His teeth ground together, and his insides shook with rage. “Samara! Mom left because you threatened her. You hurt her! You belong in this place if you think that’s okay and the way to handle things. People don’t play with knives and pull them on other people. I used to think you collected them because it made you seem tough—like a tomboy or something, since you lived in a house with all males. But that’s not it—you really are sick.”
“Says the man with a seriously debilitating disability.” She smirked and started holding up her fingers one at a time as if she was mimicking him and his numbers he’d count when really agitated.
He frowned, and his heart plummeted. Every nerve in his body was urging him to slap her, but he refused. That was her way, only with sharp blades. “Daniel’s not right for you, and if you think he is, then you’re the one that’s deluded.”
“Big words, huh? Yeah—go ahead. I’ve seen you pull them out when you’re debating intellectual issues with Dad. This isn’t something you can think through, though. It’s real life. It’s feelings, it’s raw and it’s brutal. Life. Is. Brutal. Adam. And I protected you from it.” Her fingernails were back to digging into the tree trunk. Veins stuck out in her neck as her nostrils flared.
“I know,” he said, his voice soft. “It’s all about feelings, and Mari and I are married now. We love each other more than life itself. And your idea of protection is what surrounded me with violence. I mean—my wedding day, my bride had blood on her dress, because of you.” He shoved his fists into his pockets so he wouldn’t punch her.
“Daniel wasn’t supposed to use a gun,” she said, like that explained it all and made it okay.
“Fuck you, Samara. You can rot here. You’re lucky Mom forgives you and wants anything to do with you, because I sure don’t. As far as I’m concerned—I no longer have a little nugget of a sister. She’s gone.” He turned and left her there, clinging to the tree.
It was the only roots she had now, because he was convinced his mom would have to leave her behind eventually, too.
Sam was deranged, violent and beyond help.
He grabbed his mother’s hand on the way out and refused to look back at his sister.
No longer his little nugget at all. Just a stranger—with a heart blacker than her nails and crazy hair.
Chapter 19
Adam woke Mari several times that night. He’d whimper, and his arms would lash out wildly. He’d clutch her to him and then almost lay on top of her before he could get back to sleep. And that smothering he did to her, for some stupid reason, turned him on.
She let him seduce her three times during the night. Each time he was more frantic than the last—speaking to her in a low, possessive way like he was willing her to never leave him.
Her touch reassured him more than her words did.
It was morning now, and she lay there combing her fingers through the back of his hair. There was some dampness from his night-terrors and sweating.
“Mari? I think I wanna go home to our new place. I’m done with Europe,” he said softly.
“You sure? What about your mom? I figured we could spend the rest of the week here, then we’d move on to Spai—”
“No. I can’t be here anymore. There’s too much sadness. I feel guilty, like I should be with Samara since she says this is all my fault—that she did it all for me,” he explained. His fingers twitched on the pillow, and he stared at her with the saddest eyes imaginable. He couldn’t help it. There were parts of him inside that felt broken because of his sister.
“She has no idea what she’s talking about. She chose to handle things this way—not you. Ignore her. She shouldn’t be able to spoil you reconnecting with your mom,” Mari said. “Screw her!”
“I wish I could think that way, but Mom’s not sure what to do about me. She didn’t invite me. She didn’t even have time to prepare, and I think she wants me to see my biological father, Thomas.”
“You don’t want to see him?”
“No. He’s not my dad—Dustin is.” He reached out and stroked along her cheekbone, and it drifted back into her hair at the temple.
“Okay. We can head back. Our apartment’s a mess anyway. It needs a lot of work.” She snorted a little.
“What? It’s not that bad.”
“After dealing with my dad’s place, you’re right—it’s not a big deal, but for some reason it feels daunting.”
“If we have a bed we can use for sex, then I don’t care how messy our house ever is,” he said, smiling, his eyes tired.
“Never say that to the daughter of a hoarder,” she teased. Her hand yanked at the roots of his hair. It was silly how their arms were both crossing and in each other’s hair, but this was them.
