by Maggie Walsh
Raith raised an eyebrow then turned. “Okay, two waters coming right up. Can I get you fellas anything to eat?”
“No thank you,” Jesse and Taylor answered together.
Raith returned with two glasses of water and handed them to Jesse and Taylor. He then took a seat next to Jesse, flipped it around and straddled it.
“Okay, so, you wanted to talk, so talk,” Jesse said.
“All right, Jesse, I’m just gonna lay it out there for you. Yes, you are Micah’s mate. Micah is our Alpha, which means, you are our Alpha mate. That is a huge thing in our world. Everyone in this pack will do anything to keep you safe. We will give our lives to protect you.”
“Why? You don’t even know me.”
“It doesn’t matter. You are our Alpha’s mate, so you are very important to all of us,” Gabriel said.
“But I’m not staying. We’re leaving, I’m not going to be Micah’s mate.” Jesse huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.
Crew practically whined, “But you have to, you can’t just walk away. That would be devastating…”
“What Crew is trying to say is,” Raith cut him off, shooting Crew a look. “We spend our whole lives looking for our mate’s. The one person that fate has chosen to be ours, to be our perfect match. The one person fate made specifically for us. Literally the other half of our soul.”
“Why don’t I get a choice?” Jesse asked coldly.
“None of us do, fate decides,” Lexi added.
“Well, fate is wrong on this one.” Jesse took a drink from his water.
“Fate is never wrong. She made you for Micah and Micah for you. Two halves to a whole,” Lexi said.
“I’m not interested. I don’t want anything to do with another selfish, controlling asshole. Thanks, but no thanks.”
“That’s not Micah at all. Yes, he’s an Alpha, but he is the most understanding, caring, selfless man I know,” Raith argued.
“You could have fooled me,” Jesse said softly.
“May I ask something?” Gabriel asked gently and waited for Jesse to nod his approval. “What exactly happened? I mean, I saw the way you were looking at Micah before you went up to the office. You did go with him willingly. I didn’t sense you were scared, so what happened?”
“He was there,” Taylor said as he pointed at Raith. “He saw what happened, he heard what that twat said.”
Again, Lexi and Crew started to laugh. Gabriel looked horrified by Taylor’s choice of word and Raith looked confused and pissed.
“Yes, I was there, but I didn’t think Micah said or did anything to deserve being called a twat,” Raith said angrily.
“Not Micah, the other one, that total butt licker. Twat was his name again? Thomas?” Taylor said with a growl of his own.
“Oh damn, he said twat was his name, you get it?” Lexi laughed and slapped Crew on the back.
“Dude, we got it.” Gabriel huffed.
“Dude? Who says dude anymore? What are you stuck in the 80s, handsome, because they called and want their word back,” Taylor asked Gabriel.
“Enough!” Raith raised his voice, and everyone shut up and looked at him. “Now, Yes, I was there and yes I know Thomas can be…abrasive sometimes.”
“Abrasive?” Jesse cut him off. “He called us whores!”
“He what?” Gabriel growled.
“He didn’t call you whores…”
“Not in those exact words, but it was more than implied and you know it!” Taylor cut Raith off.
Raith sighed heavily. “Okay, yes, it was implied. But you have to understand something. Thomas and I are Micah’s Beta’s. It is our job to not only lead the enforcers, but to protect our Alpha.”
“And we look like threats to you?” Jesse motioned his hands between himself and Taylor, and then down his slim body.
“In a way, yes. Because you are our Alpha’s mate, you are probably the most danger to us, Jesse. If you suffer, he suffers. If anything happens to you, it would tear him apart. So in a way, yes, you are a threat. Like right now, you are about to destroy us,” Raith said gently.
“Destroy you? How? I don’t understand.”
Gabriel sighed and spoke gently, cautiously, “When you rejected Micah, he lost it. He shifted into his wolf and we can’t get him back. He’s broken. The pain of a mate’s rejection is like no other pain in the world. Except not being able to protect your mate and losing them through death.”
Jesse’s whole face fell, his eyes soften and started to glisten with unshed tears. He blinked rapidly to stop them from falling, He then crossed his arms over his chest as he straightened his back and clenched his jaw. “He should have thought of that before he defended Twatmas. If what you say is true, then he should’ve stood up for me. No matter what, no matter who.”
