“You later,” David whispered.
Shuddering at the memory, Isaac went to the side table and poured himself a cup of water. It was refreshingly cool, and he closed his eyes. He needed to get control of himself. He was like a dog in heat. When he glanced up, David was still intent on his work. Which is as it should be! Isaac picked up his saw again. He was being stupid.
Yet being near David and keeping their distance made him ache. One of the things he’d grown to crave was the easy affection David showed him, and that he was able to show back. He couldn’t remember ever seeing his parents so much as brush their shoulders together or touch hands. Forget kissing or hugging.
He’d wondered from time to time if it was different when his parents and other married adults were alone. Because being in the same room with David and not being able to run his palm over David’s back, or press a kiss to his neck, or feel the warmth of his breath, made Isaac ache. But David seemed glued to his work. Which is as it should be.
After a few minutes, David went to the barn door and disappeared outside. Isaac sawed through another beam with even more force. Then David was back, grinning.
“They’re gone.”
Grasping for him, David backed Isaac away from the sawhorse, kissing him frantically. “Finally alone,” he muttered between kisses, his tongue surging into Isaac’s mouth. “I need you.” His hands roamed.
Sighing at David’s touch, Isaac had to laugh at his foolish misgivings. “I thought maybe you were tired of me already.”
Brow furrowed, David leaned back and held Isaac’s face in his hands. “Not even a little bit, Eechel. I want you so much. I think about it day and night. It’s torture having you near, but not near enough.”
Moaning, Isaac yanked David closer, tugging at his shirt. He traced his fingers over David’s lips. “I want to kiss you all the time.”
“Me too.” David licked into Isaac’s mouth. “Kissing has never been like this.”
Going stiff, Isaac jerked away. “Who else have you kissed?”
David chuckled. “Jealous? Only two girls. Naomi Miller once, and Fannie a few times. It never felt like this. Like kissing you.”
“And you haven’t…not with any other boys?” For some reason, Isaac hoped the answer was no.
David shook his head. “I never dared. I never thought…” He pressed their foreheads together, his breath warm. “Never thought I’d meet someone like me. Not just like me, but…you’re so much more than I ever dreamed. I want to kiss you forever.”
Before he could stop himself, Isaac whispered in David’s ear, his hand tight on David’s hip. “I want to taste your cock again. And more.”
His pale eyes darkening, David’s nostrils flared. “Oh Isaac. You have no idea the things I want to do to you.”
Isaac captured David’s hand. One by one, he sucked David’s fingers and kissed the callused pads. “I love your hands. I love the things you can do with them. To wood. To me.”
David surged closer, pressing Isaac back against the edge of the table. He cupped Isaac’s cheek. “Do you want…we could…” He swallowed thickly.
Isaac pressed a kiss to David’s rough palm. The verboten English word felt dangerous on his tongue. “Fuck me.”
They kissed deeply, hands roaming everywhere. Their galluses were stubborn, and Isaac was sure he would actually ignite into flames before they could get their clothes off, and he could feel David completely naked against him.
He licked the sweat from David’s neck, salt and sawdust mingling together. “I need to feel you.”
Panting, David stepped back. “Yes. I…” He shoved hair off his forehead. “Stay there. Let me just…”
Almost running, David closed the barn door and slid across the long beam. Then he rooted around near the horse stalls and returned to the table with a dark blanket and a small tin. He spread the blanket over the table while Isaac watched, his body vibrating as his mind whirled with hope and fear. David stood before him again, and the table edge jutted against Isaac’s lower back.
“This is sodomy,” Isaac blurted.
Lips parted, David nodded.
“Will it make us unforgivable?”
David ran his hands up Isaac’s sides, his breathing slowing. He made sure Isaac met his gaze. “We don’t have to do anything else if you don’t want to.”
Isaac took a deep breath. “But I do. I want it so much.”
“So do I.” David kissed him softly. “Touching you feels right. It feels…beautiful. It makes me so happy, Isaac. If it’s a sin, then I’ll gladly call myself a sinner.”