“I’m not worried about it—you don’t have any more clutter than anybody else,” he said.
He kissed her, and before they got up and started packing and making arrangements to get back to the states, he pulled her under him.
It would be a long flight, and he needed her more than ever.
His fingers were careless, gripping into her so hard he would probably leave marks, but he needed more—deeper, harder, faster.
He breathed harsher than he ever did at the gym. In fact, he sounded like a motor was pushing him further, making him power into her.
My God, she was so wet, he could feel a damp spot under her already when his legs moved. “You’re the only good home—the only one that matters. That’s why my dick always seeks you out.”
She smiled. “Good to know.” She wiggled under him and spread her legs wider. “God, you feel amazing.”
“I know—because I’m sorer than ever and inside you as deep as I can go. That always feels good for both of us.” He nipped at her bottom lip, then sucked it in and nibbled on it.
She giggled until he cupped the back of her head, threading his fingers through her hair and fisting at the roots. He pulled her hair, yanking her head where he wanted it to go and pushed his tongue in her mouth as far as he could, devouring her—the same way his dick was with her pussy. His other hand took her breast and squeezed it as hard as he could without really harming her.
He growled. Good groping like this made his dick twitch. So, he squeezed her breast again.
She moaned and gripped him like she wanted more. Her legs wrapped around his hips, and she tipped her pelvis up.
Well, that was nicer than before. He found another, much better position with his dick by angling his hips differently, and now he truly was as deep as possible while being on top of her.
He pulled away from the heart-stopping kiss she was returning, and he dropped his head, taking her right nipple between his lips. Somehow, he found a way to rub his lips back and forth over it, making it elongate and tighten. When it was completely puckered, he lathered it with his tongue. Was this going to feel a little bit to her like it did to him when his dick was this hard and wet by her? He hoped so.
He sucked and groaned. Sucked and groaned. Sucked and groaned until he couldn’t take it any longer.
“Mari, you want to come—I can feel it. And I want that, too, so I want you to do me a favor.”
She looked at him like he had to be joking, because he was still fucking her with an urgency that said he’d come any second now.
“When I’m about to give you my seed, I’ll kiss you over your heart. That means give me your love and you come at the same time, and that also means you say my name when you come apart. Understand?”
Her eyes went wide and lit up. She nodded while still gripping his shoulders tight.
He dropped down onto her, hovering his lips above her racing heart. Almost there. A few more tight thrusts, and he’d make a mess in her.
He rubbed her nipples with his, using small motions.
“Oh, God, Adam!” she said on a breathless exhale, and she twitched around his dick.
Shit! She was coming already? No!
He bit over her heart, then kissed it. “I love you, but you’re supp
osed to wait!”
“Fuck! I can’t! So wet—and you’re huge, and I can’t!” She cried out a second later and was completely enveloped by her orgasm. “Adaaaaammmmm!”
The sound of his name swept through him, and he was swallowed up right away with his own climax.
Wow. That was better than his plan. He liked having her come first like that. Why hadn’t he thought to do it that way from the start?
“Jesus,” she whispered, her hands drifting down either side of his spine. “That’s what I’ve been waiting for.”
“For me to be even bossier than usual?”
She chuckled. “I don’t give a fuck if you’re being bossy. I was talking about how you did what you wanted to do. You unleashed, and it was fucking amazing!”
“That’s a lot of the word fuck in your sentences. Does that mean it was really, really good?” He swallowed, resting his head on her chest. She already said it was amazing, but he wanted to be thorough with his information he received from her, just in case she was simply being nice before.
“It means it was better than good—it blew my mind. Please do that to me every time. Biting included.” She drew lazy patterns on his lower back.
“’Kay. I can do that. If you promise to try and always be this wet and yummy and coming all over me. My inner thighs are drenched.” He smiled and made a happy, grinning, humming sound.
“I can do that, too. Sounds like you have a deal.”