Lexi and Crew were biting their lips, trying to hold in the laughter from the name Jesse called Thomas. Raith shook his head at them as he ran his hands down his face. He sighed a heavy sigh and looked at Jesse.
“You’re right. You’re absolutely right, Jesse. He should have, but it’s not easy being Alpha. He has to try to stay neutral, listen to all side’s first. Not jump to conclusions, or make any definite decisions until all the facts are in. He has to be strong and make all the tough calls. I have known Micah since we were pups. He’s been my best friend my whole life, and I know him better than anyone. I know he was excited and nervous to have finally found his mate. He has never gotten into a serious relationship because he didn’t want there to be a mess if, or when, he found his mate. One of the reasons he left our birth pack was because they wanted to force him to mate an Alpha female who wasn’t his mate. They wouldn’t let him take his rightful place as Alpha, until he married who they picked for him. He refused, he would never bond himself to anyone unless it was his true mate. Then, there you are. He finally found you. Then he could have lost you when those lights came down. That scared the shit out of him that those lights came down and you could have died. He got to you in time, thank the gods, but you were in danger, that’s all he saw, that you were in danger and he could have lost you after only just finding you.”
Jesse was fidgeting nervously. “All you’re doing is proving my point, Raith. If I was that important to him as you say, than he should have defended me.”
“At that point we were still waiting for information about what happened. He didn’t know if someone was after you. All of that combined and he was just trying to keep himself and everyone else calm. His instinct is to wrap you in bubble wrap and lock you away in a padded room to keep you safe. As the Alpha mate, if any of our enemies were to get their hands on you, that would destroy Micah, which in turn would destroy the whole pack. We would be left open for someone to come and claim our territory. It would destroy everything. I honestly don’t think it even registered to him what Thomas was implying, I think he was just listening to the list of who could have been the target, and relief that it wasn’t you personally.”
All the fight went out of Jesse as he listened to Raith’s words. His shoulders slumped, he curled his hands in his lap and looked down at them as he tried to hold in the tears. “Did I jump too quick to defense, like always? Am I letting my past influence my judgment of Micah? Thomas is a fucktard though, I don’t trust that bastard for a second.”
“And you don’t have to,” Raith said. Jesse jumped. Shit, he hadn’t realized he said all of that out loud. He squeezed his eyes shut and blushed.
“But then Micah laughed at him, why is that?” Taylor questioned angrily.
Raith looked at Taylor. “I don’t know about that. If he did, I don’t know why. All I’m asking is that you please, just talk to him Jesse. Tell him how you feel, let him try to at least explain everything to you from his point of view, before you walk away and make a decision we all may regret. Especially you.”
They were all quiet. Everyone was looking at Jesse, holding their breath waiting for his decision. Jesse was staring out the window, looking out into the blackness.
In his head he was questioning what to do. Should I give Micah a chance? Could I? Can I trust this man, this beast, with my life? With my heart? I want to, God do I want to. I’m so tired of running, of facing everything alone, or with Taylor. I want a real life. I want a home. Somewhere safe, somewhere I could be loved. Maybe where someone would actually put me first. Someone I can lean on, who will take care of me, who will want me, for me. Is Micah that person? He is my mate, and Raith says that’s what mates do. Maybe I should just talk to him? Give him a chance to explain. But if you’re gonna do this Jesse, you have to do it all the way. No half-assing it. You have to be totally honest with him. You have to tell him everything and then let the chips fall where they may. If he doesn’t want you anymore than that’s his problem. You were gonna leave anyway, you still can. God I don’t know if I can do this. What if he doesn’t want me? What if he’s disgusted with me? No, don’t think like that. Just go and talk to him. Lay out all your cards, all your skeletons for him to see, then make the next decision.
After what felt like hours, but was actually more like ten minutes, Jesse sighed heavily. Without looking at anyone, he asked, “Where is he?”
Raith smiled, relief written all over his face. “He’s up in his room. I can take you to him.” Jesse nodded his head yes, then stood up.
