by Amanda Renee
“How could anyone not like chocolate?” Noah asked.
“There’s a place on Main Street called Le Chocolat that serves chocolate fondue with probably a hundred different types of food to dip in it. I went there once for my birthday, and I’ve been dying to go back there again.”
“Show me the way.” French, romantic, chocolate, Hannah. Yeah, that was exactly the kind of evening Noah had in mind.
When they arrived, the dimly lit restaurant was cozier than he had expected. The building was very narrow and long, and instead of tables, everyone had a curved booth. Good for cuddling up to your date. He was glad when Hannah scooted all the way to the middle, her thigh lightly pressed against his. The heat from her body alone would have melted the chocolate.
“You weren’t kidding when you said there were over a hundred items to choose from.” They decided on the three-chocolate sampler: milk, dark and Chilean with a twenty-item dipper and a zinfandel to share.
Once the waiter took their order and left their table, Noah gently hooked her chin and turned her to face him. She lifted her mouth and brushed a gentle kiss across his lips. He slipped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer. Reclaiming her lips, his kiss was slow and demanding. She freely gave herself to him as her tongue caressed his, sending shivers down his spine. Noah broke their kiss and stared into her eyes. A slow, easy smile spread across her face as she looked up at him. He couldn’t imagine being anywhere else, with anyone else. Maybe this was what love felt like.
* * *
HANNAH DIDN’T KNOW anything about aphrodisiacs, but she would swear everything they had just eaten classified as one. Her body tingled and ached for Noah’s touch. She didn’t want to go home. She wanted to go somewhere secluded where she could spend the night in his arms. They had options on the highway, but she’d rather their first time together happened in a honeymoon hotel rather than an hourly one. Resisting the urge to explore his body further, she opted for a moonlit walk around Ramblewood Park’s animated light display.
Noah entwined his fingers with hers and she reveled in the possessive way he claimed her hand. He made her feel special and wanted. And she wanted him in more ways than just sexually. She almost couldn’t bear the thought of him leaving tomorrow. The separation, even if only for four days, was almost intolerable, especially in the middle of the night when all she wanted to do was roll over and lay her head against his chest and listen to the sound of his heartbeat. She wanted his heart to beat for her, for their family. She wanted him to stay.
As they walked through a tunnel of red-and-white twinkling candy canes, Noah stopped and twirled her into his arms.
She giggled against him. “What was that for?”
“I want to be able to tell the girls someday that I danced with you under candy cane stars.” He slid his hands into her back pockets and began swaying to the Christmas music that played throughout the park. “I wish we could do this every night.”
“I wish we could, too.” She snuggled closer to him.
“Do you really mean that? Can you really see yourself spending every night with me?”
Hannah gazed up at him. “Noah, I couldn’t imagine myself with anybody else.”
“You know,” Noah said. He slowly slid his hand out of her pocket and up her waist, lingering over her ribs until he grazed the underside of her breast. She inhaled sharply, then checked over her shoulder to make sure nobody was watching. “If you and I made this permanent, then we wouldn’t have to worry about custody agreements or court.”
“Are you—” Her voice stuck in her throat. “Are you trying to seduce me into agreeing to a relationship?” As much as she wanted him, a part of her still felt she was betraying her best friend.
“I’m trying to seduce you into agreeing to much more than a relationship.” He placed a featherlight kiss upon her lips. “I’m thinking more of a commitment to each other and our family. I don’t want you to say yes just yet, but I do want you to think about it.”
If Noah didn’t still have one arm around her waist, her knees probably would’ve buckled. And if he was moving to Texas, she had the biggest decision of her life to make. Noah was everything she could ask for in a man and more. Being with him would mean always having Charlotte and Cheyenne in her life. And when he’d asked her the other day about having kids of her own, for the first time she’d wanted them, if it meant having Noah’s child and adding to their blissful family.
* * *
THEY ARRIVED HOME shortly after ten. She wanted to stay out later but figured her parents were eager to be on their way. They checked on the girls together, watching them sleep peacefully. She fought every primal urge in her body to invite him back to her room so they could begin expanding their family. Her new feelings were unfamiliar to her and she wanted to make sure this was what she really wanted come the light of day.
They eased the door closed, facing each other in the darkened hallway. The single night-light near the floor cast an ethereal glow. Hannah lifted his shirt above the waistband of his jeans and splayed her fingers across his abdomen. As she slid them farther up his chest, his muscles tightened.
“What are you doing to me?” he groaned.
“I wanted to see if I had the same effect on you as you do on me.” Hannah barely recognized her own voice. His skin was hot to her touch and she allowed her fingers to explore his body.
“You’re about to find out just how much of an effect you have on me.” He encircled her wrists with his hands. “You’re driving me crazy. You don’t understand the power you have over me. As much as I want to continue, we both should go to bed...regretfully alone.”
She didn’t want to let him go. Every inch of her skin begged for his touch. Every bit of her heart yearned for him to say the words she needed to hear—and yearned to say in return. She rose onto her toes and sought his mouth for one final kiss. “Sweet dreams, Noah.”