When his breathing regulated, he propped up to the side and inspected her for wounds. “I didn’t mean to . . . I don’t know why I did it like that. It was mean.”
“Shut up,” she said, smiling, and her eyes dazed. “That was . . . God, I hope you do that over and over. And if you don’t—I’ll kick your ass.”
“But you’re a little person.” His eyebrows poked up on his forehead.
“I’ll get Zach to do it for me. He’s the defender of all kinky, rough sex.” She chuckled, smacking his chest with a weak slap.
“But now that I feel normal again, I realize it wasn’t loving. How could you like that?” His voice went up in pitch. “It was meaner than mean—it was bad.”
“It was not. It was you—basic, unhindered Adam, with power and beauty, and God . . . I really want a cigarette after that. Then my bones really would be a pile of Jell-O.” She cupped his jaw, then her hand slid down his neck with a lack of energy and her palm smacked down onto his sweaty chest. “You’re not capable of being mean to anyone, sweetie.”
He stared at her, mouth agape, speechless.
“Are you okay?” She searched his eyes. “Did you hurt yourself or see numbers?” She grinned.
“Mmm . . . Not that I can remember. I feel really . . . good right now, too.” His eyes went wide, and he breathed slow and easy. Was he supposed to feel this good after being a beast like that? “I feel like I’m not supposed to, but is it okay if I liked that a lot?”
“Yes, God, yes!” she shouted. She chuckled and leaned forward, kissing him. Her arm wrapped around his head, keeping him there.
“Okay—then I’ll . . . Well, I won’t plan to do it, but if I act like an animal again, and if you say it’s all right, then I won’t worry. Does that sound good?”
“More than good.” She slid one of her legs between his. Her skin was slick with what was probably his sweat, since he basically ran a marathon inside her body without stopping for air or water.
“I love you, and you’re so sexy I can barely breathe most of the time. It’s good to know you feel that way about me sometimes, too.” She sighed. “I definitely needed that.” She rubbed her foot along his leg.
It made the hairs tingle. “I do feel that way about you. A lot, actually, but I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Sweetie, you could never hurt me—ever. Not possible.” She sighed, and her hand ran down his side, then gripped his hip. “It’s not in you to do that. That’s one of the reasons I chose you. You keep me safe, and that’s all I could ever ask for—other than your huge cock.”
“Oh . . . I . . . Thanks?” What was he supposed to say?
“Welcome. Now, let’s go home. We need to break in your bed as a married couple.”
“I wish it was bigger,” he said.
“It’s big enough. And I like that it keeps us close together.”
It was his same full-sized bed from his bedroom at his dad’s house. They didn’t have the money to get a new bed because they had already spent money on other essential furniture. It wasn’t an option to ask his dad for help. He’d already paid for their expensive honeymoon.
A few kisses later and they rolled out of bed, then packed up.
He arranged the flight home, and the rest of the day in his mind he wished Sam and his mother well.
Thomas Matthews was a person he couldn’t deal with right now. His biological father would have to wait.
* * *
Being back home was good, and now that school had started, Adam’s rhythms and flows were better. He was less on edge—less demanding of Mari and Choppy.
It had been a good summer, but he was glad it was over.
Adam tapped his pencil on his desk. Online classes were fine, but he wished he had more classes with Mari. Not possible to have more than a few basics since they were going in different directions.
Today he’d be with her in English 101.
He put Choppy’s leash on. Returning to his math when he got back home would be fine. It wasn’t hard, but his mind kept wandering to Mari—naked and in his grip.
“Time to go,” he told his other best friend. Well, best friend after Zach and Victor, though Victor sometimes still made him tense in the neck and shoulders, and would have him smashing Mari’s hand up to his ribs so she stayed with him and away from the playful, boastful Vic.
Choppy hopped and wagged her tail. He petted her and smiled as they headed for the door.
“Mari’s waiting for us,” he told her.
