Billy wiped his eyes. “He called me a wuss and I told him he was an idiot, and then I took off and waited for him outside the building. He showed up about ten minutes later, handcuffed, with those two cops who arrested both him and me.”
“And you say you didn’t go inside and had no knowledge what he was up to?”
“Yeah, that’s right, but who’s going to believe me?”
“I do. And as your attorney it’s my job to make sure that everyone does.” I smiled at him. “Thank you, Billy. You’re going to be just fine. I’m going out now to talk to the police and your mother. With any luck, I’ll have you home in no time.”
* * *
I saved Billy’s ass, and it was one of the biggest thrills of my life. Right up there with winning my first trial. The wife of a CEO had taken her husband back to court after learning he’d sold his stock options, for the tune of two million dollars, only days after she had signed divorce papers. During discovery he hadn’t listed them as assets to be shared, figuring she’d never find out about them. Fortunately, a year later, she did.
I’ve won many cases over the years, but getting huge financial reward for already wealthy women didn’t come close to the elation I was feeling now. Billy would walk; no criminal record, no community service, no jail time. He was clean to start over, and hopefully make some better choices.
Candy thought I was some kind of hero, as did Fran, and Susie. For the first time in years, I felt like a hero. This pro-bono work made me realize why I had wanted to be a lawyer in the first place. I wanted to help innocent, good people. And helping Candy and Billy was an awesome start.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
The next day I was back at the office. The first person on my shit list was none other than Ted Martin, who was stupid enough to try to take me on.
“Susie, Fran, can I have a private meeting with you both?” It was eight thirty in the morning, and we were grabbing our first cup of coffee.
“Sure. What’s up?” Fran asked.
“I’ll tell you both later, but it has something to do with Ted, and possibly Marcia.” I continued to whisper so our co-workers wouldn’t overhear.
Susie nodded. “You mean about their affair?”
My eyes must have bugged because she laughed. “You mean you didn’t know?”
“Didn’t think it was official. So they are really doing it? No, don’t answer. I really don’t want to know.” I made a face. “Sorry, but I can’t picture them together. They don’t fit.”
“You’re right,” Fran answered. “Can’t figure the two of them out.”
I looked at them both. “I’d like to find out what the two of them are up to. See if you can dig up some dirt. I’ll explain later.”
I hurried back into my office with my freshly filled cup of coffee and sat back to sip on it. I saw Ted start to come in and then turn around to make a hasty retreat.
I jumped up and raced to the door. “Ted. I want to have a word with you…you…you little piece of shit.”
Ted squirmed. “I don’t have anything to say to you. I came to pick up my stuff because I’m going to be working with Marcia.”
“Oh, yes, Marcia.” My voice was heavy on the sarcasm.
He spoke loudly, obviously for the benefit of a few people who lingered in the hall to eavesdrop. “All those nights we worked together. You kept buying me dinner. I knew what you wanted. I could see the way you looked at me.” His voice rose, “I’m not a piece of meat, you know. Not yours for the picking.”
I saw a couple of secretaries stop dead in their tracks to openly listen. I waited until they moved on to say, “Look, you little twit, I don’t know where you’re coming from with all this, but I’ll tell you something. If you don’t back down on these false allegations, you’ll regret it.”
“Is that a threat?”
I barked out a laugh. “Don’t be silly. It’s a promise.”
He backed out, and I sighed with relief. I hate this crap. I felt my belly rumble and rubbed it absently. “Sorry, little one. Didn’t mean to upset you. The big, bad guy’s gone.” I saw Marcia march by my window with her head high in the air, looking straight ahead. I hoped she’d stop in and say hello because I had a lot to say to her, but I guess she wasn’t feeling real friendly.
My stomach grumbled again. “Oops. I did it again.” Okay, no more evil thoughts. All this aggravation was hurting the babe.
