by Jack Crosby
Ignoring my quip, “Those bastards have a women tied up. I did not see the any spirit inside, but it seems they were getting ready to violate her. We must act now and squash the life out of those fuckers!”
Seeing her eyes burn, I knew it was time to get going. Roxanne was all about defending women and these two had crossed the line. I grabbed my scythe, Leviathan and brought it to life. Normally, it looked like a harmless, polished piece of wood. Right now, it looked like the death bringer (if you haven’t caught on yet, terrible puns are my thing – you’ve been warned) it truly was.
We quickly ran into the office, surprising the two now partially nude demons. The woman looked in bad shape with bruises and cuts all over her. Roxanne already had out her gun and was unloaded a special clip of demon killing bullets. The first demon was taking it straight to the face, but the second one ducked out and tried to leave out the back.
I crossed the room, avoiding the mad woman’s gun fire and followed out the back. Between trying to pull his pants back up and running, this wasn’t going to be hard. I formed a chain in my left hand and whipped it towards his feet. The Greed demon didn’t have a chance. A scream and a smack on the pavement was all he could muster.
Walking up to him, “Oh, you’ve done it now. You know who that crazy lady is, don’t ya?”
His barely human façade dropped, revealing the disgusting greenish-yellow demon he really was. Sniveling, “Do not let Lilith’s daughter near me! We were not violating any laws!”
I smacked him with the butt of my scythe. “You were about to rape a mortal! What the hell do you mean you weren’t violating any laws asshole?!”
He seemed genuinely shocked. “A mortal? That was no ordinary mortal!”
“I might look dumb, but really I’m not. You’ve got two seconds to give me the explanation of your pathetic lifetime.”
Shaking with fear, “The whore called us to her. She is a witch! This was her doing!”
Witches, I had experience with that. I wasn’t ready to believe a lying scumbag demon though. “Why should I believe that?”
“Because she was trying to use the small spirit as a sacrifice! Once we laid with her, she would gather enough sexual magic to mix with the blood magic to bring Lilith to the mortal realm!”
I needed to find out if this was the truth, fast. Lilith was not one I’d ever want to see walking on Earth. Grabbing the demon, “C’mon, let’s find out if you’re telling me the truth.”
I dragged him back into the building and sure enough Roxanne and the women were having a heated argument. I looked down at the demon who half shrugged at me. “I told you so.”
Tossing him on the ground, “Shut the fuck up.”
The two women heard the commotion and looked back at us. Roxanne pointed with all the hatred in the world at the woman. “This wench is a witch!”
“So I’ve been told.”
The witch, still tied up, was no longer looking in peril, but seemed to be enjoying this. “So the mighty Death does walk this mortal realm! Come, take me and fill me with your seed!”
This bitch was crazy. “Ummm, no thanks. In fact, it seems you’ve lost here, so I’m going to need you to calm down and tell us what the hell is going on.”
She started laughing hysterically. “Hahaha! My work will not be done until I raise my queen, Lilith!”
Roxanne slapped her hard across the face. “My mother will stay right where she is! You only get to deal with that bitch’s daughter!”
The witch’s eyes lit up. “Yes, you are of my queen’s lineage! How wonderful!”
“Enough talk about this,” I looked back and saw the Greed demon trying to crawl back out, “and where do you think you’re going?”
He tried to speed up his escape, but his usefulness was at an end. I drove my scythe right into his back and ripped it apart. Greenish demon goo came oozing out and the Greed demon fizzled into a greasy spot on the floor. Turning back to the witch, “I want to know where the abducted spirit is.”
Her face turned angry again. “That one’s fate is soon coming to an end. There is nothing either or you two dumb fucks can do.”
Before I could question her more, Roxanne put the gun right up to her face and blasted it off. Nothing like getting nowhere and being showered in brain matter to make a night great.
Chapter 3 – Cat Out of the Bag
“You killed our only lead!”