“Wait, Jesse.” Taylor jumped up too and looked to Raith. “You said he was in his wolf form. Is Jesse safe?”
“Trust me, Jesse is the safest person on the planet with Micah,” Gabriel answered gently.
“Nothing personal, cutie, but I don’t trust anyone, except Jesse,” Taylor answered Gabriel.
“It’s unheard of for a shifter to hurt their mate. To hurt any mate. That’s how precious mates are to us. All mates,” Gabriel smiled at Taylor.
“Are you gonna be okay here without me, Tay?” Jesse asked.
“Hell yeah, I’ll be fine, you know me? Give me a room full of hot guys and I’m entertained for the night. Maybe we could play a little strip poker.” Taylor winked at Jesse. Gabriel growled at him again. “Or maybe we’ll pour a vat of honey down this one’s throat.” Taylor looked at Gabriel with annoyance. “Go, go, talk to your man, make nice with the big wolf. I’ll be fine.”
Jesse smiled at his friend, “Thanks, Tay. Okay, lead the way Raith.” Jesse motioned with his hand for Raith to go first.
Chapter 4
Raith led Jesse up the stairs and down the main hall to a door at the end. He stopped before he opened the door and turned to Jesse. “I just want you to know, I really appreciate your giving him this chance. He truly is a great guy, Jesse. Let him show you. You won’t regret it, I promise.”
Jesse gave Raith a small smile and nodded. He was too nervous and confused to answer right then. Raith turned and placed his hand on the knob, then paused. “Oh, I know he looks scary as hell, even to us, in his wolf form, but I promise you, he won’t hurt you. If you like, I can stay right out here, if it makes you feel safer.”
Jesse swallowed loudly. “Yes, could you?” Jesse asked nervously.
Raith nodded his head yes and then turned and opened the door. He stepped in and Jesse slowly followed. He looked around the room, it was very masculine in chocolate and blues. There was a very large four-post bed with a sheer curtain draping above the headboard. There were two sets of French doors, on either side of the bed. A living room was set up to one side. There were two doors, which Jesse guessed went to a closet and a bath. There was a fireplace, with two big windows on either side, with window seats in them.
Lying on one of the window seats, was the biggest damn wolf Jesse had ever seen. He was breathtaking. He was bigger than a horse. He had chestnut fur with lighter fur sprinkled throughout his body. His head was lying on his paws as he looked out the window. His nose twitched, his nostrils flared and he started to sniff the air. He slowly raised his head and turned to look in their direction.
Jesse’s eyes locked with the most deep blue eyes, and he knew it was definitely Micah. He saw pain in his eyes, and it broke Jesse’s heart. Micah let out a small whine and dropped his eyes, almost as if in shame. He lowered his head and turned away.
Raith stepped back to the door. “I’ll just leave you two alone.” He looked at Jesse and raised an eyebrow in question. Jesse nodded his approval. Raith left and softly closed the door behind him.
Jesse turned back to Micah and those beautiful eyes were staring at him again. It was like they were looking straight into him, seeing everything inside him. Jesse clasped his hands together in front of himself and dropped his eyes to the floor. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Jesse cleared his throat nervously. He started chewing on his bottom lip as he heard ruffling and then the tapping of claws on the wooden floor.
Jesse lifted his head and saw Micah slowly walking toward him. Micah got up close and started to circle around Jesse as he sniffed him. Then he circled again. Nervously, Jesse said, “You’re making me dizzy.” Micah stopped in front of him and sniffed Jesse’s hand. He stuck his nose in Jesse’s hand and flicked his head up. Jesse chuckled and smiled. Lifting his hand, he softly petted Micah’s head. Jesse ran his hand down along Micah’s back, then back up to his head. Micah nuzzled his snout into Jesse’s hand and whined. “You’re so soft,” Jesse whispered.
Micah pulled away and walked over to the couch. He jumped up on it and sat down on his hind legs. Jesse slowly approached the couch and sat on the opposite end as Micah.
They both sat very still, just looking at each other for a few minutes. Then Jesse asked, “It’s kind of hard for us to talk if you stay like that, don’t you think?”
