Like I’d noticed a few times before, gone was the old, stupid, average Eric Plath, after all. Part of him was still there, though, with my good half probably acting as a check to the impulses of my tweaked half. Double the pleasure, double the fun—in a good-bad sort of way. That was all that mattered, and I told myself that again and again as I stared into the darkness.
Keep my head on straight. Never give completely in to the Dark Side.
* * * *
Althea looked like hell in the morning. I caught her leaning against her locker, her forehead resting against it, her eyes closed. I expected to hear her snoring, but her eyes fluttered open on my approach.
“Hey,” I said.
“Hey.” She yawned.
It was kind of weird, but despite my mental and physical fatigue, I was in pretty high spirits that morning. “I lost you yesterday,” I noted, leaning against another locker as I watched her struggle with hers. Not that she was trying very hard, anyway, seeing as how her eyes had slid shut, and she was just feeling around the dial for her combination. “Looks like you got away without a problem.”
“Yeah. I had to run to the nearest ATM to access a computer, but I overshot myself and pretty much broke the bank’s system. You saw me.”
I made a face. “Yeah, so did the rest of the world. You were exposing your identity. Bad move.”
“I know, I know, my bad. I got carried away and didn’t think. Anyway, I ran back home, which is kinda sad. It sucks that I can’t just surf the wires without being attached to some dumb computer. You know, just stand anywhere, focus my powers, and then BAM! I’m wired. I’m hoping I’d reach that point sometime soon, when I advance some more with my powers.”
“Hey, from what I saw on the news last night, you were able to delay the break-in.” I slugged her playfully on the arm. Althea teetered on her feet, but her eyes were still closed, and she was again leaning her forehead against her locker.
“Yeah, I guess. Not good enough, though. I wanted to manipulate the Antiquaries’ main security codes and trap all the dolls in one place, make it easier for Peter and Magnifiman to smash them to bits.” She yawned, pulling herself away and knuckling sleep from her eyes. “So, what about you? Where’d you go?”
I shrugged. “Got swept up by the crowd. It was a mess. I’m still surprised that I saw the whole thing even with the stampede and craziness that went on.”
“Oh. You saw the new guy then?”
Althea blinked several times and fixed me with a clear-eyed gaze, her head slightly tilted to the side. I tried, for a fraction of a second, to read her and to see if she knew something.
Unfortunately, a fraction of a second wasn’t enough—note to self: work on comprehension speed.
“I did, yeah. The news reports pretty much summed up the scene—or what he looked like.” I gave another shrug, pretending indifference. “Have you talked to Peter?”
The first bell rang, and Althea turned her attention back to her locker. She managed to keep her head clear for a little while and finally got her books out, and we walked to class together.
“Hell, I haven’t been talking to anyone else but Peter!” She chuckled. “After the attack, he contacted me from the police station and had me analyze all kinds of data he and Magnifiman uncovered.”
“All classified, I’m sure.”
“Duh?”
I rolled my eyes. “So you guys were at it all day then?”
“Pretty much, but we had breaks. Oh, the new girl was with him, too.”
“Miss Pyro?”
Althea stifled her laughter. “Her, yeah. God, I wonder how she took to her new alias. Anyway, she stayed with Peter the whole time. Pretty cool, huh? It’s almost like a superhero league that’s forming. All we need now are people with wind, electricity, water, and sound powers. Peter and I were too busy talking shop, though, so I wasn’t able to say much to her except ‘Hi’ and ‘Later.’”
I barely listened to her as I gnawed at my lower lip. “So, uh, do you know if Peter’s around today? He never called me last night, but I figured he was pretty busy.” Of course, I didn’t expect him to spend the entire day with Miss Pyro.
“He’s around, yeah. I saw him earlier today. He was in a hurry, and he was busy talking to someone on his cell phone.”
“Probably Magnifiman—or his mom.”
“Probably.” Althea paused and gave me a quick, searching look. “Hey, have you been working out lately?”