I got up, walked over to my file cabinet, bent to retrieve a file from the lower drawer, and felt a pull in my abdomen. What if something was seriously wrong? I was still waiting to hear the result of the latest battery of tests. I’d called the office and been told they weren’t back yet. All I knew at this point was they were conducting a chromosome analysis, and they wouldn’t know the result for a few more days.
Doctor Shelby had tried to comfort me with the knowledge that if something were wrong we still had plenty of time. But I was now twelve weeks pregnant, and, although the ultimate decision would be mine, I wasn’t sure if I was up to the task.
When Fran and Susie arrived together we had a little chat. I explained about the sexual harassment suit and they were dumb-founded.
“I can’t believe Ted would do something like this.” Susie said softly. “I always thought he was such a nice guy. What a little turd.”
Fran couldn’t agree more. “He doesn’t have the balls to do this alone. I would bet my stash of Snicker bars that Marcia put him up to it.”
“My thoughts exactly.” I looked from one to the other. “I’m putting you two on a secret mission. Your task is to catch them planning and plotting to get rid of me.”
Both women smiled.
Fran’s eyes shined. “How shall we go about it? Should I call Ted in and have him give me a formal complaint for your personal file? Pry him for details?”
“I wish you could but you’d likely get fired. Still it was a good thought.”
“What can I do?” Susie put her hands on her slim hips, frowning. “I want to nail Marcia. She’s such a stuck-up bitch. Treats the secretaries like crap.” Her eyes lit up with mischief. “Maybe I could tell her Daddy will give her a free nip and tuck if she’d confide in me.”
“Maybe he could double the size of her implants,” I suggested. “She’s already top heavy. If she was any larger she’d fall on her face.”
Fran nodded. “She always wears a jacket to cover them up, but man, she’s probably a size 40 double D.”
“God, we sound awful.” I laughed ruefully as I felt another stomach rumble. “Like a bunch of cats. Okay, let’s stick to the facts. She wants my job, and Ted’s helping her undermine me. Why?” I tapped my manicured nails against the desk. “She’s hoping I’ll get fired or at least not make partner.”
Fran thought for a moment. “If she’s having an affair with Ted, it should be easy to prove. Hire a PI to tail them, take pictures, whatever.”
Susie snorted. “I have a friend who owns a singing telegram company. Maybe she’ll let us borrow some costumes. Think they’d notice a gorilla on their tail?”
Fran looked horrified. “I’m all for tailing them, but no gorilla costume for me, thanks.”
I shook my head, laughing at the girls. “I don’t think we need disguises, do you?”
“Maybe they aren’t lovers.” Susie surprised us by saying. “Maybe Marcia has something on Ted, and she’s using the knowledge to get him to do what she wants.”
“That would make more sense,” I said.
“How are we gonna find out what it is?” Fran looked at the two of us. It’s not like they don’t know us.”
“We’re figure out something. Let’s have a drink at the Candy Bar after work and discuss it.”
* * *
“Why don’t we just hire somebody?” I asked.
Susie put down her margarita. “Because it would spoil the fun.” She giggled. “I think sneaking around and snooping on them will be a hoot.”
Fran’s face was a hot pink. I’m not sure if
the Mudslide she was slurping was the cause of it or the stimulating idea of being an amateur sleuth. Her head bobbed in agreement. “This is going to be more fun than I’ve had in forever. I don’t know how we’ll put it off, though.”
“Okay, let’s see. We’ve got three cars and three cell phones. One could tail for a few blocks, drop back, and allow the second car to follow another few blocks, then the third car, etcetera, until they get to their destination.” I sipped on my diet soda. “But it sounds complicated, and there is no guarantee we could do it without being spotted.”
Susie said, “I vote for the costumes.”
Fran pretended to pout. “I’d probably get stuck being a clown.”
Candy came over, a dishtowel slung over her arm, a pencil stuck in her big, bleached hair. “What are you three up to? I can see all your heads together, whispering about something.”
We told her, and she told us she wanted in on the action.
