Her eyes popped open. “That’s ridiculous, Susie. You imagined what you saw. You can’t accuse people of doing things that you only see in your head.”
It made sense, I suppose, but I knew I was right about my father and the woman from down the street, just as I knew things about Melody without being told. I reached over and gave her hand a squeeze.
“Can I pour you another cup of tea before I leave?”
“That would be nice, Susie.”
As I poured her tea, I asked, “Are you feeling all right? You look so tired all the time.”
“I haven’t been myself lately.” Her hand trembled as she took her cup, spilling some of her tea. “Must be old age.”
“Get a checkup. When was the last time you saw a doctor?”
“I don’t remember.”
My eyes blurred, and then suddenly I saw a doctor’s chart, with her name on the top. Even though I didn’t want to read it, I was helpless as the vision cleared. Alzheimer’s disease? Shocked, I could barely breathe. She was my friend, my lifeline, and she was ill. Now, the tides had turned, and she needed me.
I forced some pep in my voice. “Please allow me to make the appointment for you.”
“I don’t remember the doctor’s name, but don’t worry. I’ll think of it soon.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Brett came for dinner while Melody took care of Billy. I’d stopped at a Greenmarket and bought some fruit and vegetables, and the fish market for fresh sea bass. Last, I hit the bakery department for a loaf of fresh bread and bagels, and splurged on a chocolate torte.
While I dragged my bags of groceries into the elevator, two women came in and held the door. I knew that Melody walked both their dogs. We greeted each other, and then one of the ladies asked for the time.
She glanced at her old watch. “I can’t find my Rolex anywhere. Don’t know where I put it, but I’m sure it’ll show up.”
Her friend answered, “That is too bad. I never take mine off except at night, or to shower.”
I listened to their comments, and my stomach started churning. Her Rolex was missing? Had she reported it to her insurance company or the police? The police—oh, crap!
Could Melody be involved? No! She wouldn’t do such a thing. She needed money, but not this way. She was too smart to do something that stupid. Wasn’t she?
I kept my eyes glued to the numbers above the doors, watching for my floor. I hated myself for what I was thinking, but how could I not. Melody couldn’t get buy on the chump change she made dog walking, and she knew our living arrangement was temporary at best.
Yet, the lady didn’t say anything about it being stolen, just figured she’d misplaced it. She wasn’t blaming anybody. So why was I thinking the worst of the girl I pretended to trust?
The elevator arrived at my floor and as the doors slid apart, they held them open and handed me my bags. The one whose watch was missing said, “Could you thank Melody for taking such good care of Winston while I was away? Tell her I’ll be sure to call when I need her again.”
“I will. Thanks.” My head was spinning. Obviously she didn’t suspect Melody of taking the watch. What kind of a friend was I to doubt her now?
I dumped the groceries in the kitchen, and Melody jumped up to help. While she emptied the bags and put everything in their proper place, I watched her, trying to figure out why my guts were stirring up trouble. I didn’t believe she would hurt someone who was good to her, so I gave her the message from the neighbor lady, but didn’t mention the missing watch.
Later, Melody left for Candy’s place, and even though I’d convinced myself she was innocent, I was relieved to see her go. I didn’t want to face her right now, afraid of what I might say.
I showered, put on some relaxing music, then began to organize dinner. I made a salad, prepared the sea bass for grilling, cooked two sweet potatoes, and put asparagus into a steamer. Then I opened a bottle of wine and sat down to wait. I glanced at my watch. I had ten minutes.
My fingers tapped on the table. Ten minutes. I thought about searching Melody’s room, my room really, to see if she had hidden a watch anywhere. Would that be a breach of trust on my part? Or would it be prudent to see if I was harboring a thief? At what point did the fine line between right and wrong mesh?
To hell with it. I marched into my study and looked under the pillows of the sofa bed, ran my hand behind and under the thin mattress, and found nothing but a pair of underwear. Her backpack was lying in the corner.
Should I look into it, and what if it were there? I’d told her the rules when she moved in with me. One breach of those rules and she’d be tossed out of here. In this case, with a police escort. I was stepping toward the backpack when I heard the downstairs buzzer. Brett was here.
Relieved, I ran to let him in. “Hey,” I grinned, holding his head and showering him with kisses. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you too.” His mouth was hungry. “Oh, baby, something smells good around here, and it must be you.”
Dinner was put on hold. He backed me into the bedroom, lifted me onto the bed, and made sweet love to me. I didn’t protest. I wanted him as much as he wanted me. Perhaps more so, because giving myself to Brett with great abandon, put all my worries to rest.
Later, we sat down to eat. I didn’t discuss my fears with him because I knew what he’d say, and it would cause dissention between us. I would be going away all too soon. I didn’t want to waste a second of it arguing over Melody.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
My father called, asking if I’d help out at his clinic for the busy holiday season. I normally was happy to oblige, but I didn’t want to be around him right now. I was still ticked about that neighbor lady.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I have so many things to do to prepare for my trip. I don’t have a moment to spare.”
“Come on, Susie. I’m sure you could use the extra money.”