“Yep. Can you tell? Push-ups and some weight training every day, though I wish I had the right equipment for them.”
Althea grinned. “I’m impressed! You’re doing pretty good for someone who doesn’t have the right stuff.”
“Yeah, well—improvisation’s one of my talents.” I sure wasn’t lying to her then.
Peter was in his seat when we entered the classroom. The air crackled with excited chatter among the students, with “Miss Pyro” and “Shadow Puppet” being the morning’s buzz words. As I neared my seat, I saw that Peter was still on his cell, his back turned to me, one hand pressed against his other ear. I didn’t bother him and just took my spot, reluctantly forcing my attention to mundane crap like school. My manifesto was safely tucked inside one of my bag’s inner pockets, and I was itching to pull the disc out, ogle it, and brag to anyone who’d listen that, ayup, I’d just taken one step closer to full-fledged supervillainship. Of course, that also meant having the entire class and two incognito superheroes jump me when I wouldn’t be ready for them.
Peter eventually got off his phone, but only because the second bell rang. He put it away in his backpack and turned to me with a tired little smile. “Hi,” he said. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you yesterday.”
I waved him off despite a faint—but not that faint—wave of annoyance that swept over me when he spoke. “That’s cool. I expected you and Trent to be up to your ears with work.”
“Yeah. It was nuts.”
“So when did you get home?”
“I don’t know. Sometime around ten, I think.”
I stared at him. “No way. You guys were working all that time?”
He smiled sheepishly. “Pretty much. We took a couple of breaks to eat, of course. Trent went off for a power lunch type of thing with the mayor and Sgt. Bone, and I took Wade out. Then we went to dinner later on.”
“Wade? Who’s he?”
“She.” Peter glanced around and then leaned a little closer, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Miss Pyro. Her real name’s Wendy, but she hates it and prefers to be called Wade.”
I looked at him for a moment. “Oh, okay,” I eventually blurted out. “Hope you guys had a good, productive meal.”
“We did, actually. I was sick of talking shop after so many hours holed up after the attack, knocking our heads together to get some puzzles solved. So dinner was fun—probably the most fun I’ve had in a long time.”
I nodded. “Cool.”
“By the way…”
I raised a hand. “You won’t be able to see me or talk to me for a while because you’re busy.”
“Yeah. Sorry.” Peter laughed quietly. “Now that Wade’s working with us, the group’s moving forward pretty quickly in nabbing the Puppet.” He paused as I turned away to fumble around in my bag for my books and notes. “Wade’s pretty cool, Eric. You should meet her sometime.”
“I’m sure she’s a charmer.”
“She’s really sweet and cute—though a little insecure still, but I’m helping her get over that. And she’s really, really smart. Probably one of the smartest people I know. Once you start talking to her, you can’t stop.”
I nodded at his backpack. “I take it you were talking to her just now?”
“Oh, yeah,” Peter snickered, blushing. “I didn’t realize how much time had passed. I wasn’t even aware of walking to the room. I was totally lost in conversation with her.”
“Sounds like fun.”
His eyes sparkled, and he spoke in a light, hyperactive wh
isper. “She’s like me, Eric.”
“Uh—gay?”
He laughed, knuckling me playfully. I hated getting knuckled, and he knew it. “She’s just as torn about having powers as I am, you goof. It was amazing talking to someone who could actually empathize with me. Once we started complaining, everything just came out, and neither of us wanted to stop.”
“Sounds like you guys puked all over each other or something.”
“In a way, I guess. It was like all these pent-up feelings and shit about what we are and how we fit in and what we’re supposed to do, yadda, yadda—suddenly the dam burst. It was like free therapy for both of us.”
I cocked a brow at him. “Peter, you know you could tell me anything. I never kept you from confiding in me.”
“I know, I know, but this is different, though. Sure, I can tell you things, but I still can’t really, you know, tell you everything. Our experiences—who we are, what we are—” he faltered and fumbled with his words, flushing deeply as he struggled. I nodded, sighing.