“I most certainly did not! You killed the Greed demon and he would’ve been much easier to interrogate. That witch bitch wasn’t going to give us anything.”
As I wiped brain bits from my hair, all I could do was stare incredulously at Roxanne. “You blew her head off her shoulders because she pissed you off.”
“Yes, that is exactly why. The bitch should’ve learned to speak to the daughter of Lilith before she mouthed off.”
This was going nowhere fast. Roxanne wasn’t about to admit she shit the bed, so we needed to think of another clue. “Where do we go from here?”
She just kept smiling. “Oh this should be easy Derrick.”
It wasn’t. I hated being left in the dark. “Well why don’t we cut the chase and just have you enlighten me?”
She leaned in close to me ear and almost began purring. “It’s simple; the angel who sent us on this job obviously knows more. Don’t tell me you didn’t pick that up?””
Damnit, even when making a valid point, she had to ooze sexual energy. “Why do you do this to me?”
“Because it is fun.” She had the nerve to lick my ear. “But, as much as I’d like to take care of that growing cock in your pants, we must find this spirit. She said small one, so chances are it is helpless.”
“Wonderful, a lost and potentially useless spirit to find; just another joy of the job.” Boom, total mood killer. “Let me call Khloros and we can head back to the office.”
It didn’t take long for my best friend to pick us up. The entire ride back to the office he complained about not being able to get any action and how our reckless killing of potential leads.
“You two are too quick to kill! Damnit, I know your name is Death,” we were at a stop light but his engine was revving up, “but use common sense! And you!” The passenger seat starting going crazy on its own, making Roxanne start to scream. “When will you not let that temper of yours get the better of you?”
Neither of us said anything, having been scolded by a car is a real ego killer. When we pulled into the office, we got out and hurriedly made our way inside.
“Wow, I’ve never seen him like that.”
Oh I have. “Trust me, the term high horse probably originated with him.”
We walked through the office and back into the small living area. Sitting on our couch was the beautiful blonde angel, Veronica. She got up, “Hello you two. How are things progressing?”
With angels, surprise sorta goes out the window. “Things aren’t progressing. The docks turned into a massacre as we ran across a witch and two Greed demons. Turns out this abducted spirit is in a lot more trouble than we thought.”
If this information was new to her, she sure didn’t seem like it. “That is most unfortunate.”
“Unfortunate? Did you know about this before you gave us the file?”
Roxanne was rightfully pissed, but it wouldn’t do any good to yell at her. “You need to tell us everything.”
“Oh where to begin?” She got this sad, despondent look on her face which matched her voice. “I came to the two of you because I knew you would not judge me.”
“Umm, that doesn’t sound good.”
“It is not Derrick.”
She plopped down on the couch, looking like she might cry. Roxanne’s anger immediately went away and she went into nurturing mode. “Oh my darling, what happened?”
“I found the spirit after my return to Earth. I could tell it had fought to get away from its captors and I tried my best to hide it until I could get it back home safely. The witch found it and stole it out fr
om under me.”
Hurray, another twist. “What is so special about this particular spirit?”
“When I found her, she refused to take her natural shape, she stayed as a small feline.”
Shit. Shit, shit, shit. “You mean to tell me you found a Nyx and you didn’t put it down?”
Both women looked at me appalled. Roxanne just shook her head in disgust while Veronica explained. “It is just an innocent. I could not end the life of something so tender and precious.”
Okay everyone, sit down. Depending on the situation, a Nyx could be an honest to Almighty nightmare. Their cat spirits, probably descending from the Lust demon family, that exude all kinds of sex. A decade or two back, a few of them went on a killing spree, seducing men and then eating them after the deed was done. From that point on, they were placed on the celestial watch list and their kingdom closed off.
Honestly, I shouldn’t be judging an entire race by the deeds of a few. I mean after all the Nyxes left Hell to live in peace, but that was millennia ago. Who knows what they’re like today.