“Of course, I could, but I simply don’t have the time.” I thought of Melody. “Dad, I know a young lady that is looking for a temp job. And she’s perfect.”
Melody could use the experience, and it would look good on her resume. Dog walker, ex-hooker, were not exactly plusses to future employment, but a receptionist in a reputable plastic surgeon’s office would give her a step up.
I had to convince Melody to take the studs from her face, which she did tearfully after I promised to let her loose in my closet. Like a child on Christmas morning, she ran into it, chucking clothes all over the place as if they were wrapping paper.
For several hours she enjoyed trying things on and discarding them on the floor, until she found the most adorable outfit to wear. The following morning I assisted her with her hair and makeup.
Instead of black eyeliner and blue shadow and those God-awful purple lips, I softly highlighted her pretty hazel eyes and translucent skin. She wore a dark brown pencil skirt that did great things for her behind, and a draped silk blouse which displayed her nice long neck and the perky curve of her breasts. High heeled Dolce & Gabbana pumps completed the ensemble.
She looked fabulous. I swear I wouldn’t have recognized her if we’d passed on the street. I sent her off with a hope and a prayer.
Melody was still at work when I returned home, and it was nice having the place to myself. She’d been camping out with me for three weeks now, and as much as I enjoyed her company, I also missed my alone time. It would be nice if this stint for Dad enabled her to get a decent job, and then she would be able to get a small place of her own. I cared about her well-being and wanted to make sure she would stay clean and on the right path, but I needed my own life too, and that included Brett.
He didn’t understand that by saving her, I was also saving myself. Both of us were good people, but on occasion we made bad choices. Hopefully, most of mine were behind me, but I certainly could empathize.
Melody had done nothing to make me regret my decision to trust her. I had sneaked a look into her backpack and had searche
d her room, and came up empty. So, I felt reasonably sure that she was on the up and up. Actually I thought she was behaving admirably well. I kept piling on extra responsibilities and she never complained. She tried hard to please me, and I recognized that trait—the people pleaser. I’d played that role my entire life. I was getting ready for my date with Brett when my father called.
“How did Melody work out?” I asked.
“You were right, my dear. She is a delightful girl. Quite marvelous on the phone, and with the patients. I must say she’s a great find.”
My mouth dropped open and slammed shut. He had to be kidding, right? I’d been terrified all day that she’d say or do something to give herself away.
“That’s nice, Dad.”
“Is she one of your friends?” His voice was full of warmth, the way I’d always hoped he’d speak to me. It was enough to make me choke.
“Sort of. I met her a few years ago—at the shelter.”
“The shelter? Oh, she was a volunteer. I see. Well, she is spectacular, I must say.”
My blood began to boil. He liked Melody, but he had never liked me. Melody—a girl even more tormented than myself. It was so frickin’ unfair. She was getting the esteem and the respect that belonged to me.
“I’m glad she worked out. If you’re that pleased with her, then you should keep her.”
“Why, yes. You are right. I should do that. I will have to see if she’s willing to stay on.”
“Thanks for calling, Dad.”
“Wait a sec. I nearly forgot the reason for the call.” He cleared his throat. “Your good friend Brett has skipped his last appointment and canceled the corrective surgery.”
“That’s weird. He never said anything about it to me.”
“I’ll try to hold open the scheduled date for the surgery until one of you gets back to me. He’s the most resistant patient I’ve ever seen. You’d think he’d want to have those unsightly scars fixed.”
“Yes, I know. I don’t understand it myself, but it doesn’t seem to bother him.”
“It needs attention, Susan. His scars will start to contract and get much worse.”
“I’ll tell him to call you.”
“Do that, and thanks again for sending Melody this way.”
I hung up, feeling as though I’d just been gutted. What did my father’s opinion matter, and why did I continue to seek his approval? I shut my eyes and tried to ward off the pain, but it sliced through me.
It was a relief, I told myself. Melody will have a good job, be able to move out, and I’ll have my place back to myself. The important thing was not to let my father hurt me anymore, or make me feel bad about myself.
* * *
When Brett came by to take me to dinner, tears blurred my vision and I practically threw myself into his arms.
“What’s the matter, hon?”
A tear slipped out. “It’s Melody. Dad needed someone to fill in for a few weeks as a receptionist. I normally do it, but I declined and sent Melody instead.”
“Well, that’s nothing to cry about, is it?”
“No. Yes. I don’t know.” I told him how my father thought she was frickin’ marvelous, and he just hugged me and rubbed my back, murmuring sweet words in my ear. “Thanks.”
I swiped at my eyes, and felt foolish for my meltdown. “It’s great, really. If he keeps her on she’ll be able to afford her own place.”
He smiled. “That is the best news I’ve heard in a while.”
I looked at him, and turned his cheek so I could see the scars. I ran my fingers over them gently and kissed them with tenderness. “So? You okay? Ready to go?”
“Brett. I have to ask you something.”
“Fire away.”
“Did you cancel your second surgery? Dad said you did.”
He gave a careless shrug. “Yeah, I decided I didn’t need it.”