Yeah, I wasn’t capable of empathy and all that shit because I wasn’t a fucking superhero.
“I know what you mean. It’s okay. You don’t have to say it.” I forced out a reassuring little smile, which seemed to work. Peter’s confusion and embarrassment gave way to an expression of relief. “I’m glad that she was able to hear you out.”
“I can’t tell you how relieved I felt afterward. I was tired but also energized, in a weird sort of way. I almost asked her out to a movie.”
I rubbed my temple. “Oh, I’ll bet you’re dying to kick that new guy’s butt for attacking her yesterday.” I glanced at him and smirked at the cloud that darkened his face. “Yeah, I was there yesterday and saw the whole thing. Didn’t Althea tell you we were hanging out when the attacks happened?”
“She did, yeah.” He looked angry, his jaw setting. “Everything happened so fast when he got Wade, the coward. I didn’t recognize him at all. He was just glowing all over, too, so it was like being blinded by light right before he hit me with his energy wave. Bastard. I can’t wait to find him.”
I stared at my notes, my pen held in one cold hand. The world was once again in red and yellow. “Better watch what you wish for,” I murmured, my words drowned out by that day’s lessons.
Chapter 15
School was worse than a drag that day, and I was convulsing in joy when it was finally over.
I hung out with Peter and Althea at lunch, and it was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. The conversation was mostly shop talk, from which I was completely excluded—naturally! The buzz centered on the formation of a superhero league when more good guys came into their powers.
So what were the requirements of this hypothetical elite club? Superpowers, of course, all used for the good. Intelligence, the smarter, the better, seeing as how the current known good guys were all rocket scientists in their own ways. Wade went to a private school outside Vintage, where she was an honor student. How she’d managed to keep Peter on the phone for such a long time while in school was a mystery to me, but I guess such was the nature of privilege.
I could barely take a bite of my homemade sandwich with all the synaptic energy that crackled around me through lunch.
There were a number of things about being on the wrong side of justice that I wasn’t so sure about since I’d undergone my transformation. Sorry—evolution. All the people I cared the most for were on the side of good, and while I enjoyed masquerading around and pretending to be my old, stupid, insignificant self, I now found myself faced with more pressing concerns about my allegiances, my private schemes of turning the Dark Side on its head, and my concession to a possible lifetime of ambivalent superhuman-ness.
That day, I desperately wished my good half didn’t exist, that it had been wiped out once the tweaked half had stepped out. The problem was that I continued to feel pain, and it sucked. I shouldn’t feel hurt at being pushed aside by my own friends. I shouldn’t feel regret at having to choose between my family and the Trill, even if it were only to move my scheme forward. Even if the feelings that overcame me since Peter talked to me that morning vacillated quite a bit, I was surprised I still had to experience pain just by listening to his fanboy jabber over Miss Pyro.
If I was supposed to be with the bad guys, shouldn’t I be numb to all these? Wasn’t that how supervillains became so good at what they did—because they simply didn’t care? Maybe that was an indication that I ought to break the Trill out ASAP, so he could fix me some more, and I could carry on without an unwanted emotional jolt every once in a while. My good half was a little too good, I guess, and it was hell not being able to suppress it when I needed it.
I let Althea and Peter enjoy their conversation and slipped off into silence for the entire lunch period while they chatted right through me. It wouldn’t have mattered, I guess. If they included me in their superhero talk, they’d be patronizing me in the worst way. If I got pissed enough and outed myself to them as the New Bad Kid on the Block, they’d literally kick my ass—unless I got to them first, of course, but I was in the early stages of my evolution and was still a little iffy about my powers and their use.
Sometime in the course of my Lunch of Torture, my gaze strayed to my hand and the friendship bracelet Peter had given me. It was still there—still intact, unscratched. Not a piece of computerized—or radioactive or whatever—fiber out of place.
“Hey, Peter, is this thing still working?” I asked, breaking up their privileged circle of two. I raised my arm and flashed him the bracelet.
