowd started arriving. The menu, offering everything from sandwiches and soups to crepes and pastries, brought in a varied customer base from the 7:00 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. hours.
A baby squealed as Cassidy was headed back behind the counter, and she turned to smile at the babies on laps and in the playpen, a toddler picking up one of the little colorful trains.
I’m going to be a mother, she thought, her smile turning into a grin. Maybe not the way I’d always imagined, but that’s okay. More than okay.
She’d spent a lot of time thinking about Brandon last night, about what a surprise he’d turned out to be, including hidden depths, and she’d had to issue another warning to protect herself. She had a lot going on. Running a business required her full attention, and now she had to split that attention with everything being pregnant required—from getting used to the idea itself, to doing some research and making lists.
As Hank and Helen, a wonderful married couple in their late sixties who’d started working for Java and Juice after their retirement, were in the kitchen making the popular breakfast sandwiches and slathering various kinds of cream cheese on bagels, Cassidy took orders and made drinks. There was a good number of people waiting in line, babies and strollers inching up, and she felt her heart ping with pride. I might not have achieved everything I intended, but this is my shop and it’s paying the bills. I can take care of my baby just fine. And I don’t have to do that from a luxe guest cabin at the Taylor Ranch.
As the morning wore on, Cassidy made smoothies and juices and coffee drinks, selected pastries from the display, handed over turkey BLTs, soups, and banana-chocolate crepes, and swiped many a credit card. She grinned when she saw her next two customers. Her friend Callie Sheldrick holding ten-month-old Maeve Abernathy. Maeve was the daughter of Tyler Abernathy, Callie’s widowed boyfriend. Callie explained she had the day off from her job as an admin at Bronco’s Ghost Tours so she was caring for the little one today.
“A little on-the-job training for someday,” her friend whispered down to the baby in a stroller beside her. Callie’s brown eyes shone with pure happiness. Cassidy could tell she adored the baby.
Speaking of... Maybe she’d share her big news with Callie. Aside from Brandon’s family, Cassidy didn’t want everyone to know, not this early in the pregnancy, but she’d sure like to talk over motherhood with a good friend. She glanced up at the big round clock on the wall. Ten minutes till her break.
Cassidy handed Callie her chocolate-almond smoothie, then hurried around the counter to say hi to the sweet baby when a little fist reached out and grabbed the end of her long ponytail. She swallowed her yelp. Maeve let out a huge laugh that couldn’t possibly come from such a small body.
Cassidy grinned at her friend. “That’s some grip!”
Callie gave the baby a tickle and she immediately let go. “Tricks of the trade. She once had my hair in a death grip and I finally learned that blowing a raspberry on her shoulder made her release and give out that great belly laugh.”
Cassidy wished she were writing all this down. These were the small details she’d need to know. “I go on break in a few. I’ll join you. I have news,” she whispered.
“Oooh, I will be all ears,” Callie said and then settled at a table near the baby section.
Cassidy made many more drinks, had to restock her cinnamon crumb cake, a big hit today, and the coconut-chocolate-chip scones, and then finally it was break time. She fixed herself a berry smoothie and headed over.
The baby was in her stroller beside Callie’s seat, her blue eyes drooping. Cassidy pulled over a chair, unable to take her eyes off Maeve, her soft blond-brown wispy curls, beautiful face and pink bow lips, the tiny nose, the rise and fall of her chest as she dozed off. Cassidy was suddenly overcome with a wave of butterflies flying around her stomach. At the responsibility of raising a child. Unlike Brandon, Cassidy had no doubt of her capacity to be a good parent, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t make mistakes. And the sight of baby Maeve, such a marvel of a tiny human being, made her long to be perfect, a TV mom who had all the answers.
She bit her lip, suddenly overwhelmed and unable to get any words out.
Callie peered at her. “What? What’s wrong, Cass?”
“I’m pregnant,” she whispered, glancing around to make sure no one was listening to their conversation.
Her friend’s eyes widened. “Tell me everything.”
Cassidy did. Starting with the stables, then describing the business-like marriage proposal and ending with how incredibly kind and thoughtful Brandon had been. She even told her friend about him bringing her four kinds of soup and heating up her chicken potpie.