“Why?” I jerked away from him, so I could look him in the eye. “Of course you need it, and more than one. This kind of facial reconstruction can take years.”
“Well, I cancelled, and that’s all there is to it.”
“Please don’t be stubborn. It’s very hard to get in to see Dad. He has a huge waiting list, and he’s made room for you. He is the best plastic surgeon in the city.”
“I’m sure he is. Now can we change this conversation?”
“Sure. It’s your face.” I marched out the door, and stalked over to the elevator and punched the button hard. He followed more slowly.
“Susie, give it a rest. This is me, the way I look, and you can either accept it or not. It’s up to you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He sighed. “It means that I’m not one of your ‘people projects’ that my sister told me about. She said you were always a defender of the underdog, picking up stray animals, or people, and bringing them home. She told me how you used to befriend the unpopular kids at school, like her.”
“That wasn’t why I hung out with her. I liked her.”
“She was pudgy and wore big bifocals. You were beautiful. I always thought it was an odd friendship. You could have hung out with the cool crowd, but you chose her.”
“I never liked the cool crowd. They were mean to everyone outside of their little group.”
“Susie. Why didn’t you go on your trip to Italy in September? You should be there, right now, instead of hanging around with me.”
“You know what happened. I postponed it until you got well.” I muttered under my breath, “What kind of a friend would I be if I’d just left?” I turned to glare at him. “I care about you deeply. I want to be with you until you’re a hundred percent well.”
“I am well. I’ve been out of the hospital for more than a month.” He glanced away. “I’m back to work. Life is good.”
I swallowed a hard lump in my throat. My stomach churned, and I knew I was about to be hurt. Not again. Please, not again. “Okay, you no longer needed me, but then Melody came along. I had to help her out, and you and I fell in love…”
“You stayed for the wrong reasons. For me. For Melody. When will you do something for yourself?” He shook his head in frustration. “I never wanted you to stay because of me. You should have gone to Italy like you’d planned. I wanted you to have the time of your life and live your dream.”
We were out on the street standing next to his truck. He turned, and the look on his face scared me to death.
“I am going. After Christmas. I’ve got my ticket and my reservations are made.” I tried to laugh but it was killing me. “You’ll be rid of me soon.”
“Susie. Dammit! I don’t want to get rid of you. But look at me. See my face. It’s not going to get any better. I’m always going to look this way.”
“No, you won’t. Dad will make it perfect.”
He closed his eyes and shook his head sadly. When he looked at me again, his eyes were full of darkness. “You are one of the prettiest girls I’ve ever seen. You are smart and talented and don’t even know it. The only poverty you’ve ever seen is from those you help.”
He smiled gently, and lifted a hand to stroke my cheek. “My old man was a cop, and I’m a scarred firefighter. I could never give you the things you’re used to. We come from different worlds. We view things differently.”
“Like what? We’ve never disagreed about anything other than Melody.”
“She’s the perfect example. You can’t help her, Susie. By giving her a home you’re not teaching her to be self-reliant. She doesn’t have to get her shit together if you take care of her.”
“But she is. She’s working and staying clean. She’s really trying, Brett.”
“You’ve got a good heart, Susie, but I’m afraid I’ve got a cop mentality. I see things in black and white. You see every color in between.” I smiled. “I like that.”
He wasn’t amused. “I don’t.”
I felt that fear again, only this time it ran deeper. “What? What are you saying?”
; He sighed. “Your parents are right in thinking I’m not good enough for you. I’m not in the same league.” He laughed. “I go bowling and you probably go to symphonies.”
“I hate symphonies. But I do adore ballet and theatre.”
“We’re not a match, Susie. I know you think you love Me, but you don’t. Once the newness wears off, you’ll look at me without those rosy glasses, and you won’t like what you see.”
He saw the stricken look on my face, and wiped a tear from the corner of my eye. “Aw, come on, Susie. Don’t look like that. You know it’s true. I’m just one of your strays.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
My heart ached and all the joy that normally bubbled inside of me seeped out. I felt flat. Deflated. Had I really fooled myself into thinking someone could love me for who I am? Foolish me!
“Why are you saying these things? Why are you doing this?”
“Come on, Sus, admit it. There is some truth to it, isn’t there?”
“No, of course not.” I crossed my arms under my breasts, trying to hold in the hurt. If he thought that about me, then he really didn’t know me at all.
“Then why are you so concerned about my scars?” He frowned. “Why can’t you just accept me as I am?”
“Because it will get worse, instead of better. The work has only just begun. You should want to get it fixed.” I could hear myself shriek, and tried to calm myself down. “This is not about me. It’s about you, and the rest of your life. Do it, bite the bullet, and get it over with, and you’ll be perfect again.”
“You’re the one who’s perfect, Susie. Look at you. Every feature, every inch of you. It’s obvious why you picked me, but you can’t befriend me, or treat me like an ugly but adored puppy.”
My eyes widened in shock. “I don’t. Now that we’re on the subject, though, what’s with the scars, anyway? Do you carry them around as a badge of honor? The all-American hero, and these are your battle scars?”
The Candy Bar Complete - 4 book box set: Candy Bar Series Page 42