“Uh, yeah, it should be,” he replied. He looked momentarily confused. “Though I’ll have to admit, I haven’t been checking up on you lately.”
“Too busy, I know.” I shrugged and pulled my hand away. “That’s cool. I was just wondering.”
“What’s up? Are you thinking of ripping it off or something, so you can join the other side?” He laughed.
I looked at him and then at Althea, who was laughing along. I smiled my fakest and shrugged, turning my attention back to my sandwich. “Sure. Why not? Life’s more interesting that way, don’t you think?”
That earned me another round of patronizing laughter. Maybe they didn’t think I was smart enough to be a bad guy, even. I’d expected as much. One of the biggest fears I’d had since finding out about Peter and Althea was my falling short of their standards, and look what was happening. I’d gotten used to holding back, though, and whatever ache I felt the whole time was eventually ignored. If anything, I was beginning to learn to accept it. I’d read somewhere there were people sometime in the past who swallowed small doses of poison day after day in order to make their bodies or systems immune to the stuff or to pain. I never bothered to check the accuracy of those claims, but thought they sounded morbidly romantic. I figured if the Trill failed to harden me against hurt, it would be best to absorb what came my way in order to reach that point in my development.
That’s very clever of you.
I smiled grimly against my sandwich. Maybe my powers made me smarter.
* * * *
“Althea, we’re going to need your help tonight,” Peter said after school when we were hanging out at Peter’s locker.
“After homework, of course.”
Peter laughed. “Well, duh! Wade and I will call you.”
“Oh, she’s coming over to your place?”
“Yeah, to meet my family and have dinner with us. Dad and Trent will be around. Mom and Dad can’t wait to meet her.”
“I’m surprised her parents let her go.”
“Well, Mom called them and asked them herself, apparently. Just this morning, too, when she was at work. Wade just left a message about it.” Peter raised his cell phone as though to prove it. “She thought she wouldn’t be able to, but I guess Mom put on the charm for her sake.” He chuckled.
I stared at him. I’d never seen him in such a bubbly mood that lasted all day. “That was quick. How long did it take for me to be invite
d to dinner with only half of the family?”
Peter rolled his eyes. “Jesus, Eric, don’t be petty.”
I sneered. “I was just kidding. I’m glad they’re taking to her very well.”
“I am, too.”
“The way you’re talking, Peter, I wouldn’t be surprised if you end the day being engaged to her.” Althea snorted. “I hope she knows you’re gay and really, totally taken.”
Peter was about to say something, but stopped and glanced at his watch. “Oh, shit. I gotta go. Wade’s showing up early, so she can help me work on my speed and agility.”
Tennis lessons, it looked like—those agility training moments that I used to be involved in.
Funny how love worked.
“And I promised to help her work on her aim. She’s still pretty rough around the edges. But, yeah, we’ll call you, Althea.”
Hopefully Wade wouldn’t burn the house down before the dinner bell was rung. I followed them to the parking lot, my pace slowing while theirs seemed to speed up, matching the hyper conversation that continued between them. Watching them from behind, I felt clarity bloom. The non-existent distance between them—in intelligence, abilities, connections—couldn’t be any more clearly demonstrated than in that one slice in time, when they walked side-by-side, totally wrapped up in their shared experiences and their shared language so that the rest of the world just didn’t exist. I pictured Wade forming a third figure, walking to one side of Peter, sandwiching him between two girls who were his equals in everything.
Eat it up.
I did. I welcomed it, absorbed it, let myself go in the bitter aftertaste. I stopped, and they kept going farther and farther, completely oblivious to the fact I wasn’t with them anymore.
Eat it up. Use it.
I turned around, hurrying away and taking a different route out. I never looked back, but I swore to myself if I suffered a momentary weakness and shed a tear over this, I’d allow myself that since it would be the last time. Where I was headed and where I belonged, there was no room for useless crap like grief, was there?
Good boy.
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