“When that thing gets its bearing and goes on a murderous sex spree, this’ll be on you.” I sat on the chair and crossed my arms angrily. Granted I had two beautiful women sitting across from me, so my anger was mostly for show, but still.
“We have a much more serious problem.” Both Veronica and I looked at Roxanne. What could be worse? “The witch was going to use the Nyx as a sacrifice to bring Lilith to Earth.”
“She’s dead now, no big deal.”
“Don’t you understand, in her own body, Lilith would be as bad as Beelzebub. Summoned into the body of a Nyx…”
It was Veronica’s turn to freak out. “We cannot allow that to happen!”
My headache was growing. “Any ideas on where the witch would’ve kept the cat? If they were doing the ceremony in that office, wouldn’t the creature have been there?”
“How do we know that was the real ceremony? What if it was just a diversion?”
“This night’s about to get worse isn’t it?”
Both the girls got up. As Veronica made her way to the backdoor, “We need to go to the local coven. If witches are involved, chances are we will find our culprit there.”
“It’s a good thing I don’t need sleep.”
As she opened it, another figure was standing there, the Arch-Angel Michael. Veronica instantly dropped to one knee. “Michael, I am yours to command.”
He motioned for her to get up and made his way inside. He waved to me and Roxanne, as if we were old friends. In his deep, oddly soothing voice, “Nice little place. The smells of the Italian restaurant two doors down must be wonderful.”
“They make a killer calzone.”
“I am sure they do Horseman, however tasty Italian cuisine is not the reason for my visit. Veronica, we must talk.”
She swallowed hard. “Is everything okay?”
“You must have known as soon as we discovered the Nyx’s survival, this would happen.” His face dropped.
So did Veronica’s. “I know and I accept the consequences. I do not regret my choice.”
He smiled at this. “Do not see this as a punishment, but an opportunity. I believe in you.”
Michael placed his hands on Veronica’s shoulders. Their wings shimmered into existence as power flowed through both of them. After a moment, Veronica’s started to shrink. Pain was etched on her face and as much as I wanted to help, there wasn’t a damn thing I could do.
Then it stopped. No longer were her wings big and white, they were small and green. Tears were openly flowing down each of their faces. Michael leaned in and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “Your heart is pure and your soul is strong.”
“I will not let you down.”
“I know.” Without another word he turned and left out the backdoor.
Roxanne, not holding back anymore, ran over to her. “What just happened to you?”
Veronica tried to put on a brave face. “I broke the rules and so I was punished, though it could have been much worse for me.”
Roxanne embraced her in a hug. As the two girls comforted each other (though I wasn’t sure why Roxanne was crying), I got my first full view of the small, green wings now on her back.
“You’re wings?” I didn’t mean to point, as that’s rude, but I couldn’t help it. “What happened?” In all my vast years of existence, I’d never seen wings like that.
“These friends, they are the wings of an exile.”
Chapter 4 – Witches by the Coven
The car ride was a rather quiet one. Roxanne and Veronica were in the back seat, neither one talking. I knew Roxanne felt guilty, as she now had beautiful wings and Veronica didn’t. Even Khloros kept his mouth shut, which some might proclaim a miracle.
When we reached the old brickstone house that apparently was the coven of the local witches, nothing jumped out at me. It seemed to be an old house that looked abandoned. Magic wasn’t in the air nor was there any smells of brimstone. Witches tended to try to bring demons into the world, so brimstone was usually a dead give-a-way. To be honest, since coming here, I hadn’t heard much of any witch activity before the one we ran into earlier.
The girls hung back while I walked up to the door. I was going to knock, but the wood was rotten and it was practically falling to the ground. Not only that, but the air reeked of shit, like someone forgot to flush the toilet. It was downright disgusting.
“Derrick, what’s wrong?”
I turned around, “You mean besides the overwhelming shit smell? What’s wrong is that this place has nothing magical about it.”
