by Alison Tyler
She thought, too, about Dodger warning her in the past not to start feeling invincible. That was exactly what had happened to her, despite her promise that it never would. Well, after today's experience she would never believe she was invincible again.
Other thoughts came into sharp focus as she was pinned to that seat. Thoughts of Luke. Thoughts about how very much she loved him. She didn't want the fantasy to end. It had become too vital, too real. And not just for her, she realized now. Luke had risked his life for her. He could have stood on the sidelines, but he didn't.
Dodger parked in front of a small roadside taverna. He led her to a patio table that was shaded by a large umbrella. When the waiter came over, he ordered ouzo and water for them both.
"Peter isn't going to be too happy about having to use a second car." Cat stared down at the table as she spoke. "I'm sorry, Dodger. It was so dumb. I don't know what got into me. When you told me I couldn't do the stunt my way… I don't know, something snapped inside of me. Luke is probably right. I seem hell-bent to prove I can do any stunt that I dream up."
"You've got to stop dreaming so much, little girl. Maybe you've got to start thinking some more about what you're really after."
Cat's blue eyes were tinged with confusion and sadness. "I don't know anymore. I was scared today, Dodger. I keep thinking, though, that if I give in to that fear it will control me. When something like this happens, you either get right back up on that horse—or back in the car in this case—or you'll never ride again. Isn't that true, Dodger?"
He had to admit it was true. And he couldn't honestly advise Cat to quit in this way, spending her life with the knowledge that she had fled in terror.
"Do you remember your mother very much, Cat?"
She looked over at Dodger in surprise. "Mom? Not very well. Hardly at all, really. I do remember how sad my fourth birthday was without her."
"Luke's feelings about you being in the business remind me a lot of hers. She hated this business— right from the start."
"But she married you, Dodger. She had to know what she was getting into."
He patted his daughter's hand. "I was quite persuasive in those days. I met your mother while I was stunting for a B picture in Chicago. Can't even remember which one. It doesn't matter. I was restless one evening and went out with a couple of friends to a small club in town. I was sitting, drinking my beer, and minding my business when I heard a lady arguing with this fellow. Seems the man had too much to drink and was getting way out of line with his date. To make a long story short, I knocked the guy out and took your mother home that night. Saw her every night after that for the three weeks I was in town."
"I never did know how the two of you met. You never used to want to speak about her before."
Dodger looked steadily at Cat. "It was wrong of me, Cat. I should have told you a lot of things. First I was too bitter, then too guilty. When your mom walked out on me and took you with her back to Chicago, I was fit to be tied. Just like you just said… she married me knowing what I did for a living."
His voice was soft as he went on. "It was really a crazy business in those days. All the technical sophistication we use today barely existed then. A lot of people didn't know what the hell they were doing. Half the time, I probably didn't… although I wouldn't have admitted anything of the sort back then. I sure never admitted it to your mother, any more than I told her about all the guys being shipped off to hospitals or morgues. But she knew, anyway. She saw the whole picture early on, and she didn't like what she saw one bit."
"She asked you to quit?"
"A hundred times. She even walked out on me before you were born. The thing of it was, we were crazy about each other. She came back a week later. But nothing was any different. Then you came along, and she was more adamant than ever. It came down to a final ultimatum."
"This is beginning to sound familiar," Cat said with a wry smile.
"Yep. And I handled it just the way you did. I wasn't going to be blackmailed, either."
"Are you telling me now you were wrong?" she asked, doubting she could be convinced.
"We were both wrong… and we were both right. What it boiled down to was that we both suffered. It just about broke my heart when she walked out that last time, you in tow. I was losing both of you. Then, on top of all the pain, your mom got sick…" Dodger swallowed hard, shaking his head. "I sure did want you back, little girl… but not that way. Thank God she didn't suffer much. The cancer took over her body so fast, no one had time to prepare for her leaving us. Her father told me she passed away quietly in her sleep less than a week after they found out what was wrong with her."