She eased out of his arms and slipped into her room, closing the door behind her. If he knocked, she’d let him in. But she heard the click of his door shutting. Hannah slid down the door to the floor and drew her knees to her chest. A warmth coursed through her veins, settling deep within her.
“I think I just fell in love.”
Chapter Twelve
Noah had always been an early riser, but he never would get used to going outside to collect eggs at five o’clock in the morning.
He’d basically asked Hannah to marry him last night. Not in so many words, though, for fear she’d say no. He knew she was still confused about Lauren and he respected her feelings. It was probably foolish of him to suggest marriage so soon, but they already had what most married people wanted after years together. He didn’t see any reason to wait.
He fed the girls while Hannah attended to the horses. He had to leave for the airport in three hours and he missed them already. He felt like he was living two separate lives. Once he had everyone home in Oregon, then he would ask Hannah properly to marry him. That was, if she would go without a wedding ring on her finger. Noah laughed to himself. That was, if her family would let her. They were a very protective family and Noah loved that about them.
While Hannah was getting dressed after her shower, his phone rang. He checked the caller ID and saw it was his real-estate agent.
“Hello, please tell me you have good news.”
“I have great news. The ranch you saw last week is back on the market. I emailed you the listing again. The owners are anxious to sell, since they purchased a new place when they thought theirs had sold. They reduced the price. Look it over and let me know. If you want, we can put in an offer today.”
Noah hung up the phone with increased hope. He ran upstairs to get his iPad and impatiently checked his email.
The listing photos didn’t do it justice. The ranch was much more breathtaking in person. Twice the size of Ha
nnah’s with plenty of flat land for farming. The stables had been recently remodeled and it even had a henhouse, along with a few other penning areas for smaller animals. The house itself rivaled Hannah’s in size but had numerous modern upgrades. The ranch was marketed as “new vintage,” meaning it was a newer home meant to look turn-of-the-last-century. He couldn’t wait for Hannah to come downstairs so he could show her.
While he waited, he decided to share with his little audience.
“What do you think?” Noah flipped through the pictures. “How would you like to live here?”
“How would they like to live where?” Hannah stood in the kitchen doorway.
“I just got off the phone with a real-estate agent.” Noah handed her his iPad. “I heard about this ranch last week and went to see it. I had looked at others, but none were quite right. This one went back on the market today and I’m going to put an offer on it this afternoon. What do you think?”
Hannah stabbed at the iPad with her finger. “This is in Oregon.”
“I know. I’m buying it for you and the girls.” He slid closer to her and pointed to the picture with all the acreage. Look at all this farmland. Well, it will be farmland once you do whatever you have to do to it. Isn’t it just perfect?”
“What do you mean you’re buying a ranch in Oregon for me and the girls? I’m not moving to Oregon.” Her face paled. “And neither are they.”
“You don’t understand.” Noah took the iPad from her and continued to flip through the photos. “What’s not to love? I made sure it had everything you wanted.” He held up a picture of the stables. “These have been recently remodeled and have full height doors to prevent cribbing, whatever that means. They’re—” he tilted his head side to side, not wanting to hurt her feelings “—they’re an upgrade from what you have here. I’m sure your horses will appreciate it, not that there’s anything wrong with your stables. And look here.” He pointed to a large dirt enclosure. “There’s an area big enough for you to practice. And here—” another photo appeared on the screen “—there are multiple pastures, plus twice the acreage you have here for you to farm. You can have a bigger organic farm than you dreamed.”
Hannah ran her hands through her hair and paced the kitchen before she spun to face him. “I love how you just decided to move me and the twins away from my family. You completely disregarded my feelings. I cannot believe you just assumed I would be okay with this arrangement. You can’t just dig up the soil, plant a few crops in the ground and call it an organic farm. We talked about this. A farm requires careful planning—Noah you have to plan your crops for the climate.”
She lifted both the girls out of their high chairs and took them into the sunroom. Noah understood she was surprised, but he hadn’t counted on this reaction. Even if she wasn’t thrilled with the idea, he thought she’d at least take it into consideration.
“I did years of research before I decided what I was going to plant,” she continued before entering the room. “My business plan took years of preparation. I can’t just pick up and move the whole operation to Oregon. Not for nothing, but this is why I went through four years of college. If it were as easy as you make it sound, I wouldn’t need a degree. The government has strict standards on what can be classified as USDA organic. Once you have everything else figured out, the physical land part is a three-year process. I’m already well into my first year. I can’t believe you did this without discussing it with me. How could you?”
“Okay, so you have to start over again.” Noah tried to hide his annoyance, but she made it impossible. “You bought this ranch in April, here it is December. Even if you started working the soil the day you bought it, you have at most eight months into it. And I’m sure it’s probably more along the lines of seven. I went out of my way to find something you would love. This isn’t for me. I think it’s a little selfish for you to turn it down without even flying out to see it.”