Isaac stroked David’s back, his eyes closed. “Sinners both,” he whispered. He kissed David slowly, their tongues coming together.
With infinite care, David undid Isaac’s galluses, and the hooks and eyes fastening the top of his dark shirt. He pressed his lips to the hollow of Isaac’s throat, and then urged Isaac to lift his arms. With his shirt tossed aside, a shiver danced over his bare skin as David stared with wonder, tracing his fingers over the sandy hair sprinkled on Isaac’s chest.
“Up.” He pulled on Isaac’s hips.
Isaac boosted himself onto the table and spread his legs as David stepped between them. David circled one nipple with his tongue, and then the other. Gasping, Isaac was eager to touch David, but David caught hold of his wrists, holding them down.
Bit by bit, as though he was discovering something wonderful, David explored Isaac’s body. He kissed the moles that dotted Isaac’s shoulders, dragging his tongue between them. He caressed the hair on Isaac’s arms, and ran his fingertips up and down Isaac’s spine while his eyes drank him in. He sucked on Isaac’s nipples until Isaac was sure he would spend in his pants, his hard cock pressing against his fly.
Never had Isaac felt more worthy. He knew it was proud and vain, but David made him feel like such a thing of beauty. It was as though David could see straight to his heart—to the very soul of him. He ran his hands over David’s head, holding him close where David kissed Isaac’s belly, his faint stubble scratching the pale skin there.
“Please, David.”
Nodding, David went to work on the buttons pinning the flap over Isaac’s bulging fly. Isaac lifted his hips so David could peel down his pants, and he watched David’s dark head at his feet. When his boots and socks were gone, and Isaac was utterly naked, he had to squeeze the base of his shaft and breathe deeply. There was something about David still being fully dressed, wearing his plain clothes and looking so Amish that made Isaac throb.
But he needed to see David’s body, and he tugged at his clothes, trying to help and likely hindering until David stood naked between Isaac’s thighs, their cocks bumping together. “Aren’t your feet cold?” Isaac blurted.
He smiled. “Indian Summer.”
Isaac drew him closer, wrapping his legs around David’s hips and touching him everywhere he could reach. David was a bit broader than Isaac, and Isaac loved the strong, sinewy feeling of his lean muscles. Loved that he could actually touch David like this. The reminder that he shouldn’t touch David or anyone like this returned, and he pushed it aside.
“It feels so good.” Isaac teased the hair on David’s chest and dragged his hands over his round backside as David bucked his hips against him.
“I want to be inside you,” David muttered.
Moaning, Isaac jerked his head in a nod. “Please. I don’t know how. Do we…should I turn over?”
David pressed their lips together. “I shall take great pleasure in bending you over the worktable in the future, but today I want to see your face.”
“But…how?” Isaac’s mind was blank. Everything he knew about sex he’d learned from watching the farm animals or from the glimpses of that tattered magazine with his friends years ago. Those pictures had featured women and men, and he didn’t know how it worked with only men.
“I have a confession.” David smiled wickedly. “One night after the drive-in, I stopped at a gas station and bought a magazine. I
t showed all kinds of things.” He pressed gently on Isaac’s shoulders and eased him onto his back, pulling his hips to the edge of the table. He caressed Isaac’s cheeks. “Your ass is so beautiful.”
Another verboten word, and it only made Isaac’s blood hotter. He looked at the rafters and the edge of the hayloft above, seeing the barn from a new angle. Then David leaned over him, filling Isaac’s vision and kissing him.
“Like this?” Isaac asked.
“That’s it.” David lifted Isaac’s legs and pressed a kiss to each knee before he parted them wide.
Splayed and utterly wanton, Isaac’s cock leaked, flushed against his belly. He should have felt ashamed or at least embarrassed, but he didn’t. He felt powerful. Wanted. Alive.
“This should help.” David opened the tin of saddle grease and dipped his fingers inside.
Isaac’s breath came fast as he watched David press a slick fingertip to his hole. “I don’t know if it’ll fit.”
