by Lisa Childs
“Shawna…” He groaned her name. Then he pulled back and stood up.
Did he not want her touching him? Had he changed his mind about making love with her?
He didn’t walk away. Instead he kicked off his shoes and pushed down his pants and boxers. Then he stood gloriously naked before her.
But he was too far away. She held out her hands, silently pleading with him to come back to bed. Back to her…
She knew that would never happen. Six years had passed, and he had never once contacted her in all that time. If not for Xavier manipulating him, he wouldn’t have come back now. Remembering that should have brought her to her senses, should have made her stop. But she wanted him too much to deny that desire now that need.
He rooted around in his pocket before pulling out a condom packet. He tore it open and rolled it on his erection.
Seeing him in real life again, instead of just in her dreams, she tensed and wondered how they had ever fit together. He was so big. When they’d made love before, he would take his time with her, make sure she was ready. But they weren’t making love now. They weren’t in love. At least he wasn’t in love with her.
Would he just take her?
Instead of fear, excitement coursed through her. It had been so long, she didn’t care. She was ready for him.
But like all those times before, he made sure. When he joined her back on the bed, he kissed her tenderly and then with more heat. His tongue slid inside her mouth, and his fingers slid inside her body, teasing her, making her crazy. Making her ready.
She rose up from the mattress with a cry of frustration. She wanted him.
But he was moving away again, moving down her body. He replaced his fingers with his lips and his tongue. And the tension inside her shattered as an orgasm came over her. Then he was there, easing his erection inside her, and she arched and shifted until she could take him deep. Despite the six years that had passed, they moved together in perfect rhythm, a dance they’d danced several times.
It had been years since they’d danced together like this. Six long years since Shawna had been with him, since she’d been with anyone.
She had only ever been with Cole. He was the only man she’d ever wanted, that she had ever loved. And she loved him still. He’d broken her heart, but it still belonged to him. She poured that love into her kisses, into her touches…into her movements.
The tension wound tightly inside her again. His deep strokes set her off again, another orgasm shuddering through her body with an intensity she’d never known. Maybe it was just because it had been so long.
Or maybe it was just because it was Cole. The feelings she had for him were even deeper now.
He thrust again and then he called out as he came. For a few short seconds, he leaned his forehead against hers and stared into her eyes. She wasn’t certain what he was looking for.
Love?
Regret?
Guilt?
She felt all of those things for him. Most of all, she loved him. And she wanted to tell him. But was that fair? Sure, he would probably never return her feelings. He would never be able to forgive her for not telling him about Maisy. Hell, she would never forgive herself for that.
Maybe it was better that he hate her anyway. The killer after her was determined, so determined that he was probably destined to succeed. It would be easier for Cole if he didn’t know how she felt about him, that she loved him, that she’d never stopped loving him.
She tensed as a sudden thought occurred to her. Was that what he had been doing for her six years ago? Instead of breaking her heart, had he been trying to protect it, like he’d always tried to protect her?
He’d told her, had warned her, that his missions kept getting more and more dangerous. Had he thought he wouldn’t make it back from that one? Was that why he’d broken up with her?
He had made it back, though.
But she’d already been married to another man. Regret slammed through her, stopping her heart for a millisecond. That could have been why he acted so betrayed. Maybe he had only been trying to protect her, and he thought she’d moved on, that she’d never really cared.
She wanted to tell him the truth, wanted to tell her that she never had a real relationship with Emery. But she couldn’t do that to him—not now. Not when she was in so much danger. No. It was better for him to hate her. Still.
It was better that he not know that she loved him. That she had always loved him. She closed her eyes, so that he wouldn’t see it, wouldn’t see the love.
When she opened her eyes again, even though only seconds had passed, he was gone. Not far; she could hear him in the attached bathroom. But realistically, he’d been gone for six years, and he still wasn’t back. Despite them making love, he was still gone from her.
When he walked back into the bedroom, she pretended she was sleeping. He didn’t join her anyway. She could hear the floor creaking as he paced before the windows, protecting her just as he’d promised he would. He didn’t crawl into bed and take her into his arms. He didn’t hold her like he used to after they made love.
And she knew it didn’t matter what she told him; he didn’t return her feelings. She’d killed whatever love he’d felt for her when she’d married another man. And even if she lived, she wasn’t certain he would ever forgive her or come to love her again. So it was good that she hadn’t told him the truth.
She only hoped she wouldn’t wind up carrying the secret of her love to her grave.
*
Cooper breathed a sigh of relief as he squinted against the sun shining brightly through the blinds in Xavier’s den. It was morning, edging toward noon actually.
And that was good.
The person they’d been hired to protect and all of Cooper’s team had survived the night. He glanced over at Manny who looked a little worse for wear, but the concussion was slight. It was hardly affecting him other than what was probably a hell of a headache. But Manny was too proud to admit he was in any pain.
Unfortunately so was Cole. If he’d admitted how much this assignment would affect him, Cooper would have never taken it. But then if something had happened to Shawna—and without their protection, it most certainly would have—Cole would have been in even more pain, emotionally.