“I’m selfish?” She glared at him with reproach. “I think you need to take a good look in the mirror. When you were talking about making this permanent, I thought you meant you were moving here. You’re not thinking of me or the girls. You’re thinking only about yourself. You—” she pointed at him “—came into our lives. You want to uproot me, the children and my family for you.”
His mind whirled at her remark. “How am I uprooting your family?”
“Because you’re asking me to leave the people I love. They’re still going to want to be a part of the girls’ lives. In order to do that, they’d have to come visit us.” She threw her hands in the air. “You’re asking everyone to make allowances for you. Just so you can keep your job. You have no regard for me or my job.” She slapped her chest. “I have responsibilities here. I have the farm, I have the rodeo school, the horses I train and board. Let alone my professional career as a barrel racer. I’m not ready to retire yet.”
“I’m not asking you to.”
“In a way you are. When I race, I have a support system that helps me with the girls. We won’t have that in Oregon. Is your mom going to drop everything every time I go on the road? And if my parents aren’t available, my brother and sister-in-law are. The only person you’re thinking about is yourself.”
“How can you tell me I’m selfish when everything I’m doing is for you and the girls?” Noah felt his blood pumping through his veins. “I built my house—my dream house—spent years designing it, and I’m selling it so you and the girls can have a place to live with every amenity you’re accustomed to and then some.” Noah stormed to the front of the house. “I can’t believe you’re disregarding it without even seeing it. You haven’t even visited Oregon yet. How can you say if you like it or not?”
Hannah flattened her palm against her mouth and breathed deeply. “This isn’t about me liking it or not.” Her tone softened slightly. “It’s about you trying to make the decision for us. It’s not our home.”
“They’re twenty-two months old. They will adjust. Chances are they won’t even remember this place when they grow up.”
Hannah grabbed a hold of the banister. “Just like they won’t remember their mother.”
“No, they probably won’t.” Noah hated to hurt her. “That’s the sad reality. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but unfortunately, they probably won’t remember Lauren. All we can do is keep her memory alive and that’s all you because I don’t have anything to share with them. I don’t want to do this without you.”
“You never gave me the respect of even discussing it with me.” Hannah lowered herself onto the second to last step. “Was this ranch what last night was all about?”
Noah stared down at the floor. “Part of it. The other part was because I want to solidify us as a family. In order to do so, I had to have a place for us all to live. My house sits atop a steep bank overlooking the Willamette River. I don’t have a backyard for the girls to play in. It’s a beautiful home, private and secluded, but I don’t think the girls would be happy there. I know you wouldn’t be.”
“You have the perfect solution to all your problems right in front of you. You’re standing in it. But it’s all about you and your job.” She rose, rubbing her palms against the front of her jeans. “I can’t believe this is happening. Only a few hours ago I was falling in love with you, dreaming of our future together. You’ve completely crushed all of it, casting my life, my family and my feelings aside as if they don’t matter. I can’t love a man who doesn’t respect me. Whatever we had, it’s over. The girls and I are going to my parents’ house. Please be gone by the time we return.”
Noah watched Hannah drive away from the house. At least she’d granted him the courtesy of saying goodbye to his daughters. They hadn’t cried or even been upset, probably because they expected to see him soon enough. What happens now? Would Hannah even allow him to video chat with his daughters? None of this was necessary. All she had
to do was say yes.
He hadn’t expected her to throw him a parade, but he thought she would have at least considered the idea. She barely acknowledged the photos. If she cared anything about him and their future together, she would have opened her mind to the idea.
God, it hurt. It hurt that she could so decidedly end their relationship over a ranch.
He loved her. Loved. What the hell was love anyway?
Noah stormed up the stairs to his room and jammed his belongings in his duffel. The sooner he was away from Hannah, the better. He halted in the doorway, staring across the hall at the empty cribs. They had been so close to being a real family.
Noah locked the front door behind him and tucked the key in the horse-head wreath. He sent Hannah a one-line text telling her where he’d left it, then slid behind the wheel of his rental and started the engine. He drove to the edge of the property and glanced at the house in the rearview mirror. Almost a month ago he’d driven down this road for the first time. Now he didn’t know when or if he’d ever see it again.
Leaving Ramblewood meant leaving Charlotte and Cheyenne. They wouldn’t stay separated for long. Hannah may not want to move to Oregon, but that wouldn’t stop him from getting custody of his daughters. She could visit. He would never keep her from the girls or vice versa. He wouldn’t be that cruel. He only prayed she’d grant him the same courtesy in the meantime.
* * *
THE FOLLOWING MORNING, Hannah scheduled an emergency meeting with Avery. After her breakup with Noah, she needed to know her rights and her options.
“I can’t believe he did this.” Hannah paced the length of Avery’s office.
Avery removed her glasses and set them on the desk. “Honestly, Hannah, I find it rather touching that he was willing to go through all that trouble for you.”
“You can’t be serious,” Hannah scoffed. “He admitted his house wasn’t suitable for the girls. This has nothing to do with me. He’s failed to consider my feelings since day one. He had no intention of moving here.”