Leaning over on his other hand, David kissed him gently. “It’ll fit. I promise. I’ll go slow.”
He kissed Isaac lightly as he teased with his finger, prodding and retreating with just the tip until he was stretching Isaac open with a whole finger inside. Isaac grunted, not sure if it was pleasure or pain radiating out. He wouldn’t have thought it was possible, but as he relaxed the muscles inside, bit by bit he took another finger.
“Look at you opening up for me. You’re amazing, Isaac.“ David licked his lips. “You’re so good.”
Isaac squeezed around David’s fingers, bearing down and taking him deeper.
David groaned. “You’ll be the death of me, Isaac Byler.”
Inch by inch, David stretched him patiently until Isaac thought he would explode. “Enough. You now.” Isaac lifted his hips. “Please.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.” David moved his fingers inside Isaac.
“I don’t care if you do. You won’t—please, David.”
With care, David removed his fingers and slathered more grease over his rigid cock. He dragged Isaac’s hips past the side of the table and leaned over him, spreading his legs even wider. Isaac’s knees bent toward his own shoulders, and he concentrated on breathing. This is actually happening. Kaffi and another horse snorted and stamped in their stalls, and Isaac imagined it was the pounding of his heart.
“That’s it,” David murmured, pressing the head of his cock against Isaac’s hole and gripping his hips. “Good. So good, my Isaac.”
The fire threatening to consume him converged on his ass, the burning bringing tears to Isaac’s eyes as David pushed inside. David’s thick cock felt impossibly huge, and Isaac cried out. It was too much—he couldn’t do it.
“Isaac?” David froze, his muscles trembling, fingers digging into Isaac’s hips.
He gulped, willing his body to relax. “Don’t stop. Just do it.” Isaac was suddenly frantic, the need to have David filling him was like the need for air deep in the lake with the surface far above. “Do it.” He grabbed at David’s waist.
With a thrust of his hips, David surged in deeper. Sweat dampened his hair as he froze again. “Okay?”
The burning was too much. Isaac couldn’t stretch any further—he was going to break. His cock softened, and panic flapped in his chest. He closed his eyes, forcing his lungs to expand. He wasn’t going to stop now—he wanted more, searching for the place where the need in him would be filled. He’d come this far, and he wanted all of it.
Panting, Isaac pulled his knees up higher. “Fuck me, David. Harder. All the way.”
Grunting, his eyes impossibly dark, David fucked him.
He pushed in, going all the way now, reaching deep inside Isaac. It hurt so much, but Isaac took every thrust with joy. David was inside him. He hadn’t known he could feel like this. Like he’d been born for it. Like he finally understood what living was.
Their skin was slick, slapping together as they jerked and muttered, reaching, reaching, reaching. There was no turning back, and the burn faded as Isaac let go. David rubbed against something inside him that made Isaac’s thighs quake as he cried out.
“That’s it, Isaac.” David leaned over and kissed him, their teeth clashing. He hit the spot again. And again.
And again.
Isaac became aware that the cries echoing through the barn were his own, and he watched a stray bird flap around the beams of the ceiling. He was bent almost in half, his body buzzing as if it flowed with electricity. He rocked with David’s thrusts, and his cock leaked. He reached for it in a daze.
But David knocked his hand away. His hips didn’t falter as he stroked Isaac’s shaft. Isaac stared into his eyes until David hit that secret place deep inside him, and Isaac tipped his head back, mouth open as he spurted. A long strand hit the bottom of his chin, and the pleasure crashed over him again and again until he could only shake and jerk with fading pulses.
David was still huge and hard within him, and Isaac squeezed around him. He opened his eyes. “Don’t stop.”
To think that David was so excited by him—that David was inside him—still seemed like a dream. He watched as David thrust unsteadily, trembling and panting now. He was so close to the edge, his face and chest flushed, sweat gleaming on his skin.
“Fill me up,” Isaac whispered.