Of course, Cooper suspected he was also in danger physically. He looked over the desk at the old man sitting behind it. Xavier had made a horrible mess of this assignment and of his grandson’s life. Regret hung heavy on him, though, making his shoulders stoop with the burden of it. He already knew what Cooper thought of his manipulation. Now Cooper wished he hadn’t said anything at all.
It didn’t matter, though. Nothing mattered but finding the killer and stopping him. “So it has to be someone in this house,” Cooper surmised. “Someone in your family.”
The old man nodded. “And they all live here.”
Cole didn’t. But he was still in the house. He’d ignored Cooper’s orders to return to River City the night before, but he had to see that he couldn’t stay here. He couldn’t remain on this assignment. If the killer learned how Xavier had changed his will, Cole would be in even more danger than Shawna was.
And he couldn’t protect her and their daughter if he was dead.
A chill chased over Cooper’s skin, making him shudder. It was his damn sixth sense again. He’d started getting what his mom had, the ability to just know when something bad was about to happen. He had that feeling now more intensely than he’d ever felt it before.
Something bad—something very bad—was about to happen.
“We need to get Cole out of here,” Cooper said. But he wasn’t talking to Xavier. He was talking to Manny. He had a feeling they might have to physically remove Cole in order to get him to leave.
“He’s gone.” It was Lars, standing in the open door to the den. “He left his room a while ago.”
“Where the hell did he go?” Cooper asked.
Lars shrugged. “I don’t know. He took off down t
he back stairs, so I figured he was going to the kitchen.” The blond giant tensed, as if he had the same premonition as Cooper. Or maybe he just picked up on Cooper’s concern. “But he wasn’t there.”
“We need to find him!” Cooper said.
Before it was too late—if it wasn’t already.
Chapter 15
The sun shone down on Cole, warming his skin on the outside. But he was still cold inside. At least he wanted to be cold. He wanted to be numb. Instead he felt too much.
Shawna made him feel too much. Last night. In the bathroom and the bedroom…
He’d felt so much desire, so much passion. But then after she’d fallen asleep, he’d felt something even more. All the love he’d always had for her surged through his heart again, and he’d been overwhelmed.
And scared.
He understood now why she’d had the urgent need to get some air the night before. But Cole had forced himself to wait until morning before he’d stepped out into the hall. Lars and Dane had just been switching posts. So she had a fresh guard in Dane, or as fresh as any of them could be after a sleepless night. But they’d all endured sleepless nights before, a lot of them in far more dangerous places than his grandfather’s estate.
“You get any rest?” Lars had asked him.
Cole had just shaken his head and hurried down the back stairs before either friend could ask him more questions. And before Maisy could wake up.
He wanted to see her, but he wasn’t sure he could trust himself around her. She was bound to notice how he would look at her—with wonder, with awe, with love.
He didn’t know her, but he loved her. She was part of him. But that wasn’t why he loved her. He loved her because she was part of Shawna. Even if she hadn’t been his, he would have come to love her just because of that.
Knowing she was his made him want to claim her to the world but most especially to her. He wanted her to know that she hadn’t lost her daddy, at least not her only one. He wanted her to know that he was her daddy, too. That he would do his best to fill the hole Emery Little’s death had left in her young life.
But would she want him? Would she want another father at all, let alone him?
He didn’t know what to do, how to act. His father had loved Cole, but he’d never been around that much, between his businesses and his other activities. Cole hadn’t even known about Natalie. Why had his father never told him about his true love and how he’d lost her? Had he felt responsible for her death? Had he felt guilty?
There were things like that in Cole’s past that he would never be able to tell Maisy. Even when she was older, he wouldn’t tell her about his missions, about the dangers he’d faced. The dangers that, as a bodyguard, he continued to face.
Was it fair for him to tell Maisy he was her father only to leave her life just as Emery had? Not that Cole had any intention of dying now. He’d survived all sorts of dangerous missions. Surely, he could survive his bodyguard assignments, as well.
Except for maybe this one.
This one—thanks to his grandfather—was his most dangerous yet. So maybe he should wait to tell Maisy that he was her father. Maybe he should wait until they had identified and apprehended the killer.
Who could it be? His family was ruthless and greedy. But which one of them was ruthless and greedy enough to kill? Or maybe it wasn’t just one. Maybe it was a couple of them acting together. His male cousins? Or the twins? They were female, but they were tall and strong. One of them could have knocked out Astin and Manny and wrapped that noose around Shawna’s throat. Or perhaps it was his uncles, who’d grown tired of waiting for their father to die.
He tensed as he realized that in order for anyone to inherit anything, his grandfather had to die. Of course he was already eighty-six and not in the greatest of health since his heart attack. But…
Was that what this was about? The only reason someone would try to eliminate other heirs would be because they were pretty damn certain they were about to inherit. Maybe they thought Xavier would have another heart attack. It was damn well a possibility if something happened to Shawna. Either he would die of grief or because there would be no one to stop him indulging all his vices.