“Wow,” Callie said. “Sure sounds like he’s going to be a great dad if he’s that caring.”
Cassidy took a sip of her smoothie to try to stop herself from what she was about to say. It didn’t work. “And a man a little too easy to fall in love with.”
There it was. Maybe what really had her so anxious.
“Ah, gotcha,” Callie said. “I see the problem. But eight months is a long time, Cass. And perhaps just the right amount of time for a self-confirmed bachelor like Brandon to come to a few realizations.”
Cassidy felt herself brighten. That was true. Maybe Brandon did just need some time with all these new developments. Becoming a dad and dealing with the hold his family’s past had on him. Realizing that a marriage without love was cold and empty. She certainly didn’t expect him to want to marry her because he loved her; they barely knew each other at this point. But she would like him to propose they begin a real relationship—a good start.
“I’m just starting to get to know Brandon,” Cassidy said. “And, to my big surprise, I like him. A lot. But that might be just the situation talking, the newness, the shock, and the reaction to how insanely sweet Brandon is being. Aside from the business deal of a marriage proposal.”
“Well, even that was sweet,” Callie said, taking a sip of her smoothie. “He’s giving up everyone else for you and the baby. That says something.”
“It really just says he doesn’t care about love. That’s what he’s giving up.”
Callie shook her head. “Hardly, my friend. Bronco’s Most Eligible Bachelor is giving up other women, Cass. No dating. No sex. If he’s proposing a marriage without love or romance, obviously he knows he’s saying ‘see ya’ to sex, too.”
Now it was Cassidy’s eyes that widened. “I didn’t think about it. I mean, I really didn’t have a chance to consider what his idea of partnership-marriage would mean...how we’d operate, you know?”
“If he’s giving up sex with all the hot singles in Bronco, then he either intends to have a sexual relationship with his wife or he’s truly suggesting a partnership and he cares more about you and the baby than he does about his sex life.”
“Huh. We already nixed a no-strings romance,” Cassidy explained.
“Um, Cassidy? I’d say a legal document like a marriage license is strings aplenty.”
Cassidy tilted her head. “Callie, you’re blowing my mind. I can’t take this all in! Don’t say anything else.”
Callie chuckled. “You have a lot to think about. But I suggest having a conversation with Mr. Taylor about exactly how he envisions this marriage to go. Not that you’d say yes, but you should have all the information.”
It was a lot to think about. Cassidy sat back and sipped her berry smoothie. Jeez. Now she understood a little of how Brandon had felt last night, why he’d up and bolted. Cassidy felt like doing that right now—running out the back door to just stop and breathe for a few minutes, digest what her friend was saying. It was all too much.
Woof! Woof, woof!
Cassidy bolted up. “That might be Maggie! The dog you said went missing from a Happy Hearts adoption event.”
Before Cassidy had known about the missing Maggie—she’d sort of named the adorable stray who’d been coming around the back door at Java and Juice Scooter. At first she thought Scooter must belong to someone nearby and was allowed to roam around the back alleys. She’d put out treats and spend a little too much time talking to Scooter, sharing her hopes and dreams. Animals sure were easy to talk to.
Cassidy was hopeful that the dog would still be there when she opened the back door, but the sweet pooch was gone.
“Hopefully she’ll come back,” Callie said as Cassidy returned to the table. “If she does and you can leash her, call Daphne and she can come by to check to see if it’s Maggie.”
“I definitely will,” Cassidy said.
The front door opened and a bunch of customers came in, including Tyler Abernathy, Callie’s boyfriend. The tall, lean rancher took off his cowboy hat, nodded at Cassidy and then smiled at Callie. “I was missing my two sweethearts so I figured I’d come in for a coffee and get to see you both even for just a few minutes.”
Tyler leaned down to give Callie a kiss, then gazed at her and his napping daughter with such love that Cassidy’s heart skipped a beat.
Love. Pure love. It might be really hard to come by, but it exists and I’m holding out for it, Cassidy thought.
The Most Eligible Cowboy Page 7