Cat squeezed Dodger's hand. She had only the faintest memory of her mother, mostly honed from the few photographs she had of her. Cat vaguely remembered the funeral, everyone crying, her father holding her in his arms. She didn't know until long afterward how Dodger had fought her grandparents for custody of her. Dodger might not have won if it wasn't for her grandpa's bad heart condition. "Would you have done things differently, if you had a chance to do them over?" she asked quietly.
"I thought about that question myself, many times. I don't know if it would have really changed anything, but yes… I would have done things differently."
"You would have quit?"
"Cat, when I was your age, I saw everything in such black-and-white terms. Like I think you see things now. Maybe it's only with age that you come to realize that life has a lot of gray in it. Those few years with your mom I fought for things to be one way… my way. What that did, I realize now, was back her into a corner. I pushed with all my strength in one direction, and she pushed with all her power in the opposite direction. We ended up in a stalemate. And that's where we were both wrong."
Dodger smiled. "There's a word I added to my vocabulary too late to work things out with your mother. The word is compromise, Cat. I intend to put that word to use every chance I get with Joanie."
"Even if I was able to compromise, Dodger, I'm not sure Luke could. I don't think he believes in compromise in this situation. As he sees it, all stunts are death-defying feats. He's as adamant about this being a black-and-white issue as Mom was with you. You heard him yourself."
"I heard a man who just went through a mighty rough experience. He saw your car roll over. He almost witnessed the woman he loves get blown to smithereens. At this moment he probably can't see much beyond that."
"I guess you're right. But I'm not very confident he'll ever be able to see the color 'gray' on this one."
"Give him a chance to settle down a bit and go find out."
Cat smiled hesitantly. "I think I'm more frightened to do that than to get back in another Porsche and replay the crash scene."
"Yeah… but accomplishing the first may be worth a lot more to you than smashing up some car in a perfectly executed stunt."
"You've got a point there, Dodger. But I can't seem to stop calculating the odds. What would I say to him? I don't want to lose him. I love him. I'll never find anyone like him ever again."
She sighed, staring down at her untouched glass of ouzo. "Sometimes I wish he'd never seen me perched on the ledge that day. I feel like I'm on a giant roller coaster—up one minute, and the next, I'm hurtling downward, barely holding on. I'm sure it feels the same way to Luke."
"Joanie and I took one of those rough rides, too," Dodger said.
"But somehow you were able to get off."
"No, honey, we haven't gotten off the ride. You can't really stop going up and down like that and still be really alive. I mean alive now… not just living. This here is one item love and stunting have in common. There's no such thing as a smooth, easy road. There are bumps all along the way. You can only bypass some of them, and others you take real nice and slow. That's what Joanie and I are trying to do now. I'd bet all I've got that you and Luke can do the same."
"Go tell Luke that."
"I will, but I think you ought to tell him that yourself."
"I think you're right," she said with her first real smile of the afternoon. "But I'll give him a couple of days to cool off first."
Dodger lifted his glass and tapped it against Cat's. "Let's drink to that."
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Dodger stepped quietly into the hospital room.
"I'm not asleep," Cat said, sitting up in bed. "Turn on the light, will you?"
Dodger flicked on the switch near the wall. He smiled across at his daughter.
"How are you feeling?" he asked, coming up to her side. He was carrying a large bouquet of roses.
"Where did you find those?" She smiled. "Peter searched all over Alonnisos the other day for them."
"Athens has more to offer than the islands."
"I wouldn't know," she said, the first note of sullenness in her voice. Dodger stuck the roses in a pitcher of drinking water and then sat down on the edge of her bed.
"You sound as grouchy as Ben did back at that hospital in San Francisco."
"Did the doctor say anything to you?" she asked anxiously. She'd been cooped up in this room for two days. She might be sounding as grouchy as Ben, but she could also empathize with him now.