We named it Operation Candy Bar.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Candy came up with the idea of pretending to be from the EEOC so she could do the questioning. She’d gone to the law offices of Tyrone-Matheson’s wearing a navy pin-striped suit, waving a card, saying she was here to question the young man, Ted Martin about his sexual harassment suit.
She taped the conversation and we enjoyed it later at the bar. Fran, Susie, and I sat at a corner table far away from other patrons and listened avidly to one of the silliest interviews we’d ever heard.
“Mr. Martin, I will be taping this interview and jotting down a few notes. I hope you’ll be comfortable with that?” Candy had said.
“Sure, that’s fine. And hey, please, call me Ted.”
“As an equal employment officer, I assure you that you did the right thing to file charges. You want this harassment to stop.”
We heard him clear his throat. “Yes, I like Lydia. I couldn’t understand why she wouldn’t leave me alone.”
“Did you tell her to?”
“Yes, on many occasions, but she was always man-handling me. You know, touching me when she’d walk by.”
Susie giggled, and Fran raised a brow, shaking a finger at me. “Bad girl,” she whispered.
The taped conversation continued.
“Touching,” Candy said. “Could you be more specific?”
“Yes. At first she’d brush up against me as if by accident, and when I let that happen a few times without saying anything, she got bolder.”
“Really? How terrible for you.” Candy’s voice showed concern. “When you say bolder, what exactly did she do?”
He sighed heavily. “Let me see. I’m trying to be as specific as I can. I don’t want to say anything that’s incorrect.”
“Take your time.”
After a moments silence he stated, “Well, she started dressing more provocatively I noticed—especially after hours when we were working late. She would take her jacket off, and have very little underneath. Just a snug top that would outline her boobs. She’d lean over me when I was working, making sure I could feel them, probably hoping I’d get excited.”
“I never did!” I thumped my fist on the table, “Ouch! That hurt. Just wait until I get my hands on him!”
Fran chuckled. “Seems like you already did!”
I tossed her an “eat shit and die” kind of look. She burst out laughing.
“Shush.” Susie said. “I’m trying to listen. This is really funny.”
“And did you?” Candy was asking if he’d gotten excited.
“A little. I couldn’t help it. I’m a man, not a neophyte. But I didn’t want it; I didn’t want to make love to her, her being my boss and everything. It would be awkward, so I tried to tell her that she was making me uncomfortable.”
We all hunched forward to get closer to the tape machine. I was gawking at it with disbelief. And blushing.
“What did she say when you told her this?”
“She laughed.”
Candy joined us at the table, looking immensely proud of the role she had played. She rolled her eyes when she heard her own voice.
“She laughed? How did you deal with that? Did you get angry?”
“A little. I got up and moved further away, but she followed me.” He cleared his throat. “She came right up and pressed herself against me. I was backed against the wall.”
“Did you push her off?”
“I wanted to, but she’s my boss. I wasn’t sure what to do.”
“I understand completely.” Candy had said soothingly. “I’m not condemning you. I just need to know what Lydia did next.”
“She kissed me. With her tongue.”
“I’m sorry if this sounds rude, but how did she get her tongue inside your mouth?”
“I guess I must have opened it. I don’t know.”
I sputtered, “This is a joke, right?”
“Shush. It gets better.” Candy touched my shoulder.
“That’s okay,” we heard her say. “How long did the kiss last? And what happened next?”
He swallowed audibly. “She started rubbing up against me, feeling my crotch, getting me hard.”
Candy giggled and elaborated for our benefit. “Right then, I glanced down and noticed his hands in his lap. I could see he was trying to hide the fact that he had a boner. It was all I could do not to crack up and point to the bulge in his pants.”
“God, Candy. How could you refrain from popping him?”
“Are you kidding me? It was hysterical.”
We continued to listen.
“Did you make love to her?” Candy asked.
“No. She made love to me. I tried to make her stop but she was tearing my shirt off, unzipping my fly, pushing me onto the desk and climbed on top.”