With a gasp, David closed his eyes, jerking as he came. Isaac could feel it hot and wet deep inside him, and he reached out, caressing David’s hair and shoulders as David shuddered through his release. David bent over him, his hands gentle under Isaac’s ass as he caressed him. He pressed his face to Isaac’s neck, still inside him.
“My Isaac,” he murmured, pressing kisses to Isaac’s damp skin. “You were better than I could have imagined.” He licked a stripe under Isaac’s chin, cleaning him.
“Your cock feels much bigger than it looks.” Isaac was in a daze, and he felt that if David wasn’t holding him down, he would float up into the rafters.
David’s laughter tickled Isaac’s throat. “I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not.”
“It is, my David. I’ve never felt so good. Thank you.”
David’s smile faded as he straightened up, and gently removed himself from Isaac’s ass. He frowned. “Are you sure I didn’t hurt you?” He ghosted his fingers over Isaac’s slick hole.
“I imagine I’ll wish we had cushions on our chairs tonight. But don’t look like that. It was what I wanted. You’re what I want.”
Eyes still on Isaac’s hole, David asked, “Can you feel it inside you?” He lifted his fingers, sticky with his own seed where it dripped from Isaac’s ass.
“Yes, I can feel it. Can still feel you.”
“I want you to come inside me next time.” David raised his head, his eyes bright as he climbed onto the table.
They shifted and shimmied until they were both laid flat out, and David rolled on top of Isaac and kissed him with a quiet desperation. “I want you to fuck me, and then we’ll both be so deep inside each other, no one will ever be able to tear us apart.”
“Yes, my David.” Isaac whispered.
Yes, yes, yes.
“Did you hurt yourself, Isaac?”
He glanced up from his porridge to find Mother watching him closely. “No, I’m fine.”
“You winced when you sat down,” Katie added.
Now with all the eyes of his family on him, Isaac tried to act normal and laugh it off. His foot jiggled. “It’s nothing. I just fell on my rear end. But it was my fault. I dropped some nails and slipped on them, which was stupid.”
He was close to rambling, so he scooped up another spoonful of porridge. Cinnamon and brown sugar filled his mouth, and he chewed slowly. His explanation seemed to satisfy everyone, and Nathan chattered about school.
The tenderness was a potent reminder of what he and David had shared the day before. It was as though he could still feel David deep within him, and his body hummed at the thought. He couldn’t wait until they could sneak off to do it again
. To do everything.
They’d kissed and touched, entwined on the worktable until their cocks were hard once more. David had rolled over onto his stomach for him, offering himself up so prettily, holding his cheeks open so Isaac could get inside. He thought he would release just at the sight, let alone the sweet heat as he inched inside and covered David’s body with his own.
It had felt like nothing else Isaac had experienced. It was similar to the wet suction of David’s mouth, but the knowledge that he was inside the core of David’s body had made it even more special. The feel of David’s hole grasping around him had sent shivers from Isaac’s balls to the top of his head.
When he imagined now how they must have looked—sprawled out on the table, locked together and naked, sweating and grunting like animals—Isaac had to shift uncomfortably on the wooden bench. A voice inside reminded him how gravely he’d sinned, but Isaac couldn’t seem to care. If he was going to hell, it would be worth it.
“Isaac?”
He blinked. “Hmm?” All eyes were on him again. “Sorry, my mind’s somewhere else today.”
“We were just wondering how you’re getting on with Mary. You see her every day now.” Father’s tone was deceptively mild.
“Mary? Uh, fine. She’s a very nice girl.” Isaac felt his cheeks burn.
“Ohhh, he likes her,” Joseph teased.
If you only knew. “I like her fine. That’s all.”
“You should drive her home from the singing on Sunday night.” Mother smiled. “I’m sure you’d both like that.”
Isaac shrugged. “Maybe.”
Mother sighed. “Honestly, I don’t know what you’re waiting for! Some other boy will snatch her up if you’re not careful. Don’t make her wait too long. We all know she has her heart set on you.”
Isaac put down his spoon, the porridge suddenly tasting like paste. “I don’t think that’s true.”
A Forbidden Rumspringa Page 11