"What's your hurry, little girl? The film's over. You've got some time off."
"I wasn't planning on spending my vacation in the hospital. After fifteen years I do something dumb like this. I wouldn't mind if it had been because of a stunt," she muttered, swinging herself sideways so that she could get out of bed. "Could you hand me my crutches?"
"I thought the doctor wanted you to stay off your leg for a few more days before you started dancing around on those sticks."
"He gave me permission to visit my luxurious private bath while I'm holidaying here." She stepped down on her good right foot and carefully maneuvered her leg, done up in a cast from ankle to thigh, off the bed. Dodger gave her the wooden crutches and she hobbled off to the bathroom.
"Your head must be feeling better," he called after her. "You're back to being ornery."
"Wait till tomorrow. You ain't seen nothing yet."
Joanie came into the room, loaded down with magazines, as Cat was making her way back from the bathroom to her bed.
"How are you?" Joanie asked pleasantly.
Dodger answered for her. "Don't ask."
Cat smirked. "I'm much better, thanks. You didn't have to bring me all those magazines. I'll be out of here before I get to read them."
"Cat, the doctor says he'd like to keep you here a few more days," Dodger said sympathetically. "That break was pretty bad, and he wants to get some more X rays. There's a chance—a small chance now—that he might have to operate to reset the bone."
"Operate? I don't want an operation. I want to get out of here. You're all flying home tomorrow, and I intend to be on that plane. Come on, Dodger, talk to the doctor."
Joanie squeezed Cat's shoulder. "Relax. The doctor is only doing what's best. Besides, Dodger and I are going to stay around and fly back with you when you're ready to go home."
"I don't want you to have to do that."
"Why don't you get some shut-eye, Cat?" Dodger put his arm around Joanie. "I'll take Joanie to lunch, and then we'll talk some more about it in the afternoon. Meanwhile, don't worry about anything."
"Sure. Why worry?" Cat grumbled.
Dodger grinned. "You never did take to hospitals. Remember when you were seven and had to have your tonsils removed? Your screaming sure gave those tonsils a good last workout before the doc finally corralled you."
"Well, I just might start screaming again."
"Give us a chance to make our getaway first." He chuckled. "Oh… uh… by the way, you want me to get in touch with anyone?"
"No, I do not want you to call Luke, Dodger. We went over that yesterday."
"You thought differently a few days before this happened to you," he said, nodding in the direction of her leg. "After you almost blew yourself up, you said—"
"I know what I said. I changed my mind. I decided I don't want to compromise, after all. And, I don't want you to call Luke and tell him I'm in the hospital. That's final."
"Women!" Dodger threw up his hands. "I'll never understand them."
Joanie grinned. "Come on, Dodger. Let's go eat, and I'll try to enlighten you a little."
After they left, Cat picked up one of the fashion magazines Joanie had brought and began thumbing through it. She stopped a few minutes later when she realized she could not remember a thing she'd looked at.
Joanie and Dodger sat downstairs in the hospital cafeteria eating lunch. Dodger jabbed at his food for a minute and then threw his fork down.
"I don't know what to do, Joanie. That girl is pining away up there, but she's as stubborn as they come. I know what's going on, too. It's that pride of hers. She's damned if she's going to go begging."
"That's probably part of it," Joanie said, "but I think she's really scared."
"The man is in love with her, Joan. If she'll only let go of that two-fisted need to have everything her own way…"
"There's more to it than that. It's not only her profession at issue, it's Luke's."
"He's got a great profession. Stable, secure, highly respected."
"Exactly. The very opposite of Cat's world," Joanie reminded him.
"Okay. I grant you that. But Cat is a bright, sophisticated woman who could fit into Luke's world in the blink of an eye. I bet she'd knock that stuffy community on their butts. And it would probably do them some good. Luke sure as hell got knocked on his, and he admits himself he's not the same man anymore." Dodger was stretching his point a bit, but he really did think Luke was all the better for his involvement with Cat.