I could feel my face go crimson as the girls looked at me.
“That must have been quite an ordeal for you.”
If my face got any redder it would burst.
“Yes. It was my first time.”
I gasped. “No. He said that!” We were all giggling now, and Fran was snorting with laughter.
Candy asked him another question. “You mean your first time having sex in the office?”
“No. I mean the first time. I was a virgin.”
Candy clicked it off. And we all sat in stunned silence for half a second, shaking our heads.
“So there you have it. The poor man was a virgin.” I looked at my friends. “Can you believe he actually said that?”
Susie chortled. “What guy in his right mind would admit to that?”
It was so ridiculous I was no longer embarrassed. “I hope I was gentle with him.” I licked my lips. “There is nothing as stimulating as educating a virgin.”
We cracked up. Heads turned from every direction to see what was so funny.
“What else did I allegedly do?” I asked Candy.
“Oh, you’ve been very naughty this year, Lydia. No Santa gifts for you.”
“Oh, no. I was so hoping to replace Barnie.”
“Barnie?” Candy asked in confusion. “Who is that?”
My cheeks grew warm. “My e-bay buddy. It’s not a who, it’s a what.”
We all burst into more laughter and I realized how much I’d been missing out on not hanging with the girls.
“Not a chance, my girl.” Candy shook a finger at me. “You were not content just to have this poor man once; you had to use him again and again.”
“I did? I mean, I did.” I made a serious face. “He tried to fight me but I used my sexual prowess to tame him. I tied him down with a silk stocking, handcuffed him with my bra, used my panties to blind-fold him. And then I held him prisoner until I achieved at least three orgasms.”
Susie eyed me with more respect. “And everybody at the office thinks you’re such a tight ass.”
I smirked. “Tell you what. We are going to tail these two dick-wads until we catch them in the act, and then…”
They looked at me, waiting to hear what I’d s
ay next.
“And then I’m going to take this broom that’s been up my arse and deposit it somewhere else. Ted will be singing soprano for the ladies church choir.”
Fran chuckled. “I thought that was my job.”
* * *
The next day I had a dentist appointment for my routine check-up and cleaning, and once the hygienist had scraped all the nasty plaque away she pulled out my chart and wrote down some notes.
“You’re overdue for your x-rays. They seriously need to be done.” Linda Collins asked, “Do you have a few moments right now?”
“Yes, I guess I can spare the time instead of coming back.”
She put the heavy plastic shield over my chest and asked the routine questions. “Any change in your health since we saw you last?” She smiled. “Not pregnant or anything?”
My jaw slackened and I felt warmth flood my cheeks. “Actually, I am. Kind of.”
“You’re kind of pregnant?” Linda cried. “Lydia, no, pregnant? Who’s the lucky man?”
“There is no lucky man. I’m having a baby on my own.”
Doctor Rand walked by and poked his head in the door. “Did I hear right? You’re having a baby? Congratulations! So, you’re getting married. I bet your family is thrilled.” He came in to shake my hand.
“No, I’m not getting married. There is no man in this scenario.” I could feel myself getting mad. Why did I have to constantly defend myself? “Forget it. I don’t have time for x-rays.”
“Oh, we can’t x-ray you, not when you’re pregnant.” Linda said, smiling brightly with her perfect veneers.
Doctor Rand had a slightly confused look on his normally clever face. “I don’t get it,” he said. “There has to be a man at least for the conception phase.”
I stood up and threw the x-ray shield over my head and onto the chair. “What is hard to understand? There is no man,” I said slowly, dragging out each syllable. “All it required was one sperm. It didn’t even have to be a very good one.”
One of the other dental assistants stopped in the hallway, looking in. “Did I hear sperm? If it’s a joke, I want to hear.”
“Lydia’s pregnant,” Linda whispered, behind her hand. “But she doesn’t know whose sperm.”
The Candy Bar Complete - 4 book box set: Candy Bar Series Page 18