Roxanne looked concerned. She bent over and picked up a small stone and chucked it at the door. She nearly hit me, but when it went to hit the door, it disintegrated like nothing. “They put up a magical ward, a really advanced one. This is Hell magic.”
That didn’t sound good. “How do we get around it?”
“Don’t worry your pretty little head; you have a denizen of Hell with you. I can enter and break it.” She sounded confident but something was bothering her. “Once inside, everyone must be on high alert.”
Without hesitation, she walked up the steps and crossed the threshold. She didn’t get zapped and motioned for us to follow. I wasn’t quite as confident, but Veronica and I crossed with no problems. With the barrier down, the static of magic was buzzing in the air and brimstone by the boatload was floating around.
“I guess those bitches put up the ward and the smell to keep people away.”
“Fortunately, we have you.” I put my hand on her arm. “Why don’t you take the lead on this one?”
“Are you sure?”
I smiled, “Of course, let’s go kick some witch ass and get back the lost Nyx.”
“We are also in luck.” Veronica spoke for the first time. “With the sun coming up, their dark magic will be weakened.”
It was so late it was early. Sure enough, the dark sky was starting to give way to the earliest moments of dawn. “Sounds good to me, let’s go.”
We crossed the foyer and went to the back of the house. Still no signs of life, but there was a back door that led downwards. Go figure, typical witches were doing everything in the basement. How cliché of them.
Roxanne pulled out her gun and I reached in my jacket and pulled out Leviathan. “Veronica, you got any weapons?”
“I do not know if I still have access.” She held out her hand and in a bluish blaze, a sword appeared. “I guess it is still mine to command.” The long silvery sword emitted a light white glow.
“Lead the way baby.”
Roxanne slowly walked down. The lower we got, the more apparent it became we were in the right place. We heard women screaming and weird chanting going on. As we climbed the last staircase, the coven appeared in front of us.
It was like a dream come true, almost. We’d just walked into a giant orgy. Naked women were lying everywhere, pleasuring themselves and each other. They didn’t even see us com
e in as most were nose deep in another’s goods.
There were a few lesser demons pleasuring themselves or partaking in threesomes. They noticed our presence right way, but Roxanne snapped her fingers and each one put their head down in obedience. In demon hierarchy, the daughter of Lilith was some pretty impressive shit.
One of the witches unfortunately came up for air long enough and she saw us. She didn’t know us from Dick Blow, so she wasn’t nearly as impressed with our arrival as the demons were. With as much dignity as one covered in witch’s brew could, “We have intruders!”
The massive orgy came to a halt. Another yelled, “Kill the fuckers! They desecrate our sacred space!”
I wasn’t having any of it, not now. Leviathan came to life in a blaze of glory and I cut the two closest witches down. Nothing stops a rampage quite like intestines spilling on to the floor. Both of the dead witches crumpled over and Roxanne added two bullets to their head for good measure. You can never be too careful with them.
“I am Death, oldest and most powerful of the Horsemen! So much as look at myself or my companions wrong and I will reap your souls!”
I smelled the awful smell again. Ah damnit, I think a few actually shit themselves. The ones that weren’t defecating started begging for forgiveness.
I swiped my scythe towards them, “No more talk, just listening! I came across a witch tonight who stole a Nyx from my friend. She was planning to raise Lilith with the help of two Greed demons. Someone better start talking and fast.”
A witch from the back started sniveling. “Moria and Dominica were working together. We did not approve their plan and they left the coven just after nightfall.”
“Where did they go?”
Another witch piped up. With their lives on the line, they were quite chatty. “They likely went to the old coven house. We left that place after entrapping a Pride demon there.”
This is why witches were so much damn trouble. “A Pride demon, really? Don’t tell me you tried to raise one of those…”
“It was too strong for us. We trapped it in a circle a decade ago, before Moria and Dominica joined the coven. They replaced our two fallen members.”