Micah tilted his head to the side as he studied Jesse. He just stared at him. Jesse sighed and stood up. He turned away and walked toward the door. “Well, that worked just fucking peachy,” Jesse mumbled. He reached for the door knob. “Wait,” he heard softly spoken from behind him. Jesse froze but didn’t turn around. “I’m so sorry, Jesse,” Micah whispered. His voice sounded defeated.
Jesse lowered his hand and turned around. Micah was sitting on the couch in his human form, with a blanket wrapped around his waist. Oh holy hell! Jesse thought. His breath caught in his throat and his mouth started to salivate. His eyes raked over all the yumminess in front of him. Micah’s long chestnut hair hung loose down his back. Jesse wanted to grab it and run his fingers through it. His eyes moved to Micah’s wide shoulders, they were all tanned, smooth, and strong. Muscled, strong arms that Jesse remembered felt incredible wrapped around him. The massive broad chest, muscles on muscles, Oh Damn, he has a perfectly sculpted eight pack, Jesse thought as his eyes kept exploring the buffet in front of him. There was a tribal tattoo wrapped around his right bicep, it wrapped over his shoulder and across onto his right pec and down his side.
All that smooth golden skin looks so lickable, Jesse thought as he absently licked his lips. Jesse felt his cock swell and press painfully against his zipper. His eyes traveled back up that glorious chest to a strong neck and jaw. Pink full lips just begging to be kissed and nibbled. Then those two incredible eyes that Jesse just wanted to drown in.
Micah sat still, just watching Jesse devour his body with his eyes. It almost felt like a soft caress. Micah’s heart started to beat faster, his breath became shallow and his cock filled instantly when Jesse’s cute, pink tongue snaked out to lick his lips. Gods, how I would love to feel that tongue run all over my body. Feel those soft lips wrap around my cock. He groaned as the smell of Jesse’s arousal hit him. It thrilled him that his mate was enjoying looking at his body, and that it turned him on. Then their eyes locked and Micah’s breath caught at the sight of pure lust in Jesse’s eyes.
Micah cleared his throat to try to calm his breathing before he spoke. This shook Jesse out of his trance and he lowered his eyes. “Can we talk, Jesse? Just talk,” Micah almost pleaded.
Jesse slowly walked back to the couch and sat back down. He placed his hands in his lap to try to hide his bulge. He swallowed hard, then lifted his head to m
eet Micah’s eyes.
Micah gave a small nervous smile, but his eyes were sad. “I am so, so sorry, Jesse. I never meant to give you the impression that what Thomas said was what I thought of you. Or that I agreed with what he said, because I don’t. I think you’re incredible, Jesse.”
“I’m sorry I got all defensive so fast and bolted. I should have calmed down and listened to the rest of the conversation,” Jesse said quietly, as he looked down at his hands.
Mica moved a hair closer. “No, you have nothing to be sorry about. You didn’t do anything wrong, Jesse. It was all my fault. I should have reprimanded Thomas right away. I honestly, at the time didn’t realize what he said or what he was insinuating about you and Taylor. Toward you personally. You’re my mate and I should have. I should have protected you, stood up for you. I am so sorry that I didn’t. My actions were totally inexcusable. I am deeply ashamed of my behavior. I only hope that someday you can forgive me.”
Jesse could see the deep pain in Micah’s eyes. He could see and hear that everything Micah was saying was the truth. “I understand now. I didn’t at the time. But Raith and Gabriel explained it to me. All the pressure you were under, the emotional rollercoaster you were going through at the time. That maybe you weren’t thinking clearly. I guess I wasn’t either. I was just almost smashed like a bug.” Jesse released a nervous laugh. Micah cringed at the memory. Jesse continued, “Then I find out that shifters were real, and I’m a mate. Hell, your mate. And you’re an Alpha. Then, not for nothing, but then I’m being surrounded by three of the biggest men I have ever seen, who I don’t know, in some secret office, talking about someone maybe trying to hurt me. My nerves were totally fried to begin with. Then your friend starts insulting me and Taylor, and I just lost it, especially when you seemed to agree with him.” Jesse looked back down at his hands. Wow, where did all that come from, and why did I just confess all of that to him? Jesse thought to himself.