"If she gave up stunting completely she would end up being the one who was doing all the compromising. I thought you had a long talk with her about the importance of mutual give and take."
"I did," Dodger admitted. "I realize, too, that she's not ready to give up stunting completely. I think that's the main reason she doesn't want me to get in touch with Luke. When we had our little heart to heart about compromise, Cat was plenty upset about her close call with death, and at that point stunting had lost a lot of its appeal."
"Funny how things work out sometimes." Joanie smiled.
"Yeah." He grinned back. "I wonder how Cat would handle things if Luke did manage to find out about her accident and showed up uninvited?"
"Something tells me you're about to switch from stunt coordinator to director," Joanie said, giving him a sly look.
Cat was half-asleep when Liz Fuller stopped by. She crossed the room as quietly as she could and placed her neatly wrapped gift on the sidetable.
Cat heard the sound of rustling paper and turned her head in Liz's direction. "Boy, I ought to break my leg more often. People keep coming by with all sorts of goodies," Cat said groggily.
"I thought you were asleep."
"I can't sleep in this place. It's too quiet. Besides, I don't do anything all day, so how could I be tired? How about organizing an escape party for me? I'm going stir crazy."
"I cant help you escape," Liz said, swiping a chocolate candy from the ornate box on the side-table, "but I'll take you for a spin in your wheelchair if you like."
"Thanks, but I've had my tour of the place. Believe me, once you've seen it, the desire for a second visit is nonexistent. No, I'll just lie in bed and watch my muscles atrophy for amusement."
"Oh, Cat, stop feeling so sorry for yourself. Or is that not the real reason for your rotten mood?"
"Not you, too. What is this? The Luke Eliot fan club or something?"
"I've never even met the man. Actually, as far as I can tell, since he tried to save you from doom that day in San Francisco, you've been in almost constant misery. So, just to keep the record straight, I'm no fan of his. In fact, I'd like to give him a piece of my mind for putting you through all of this torture."
"It hasn't all been misery," Cat argued, then became annoyed at Liz's grin. She'd been set up for that one.
"I'll get over it."
"Or die trying?" There was no humor in her tone this time.
Cat threw Liz a searing glance.
"Okay. Okay. Maybe that was a bit dramatic. You're a terrific stunt woman. I certainly don't want to lose you. You always make me look so good. I just don't want to see you so upset that you make a stab again at another crazy stunt."
"Accidents happen when you're not being crazy, too," Cat reminded her.
Liz laughed. "You're proof positive that accidents can happen when you're not stunting."
Cat's eyes rested on the gift-wrapped package. As she reached for it, Liz caught her hand. "Save it for when I go. It's only a book to help you while away the hours."
"I hope it isn't a romance," Cat snarled.
"Speaking of romance, guess where I'm going after I fly out of here tomorrow?" Her sparkling eyes and mischievous smile were a dead giveaway.
"I don't know where you're going, but I could make an educated guess who'll be joining you. "
Liz sat at the edge of Cat's bed. "I know it's too soon to make pronouncements about Peter… but this could be the real thing. You know some-thing? I just realized that I have never really been in love before. How will I know for sure that this is it?"
"If you feel positively awful half the time and in utter ecstasy the other half, chances are it's the real thing," Cat said, grinning.
Liz bent over and kissed Cat lightly on the cheek. "Buck up, kid. The final reel isn't finished. You've still got a little footage left. Use it wisely."
Cat smiled. "I'll give it some careful thought."
"Well, I'd better be off. Peter's getting our tickets arranged. We're stopping off in Paris for a few days. C'est romantique, n'est-ce pas?"
"Très romantique," Cat said with a soft sigh.
Liz started for the door.
"Hey," Cat called to her. "Aren't you going to give me your autograph before you leave?" She stuck her cast out of the cover and laughed.