He locked the door and could barely believe they’d only been in this place for a month and a half. Mari made sure all the boxes were emptied and everything was put away. She had it done within two days of them being home.
It felt like they’d always lived here, and like they’d always had friends.
When he arrived on campus, Mari was sitting outside the library waiting for him, but she was talking to a really big guy wearing a backward ballcap. Adam could only see the backside of the man, but he was huge!
Mari was laughing. Her hand swung out, and she smacked the guy playfully in the arm.
“Mari!” Adam called out and ran straight to her, pulling Choppy along.
His neck was ready to explode from the blood boiling in his heart and head, pumping between the two like a firehose moved it through.
It took a few seconds before the big guy moved over. She saw her husband and waved with a big smile.
His stride never slowed. He couldn’t reach her fast enough and let this guy see the ring on both their fingers.
“Have you heard from that controlling bitch?” Mari asked the man.
Adam almost bumped into the guy as he wound his way around him to get to her.
“Man, Adam, you act like I’m trying to steal your woman,” Zach’s familiar voice said.
“Hey,” Adam said, the pressure in his head lessening.
“Did I make you see numbers?” Zach clapped him on the shoulder. “Because you hauled ass like they were shooting equations out of your ass. Must’ve been painful.” He chuckled.
“No, they didn’t. I haven’t seen numbers since before our wedding. Mari keeps me calm,” Adam said, his shoulders squared.
Zach grinned wider. “Yeah, I’ll bet. Calm . . . That’s code for constantly getting laid.”
Mari smacked his brother in the arm again. “One of the perks of being married.” She smirked.
They promised they’d quit hassling Zach to ask Lorraine. He didn’t want to hear married talk anymore.
Lorraine was . . . picky. Very hard
to please, and half the time she drove him insane.
“And to answer your question—no, we have not heard from the demented Keebler Elf,” Mari answered. That was Mari’s other nickname for Sam.
“Oh, shame . . .” Zach’s wolfish grin earned another smack by Mari.
“What’s going on? You have to be here with news or else you wouldn’t be here,” Adam accused.
“Okay, fine. Mom and your dad Thomas—they’ve remarried. I’ve been told Samara went berserk and tried to stab herself in the neck with a fork. They won’t let her use any utensils anymore at all. Not even chopsticks.” Zach’s eyes dropped. “She’s a step away from being a full-fledged animal—eating with her hands and shit.” Adam’s face dropped, and so did his heart. Married? His parents? Why would they do that? Zach cleared his throat and continued on. “Sorry, man. I should’ve prepared you for this news, not just dropped it on you like that.”
Adam’s breath was stuck in his throat.
“How’s our dad taking it?” Mari asked about Dustin.
“He’s okay, I guess. I visited him last weekend. He’s been dating somebody—but he won’t say who. He seems sad about Mom, but kind of okay at the same time. It’s a little confusing, actually.” Zach shrugged.
“Well, as long as he’s happy.” Adam set down his backpack and picked up Choppy. He’d keep her close by today. He got a letter from Dr. Harkham for the school, stating he needed to have this dog as his constant companion while here. It was only supposed to be in the classes he had without Mari, but he was taking advantage and bringing Choppy to each class on campus now.
It really settled him down. One stroke of her fur and he was able to focus really well.
“Tell me again why you’re taking on a double major?” Zach asked, staring at the dog. “I mean, if it means you have to bring your pet with you to class—don’t you think that’s a signal you’re taking on too much?”
“Okay, Samara,” Mari mocked Zach, calling him by his sister’s name. “He can take care of himself. Don’t need to be overprotective.”
Zach’s palm flew up to shoulder height. “All right, all right . . . Sheesh! Why do I care? The last time he went into a classroom and freaked out, he found you. The next time he might find a celebrity that will write him into their living will, and he’ll inherit their billions after having hot sex with them.” He retreated back a few steps. “Hey, I gotta go. Lorraine is waiting for me. I promised her we’d go to lunch today. But you might want to call Mom. She wants to talk to you.” He waved and left.
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