The change to Grandfather’s will hadn’t put just her in danger. It put Cole in danger, as well.
Just then, he noticed a flash.
The sunlight was glinting off something metallic. No sooner had he realized that the metallic thing was a gun than the shot rang out.
And he had no doubt the bullet was headed right toward him.
*
Maisy screamed and jerked away from Shawna, who’d been pulling a dress over the little girl’s head. Shawna held in her own cry of alarm. She’d heard it, too, and had felt the windows rattle from the sharp noise.
Nikki jumped out of the chair where she’d been slumped in exhaustion, close to the bed. Suddenly very awake and alert, her hand automatically reached for her weapon.
“Was that a bomb, Mommy?” Maisy asked, her little body trembling with fear. “Was that another bomb?”
Shawna shook her head. “No. That wasn’t a bomb.”
“What was it?”
“I—I don’t know…” But she knew, as she watched Nikki draw her weapon from her holster, that it had been a gunshot. Another shot rang out and another.
Maisy screamed again.
Fear coursed through Shawna. But she wasn’t being fired at. While the shots were close enough to rattle the windows, the bullets hadn’t shattered the glass. The gunshots weren’t being fired into the house. The shots came from outside the house, but close by.
“Where—where’s Cole?” she asked Nikki in a whisper. When she’d awakened, she hadn’t seen him. Had he gone to another room or had he left the estate entirely?
“He went downstairs just a little while ago,” Nikki murmured as she peered through the window.
And Shawna knew those shots had been fired at Cole.
“Is Cole okay, Mommy?” Maisy asked fearfully, all of her concern for a man she’d just met. She didn’t even know that he was her father.
At least Shawna didn’t think she knew. It was hard to say what the intuitive little girl had picked up on. She often eavesdropped on adult conversations and might have heard one of the Bentlers speculating about her paternity. Did she know Cole was her daddy? Is that why she was so worried that he was in danger?
Shawna pulled her daughter into her arms to comfort her. But if Cole had been shot, she would need comforting, too. She needed Cole. She’d needed him when she’d lost her parents. She didn’t know how she would have survived without his friendship and support. She’d needed him six years ago, too, when he’d broken up with her. She’d needed him to help raise their daughter. But he hadn’t been around, and she’d managed.
But that had been different because she’d known that he was still alive and well.
Even as angry as she’d been with him, she had never wished him any harm. She’d prayed during every one of his deployments that he would survive his mission. She hadn’t realized then that the most danger he might face would be protecting her.
He had to be okay.
*
Xavier heard the gunshot. It was close to the house, close to his den. He jumped up from his chair, but his head swam and he had to plant his palms on his desk to steady himself.
It was hell getting old. Since his damn heart attack, he couldn’t stand up quickly without getting light-headed. Or maybe it was because he’d hardly slept last night for all the thoughts and fears racing through his mind. What had he done?
Cole didn’t give a damn about the money. He didn’t want it. Neither would Shawna. Xavier had been crazy to change his will. It hadn’t brought Cole and Shawna back together like he’d planned. All it had accomplished was to put them in danger. Poor Emery Little had died. And Shawna and Astin had nearly died the day before.
More gunshots rang out. Who the hell was firing and at whom? Had a bullet struck someone?
> He needed to go check. He needed to make sure nobody was hurt. But he had a bad feeling that someone was and he knew who. And it wasn’t Shawna. After last night, no Payne Protection bodyguard would have allowed Shawna to step outside the house again.
So that left Cole.
Had the others found him? They’d rushed out of the den to search for him just minutes before that first gunshot rang out. It was almost as if Cooper Payne had somehow known Cole was in danger. But of course he had, he’d already warned Xavier that his manipulations had put his grandson in danger.
Had Cole survived all those damn dangerous missions only to get killed at home? Xavier had been a fool to bring him back here—to put his life at risk.
That bad feeling spread to Xavier’s chest and radiated down his arm. And then it wasn’t just bad. It was painful.
Oh, damn…
He was having another heart attack. And he’d been warned that he was too old, his heart too damaged, to handle another one.
But hell, maybe that was karma after all the trouble he’d caused, and not just now for Cole and Shawna. He’d caused a hell of a lot of trouble in his eighty-six years. His troublemaking had cost him marriages, friendships, a business partner and the love of his life. Yeah, this was probably karma.
He clutched at his chest as if he could somehow hold his heart together. But if Cole had been shot, there would be no fixing it. And if Cole was dead, Xavier didn’t care about himself.
He didn’t call out, not that he had much time before his legs folded beneath him and he dropped to the floor.
Chapter 16
Pain radiated from Cole’s shoulder. He rolled it and winced as the bruised muscle rippled beneath his skin.
“Were you hit?” Manny asked anxiously.
Cole shook his head. “I’m fine. I just hit my shoulder when I dove out of the way.” He studied the hole in the brick wall of the house. He’d been standing close to where the first bullet had burrowed into the mortar between the bricks. Other bullets had chipped into the wall, but those hadn’t gotten as close. He wasn’t certain if the shooter was a bad marksman or if he’d chickened out.